[laura_lags]

I paid a visit to my doctor yesterday, (for reasons unrelated to the beach). She noticed my weight loss and encouraged me to keep up the good work. Instantly the pressure was on. I feel as though I now have to live up to some weight loss expectation and I don't have a lot of confidence in my ability to do that. As a result I am acutely aware of my dual fear of failure and success. When I got home from my appointment I had 3 bowls of shredded wheat for dinner. I'm upset at my loss of control, (eating all that cereal) at breaking my diet and of not being able to live up to people's expectations of me. That feeling is compounded by my fears of failure and success. What a mess! I don't want anything to ruin this for me. Has anyone else had a similar experience?

[soon2Bfab]

Laura, I've experienced some similar....folks at work noticed the difference in my lunches, so now when I eat something not OP it's like it's national news. I feel like they are the food police. I'm sure they are "helping" me, but the pressure doesn't help. I'm sure it was the same with your doctor. Don't think of it as an expectation, more like a compliment. You've worked so hard to lose those 7lbs. YOU ARE DOING GREAT!!!
As far as your ability - girl you've lost 7lbs - you have the ability!! 1 day is not going to make or break your diet! Today is a new OP day!! YOU CAN DO IT!!!!!!!

[beachgal]

Laura and Soon, I know the feeling. People's expectations of you can cause a lot of feelings, some good some bad. I find that journaling my fears helps a lot, especially on here, as people respond and you feel less alone. I recommend checking it out. You'll find the journals here: http://www.3fatchicks.com/journals/index.php (you have to create a new login, but it's worth it!).

Laura, are you in Phase 1? If so, just hop back on for another 2 weeks. If you are in Phase 2, unless you notice cravings, you should be fine to just keep on keepin on. At least you stuck to food that was OP, and that helps a lot. But I know that wasn't the response you wanted. Feel free to post or chat on here when things like that happen, or send one of us a PM. I know you can do this, as Soon pointed out, you've been doing great so far! Noone, not your doctor, not us, noone, has the right or ability to expect anything from you in this journey. You're going to lose what you want to lose, and no more than that. And what you are happy with, as long as you are healthy, is fine. Just keep taking it one day at a time, and don't worry about what COULD happen, okay? Serenity prayer...all the way.

[sarahyu]

And look on the bright side: for binge, you did good! shredded wheat with all that fiber! Yeah, girl! Oh, unless it was the frosted shredded wheat, then it's only a half "yeah girl".

It's hard when people start to notice and you feel the pressure to succeed. When my dh started to be my food police last year I felt like eating everything in site just to spite him. We went together to Salt Lake City for 4 days last year, on one of those days we hit a all you can eat breakfast buffet at the hotel. They had fresh, home made biscuits with real home made sausage gravy. I haven't had that in years! So I had 1 biscuit, split carefully in half and put one small ladel of gravy over both halves probably about 1/4 cup, and some long cooking oatmeal with berries. This is a great improvement for me because previously I would have had a whole plate full of biscuits smothered in about 2 cups of gravy. I truely enjoyed that biscuit and gravy more so because it was a special treat and I haven't had any more since then.

Well, for some reason that opened the door for dh to critique my eating. And he didn't stop. Finally I told him that he didn't understand the south beach way of eating. Nothing is forbidden, moderation is the key.

He seems to think that nagging me was being helpful and showed that he cared. I actually found myself wanting to eat "bad" foods just to spite him. But, I realized that is wrong, it wouldn't have any affect on him, just make me feel like failure for falling back into my old ways of thinking and acting, so I told him that I may not make any sense to him, "but tough luck, you married me, so deal with it." This was after I told him about wanting to eat just to spite him and he told me I was crazy to think that way.

So I understand completely! Don't give up, we are all here to support you. Your doctor is very pleased with what she sees and isn't pressuring you at all. Think of it as encouragement to continue not pressure

I haven't lost any weight in months and people are starting to say "guess you'll start gaining it all back since you aren't losing now."

Good luck
Sarah