[KittyKatFan]

Well, the morning was rotten anyway.

Didn't have a great workout. I set the elliptical on a setting with hills and entered a higher resistance, and I could barely do it. I normally fo around 5.0 to 5.2 mph and today there were times when I was below a 4.5. I even had to lower the resistance. And, halfway through, I hit the wrong button and the entire display erased, so I had to restart. Grrr.

Then, I thought I was just about at the next lower size in pants, and I couldn't fit into them yet. Even the bigger size felt a little tight (they are new). Had to hide some sit-down camel toe . My legs and butt fit, but my gut is so big...

Just felt really down on myself today. I think I'm doing well, but I'm so impatient and I have such high expectations.

[Brandis]

Don't be so hard on yourself. I know exactly how you feel, but you just have to look back at when you were at your highest weight. Did you feel like you would be able to come this far? I mean my gosh woman you have lost over 100 lbs (lookin at your ticker).I have only lost 18 lbs this time and I have been havin some pity moments. 100 lbs is a whole person! I bet you couldn't pick it up and hold it. Imagine how wonderful a thing that is for your body! You will not give up. Because you know deep down inside that if you do, a year from now you will have regained and will hate yourself even more. Here's some hugs sent your way to feel better about yourself, because what you've done is inspiration to others like yourself who have so much to lose. Keep up the awesome work!

[twinieten]

I'm with you! It seems like sometimes that black cloud just follows you around. Sometimes it's hard to focus on what you've accomplished when what you still have left to do seems like so much! Especially when you are hit with that obvious fact right in the face. In your case, the pants.

I felt great yesterday and then saw a picture of me. It was one of those dreaded-facebook-photo-reality-slaps-you-in-the-face-pictures. I felt like a big fat cow instead of the healthy woman I've become. I keep telling myself what a great "before" picture it's going to be (but I'm going to remove the tag if I can figure out how).

I hope today is better for you and that black cloud goes away. You've done so great so far!!

[cbressler1976]

You have lost over 100lbs!!! To me, that is amazing!! Wow! I have struggled to lose the little bit that I have lost... Don't be so hard on yourself! You are an inspiration!

[krampus]

I'm sorry you had a blah workout, I know when I have a mediocre/bad one I often feel like it would have been better to do nothing - which is totally NOT the case.

Remember where you are coming from - I bet at 331 you couldn't handle 4.0 mph on the elliptical!

[ghlover]

Don't be so hard on yourself and don't beat yourself up, OMG look at the progress you have made!
Be proud and keep going, keep moving your spirits will move with you

[KittyKatFan]

You're right; at 331 I couldn't walk half a mile without back pain, and now I'm doing six miles on an elliptical and am getting ready to go on a weeklong, 8 mile/day walking trip.

Today was better. I even had a NSV. I work for a company with a concierge servic, so I arranged for the concierge to take my car in for service. When I got the car back and was ready to leave, I got in the car and noticed the seat seemed very far from the steering wheel. I had to adjust it way forward. That's the first time I remember ever pushing the seat FORWARD! And I used to have to have the seat pushed all the way back

Last week, I had a car seat NSV too. There was lightning when I was driving to work, which scares me, and I remembered that I just had to make sure that I wasn't touching the doors of the car (some think you are safe in a car due to rubber tires but it's actually the metal frame that conducts the energy into the ground). Then I realized I wasn't touching! I always used to have the left side of me rubbing against the car door. No more! I realized I actually fit in the seat.

What a roller coaster ride I'm on...

[Natasha22]

I'm glad you're feeling better! Your progress is amazing, if anything you should be rewarding yourself for your strength instead of being so harsh. You seem really motivated and in control, so when you reach your goal weight I'll be here cheering and congratulating.