Sometimes I pm them, nicely, and just point out that whatever they said hurt me. Sometimes I reply on the thread, if I feel that their comments has hurt not just me. It depends.
Forums can be tough, and I know I often have said stuff that people have taken the wrong way. Being Australian I am really direct, and sometimes that is misinterpreted as sarcasm or rudeness.
A couple of times I have made good friends on here, arisen from a misunderstanding.
how do any of you handle it when your feelings are hurt by another poster......
It would depend on what it was. Since the vast majority of posters here are very kind and thoughtful, it is doubtful it was intentional. Perhaps a private email to the person would be helpful. Most of the time I just let things roll off my back and not let it bother me. It is highly unlikely they meant to be hurtful, especially on THIS forum where they care about things like that! Most would probably WANT a PM to know they are coming across wrong! It's very easy to do.
One thing to remember about online forums is that there is no body language or facial expression to see... maybe they didn't realize they needed a smiley somewhere and it comes across to someone totally unlike they meant it!
We all do have different personalities, and if there is someone who just kinds of grates on your nerves or vice versa, you could just avoid responding to their particular posts; I am pretty sure there is even an "ignore" feature if you really need it.
Note I am NOT a forum administrator!!!! This is just my personal input.
Aaahhh Jules, I'm sorry someone hurt your feelings.
For me sometimes I just let it go, of course depending on what it was. If it was in a post I would politely pm or e-mail the person and let them know or, again depending on what it was just put it in a post. I know with me sometimes I put my foot in my mouth one too many times but it is not intentional. Sometimes I am blunt and sometimes things don't come out the way I am thinking so they come across the wrong way. (Hope it wasn't on our thread, or me! If it was let me know because I never aim to hurt someone's feelings...ever)
First, let me admit that I am not one to get her feelings hurt easily. So, take my opinion for what it is worth.
I think whether your feelings were hurt by someone you've gotten to know through posting on a regular thread or by someone who just responded to a general post (like in the support forum) matters in deciding how you should respond. If it is someone with whom you have an established "relationship" a PM is probably in order. Nothing confrontational, just a friendly note explaining why you were hurt. It will give the other person an opportunity to explain her comments further (we all come across wrong sometimes), make an apology, or justify her comments. If it was a general response to a general post let it roll of your back. Those posts are, after all, just someone else's opinion - which they have every right to express. But, we all have different sensitivites and some of us are more blunt than others. I doubt it was an intentional stab at you.
I was a bit taken aback by a post this week too. I had a look at that persons other posts and they're always like that. Ya know? Incredibly knowledgeable and not above telling others they're just plain wrong. Some people just come across like that. I have pm'd a moderator when I thought I was being singled out and picked on. The thread was deleted and that poster has disappeared.
Like Misti said ...there is no body language or facial expression to see... maybe they didn't realize they needed a smiley
Like Lucky said .... Those posts are, after all, just someone else's opinion
Jules, honey, they don't know you from a hole in the ground and probably don't even remember what they said. Step past it. There's lots of folks who do care for the real you.
Interesting this post came today. I recieve a PM that was not so nice yesterday...apparently I am a sinner and need to ask god and jesus into my heart. I just ignored it. What right does this person have to judge me or force their religious views onto me (and others)....I was going to PM back but realized it would be wasted time and energy...
I think I was just being overly sensitive and there are soooo many wonderfully supportive people in this website I need to just get over it!!
Thanks to all of you.
Aaahhh Jules, I'm sorry someone hurt your feelings.
For me sometimes I just let it go, of course depending on what it was. If it was in a post I would politely pm or e-mail the person and let them know or, again depending on what it was just put it in a post. I know with me sometimes I put my foot in my mouth one too many times but it is not intentional. Sometimes I am blunt and sometimes things don't come out the way I am thinking so they come across the wrong way. (Hope it wasn't on our thread, or me! If it was let me know because I never aim to hurt someone's feelings...ever)
Cristina--Don't worry it wasn't you, you are definitely one of the sweetest most supportive & welcoming people on this whole site!!!
Misti's right - there is an 'ignore' feature. You click on the poster's name, go to their profile and then click on the 'add this person to your ignore list'.
I've used it with one or two posters whose views I don't need to read again. Life is too short for some things. IMHO.
Interesting this post came today. I recieve a PM that was not so nice yesterday...apparently I am a sinner and need to ask god and jesus into my heart. I just ignored it. What right does this person have to judge me or force their religious views onto me (and others)....I was going to PM back but realized it would be wasted time and energy...
omg that is incredibly rude, your right they,ANYONE has no right to judge u you or anyone else, I hope you reported them as a spammer.
well I respect their opinion. I have to deal with much harder in the real world so it doesn't bother me hey we have a war, babies are starving to death in Africa, the price of gas is skyrocketing, etc so if the worst problem I ever have is someone on a forum whom I will probably never meet is them hurting
my feeling then my life is still good. Hey maybe they had a bad day or maybe
they write worst than they speak. Don't let it bother you just count your blessing and delete
My two cents: People are entitled to there own opinions and will post them and differences of opinion will occur no matter where you go. This is okay if it is in the spirit of the discussion of the thread but if someone is posting rude, demeaning and deliberately inciteful or offensive comments then that is not complying with the rules or the spirit of this forum/site. This goes for pm's too - if members don't tell us that someone is sending them inappropriate pm's then the moderators don't know and we can't remedy the situation.
If anyone feels like they are being harrassed or deliberately demeaned then please pm one of the moderators or Suzanne or Jennifer about it and we will definitely look into and address the situation.
This is a really good community but once in a while we have a problem poster so we really appreciate feedback from the members if something serious is going on so that we can keep this site a good place to come to for all of us.
when your feelings....
If it was let me know because I never aim to hurt someone's feelings...ever)
