[S.A.S.H]

I'm sorry chicks but I really need to vent (and get some suggestions) before I binge myself into oblivion.

I don't understand what I am doing wrong. Last week was my first week. I lost 3lbs. I was semi-happy with it ONLY because with my stats and it being the first week I was kind of expecting at least a 5lb loss. I only want a 1-2lbs loss per week after the first week.

So DH, who has some nutritional background, and I went over my food plan and he said I wasn't eating enough calories and definitly not enough protein. What I thought was around 1800 was actually more like 1200. So he revamped my menu plan this week. Has me eating 5 small meals every 3-4 hours, much more lean protein, and hitting the 1700-1800 calorie mark.

I HAVE GAINED!?!?! I have gained back almost the whole 3lbs I lost, leaving me only 1/2lb away from starting weight.

I have been OP every single day. This is HUGE for me. I have never lost a signifigant amount of weight due to the "Ill just be fat a little bit longer" mentality.

Going on 10 Days in a row now. I am getting over 64oz of water a day. My exercise hasn't been great, I am starting slow because I am so out of shape, but I have been moving and doing a very brisk walk at least 20 mins out of the day, in the middle of my most sedentary period (at work). I have been posting my menu on the menu thread.

This is compared to my old habits of 3000-4000 calories a day and NO movement. I just dont get it. I'm seriously on the brink of an emotional binge.

Could my metabolism just be that slow? If so, what can I do to speed it up? I know it's not TOM or anything like that. Would my body just hold on to everything for a while and then start dumping like crazy? ::sigh:: I don't understand.

Thanks for letting me vent.

[PhotoChick]

Sweetie, you need to really back off your expectations. 5lb of weight loss is a totally unrealistic goal, especially at your weight. Most people would be THRILLED beyond words with losing 3lbs and you used that as an excuse to want to give up? If you feel that way after your very first week AND losing weight, what are you going to do when you are a month or two months into your plan and you hit a week where you don't lose anything? Or worse, when you gain back??? Because I guarantee that will happen to you at least once during your weight loss journey.

You're going to have to somehow wrap your mind around the fact that you are NOT going to lose like clockwork. That's not how this journey works for anyone.

Ideally you should expect to lose about 1% of your body weight per week on average. That means at your weight, 3lbs is an EXCELLENT rate of loss. It's above average and outstanding.

But you should also note carefully the "on average" part. That means some weeks you'll lose that 1%. But some weeks you won't. Maybe it's your period. Maybe you ate something salty and are retaining fluid. Maybe the barometric pressure is changing. Maybe you worked out really hard and your muscles are retaining water. There are umpty-dozen things that can affect what your scale reads - and that has no bearing on whether you've lost fat or not on any given week. The only thing that is reliable is progress over time.

Ok, now having said all of that, I do agree that 1200 calories is too little for you. I started out at about your weight and eating 1800 calories and lost just fine for a long time. I dropped to 1500 calories when I got into the 180s or so.

It's highly probable that the first 3 lbs you dropped were mostly water weight. When you began eating more again, and maybe eating a little more salt, you gained them back. Also, again, how close is it to your period? That will affect what the scale says.

Seriously ... be patient. Change your expectations - because if you base whether or not you want to continue to be healthy on unreasonable expectations re: the scale, then you're going to set yourself up to quit over and over and over again.

If you continue to eat healthily and exercise you WILL lose weight. It just doesn't happen overnight.

.

[sakk]

How is your sodium intake? I track regularly on The Daily Plate so that I can also monitor my sodium. I tend to retain fluid, so that's a biggie for me. It could be, too, that you are adding in things that are better for you. The first week is normally just fluid retention, etc., since you're getting in the water. TDP also shows a pie graph that lets you know what percent of carbs, protein & fat you have taken during the day. You may want to take a look just to see if your plan is keeping you pretty balanced.

Otherwise, I'd say give it another week or two. We didn't gain our weight in two weeks, so it'll be a battle to take it back off. Let your body find something that works, and certainly keep a food diary (either online or in a notebook, etc.). Different calorie amounts work for different people.

There's another website that I've found to be very informative. It's Jenn's blog. I don't know if they'll allow me to post the site here or not (let's hope yes???). It is www.j3nn.net. Jenn has a lot of info about calories on her blog. She also posts pictures pretty much daily of her meals, along with nutrition information.

Keep with it!!

[chick_in_the_hat]

As usual, Photochick beat me to it.

How about if you think of this in terms of a life long journey....because even after you have lost the weight and gotten to goal, it's not like you can just go back to old habits and maintain the loss. It might sound depressing - but for me it's just reality. Thank goodness I found calorie counting as a plan because I all the flexibility and choices.

I'm off to check out your blog. Congrats on recommitting!!

[rodeogirl]

1200 is too few but i'm wondering if 1800 is too high if you want to lose 2 - 3 lbs per week. I'm at 309lbs and eating 1866 net calories a day. At 265 I would probably shoot for 1506 - 1756 net calories per day. I wouldn't go less than 1500 though.

At your weight 3lbs per week is on the high end - anything beyond that is pretty unrealistic and getting into the unhealthy range.

If you are approximating your calories you might want to try weighing things for a week just to make sure your count is pretty accurate.

[Thighs Be Gone]

OP, hang in there. Sometimes positive changes take a little bit of tweaking to get just right. Keep at it until it works for you. It is SO worth it.

[chick_in_the_hat]

Hey - is Calorie Count an online application where you track your calories? If not - you might want to try FitDay or The Daily Plate. They are both free and fabulous for being able to run reports and track calories (of course).

[msroboto]

Stick with it. I started out right where you are. It's a journey not a sprint.

I really am not counting calories as much as changing the way I eat. Protein and eating more times per day. Water. You know the drill.

Walking is exercise and if that's what you can do now that's good. You might want to add some weight training in the future and maybe speed up the walks to get some cardio burn. psst...if you exercise you can eat a little more and still lose weight or stay at 1800 and maybe lose a little faster.

I have said this before in a couple other posts my body is weird. I either lose 5 pounds or nothing. I gained it similarly never 1 pound at a time always 5 pounds at a time.

I have had times when I don't have any scale losses for a month or more. I am still averaging about 4 pounds a month and I think that's fine.

You're on your way. Stay with it.

[S.A.S.H]

Thanks Ladies, I really do appreciate all of the support and suggestions.

I definitly do not have a goal of 3lbs PER week. I just expected more the FIRST week or two. Especially since the 1st 10lbs is usually just water weight. Realistically I am only trying for 1-2lbs per week, the slower the better! This is a lifetime choice for me, not just a "diet", so I will definitly continue with my eating choices. I guess I just had expectactions for the first week or two that were unreasonable.

It could be that my body is just adjusting to all of the changes. First not only is it not getting all the junk it used to, but then it got starved. Now I have the proper balance of food so maybe it's just making sure before it starts to let go. I shouldn't start PMSing until next week, with TOM the week after or so. Who knows. Something has to kick in somewhere I guess. I can't imagine it's possible to do a complete nutritional and physical turnaround and not see results SOMEWHERE along the line right?

I do keep a blog (which I need to update) along with a seperate food journal where I write down what I ate, the time I ate it, the amounts and how I felt before and after I ate it every time. I also do use calorie count, I like it better compared to fitday and Dailyplate.


Thanks

[PhotoChick]

I just expected more the FIRST week or two. Especially since the 1st 10lbs is usually just water weight.

Where did you hear this? Because it's not really actually true.

It's possible that for *some* people the first 10lbs are water weight. But I would say that was a very rare exception.

Even so ... again, I'd say really think about your expectations. I know you say you're expecting 1 or 2 lbs per week, but you do have to consider that over the course of your journey there will be weeks where you won't lose anything and even weeks where you'll gain.

I think if you stick with what you're doing, you really will be fine!

.

[S.A.S.H]

Originally Posted by PhotoChick

Where did you hear this? Because it's not really actually true.

It's possible that for *some* people the first 10lbs are water weight. But I would say that was a very rare exception.

Who knows? Probably one of the myths I grew up hearing and incorrectly believing. Live and learn right?

Even so ... again, I'd say really think about your expectations. I know you say you're expecting 1 or 2 lbs per week, but you do have to consider that over the course of your journey there will be weeks where you won't lose anything and even weeks where you'll gain.

I think if you stick with what you're doing, you really will be fine!

.

I completely understand and agree. I know there will be weeks when I don't lose anything, slip ups when I gain that I understand and gains that I *don't* understand. As long as the trend goes downward I am ok with that. Slow and steady wins the race and has a better chance of *staying* off. I didn't gain it all in a few months and I certainly don't want it to come off that quickly either, even if it would. I've decided to just do my best to put expectations away and go with the flow, wherever it takes me.

Thanks again for all your help

[chick_in_the_hat]

Originally Posted by JustWannaBeMe

I do keep a blog (which I need to update) along with a seperate food journal where I write down what I ate, the time I ate it, the amounts and how I felt before and after I ate it every time. I also do use calorie count, I like it better compared to fitday and Dailyplate.
Thanks

Hey - I looked for Calorie Count online - is it the same as Food Count? I'm just asking because I haven't heard of it yet....can you tell us what you like about it?

[kaplods]

Caution: Typical kaplods novel ahead,

I've learned that sometimes you have to unlearn almost everything you think you knew about weight loss, especially about what you think "normal" weight loss looks like. Sometimes even about what you think you knew about yourself, and what is "normal" for you regarding weight loss.

I've been over 300 lbs nearly my entire adult life, and obese since kindergarten. I've only lost 60 lbs or more, three times in my life. 70 lbs (from 225 - 155) during high school (becaue I was prescribed amphetemine diet pills at 13). 60 lbs on Nutrisystem to be in a friend's wedding (from 285 to 225) and 60 lbs after herniating a disk (from 368 to 308). I herniated the disk in 1993 or 1994.

During those attempts, I did lose huge numbers per week (even though it got slower and slower not only as the diet progressed, but compared to the attempt before). I was also constantly out of my mind with hunger, and I would always binge eventually (more like go on a 3 day bender, like an alcoholic). It would get harder and harder to get back on track, and I would start thinking I was a miserable failure and just wasn't ABLE or capable of suceeding (mostly because my idea of success was so warped). Or that the effort required to do so wasn't worth it. And sometimes the way I was doing it - it wasn't worth it. To "succeed" according to my rules, I had to invest every grain of effort and thought I had into the process - no time for anything or anyone else in my life. It all had to be about weight loss or I stalled or gained. So I said no to everything except work and weight loss, and often wished I could have said no to work, but I felt I had to put in my 8 to 16 hours or more every day to prove that I might be fat, but I wasn't lazy. Still, I'm surprised my work didn't suffer, because most of the time I was thinking at least as much about what I wasn't eating than I was thinking about the job.

When I had to stop working because of health problems four years ago, I thought "Finally, weight loss is going to be easy, because I can devote all of my time to dieting and exercising." Well, it didn't quite turn out the way I expected.

About a year ago, I discovered that by changing my birth control and switching to low carb, I could eliminate that constant, crazy hunger that made me feel starved even after I had eaten until my stomache hurt. The difference was SO dramatic, I thought "Woohoo, the weight is going to just fall off."

Well, it's a year later, and I've "only" lost 40 lbs (I lost 20 lbs in the first year of being unemployed. I wasn't dieting, just the changes in not working - having more time to take care of myself - resulted in an unintentional weight loss. In fact, if it weren't for that accidental weight loss - I'd never accidentally lost so much as a lb before - I wouldn't have even attempted another weight loss attempt, because in my experience dieting just made me eventually gain weight, and I was so close to 400 lbs, I was terrified of gaining even another few lbs. Even so, it took me another three years to stumble on the "secret" of success for me bc and lower carb eating).

"Only" 40 lbs in a year. I never, ever would have considered that success in the past. It would have been reason to quit long ago. This is my first weight loss attempt to last more than a year (at least without the aid of prescription drugs - my weight loss in high school took a little over a year, and I'd undid it all in fewer than two).

None of this really applies to you, except that I learned to look at success ALOT differently. By all of my old definitions, I am failing miserably, and yet unlike every attempt in the past, I don't feel my future is uncertain. I have absolutely no doubt that I will maintain my current weight loss and continue to lose weight. I have no idea if I will ever reach my "ideal" weight (whatever that means, anyway). I don't even know if I will ever reach a NORMAL weight. By every standard I ever used since age 12 - I am failing miserably. But I am going to continue to "fail" my way healthier.

I realized that when I focus on my efforts, not the results I can keep going, regardless of how long it takes. But, if you focus on the results, it is very likely that you will often (if not always) be dissatisfied.

Another thing I would ask you to do, is get rid of the guilt. Weight loss is so hard, that the vast majority don't succeed (NO, this is not reason to give up). It's just important to realize how HARD this is, and how the tiniest measures of progress mean you're doing a PHENOMENAL job. Those 3 lbs were AWESOME, but the 24 ounces you've maintained are also AWESOME. You're already doing better than you think. Part of failure is seeing yourself as failing.

When we hear or read stuff about weight loss that says a maximum safe weight loss is 1% of your body weight, we think that means it is the "average" weight loss - or the weight loss that everyone else is somehow achieving. Nothing could be further from the truth. The "average" weight loss, is actually very close to zero. Yep, most people who try to lose weight, even during their first week actually lose zippo, nada, nothing. If you make it to week two (even if you lost nothing week one), you are actually doing better than average (because half of the people who didn't lose their first week, have already given up).

Every day you stay on this path - you are closer and closer to the head of the pack (whether or not you've lost a single pound).

These are the statistics that we do NOT hear. Sometimes the rationale is that the "real" statistics would be so depressing, no one would try to lose weight. I think the opposite is true. When you think everyone else is doing marvelously, you wonder why you stink so bad at it. If one person was told that learning to play concert piano was easy and that most people master it in a week. And another person was told it would take years to become good enough for anyone to want to listen to - who do you think would give up first?

Don't be fooled, weight loss is a complex skill like any other, and your first efforts are going to suck compared to what they eventually will be. Whatever you do, don't use a mistake as an excuste to make a bigger mistake, or as I say so often that I'm starting to see myself quoted, "Don't throw yourself down the staircase when you stumble on a step."

I am crawling up those steps. In the past, I sprinted but when I tripped, I did throw myself to the bottom. The tortoise really can beat the hare. That doesn't mean a hare can't win either, but you don't have to be the hare. The speed doesn't matter nearly as much as continuing to move in the right direction, no matter how slowly. Even though I'm crawling, I know (since I learned to stop throwing myself to the bottom) that I will eventually get to the top.

You can too, if you can learn to be patient with yourself.

[Lyn2007]

Kaplods, you're really such an asset to this board and to everyone who knows you. I appreciate the time you take to write your "novels." Such insight. Thank you!

[Thighs Be Gone]

My thoughts exactly Lyn. Thanks, kaplods.