Reality Smackdown
Hi Everyone....I was cruising along 15 months into my weight loss quest, 40 lbs to my goal, my toes were dipping into onederland, I was down 6 jean sizes, they knew me by name at the gym and then KABOOM reality smacks me in the face. We got "the call", my mother-in-law had 4 to 6 weeks to live. In the blink of an eye we were on a plane headed for Florida. 6 weeks became 9 weeks and we had to finally come back home, 1 trip to Florida became 5 trips to Florida, and now 8 months later her pain can barely be managed, she barely weighs 60 lbs (most of that is the cancerous mass), and there is absolutely nothing anyone can do but wait...and pray. We talk to the nurses at the hospice house 2 to 3 times a day. They say, "...don't come back down, you don't want to see this." When she feels like talking on the phone, it tears your heart out. This woman who had always been so level headed, so grounded, so on top of things, has been reduced to a confused, babbling shell of who she once was.
Before "the call" I was on the forum constantly, I hung out in the exercise area and participated in the "Biggest Loser Challenges". I couldn't keep up, and added the guilt of letting my team down to all of the other "stuff". The stress level in our house is through the roof, I have re-gained 44 lbs and 2 jeans sizes (I should probably be wearing 3 sizes bigger now), and I am don't like where I am headed. I know how the book is going to end, I can't do anything about it so I have to start taking steps to reclaim my life.
I need this forum, would you all mind if I hung out here?
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And try not to focus on the regain; your 56 pound loss is something to be very proud of.
