I hate it when people say your weight gain is "in your head."
People always say to others, "Oh don't worry! It's water weight!" or "You think your jeans are tighter and that you look heavier but you aren't" or "It's not real weight, it will go away before you know it!"
Well I disagree. If I eat bad for 2 weeks and I'm 8 pounds more than usual, I don't care if it's from water/food/binges/etc. It's still 8 pounds making my body heavier! It has to go somewhere! Don't people realize that if the scale says you weigh more, that weight is SOMEWHERE latched on your body? Of COURSE you are going to look heavier. Of COURSE your jeans will be tight! I'm annoyed at people constantly saying that sudden weight gain isn't "real."
I think they mean well, and aren't technically wrong. Most people mean 'fat gain' when they say 'weight gain', and much of what we see happening day to say is not fat gain or loss, but basic water fluctuations. And yes, they can make us feel bloated or effect the fit of our clothes, but freaking out about it is often counterproductive. Most folks are also assuming, if you're bemoaning being bloated or quick weight gain, that you're not complaining because you were off plan but genuinely have no clue why these pounds came on. And if you haven't been off plan, then it is safe to assume it isn't fat gain and that's the end of that.
If you HAVE been off plan, then maybe it is fat gain. But I'd make sure I was representing that correctly to people - not just bemoaning my jeans being mysteriously tight, but that I'd spent two weeks off plan and was feeling the effects. It would be less likely to be dismissed as a normal fluctuation or water weight unnecessarily, with a properly explained caveat.
Maybe I'm not understanding your question. People are either trying to be nice and explain that not all weight gain is fat gain, or they're missing pertinent information and don't get whatever you/me/whoever is fishing for, in publicly bemoaning their small gain.
Arctic Mama- I know my post was kind of complicated! I think I just meant, when people say it's not big deal that you gained weight (whether it's fat gain or something else). It's a big deal because it's still weight. It's still 8 extra pounds on your body that is making your scale weigh in at 8 extra pounds. Pounds=volume and that volume is going to show on your body and you'll be bigger.
I get where you're coming from. If I gain a couple of pounds it doesn't matter to me if it's just water weight or actual weight - I just know it makes me feel awful, is discouraging, and I just want to get it back off.
People have opinions, and it doesn't have to affect your opinions. They don't have to be wrong for you to be right.
They're giving you their opinions (and/or trying to make you feel better). Either way, you don't have to "hate" that they have a different opinion than you do.
I would bet (if you're normal) you can think of situations (maybe not weight related) in which you've tried to make someone feel better by telling them in some way or another not to worry, things will turn out ok.
It's what people do when they see someone in pain. They say "don't worry, things will be ok." That's the only message you need to take away from these exchanges not "you're wrong," because I don't think people are trying to say that, they're just trying to make a friend they see in pain, feel better.
It comes down to perspective. To you it's a big deal, to others it isn't. They are just coming from their own perspective and in doing so are trying to comfort you. It may annoy you, but they do mean well I'd think.
Oh no, I don't mean when people say it to make you feel better. I'm saying when other people who are interested in weight loss say that it's impossible for your body to be/look bigger after gaining some weight.
It really depends on context. For example, I weighed 1.6 lbs heavier yesterday than I did the day before. I ate a lot of sodium and therefore my weight went up. To me, it wasn't 'real' because it wasn't fat. I am not worried about water that is going to go away quickly and I doubt that it was visable even though yes it had to be somehow attached to my body. Today I was down to my weight from 2 days ago. I can only worry myself about fat gain - I wouldn't mind muscle gain or water gain. Since I won't see any weight gain from muscle gain for a long time (too much fat to lose and not lifting weights) the only 'real' weight gain for me is fat gain. If I fret over water weight I will just drive myself crazy (especially during TOM).
My biggest thing is look at the context. Yes, if you eat poorly for 2 weeks then you probably have some 'real' weight gain, but you also likely have some water weight gain too. That you can lose by just drinking water and cutting out sodium, but the 'real' loss takes work. Plus, it is just semantics to if you think the term real should be there or not.
Oh no, I don't mean when people say it to make you feel better. I'm saying when other people who are interested in weight loss say that it's impossible for your body to be/look bigger after gaining some weight.
It still doesn't matter. It doesn't matter why their opinion is different than yours, it just is. When they say they don't see any difference, it;s true, that's THEIR perspective. They're not lying to you, they just have a different opinion than you... and that's ok.
You think they're wrong, and that's ok too. If you feel like arguing it with them, that's ok too, but it might not change their opinion.
They may be just as annoyed with your opinion being different than theirs. Hopefully not, but it just doesn't matter if they do, because everyone is entitled to have and share their opinion. You even have the right to argue it with them if you really want to, but the annoyance that they have an opinion different than yours just gives you something pointless to get annoyed about.
It still all boils down to they don't have to be wrong for you to be right. They're expressing the truth as they know it. So what if it's a different truth than the one you're living with. Let them have their truth, and live your own.
I hate it when people say your weight gain is "in your head."
