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Old 08-14-2006, 11:38 AM   #1  
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Default Where do you find motivation?

Well, here we go again...

I'm back at this weight loss battle. It seems to be that I always start off so strong and hit my 30lbs lost right away. But then, for some reason that number is dangerous territory for me! It's all downhill from there.

I struggle and struggle for months on getting off that plateu and when it doesn't happen I struggle some more to stay motivated. Then, it's all over and I cave. But, just as before my weight creeps back up to this VERY scary number and the whole thing starts again.

However, this time around I haven't even completely sold myself on starting again. I think I'm just scared to fail again. With every failure it seems that I lose a bit more of my confidence and self esteem. Now, I pretty much hate to look at myself and can't find an ounce of confidence or motivation to get this ball rolling again.

If there is anything that helps you dig deep to find that motivation I would sure appreciate you sharing! I can use any advise or support I can find right now.

Thanks,

Tans
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Old 08-14-2006, 11:39 AM   #2  
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What gets me going is thinking about all that cute clothes that I want to fit into. I know, I know, that's not the most important thing when it comes to losing weight but it sure helps lots.
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Old 08-14-2006, 11:56 AM   #3  
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What gets me going is that if I do nothing about my weight, then I will be the same weight or even higher 5, 10, 15 years from now. If I keep going, try to eat healthy and stay active, then I may be the same weight 5, 10, 15 years from now but I have the chance to be a lower weight. I have a chance to be a healthy person with a strong body. If something isn't working for me, I give myself a break, maintain for a while, then try something else. I view my weight loss as a lifelong journey and I know I'll always have to eat healthy and exercise in order to lose weight but also to maintain the weight I've lost. I am happy that I have made progress and know that I am doing good things for my body.
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Old 08-14-2006, 12:25 PM   #4  
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I have mixed motivators. I am so not going to lie, physcial appearance motivates me more than anything. Seeing people with bodies I admire, clothes, having my husband have the hottest wife on the block...they all do it for me.

But on a more healthy note rofl being strong and doing things I didn't used to be able to also motivates me. The fact that I enjoy working out, can run for long distances, can pass on dessert are all accomplishments I wear proudly.

Keeping up my blog motivates me as well. Awesome catharsis!
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Old 08-14-2006, 12:34 PM   #5  
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Tans, first of all, to 3FC!!! You'll love it here

I used Nelie's motivation when I first began my diet. I also said, "I want to spend the majority of my 20's at a normal weight." I used health as the main motivating factor when I began, but now I have to use vanity, because I've completely regained good health, but I want continued good health, so it's still a minor factor. I also think of my future children and how I want to be a positive influence and a good role model for them. I also want to be fit so I can be active with them. I think it's extremely beneficial to look to the future when trying to find some motivation. Even to the far future. I'm happy I'm taking care of my problem now, instead of having a weight problem in my 30's, 40's and older when my metabolism has slowed down.
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Old 08-14-2006, 12:41 PM   #6  
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I'm right there with Stephie--physical appearance is probably my main reason for wanting to lose weight. Sure, I'm doing great things for my body on the inside, blah blah blah, but I really want to be able to shop at ANY store rather than having only a few to pick from that carry my sizes. I want to be able to actually shop with my friends at the mall rather than ask if they mind if I run into Lany Bryant to look for myself while they're all in American Eagle or whatever. Plus sized clothing is also so much more expensive. I hear thin friends saying how they found these great jeans on a clearance rack for 7 bucks or something--NEVER happens in the plus-sized stores I shop!

Of course, yes, there are other factors--I am 24 years old and hope to start a family before I'm 30. Before trying to get pregnant, I want to be at a normal (or at least much closer to normal) weight to avoid the many health risks that come with pregnancy while obese. Yes, some people are lucky and have no complications regardless of weight, but with my health history, I'm sure I wouldn't be so fortunate. Besides, I want to be able to keep up with my little rugrats once I've got 'em, too
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Old 08-14-2006, 12:44 PM   #7  
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What works for me is talking to others that were where i was and have lost. So maybe it could be motivation for you that i was right where you are 4 weeks ago. I was right around the same weight, now a few weeks later, i am 10 pounds lighter. I could have hemmed and hawed and stayed the same or even gained, but i stopped and reversed the scale. Unfortunatley, my demon is that 30 pound mark as well. I have lost 30 pounds at least 30 times. But I am miserable at this weight. I feel bad, i look bad, and my kids sure dont need my eating habits. So i fight it. No matter how many times i fall of the health ride, i climb back on and try again. Good luck and i hope you can make it work this time. I know it is a constant struggle. I think i just get tired of the struggle, that is my problem that i am battling.
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Old 08-14-2006, 01:00 PM   #8  
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Part of it is appearance, and wanting to feel better about myself. I know other people don't see me as "fat" or "overweight" but I think if I worked on my arm muscles, and exercised, and worked on building muscle and losing fat *I* would feel more confident about myself.

A lot of maintainers on these boards will tell you that there is no such thing as motivation (there's a really good post somewhere on maintainer's forum, I don't remember who wrote it though). There is only determination. It is kind of like brushing your teeth or showering, it is just something you do. I think motivation helps me when I am already going, but when I hit a plateau or slump or sugar binge usually my "motivation" is nowhere to be found and easy for me to ignore.
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Old 08-14-2006, 01:01 PM   #9  
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My motivation started as totally my poor health. The more weight I lost, the more vanity came into it. As I lost a lot of weight and my health got drastically better, I thought why not continue. I've came this far. So, I decided to go for the "gusto". I started wanting to wear the smaller sizes and look good. There are so many weight-related diseases out there and I had about the full gamut of them. Being obese while I was younger certainly wasn't fun, but the health problems really hit in my 30's and 40's because of my weight. I say do something now. I sure wish I had done it while I was young and not gotten myself into such lousy shape.
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Old 08-14-2006, 01:06 PM   #10  
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Welcome back, T!

I am so glad you are making another go of it. Your motivation has to come from within, and you do have it, because you are making this first step again and you are here asking for support. This is the best place in the world for support. These chicks know what they are talking about.

You also have to remember that failure is not an option. This is your health and livelihood that you are dealing with.

You can do this, and I am there for ya'!

C
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Old 08-14-2006, 01:10 PM   #11  
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The key for me has been to construct my own diet/exercise plan that doesn't take a great deal of motivation or willpower to stick to.

I've dieted all my life and my experience has been similar to yours--it comes off, then it comes back on once I lose the motivation to keep depriving myself. It wasn't until I realized that depriving myself of what I wanted to eat was counterproductive that I finally was able to figure out what worked for me.

Perhaps in your case a different eating plan would require less motivation on your part?

Another thing that worked for me was to ditch the scale and gauge progress by measurements and how my clothes fit instead. The scale was bad for me because if I gained/didn't lose I would get depressed and binge, and if it showed a big loss then I would figure I had leeway to cheat.

I think it would be worthwhile for you to think about what kind of an eating plan & exercise program would fit better with your lifestyle than what you have been doing in the past.
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Old 08-14-2006, 01:42 PM   #12  
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When I'm driving down the street on a warm day, and my window is open, and my arm is out the window, and I see the horrific sight of how out-of-shape my arm is ... that is a motivation.

Everything I do pertaining to weight loss, I ask, "Can I do this regularly for the rest of my life?"
  • Eat vegetables? Yes.
  • Pass on 3/4 of desserts offered? Yes.
  • Pass on ALL desserts? No.
  • Go for walks? Yes.
  • Be a gym member or do exercise videos daily? No.
That seems to make the weight loss efforts so much more livable and sustainable.

I started losing weight for vanity, and then I plateaued. I shook things up by getting excited about the health benefits of food (see the Whole Foods Lifestyle forum), and that has jump-started some weight loss.

I also started telling myself that I like exercise, and making myself commit to doing x hours of exercise, just for two weeks. We'll see what happens after that.

A huge encouragement for me is to go through the closet, get rid of the too-big stuff, and discover what fits now that I lost a few more pounds.
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Old 08-14-2006, 01:56 PM   #13  
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I motivate myself to keep on doing this (because maintenance is no different to losing) because I realise how much more I can do now. My quality of life is so much better, just the little things like being fit enough and thin enough to do things without worrying about my size. Recently I was considering doing a parachute jump and I didn't even check the weight restrictions until someone else dropped out because they were too heavy - and when I did check them I was perfectly fine.

The other day I realised that if I had six months to live or something like that, the things that I would want to do would be the experience type things - like jumping out of a plane, going to Australia and climbing Sydney Harbour Bridge, running a marathon. It wouldn't be sitting in the house and eating comfort food. Thinking like that puts it into perspective - by keeping this way of life going I know that I can do all the other things that I want to do, and that's far more important to me than a slab of chocolate most of the time.

But on the other hand, I don't allow myself to lose motivation because I've had a bad day or a bad meal. I just get back on the horse and keep that routine going.

I do agree though that a lot of it is about just making it routine. I exercise when I get up because that's my daily routine. I don't always feel like it, but I almost always do it.
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Old 08-14-2006, 01:59 PM   #14  
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I could have wrote your post. I truly understand exactly what you are talking about. I have gotten to a place in my life where I can say with sincerity that for me it is more about regaining control over myself and humbling myself to admit I am weak and need help than it is just a "weight" issue. The weight came because I felt I could not control myself not to have that cookie or chocolate, or even limit my portions of them. No, this is a much deeper issue and it has been tearing my self-esteem and confidence away from me. Feeling like a failure is a miserable place to be..... Anyway, for me, it cannot be about a diet anymore. It has to be about something I can stick to for the rest of my life. I am eating foods that I truly enjoy and am eating what I normally would eat. Accountability, and CONTROL is more important. I have lost weight in the past in a very healthy manner and kept it off for over a year and a half. But I became cocky and thought I had everything licked and started back with the Ben & Jerry's and Godiva chocolate in quantities that all but guaranteed I would gain weight. Did I hold myself accountable....apparently not. This time it is about taking my life back, and for that I am willing to FIGHT.
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Old 08-14-2006, 02:16 PM   #15  
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Wow, your post was very similar to mine when I first came on here. I was scared because I had tried so many times and failed. The weight just kept going up.

I finally had to get it through my head like so many maintainers have said that this is for life, not something we start to lose weight and then go back to what we did before. If I look at it that way, there is no other motivation than health, but shopping in any store I want is a great benefit too!

I started this journey because I was in so much pain I could hardly get out of bed on some days and after a day of work on my feet all I wanted to do was come home, take 1400 mg of ibuprofen, have a couple glasses of wine and cry.

After about 10 weeks of whole foods, no alcohol, and no pain relievers and 37 pounds gone it has gotten much better, not perfect, but better. That keeps me going.
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