There are times when you just can’t win – mentally speaking.
For the past year I have been in a size 16 or 18 depending on type (skirt vs. pants). Since the beginning of this year, I have lost 25+ pounds. Yay me! And now I am in the size 12/14 range. I have quite a few 12 skirts I reintroduced into my wardrobe and only a few pair of 14 pants. Unfortunately my weight has not come off proportionately. I lost back fat, stomach, waist and lower legs but my hips and thighs have not shrunk as much. If they had, I’d probably be wearing size 12 pants. So my issue is my pants are swimming in the butt and legs. I can easily cover up the waist issue. Well, yesterday I was sitting at the desk of a fellow coworker (and friend) and when I got up she looked at my pants and said, “You look like a clown”. I laughed and said, “Yeah, I know!”. I immediately felt self-conscience but not to the point where what she said bothered me too much. I had a “it is what it is” attitude. But after a while it started to really piss me off! She is dieting too and has been successful. So shouldn’t she understand how insensitive that comment was? It was bad enough I was insecure when I was wearing my 16/18’s but now I’m feeling insecure all over again!
I can’t go lower than a 14 pant right now because my hips and thighs aren’t small enough yet and the clothes would be tight in those areas. I am literally stuck between sizes! And even if I wanted to go out and buy new (or almost new) clothes, I can’t. I live alone, single income, have a mortgage, car payment, insurance, etc. And I just recently spent a LOT of money trying to get my kitty well – but unfortunately I had to put him to sleep last week. The finances aren’t really the point. It’s just the freaking comment I can’t get past.
*sigh*
I guess I’ll be wearing skirts till I drop at least another 10 pounds which will hopefully put me in a comfortable 12 pant.
I have a similar body type, all of my weight is in my hips. My thighs have shrunk but my hips are still HUGE and my pants look like I have a droopy tush. When I was 155 I still wore a size 12 pant which is what I'm wearing now.
The comment is way out of line but maybe she thought she was being nice by mentioning that you were losing weight? Sometimes people don't realize that their comments can be double ended.
What ever the case, I hope you don't let it get to you too much. You're doing a great job!
Well, I'm sure she didn't mean for it to bother you so much. Some people just need to think before they spew forth words.
In the meantime, if you are self/conscious about your in-between size, can you go find a few inexpensive skirts or something looser and flowing to wear while you are re-inventing your shape? Maybe some (and I hate to use this word, but I will) stretch pants? Lots of companies make pants with some give to them. Hope this helps.
Congrats on your loss and continued success to you!!
She wasn't tactful. I think you did fine laughing it off. Don't dwell on it.
But ill fitting pants are ill fitting pants. Even YOU already know that the pants are not fitting right and it is noticeable. You don't have to wait til someone else brings it up.
Change to skirts/dresses and find a tailor to take up the pants how you need.
It's possible what she was trying to say is - you've lost so much weight, your clothes are huge on you. If it didn't feel like an insult till you had time to sit and dwell on it, it probably wasn't. It may have been a bit ham-fisted, but it doesn't sound mean spirited.
I feel you on this, it seems Im always between sizes. I actually had a friend of mine - with good intentions I know - give me gift certificates for christmas because "You need new clothes, yours are too big and it looks kind of sloppy" I know he didn't mean it in a rude way, but it still bothered me for quite some time.
Hugs to you!!
I agree with NiteNicole. Is she the type to make that kind of back door compliment? I wish someone would (could) tell me my pants looked like clown pants!
About 2 years ago I made it a very strict point to NEVER mention ANYONE'S weight/issues/loss (in Real life) again. I don't care if a person has lost or gained 100+ pounds. I will not say a word. I used to comment all the time...say things like, "keep up the good work" or "you are doing great". Stuff like that. I did it because I liked to hear it myself when I was attempting weight loss. After being a member here and seeing the countless threads started about comments either good, bad, indifferent, weird, aloof or just plain catty, I made a vow to keep my mouth shut! Damned if you do, damned if you don't. No matter what a person says or does, it's not going to sound right to everyone.
My point is, your friend probably was trying to be funny, and it it came out sounding rude to you. Granted, some people TRY to hand out double edge comments, but most people are like me....just not so great with words.
That's rude of her. Since you are self-conscious, I would suggest that you take your pants to get altered. Believe me, dressmakers and tailors can work magic. Just find a few that you love, or that you wear often and get them adjusted. It will do wonders for your confidence.
Shop around different brands or look into maybe some skinny leg jeans- that may help
I'm sure she didn't mean to offend- honestly she probably thought she was making you feel better like "OMG girl those those pants are big for you- you know- cuz clowns wear big pants with suspenders?
The comment was meant to be an acknowledgement of your progress not an insult. I have the 'clown pants syndrome' because my big pooch belly keeps me in a larger size than is flattering to my legs. Can you say "Hammer Time"!!?
Since money is tight, do you sew or have a sewing machine or a friend with a sewing machine? It would take maybe 5 minutes to straight stitch a tighter outer seam (not crotch area) on both legs of a pair of pants or 1/2 hour if by hand. But beware, kitty will want to lay on the pants while you sew!!!
She called me a "clown". Nice.
Even YOU already know that the pants are not fitting right and it is noticeable. You don't have to wait til someone else brings it up. 
Damned if you do, damned if you don't. No matter what a person says or does, it's not going to sound right to everyone.
