This is one of the things that has made me fail before. I convince myself that eventually I will go back to eating the way I used to. That there is no way I can lose around 100 pounds. That my body just holds on to fat like nothing else so what's the point. That I don't exericse for 1-3 hours a day, so its not going to happen....and it goes on and on....
How can I stop this from derailing me and keeping me positive? I know there will be times that I will hit a plateau, and I need to be able to combat the negativity. Does anyone have any ideas/help/solutions? I would really appreciate it.
I wish I had an answer for you because I'm in the same boat of "I suck." But then I think about it - I've been told that I was fat and ugly and unloveable since I was 10, so you know, it seeps in.
The trick, I'm trying to learn, is to not turn those moments into "awh ****, I'm gonna be fat forever so I'll just eat this enormous bag of chips." There's another thread on here about what you did today that made you proud.
I try to remind myself about one good decision that I made, and I keep the chips out of the house!
You can't look at it like one long journey to lose 100 lbs- it's too overwhelming. Take it one hour, one day, one week, one pound at a time. Set mini-goals, and whatever you do- just keep on keepin' on!
You have to accept time will pass regardless of what you do or do not do.
You also have to believe that you are worth the effort. Since time is going to pass anyway, may as well try! So what if you don't make all -100 lb? Whatever you DO manage helps some!
I'm PCOS too, so I know its hard. But you can do this! Hang in there!
I remind myself that that sort of thinking contributed to keeping me so fat for so long. Thinking I couldn't do it, I couldn't possibly lose the weight, that I was absolutely DOOMED to remain fat, that it would take too long, that I wouldn't be able to sustain it, blah, blah, blah...that kind of thinking never did me a bit of good, and when I recognise it now, I stomp it flat.
Everyday is one day you can prove the self doubt wrong. You can do it. You can lose five pounds. Then five more, and as many five more as it takes! Maybe breaking it down to day by day, and reminding yourself that TODAY is the day. Everyday is the day that you show your self-doubt that you are amazing and you too can be the inspiring success story that so many women and men on this website are. YOU can be the person who does what people say is almost impossible. And you can do it one little day at a time. Because your stonger and more determined than you think. And YOU deserve to feel good about yourself, to feel healthy, to have energy, and to to feel GOOD about who you are.
I think that as soon as you hear those negative thoughts, you should come look at your ticker. Someone who has lost 10 lbs. can't say that it's not going to happen, that they'll never lose weight, or any other variation. You've already been successful! If you stopped and maintained at this point, you'd still be 10 lbs. lighter than you were. That's accomplishment, right there.
Look at the good things, and you can convince yourself that the Negative Nancy in you is just plain wrong.
I, too, have PCOS, and it's harder to lose weight, but not impossible. Are you on Met? Because that makes a huge difference for me. If not, I hear cinnamon has a positive effect on IR.
Another PCOSer here. I feel like right now I have it under control, which is awesome. My recent blood results taken about two weeks ago showed that my blood sugar was 186. I attribute the success entirely to clean eating and exercise.
I had tons of negative self talk too. It was a huge de-railer. I needed to learn that whatever I lost, regardless of how little, was worth maintaining. I needed to learn that I didn't need to get to goal to be successful. That's all or nothing mentality.
The biggest thing that has gotten me through this has been giving myself a one year commitment. For one year, with no excuses, I am on plan each and every day. There are no excuses and if I should happen to fall, I get right back up that minute. There is no "tomorrow". It's right now. No matter what that scale says, a year is going to go by and whether I lose 50 lbs in that year or 100 lbs, I will be happy.
And I must tell you, my outlook has changed so much now that I've lost 45+ pounds. There's less and less negative self talk every day, and I was really bad. I still catch myself every now and then having "fat days", but most of the time I can see how far I've come rather than how far I have to go.
I'm not a member of the club, but I lurk here because this group is so unique, special, wonderful, and incredibly successful.
Yes, "shut the heck up" is untoppable! But as the Queen Of Rotten Head Talk, I thought I'd share a technique that helped me quite a bit, for those times when "shut up" is a little too harsh.
You would never say those awful negative things to a friend who was trying to lose weight. You'd be supportive, you'd let them vent, you'd ask what you can do to help them succeed, you'd let them cry on the days they need to rant, right? So ... this time, more than ever, it's time to be your own friend! Treat YOURSELF the way you would treat your friends. The dialogue will change - for that frenzied "I gotta eat that!", you say, "hey, I'm on my way - let's walk away from it for a while" or "Let's take it an hour at a time - let me help you pass the time".
Someone here said more than a year ago, "You can't hate yourself thin". Those 5 words were magic, and that's when my weight loss started.
I found the best way is to be here, honestly.
Im human, I have self doubt, I have bad days, I have moments that I say "Whats the point, i've always been fat and I'll always be fat"
But after months of reading posts, advice, fears, and that everyone else here KNOWS what Im going through, its really helped.
Im allowed to have those doubts and I don't have to be perfect and cheerfully positive all the time.
There's something positive about each day. I didn't exercise as much as you should . . . .but I added more movement to my day than sitting on the couch.
I didn't exercise at all .. . . . but i made healthy food choices.
I didn't make great choices today . . . . but Tomorrow is a new start and I can begin again.
I'll take a deep breath, get angry, get upset, cry, yell, scream, whatever it is I need to do. I read some messages here, post a few maybe and at the very least, I remember that everyone has bad days and tomorrow is a new chance to have a good one.
That sounds so silly sometimes to me . . . . but it's working for me. Hope you find what will work for you and use all the great things that come from 3FC.
What works for me is to call on scientific fact and logic. I, too, am insulin resistant. Fortunately, we know a lot more about IR and PCOS right now than was known even 10 to 15 years ago. And we can use that knowledge to our advantage.
For example, while there is a tendency in most people to believe "I am unique, I am special, I am broken, what worked for them won't work for me, so I can't do it" that's simply not true. People with truly broken or low metabolisms are quite rare. And even those people can lose weight. In all likelihood, you are not special and broken; rather, all the scientific rules about weight loss apply to you just as they apply to the many people around here who have lost large quantities of weight.
Having PCOS/IR doesn't make you (general you) different from a lot of people around here who have successfully lost weight. If they can do it, why CAN'T you?
Also, the law of thermodynamics applies to us all: We all have to burn more calories than we consume, in order to lose weight. Period. How we choose to go about accomplishing that task may look a little bit different, but that is what it comes down to.
So that is the sort of thought process I have for myself. Negative self-talk is really a form of making excuses for myself; because if I can convince myself that "I can't" lose weight / eat right / exercise / whatever, then I don't have to try.
I also fall prey to the internal negative self-diatribe. Something that has helped me recently was someone describing the weight loss journey less as being on or off the wagon, falling and getting back up, and more like I'm on the path all the time... I may be falling back, staying still, or going forward, but I'm always on it.
For some reason, that helps me stick to it more than thinking "so I just 'fell off' I might as well stay here". The idea that I'm on the path whether I'm on plan or not makes it easier to keep moving forward.
I've also really begun focusing more on the health aspects of weight loss, and less on the number on the scale. I've gone from being IR to being pre-diabetic, so I got a blood glucose (BG) meter and began testing in the morning and after meals, to see how my BG reacts to what I eat. Talk about an eye-opener! I can see immediately that my BG rises too much when I eat off-plan. It's a much more responsive feedback than the scale (which measures so much more than just fat).
I've also begun re-reading "The Four Day Win", which talks a lot about how we interact with our inner Wild Child -- the part of us that wants to eat and eat and eat -- and gives some exercises for helping you learn to work with your body rather than feeling like you're fighting it all the time. It's mental work, and kinda touchy-feely, but the visualizations have really helped me cut down on the negative self-talk.
i tell myself this all of the time .. but recently I revert it by telling myself i will NEVER know if i dont try to accomplish this first .. I hope you find something that will help you!!
How do you stop the negative self talk?
