This is a place where you can come in and talk about binging. Feel free to post about your successes and your struggles and keep track of how many days you've been binge free. You can also vent about anything and everything you feel like getting out. We are here to share our feelings and to encourage and inspire each other.
No negativity! We are strong chicks and I KNOW we all can do this!! And we don't have to do it alone, we have each other to get us through the rough times.
ALL chicks are welcome -- no one is excluded! If you are trying to lose weight, not trying, maintaining, recovering from an eating disorder, in the midst of one, or have ANY kind of problem with food, we would love to have you join us!!
So I'm jumping and hoping someone is there to catch me.
I'm very new to this part of 3FC but not new the site. But recently I have come to realize I need to stop lurking here and admit to myself that maybe it would help if I actually participated. I am 0 days binge free as I overate last night when I wasn't even hungry for no good reason. I am having a very hard time staying on plan lately and it's not a strict plan, my personal attitude has just been very apathetic because the weightloss is going so so so slow. I have a history of disordered eating and of course, the weight loss that came from that never stayed off, so I am telling myself that I want to do it right this time but it gets hard because it's slow compared to when I lost from ED. So in order to not fall back into those old patterns (which is so tempting) I try to "not care" and "take it as it comes" which doesn't keep my mood up and causes me to eat like last night when after a very fulfilling dinner and even dessert, I had to stop at a drive thru "Just for a dessert" when I also ordered a greasy side.
So here I am, stuck in my own head and ready to stop wondering why I do such things and begin tackling the habit instead of just contemplating about it.
Not sure if this is the right place to post all this but hoping it's ok.
I think I'd like to join this challenge.. I'm currently on day 3. I've had bulimia for the last 5 years and finally forced myself to go to the doctor about two months ago. I had gotten myself to the point where I would binge/purge atleast once per day and in comparison I've cut down a LOT (with the help of medication). A little extra accountability might be just want I need to do even better!
I'm joining up on this challenge. I've behaved since Monday and got through a weekend! Admittedly we were at my parents' house to visit so it was easier not to over eat.
Ash: Thank you for joining our thread! This is a great place for support and total understanding. We are glad you are here!
Chloe: Congrats on 30 days! That is really something to be proud of! You are really putting one foot in front of the other and making great changes for yourself! Great job!
LemonZest: Love your screen name btw! Welcome to the thread!! I think it is really great how you have put yourself first and faced that fear of telling the doctor and you did it! And now you are making more great changes for a healthier and happier you. We are all SO glad that you have joined us!
Kwigg: We're happy to have you. It sounds like you had a great day today. Great job making it through the weekend!!! That is HUGE for so many of us!!! Great, great job!! You're really building up that willpower and doing great.
hey all, got a major project to do this week, so I will need help not stuffing my face from anxiety. This will be my 3rd week being binge free if I make it.
Lemonzest, i commiserate with you. I have dealt with bulimia, and was actively bping before I joined this thread.
chloe, proud of you, i'm sure you didn't gain that much if any.
Ash, i know how this kind of thinking can sabotage you. This is a good place for you. welcome.
Thanks vixsin, for starting another thread.
I did well today, when I broke my fast (IF) I did not do so with the veggies, and I felt myself starting to blank out....but then i reeled my brain back in...and stopped any damage from occuring.
I can't work myself out! I should be ecstatic today as I got through my third weekend in a row binge free, 20 days, the longest I've gone in months now, but I feel really low and I really did want to binge yesterday.
I'm wondering if it's partly because DH has taken my scale away from me... I was weighing every morning and it was dictating my mood each day, which I knew wasn't helpful. I had planned to wean myself off them by going down to weighing every other day, then every three days etc, but DH took them away last Friday and said I can have them back this Friday so I can weigh in weekly. Now I'm freaking out that I'm gaining weight without being able to see it on the scale and so do anything about it, and I feel sick with anxiety because of it.
Today is going to be a difficult day, I'm out of my usual routine, feeling down and have no-one here to stop me from having the mother of all binges if I can't fight it. I must say I'm scared...
Loving Me: Conquering the alone time... especially when it is out of the usual routine... is really hard for me too. The alone time I have on a daily basis I have planned for but when things change I get all out of sorts. I know you can do it! If I can, anyone can! Go grab a book and get yourself as far away from the kitchen as possible! Don't go for a magazine though... those always have such delish food and make matters worse for me.
Loving Me: I am thinking about you and I am sending you all of the : I can muster. Be strong. Remember that the scale ONLY shows you a number. Today, let yourself think about where you started and how much better off you are today. When you started your journey, think of how unhealthy you were and that you decided to make that change to get healthier. You decided that. And you're certainly the one who stuck to it. Looking at you S/C/G tells us that. I can feel your strength from that. It takes a very strong person to achieve something like that. You were able to have that control over food and work towards a healthy relationship with food. It's all a process. I feel that this is another step in that process. I firmly, FIRMLY believe that you can handle this. I know how tough these feelings are. I know that powerless and small feeling that you are having. We all know it all too well. Please stand up to it. I know you have the strength to do it and I know how wonderful you WILL feel when you do it and come out the other side of it. I know everything feels different. Let's sit with that. It's going to be ok. I have a line on my monitor that I refer to ALL the time "You have to be uncomfortable to grow" It's from a Biggest Loser episode Season 7. Jillian used to say it to Tara (green team) all the time in the gym so that she would challenge herself more in her workouts and in general. It helps me remember to keep fighting and that food will be some sort of a constant power struggle for me.
Again, I am thinking about you. Please don't EVER feel that you are alone. We are ALL here with you and will help you though this!! I am hoping that you will log on here and do some reading when you feel like you need some strength. That ALWAYS works for me.
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lovingme- stay strong girl! i know it can be hard to be home alone...i am quite often and it is not easy. but you can do it. also, about the scale...boy do i know all those feelings about wanting to watch it as best you can. i developed quite the obsession with the scale the last year and it wasn't (isn't) healthy. also, not realistic. truth is, the once a week weigh in is more realistic and gives you a better gauge. and, you know that if you do gain weight, that you know how to lose it. so try not to let your moods and happiness revolve around it right now. i know it is hard. but not having the scale is a step in the right direction and something that needs to happen. it will get easier.
welcome to all the new people!
as for me - day 9 is coming to a close and i am still feeling quite good. that is not to say that i haven't had my struggles the past few days. the good thing is that i am staying as busy as i can and trying to make myself feel productive and useful. when i feel like i have something that has to be done and accomplished, i tend to not really think about binging. i am still thinking about it, but i feel like it is less and less and i haven't had to fight with myself about it as much as i have in the past...to the point where i was so tired of fighting with myself about it that i just gave in.
i mentioned last week how i was thinking about when i could plan a "binge day" again and beila you advised me not to. i know. in fact, it is one of the fights i often have with myself. i used to plan them to give me something to look forward to. it also helped me keep the non-planned binges under control. but i started to have a hard time keeping them to one day and only planned. not to mention i know it isn't good for me. i don't want to have another binge day ever again, planned or not, and that is my goal. it is just hard to get rid of the thoughts and change the mindset so quickly. also, it was something i really looked forward to. so, i'm having to find other things to look forward to and fill the void i have felt since my mom died... it was only after she passed that i had these planned binge days (i've had normal out of the blue binges for the last year though). i used to allow myself "forbidden" foods at least once a week, but it got out of hand when the binging started getting worse and i started obsessing more with the scale...again when my mom passed. i didn't want to allow myself those foods anymore and worried whenever i ate them that i would gain weight. very unrealistic, but really, what i see has happened is that in not wanting to focus on the grief, i focused on my weight, food and exercise in a very unhealthy way. so now i'm having to work through it all and it is so very difficult, especially since i don't have the binge days to look forward to/am not allowing myself to binge away my feelings. the past 9 days have been good, but also excruciating at times.
i must admit though, that i do feel better then i have in quite some time. i do, however, still have a lot of anxiety about food/my weight and am already worrying about upcoming picnics, gatherings and vacations where i won't be eating the food i normally eat...and the effect it will have on my weight. it is these situations that have led to binges in the past (before my mom passed) and will be a big challenge to me.
anyway, sorry for the super long post. just wanted to respond to stuff that i didn't get a chance to respond to last week!
i'm just happy to have made it longer then i have in quite some time!
Vixsin - Thank-you! This thread always seemed very positive and I think that's what I need right now. It's a daily struggle with food, but I think I can win this battle.
jendiet - I hope this isn't too personal of question to ask, but do you think you've reached the point where you can say you're a recovered bulimic? Is there anything else you've been doing on the side that helped you?
Paris - That's incredible! Way to go!
Loving Me - I know exactly how you feel with scale addiction. I was weighing myself 2-3 times a day and I've been trying to cut down to 2-3 times a week. The days I don't have my scale I feel absolutely anxiety stricken, but I try to keep in mind that the small, daily fluctuations make me feel even worse. I truly wish you the best of luck this week.
I'm on day 4 now, the longest I've gone in the last two months without binging was 6 days a couple of times, which is pretty good for me but I think I can do even better. I've been writing down what I've been eating and how I was feeling while I was eating it. It's helped me pinpoint certain food triggers so that I can avoid them in the future.
Binge Free Challenge: 7.25.11 - 7.31.11
Great job!
Welcome to the thread!! 
I think it is really great how you have put yourself first and faced that fear of telling the doctor and you did it! And now you are making more great changes for a healthier and happier you. We are all SO glad that you have joined us! 
We're happy to have you. It sounds like you had a great day today. Great job making it through the weekend!!! That is HUGE for so many of us!!! Great, great job!! 
: I can muster. Be strong. Remember that the scale ONLY shows you a number. Today, let yourself think about where you started and how much better off you are today. When you started your journey, think of how unhealthy you were and that you decided to make that change to get healthier. You decided that. And you're certainly the one who stuck to it. Looking at you S/C/G tells us that. I can feel your strength from that. It takes a very strong person to achieve something like that. You were able to have that control over food and work towards a healthy relationship with food. It's all a process. I feel that this is another step in that process. I firmly, FIRMLY believe that you can handle this. I know how tough these feelings are. I know that powerless and small feeling that you are having. We all know it all too well. Please stand up to it. I know you have the strength to do it and I know how wonderful you WILL feel when you do it and come out the other side of it. I know everything feels different. Let's sit with that. It's going to be ok. I have a line on my monitor that I refer to ALL the time "You have to be uncomfortable to grow" It's from a Biggest Loser episode Season 7. Jillian used to say it to Tara (green team) all the time in the gym so that she would challenge herself more in her workouts and in general. It helps me remember to keep fighting and that food will be some sort of a constant power struggle for me. 
