[clarelou]

hi all. i had a works night out last night and went out feeling great as i was really happy with how i looked..... until i actually met up with all my work mates and immediately felt like a huge whale in comparison to them. i know iv done well with weightloss so far this year and people have started to notice, just cant shake off this sad feeling today. sorry for the moan!

[Thighs Be Gone]

Clare, I know how you feel. I still feel fat at times too. I keep reading that it takes time to start feeling truly thinner--especially if you were overweight a long time--like I was. Keep loving you. Keep doing the things you know you should do. Best of luck to you and a big hug too!

[PhatPhoenix]

Clare I was very disheartened as at one point - and much effort cos with PCOS my weight loss is 3 times slower than most women's - at 20lb down, (two thirds of the weight I really needed to lose) no-one even noticed or commented. I even had to sit there once and hear someone say how great another family member had done - for losing 20lb. It was only when I got over 30lb or at 40lb that anyone even commented. I found that really upsetting.

But then, worse still, blokes who'd thought I was invisible started treating me like a goddess again. I hate the hypocrisy of people that you only really see once you have lost the weight. Suddenly you're not invisble, anymore. Yet I was screaming inside *I'm the same person now at size 12 I was at size 20!* The whole thing left me very disillusioned with human nature - no nice feedback or encouragement, but when I got to target, people who treat you like cr4p before suddenly think you're great again. Emotionally it's very tough to deal with because you ARE the same person inside now, as at 20lb heavier or 10lb lighter.

[anastasia]

claire, i think all of us can understand how you feel. it's especially hard if you work with skinny people or lots of women.

don't let anyone put down what you've done cos you're doing and will do great!

[clarelou]

awww thanks peeps for your kind replies! it helps loads to have people who understand to talk to. feel better already and determined to stay on track! thanks heaps x

[Schumeany]

This absolutely happens to a lot of people, I think. No matter how thin you get actually. But it does fade...at least to some extent. Although I must admit there are still days that I don't feel "really thin". Yesterday I was talking to my husband about how slim one of our friends is now as she has also been eating better and exercising for the last few months. He looked at me and said, "But you are thinner than she is." It threw me for a total loop. I would NEVER have guessed I looked as thin as she does. However, despite this episode, I promise your brain will do a better job of catching up to your weight loss. You have done a really amazing job so far. Be proud of yourself!

[dutchgirl]

Hi Clare,
So many of us have done the same thing, and it isn't necessarily the case that you're responding to how other people treat you, but to your own internal dialogue.

So many of us are way more unkind to ourselves than we would even
consider being to an other person!

So give yourself some kind thoughts, stick them all over the house on sticky notes, put them on a cd and play them back to yourself, repeat them while you are exercising, whatever it takes.

And remember, you have a whole world of people on this forum who care about you and who actually get it! we're here when you need us.

[dilleight]

The best thing is to compare yourself to yourself! But we can't help comparing ourselves to people who are thinner. So if you are bigger than your work mates I bet they don't think about how big you are at all as they are only thinking about people thinner than them.