I'm trying not to let myself fall into this trap but it's getting harder everyday. The month of May is **** on me. Both my husband and mother have gone back to work. I just started back in December, so right now it's up to me to deliver children (2 boys to daycare). I also have to pick up one at lunch, feed him and take him to his other daycare for his headstart program. Then I pick him up at 3:15 and delivery him back to other daycare. Pick them up at 5pm and go home and start supper.
I don't have time for a proper lunch usually and I try to plan a sensible dinner. Breakfast is breakfast whatever is usually good unless I go for muffins at the coffee shop.
I'm also working on a project for my son's headstart graduation on May 26. I'm making a traditional vest and slippers, so that has been sucking up my spare time. Throw in housework, laundyr and dishes mostly. I haven't had a chance to start my seeds for my garden and will run out of time soon. I also do book keeping for dh's business. I'm tired all the time, go to bed around 10 or 11 at night and can't seem to get up any earlier than 7am which is then busy showering, making lunches, dressing the kids. Hubby helps with this until he has to leave for work, starting at 8am.
So needless to say I haven't exercised much. I'm managing to 15 min walk during my morning break but use up most lunches and after noon break dealin with my son.
All this tiredness and stress is taking it's toll. I'm eating terrible, not exercising, the numbers on the scale are creeping up and on top of that I've been smoking the last two weeks. I feel like I'm on in the drain on the way down. I know that once this month is over I will have more time for myself. No running between daycares and just wondering if I should just make the best with what I have for now and not worry because I know I'll pick it back up in June or just squeeze that exercise in even though I'm too tired? Any thoughts!
I have major guilt going on because I felt like i was doing so well with everything. I know I won't stop but worried that if I don't change soon I might not be able to.
I'm awful sorry you're having to go through all of that. It's so tough, I can tell. I wish I knew what to say to make it better. I'm in the same boat in a lot of ways, but now I'm counting my blessings, because I see I'm not HALF as busy as you are. But I share the guilt of things creeping back up on me (especially my weight). Hang in there. It's bound to get better. Best of luck on your journey. Take care of yourself. Pencil it in to your schedule. You've got to make time for yourself.
You really do need time for yourself. Do you do this schedule all school year? Its ok to have that time with your children and hubby, but what about you?
I used to take my daughter to school every morning, Eventually I started going to the park and just sitting and watching the people and waking up. I eventually started going to the other park that has the trail that winds around town for about 15 miles. It didnt take long for me to start walking a mile. It was quite nice that time of the morning.
Once you start walking you will feel more energetic. It helps to have that time also to clear your mind, Put things into perspective. Smiles.
Good Luck!
Jean
It certainly sounds like you have a full schedule. I always complain that I'm too busy to do certain things and I don't even have children. When I hear about schedules of busy Mom's like yourself it certainly puts me in check. I don't have a lot to offer in the way of advice, but do you think you could squeeze in some exercise after the kiddies have gone down for the night? Perhaps an exercise video or something. I purchased some 10 min solution DVDs and they have 5, 10 min routines per video. You can do them all or just one 10 min exercise if you want. I really like them and it never seems like too much of a strain just to do one 10 min session. Good luck!
I feel for you, and am with you. The only time I have to myself is at 5:30am when I'm up, getting ready for work. It's tough trying to balance our lives isn't it? You story sounds like mine, throw some business travel in the mix and your story could be mine! Here's what I think--- if we could only get into shape, then, everything wouldn't be so hard. Problem is trying to find the "me"time right? Its a catch 22. I know other people do it though, so why can't we? Maybe I should take advantage of the early morning, get up an hour earlier and just "work-out" I bet I'd feel better.. I just can't get myself to do it though, I'm so tired from being up half the night with my teething baby! UGH.. I don't know what the solution is. I already feel like super-mom. So much has changed in being a mother, we work now, we tend to the financials in the household, we cook, we clean, we pick-up and drop-off. We're the glue that keeps our families together. While we're the glue to a happy "smooth running" household, inside we're falling apart--but we can't fall apart, what would happen to our home? Our Family? These are the things that run through my head evey single day.
So what do we do? Any moms out there able to throw some advice our way???
Donna and Gretchen, I can so relate. A few months ago I felt the very same way. I have a very demanding full time job plus I have a 2 year old and the housework and the bills etc etc etc.
When I started this journey about 13 weeks ago I told myself that this wouldn't be easy and I also told myself that somehow I would have to find time for myself. This is kinda of how my day looks:
5:00 wake up
5:00-5:40 work out (me time)
5:40-6:30 shower, hair makeup, get dressed, make lunches
6:30-7:15 deal with a real crabby two year old, get her dressed, do her breathing treatments, hair, shoes
7:15 leave house to drop dd at daycare and then off to work
8:00-5:00 Work all day
5:30 pick up dd from day care
5:40-6:25 work out again(me time)
6:25-7:00 start dinner, feed dd dinner
7:00-? do laundry, vaccuum, play with dd,
7:30-8:00 finally hubby gets home from work
8:00-8:30 get hubby his dinner, more laundry, play with dd somemore
8:30-8:45 clean kitchen, do dishes
8:45-9:00 give dd a bath and into her pajamas
9:00-9:30 read stories to dd or just sit with her an watch TV
9:30 YEAH! dd is in bed
9:30-11:00 Sit and chat with hubby about our days, more laundry, iron clothes for the next day and maybe watch a little Tv before going to bed. (sometimes me time)
11:00 Finally its time for me to go to bed.
Good Night!!
13 weeks ago when I started this I did a very similar list minus the workouts.. Only because my biggest excuse was that I didn't have anytime to exercise. My point is that yeah I do have a busy day but I have managed to make some of the time for me. Now I know that everyone has there own thing I just wanted to let you know for me the more that I keep to a schedule the better it is. The fact that I work out 2 times a day now gives me a lot more energy to do all of the other things on my list.
So whatever you do don't give up. Keep trying new ways to make time for you. It took me a long time to realize that but I'm doing it. Because of it I am happier and so is my family. This routine stuff has worked great for us.
Marriage is a partnership. Your DH needs to pitch in and do some laundry/housework/kid-schlepping. Afterall, it takes all of you to create the mess/dirty laundry, etc., and all of you should share in the upkeep. IMHO.
Women are acculturated to putting themselves last and it's not only stupid to do so, but short-sighted. So what if the laundry doesn't get done until Saturday? The world won't end - however, if mom goes down with an illness or stress-related issues/injuries, EVERYTHING will grind to a halt.
Sit down with DH and look at your two schedules. Figure out an equitable way to share in household duties (and that INCLUDES kid-schlepping!) and make up a NEW schedule which includes MOMMY time as well as MOMMY & DADDY time. I don't know how old your children are, but we assigned chores to ours at an early age (from putting away their own toys to putting their dirty clothes in the hamper). By middle school, our children were planning and cooking dinner one night per week AND doing their own laundry. Not only does sharing the load make it lighter, but it guaranteed that by HS graduation, our children could plan a meal, read a recipe, do laundry, sew a rip/tear, balance their checkbook, save money.
In other words, we turned out responsible adults.
PLAN AHEAD!
PLAN AHEAD!
PLAN AHEAD!
Superwoman doesn't exist. Life is short. Slow down, laugh outloud every day, and never forget to tell your family how much you love them. As for the dust bunnies? Adopt 'em! Pets are great stress relievers.
Well, I've been doing this mom-thing for awhile. My oldest will be in high school next year and I have a preschooler and 2 in between. I work full time. What I have learned is: I can do ANYTHING but I cannot do EVERYTHING. Something has got to give. I go to kick cardio 3 times a week. Period. No matter what. Dinner, homework, housework, work meetings...NOTHING gets in the way of my kick cardio. If I missed it, it would have a huge effect on me....in a bad way. And, guess what? Nothing has fallen apart yet. The world goes round. I still need to carve out some more time for running and weights. Summer will be a bit more flexible, and I definitely have exercise goals in mind. When I do run, sometimes I go to the track at the high school and run around it while the kiddos play in the grass field in the middle.
Food choices: I am in charge of what we buy and what we eat so if (and when!!) I eat poorly, it is my fault.
Gretchen is absolutely right. Moms are the glue of the family. We HAVE to take care of ourselves. If we don't, who will? Make the time. Tell your partners that this is the way it has to be. Most are extremely supportive. The few who are not...well, there are probably other problems there, too.
It is a constant challenge, but it has got to be a priority! Let your partners make dinner sometimes. Everyone can heat up a can of beans and wrap it in a (lowfat, whole wheat) tortilla. Everyone can make a turkey sandwich. If you wait for time to present itself, it NEVER will because there will ALWAYS be something else demanding your time.
Marriage is a partnership. Your DH needs to pitch in and do some laundry/housework/kid-schlepping. Afterall, it takes all of you to create the mess/dirty laundry, etc., and all of you should share in the upkeep. IMHO.
Women are acculturated to putting themselves last and it's not only stupid to do so, but short-sighted. So what if the laundry doesn't get done until Saturday? The world won't end - however, if mom goes down with an illness or stress-related issues/injuries, EVERYTHING will grind to a halt.
Sit down with DH and look at your two schedules. Figure out an equitable way to share in household duties (and that INCLUDES kid-schlepping!) and make up a NEW schedule which includes MOMMY time as well as MOMMY & DADDY time. I don't know how old your children are, but we assigned chores to ours at an early age (from putting away their own toys to putting their dirty clothes in the hamper). By middle school, our children were planning and cooking dinner one night per week AND doing their own laundry. Not only does sharing the load make it lighter, but it guaranteed that by HS graduation, our children could plan a meal, read a recipe, do laundry, sew a rip/tear, balance their checkbook, save money.
In other words, we turned out responsible adults.
PLAN AHEAD!
PLAN AHEAD!
PLAN AHEAD!
Superwoman doesn't exist. Life is short. Slow down, laugh outloud every day, and never forget to tell your family how much you love them. As for the dust bunnies? Adopt 'em! Pets are great stress relievers.
You are AWESOME! I don't know how you moms do it....my hat is off to you. And I'm certainly not dispensing advice, since I haven't walked a yard in your shoes, but Gretchengirl (I miss you, my friend! ) it sure sounds like csoar, midwife and leec have some really valuable -- and ACTIONABLE -- counsel based on their experiences with balancing all of it. Hopefully some of it can help you!
I know beverly (bioaby) thinks along the same lines as me and think of our lives as a big juggling act--kids, work, housework, hubby, and then you. When you are OP and getting in your exercise all those balls are up in the air nicely. Then something is thrown in the mix (kids have to be taken elsewhere, a new project at work, whatever) and you have to drop one of those balls. Before long you feel like all your balls are on the ground and you don't really know how to pick them back up. You tell yourself fastfood today and tomorrow you'll be back to eating healthy but you just can't because now all that newfound energy and strength is gone.
What I have found works for me when I get down in the dumps and just can't find the time to exercise is I make the time (even if it is midnight or so) for 3 days or so. After that, I start to get more energy and then am able to once again get my butt out of bed 30 minutes earlier than I had been and exercise and that just energizes my whole day and I feel like it can all be accomplished.
Of course I do have a great hubby who helps out and pitches in with housework, cooking and kid detail and he knows that when I need "me" time I get "me" time.
Since you know your life is going to be this hectic until at least May 26, why not pick just one thing (it could be to make sure you eat a healthy breakfast or pack your lunch when you pack the kids so you have a healthy lunch) you want to focus on for now. Don't worry about your scale right now, focus on something for you. Once you feel like you have that part of you back in control pick you something else. Before you know it all those healthy habits will be back in place and this moment will have been just a minor speed bump in your road to health. HTH
Thanks so much for all the kinds words and advice. Things are pretty much the same but I will say that since I started this journey in November, everything just sort of fell into place, dh is very helpful does more of the housework than I do and is very supportive of my exercise efforts and will occupy the kids when he can.
It's jus the schedule change this month has totally thrown me for a loop. Dh is working full time and he's trying to finish a project for his business that will probably last another two to three weeks, so his nights and weekends are filled up. My mom who usually pitches in works weekends and I just can't bring myself to ask for help from her, she's tired as it is working and has fibro mialga(sp?).
Then there is me. I just started back to work in December and before that I was home for 13 months on maternity leave, so the two kids and working is all new.
My project that I have two weeks to complete is making a traditional vest and slippers for my son, that's a lot of beadwork and that takes up my nights, makes me stay up and then I sleep in. I'm really trying to change that, my sleep schedule has changed and it's not good. I can't really do the beadwork when the kids are up so I do it once they are in bed between 8and 9pm.
I will make a few more changes and I'm sure once the month is over I'll be able to get a better grip on things. I agree about me time, it's just hard to find it right now. I would hire a babysitter but that can get expensive with two kids. But maybe I'll do that this weekend. Call one of my cousins to hire for a couple of hours a day. Instead of sitting around after dinner I'll take the kids out and be active.
The thing that is really bugging me is the sleep. I used to be able to go to bed at 11 or midnight and get up at 5 and 6 and not be tired. Now I'm going to bed at 11 or 12 and can't seem to drag my sorry *** out of bed before 7am. I don't know what is up with that and I guess that is what is throwing me off.
How much were you exercising before and how much are you exercising now? Exercise really gives you energy and if that has gotten pushed to the sidelines that might explain being so tired.
Too busy to do anything...
Wow
) it sure sounds like csoar, midwife and leec have some really valuable -- and ACTIONABLE -- counsel based on their experiences with balancing all of it. Hopefully some of it can help you! 
