Hi Goody3shoes,
I've been where you are....lost only to regain and then come back again with my tail between my legs, so to speak. There's nothing to be ashamed about. This is a process. The key is to learn from every experience. Figure out what you did or didn't do and resolve to make it different this time. Better. You absolutely CAN do it. Remember that this is not about motivation. Heck, there are plenty of days when I can hardly remember the meaning of the word.
It's about commitment. That means doing what needs to be done day in and day out. If you ever do fall off track (and believe me, I do plenty of times), then get right back on that track as soon as possible. I read somewhere here that it's not how many times you fall, it's how many times you pick yourself back up. I'm so glad you're back and also, I"m glad you're starting at a lower weight than originally.