I was wondering how you all coped with diagnosis. Was it easy to accept? How did you tell your family?
I ask because I'm having a hard time accepting things and I haven't said a word to ANYONE because then I have to admit to myself there's a problem. I'm not having a problem with the changes associated like going lower carb and all that. WEll, ok, sometimes the chocolate just screams and I give in, but I'd do that anyway.
My family would not make a good support group. My mother is diabetic and hasn't changed a thing since diagnosis. My father ranks on her constantly about what she should and shouldn't be doing but he weighs 110 lbs dripping wet, so he has no clue what its like to be in her shoes. He'd be the same way with me, probably more so 'cause he'd think he could influence me more. I don't need the food police.
Hubby, while a loving caring person, has a tendency to try to sabotage all efforts for weight loss. He'd be NO help at all I'm sure, which is weird because he works in a clinic and sees diabetics all the time.
Pkmom, it sounds like you know your parents well. I understand the frustration of receiving family support that comes across as hurtful and damaging instead of helpful. In my case, it wasn't diabetes, it was overeating. And it wasn't mom and dad, it was worse, it was my boyfriend and my daughter. They do their best being helpful but it came across as negative criticism (double bed). I sat down with both of them one day, when I was ready and just told them...you are not helping like this...here is what I think and feel...Half of what I said they both understand....well, hopefully maybe. The next day I felt better, and I did well with my WW points. That was about 3 weeks ago almost. So good luck, you will know when the time is right to tell mom and dad. It might be tomorrow, it might be next week, or next year. It does take some soul searching. hugs.
I'm so sorry the people in your life aren't very supportive. I am incredibly lucky and am surrounded by very supportive family and friends.
I also suggest you sit down and speak with the important people in your life. Be honest about your situation, and about what you would like from them. If they can't offer what you would like (such as helping you make good food and exercise choices) then perhaps they can at least not sabotage or be critical of you. I have always found that complete honesty may not get me what I really want, but it has never harmed me either (if said with love and understanding, not mean or critical).
It's very difficult, but if all else fails I always try to remember that I am the only person I am guaranteed a lifelong relationship with. I therefore want to live a long and healthy life. In the past, if someone is not being supportive, I have reduced my contact with them for the good of myself.
Hopefully your searching out helpful supportive environments such as this forum will help you battle against the un-helpful ones.
Hi, I am new to the forums, but thought I'd offer up my two cents.
Before being diagnosed type 2, I pretty much knew what was in store for me and where I was headed. My father and I are roughly the same build and weight. He is diabetic (type 2) and was diagnosed at around the same age that I am now. I am lucky, though. My family is very supportive and my dad is a great source of knowledge and free supplies (meter/test strips). It is important to have a support network to be there for you when you need it. And I think this online community can do just that.
Thanks all. I know that right now is not a good time to bring it up with anyone here - lots of other stressors and I can see this being the proverbial straw.
I did notice my mother, for the first time ever, turned down hash browns because "I really need to pass on that". I was quite happily surprised. She was 83 when she was diagnosed, so I've had no warning that I could be headed down that road. Now I find out she's been prediabetic since she was 40. They just didn't have a name for it. Her "sugar was always a little high".
I also realized today that there are a few other people I'm closely associated with that won't help much either. I had one co-worker tell me I couldn't have something because of my diabetes when in fact it wasn't even a high-carb item. I explained pre-diabetes and she's left me alone since. I'm not, no-way, going to go further.
Yeah, this forum is turning out to be a great resource.
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I am so sorry that you are having a hard time and don't have enough supportive people. For me I figured I would be diabetic eventually because I have PCOS, but I didn't expect it to be when I was only 31. I look at it as a challenge and that helped me accept it. I'm sorry you can't count on your parents for support, but I do think you should tell them anyway. The hubby might surprise you. Mine was a sabotager too, until I was diagnosed. Now that it is a health thing and he knows that if I don't eat healthy and lose weight it could shorten the number of years I live he is extremely supportive and helpful. Have you been to a class about diabetes? If not, try to find one and take the hubby along. I know you said he works with diabetics, but now that it is personal he should see the info taught in the class in a new light.
The coworker probably meant to be helpful. Nondiabetic people usually don't have enough knowledge about it to understand that their helpful advice is not usually very helpful. If it is someone you are very close to then you could give them some literature on it, loan them a book, guide them to some web pages - if it is someone you aren't that close to then just find a nice way to say to them that you know what you're doing and try to remember that they probably did mean it to be nice and helpful so don't hold their ignorance about it against them.
If the people already in your life aren't supportive enough then you should find some who are. Online forums are great and you might also find a local in person support group if you need more hands on (sp to speak) support.
sharing and dealing
It is important to have a support network to be there for you when you need it. And I think this online community can do just that.
