Fray, I'm sending you lots of good thoughts.
You can calculate your own calories and compare them to what your food diary shows. Protein is 4 calories per gram. Carbohydrates are 4 calories per gram. Fat is 9 calories per gram.
The online food diary I use shows lower daily totals than what they are.
I am 5' 7" and over 50. From the end of April to the end of June, I went from 157 to 142 pounds by eating less, counting calories and exercising as much I could. I really pushed it to get to 138. I had to eat an average of 1150 calories per day. I did calorie cycling, unintentionally. If I went over 1350, I'd be a pound higher the next day. I got so I felt weak, tired, and, finally got stuck at 138. I was very tired of dieting.
I knew I had to find something that would help me feel better. Even with all the great support here at 3fc, I needed something that would improve my health and well-being. At that point, I decided to try counting carbs, in addition to calories. I kept them at around 90 per day and it didn't solve the problem.
Then, I decided to look into a real plan. I went low carb:mod protein: high fat and have lost four pounds in the last week, with a daily calorie average of 1589! I've been able to let go of pushing myself so hard at exercising and just enjoy my gardening, walking, Callanetics, rebounding, yoga, etc. Those take approx. 2 hours a day. They help me feel better, but I no longer feel as though they are the crux of losing weight. A younger person, or any person more athletic, would find my exercise to be not much of anything, except the Callanetics.
If it interests you, the links in my signature give thorough explanations of how that all works, and why.
My health has improved. I feel better, and I'm getting to my goals.
Don't know if any of this will be of help to you, but I thought I'd post it, just in case.
I wish you much success!