[chitownchica14]

Hey guys. I've been reading the boards for awhile (5 or 6 months probably?) but for some reason I didn't have the courage to join. Well, I finally got myself together and decided to do it.

I'm an ex-anorexic. I was sick for about 2 years and in and out of treatment throughout highschool. senior year it turned around and i started bingeing. i have been in this binge/starve cycle ever since (I am a sophomore in college now.) I am not overweight, but bingeing causes my weight to fluctuate a lot and i am not comfortable with my body. Even though I hate to say it, sometimes I miss my old skinny self (for years I was about 115-120 lbs, which is too thin for my almost 5'9 inch self.)

I also have been a compulsive exerciser on and off for about 4 years, as well as diagnosed with clinical depression and am prone to severe panic attacks/anxiety.

I would like to be abour 135 - 140 lbs ideally. Healthy, but not too thin for me. I have been trying to stay on track. When I don't binge I dont have too much trouble eating healthy - it's the binge episodes that get out of control and screw everything up. I have been in therapy dealing with my depression (I am on Wellbutrin which has helped my binges somewhat too.) But I think it's time I really found a supportive community to help me through this. It's really hard to have to deal with this, especially as a college student away from home (plus...dining halls and drinking = binge danger zone, big time.)

Anyway, thanks a bunch for listening. I'll be around - any friends would be nice!

[Lovely]

Hi there &

[daizylin]

Welcome!! It took me a few weeks to post here as well, but I am so glad I did. I look forward to getting to know you!

[queenofthehouse]

Hi and welcome! I'm pretty new here myself, don't have much time to post, but love the feeling of not being alone with the problems I have with food.

[gastronome]

Welcome! You'll find lots of good support here. I did the same binge/starve cycle too for about 9 years... But then always gained more weight back in the end.. Eating in moderation and FREQUENTLY has helped me to settle into a good weight even though I still have some body image issues. It was really only after reanalyzing my life that I decided eating right and being healthy was WAAAAAY better than being stick thin. That ugly cycle of binging and restricting was messing with not only my life but also the happiness of my son and husband since I was always CRANKY because I either ate too much or too little. It's a tough road, but we'll make it. Eat to lose! WOOOT! Glad you joined =)

[annabow]

Hiya! I'm pretty new too, but read posts all the time!

I'm at uni at the moment and so I think we're pretty much in the same boat! I also had an anorexia "episode" for a year or so and although I never had treatment for it, it now it seems like I have the reverse problem and I cannot stop over-eating. I know what you mean when you say you long for the skinny you again, although you know you were in serious ill-health then, you also remember a sense of easiness right? You had control and that made you feel more comfortable in your own skin? I know those feelings so well.

But it's really important not to relapse, so stay strong honey! And it's good of you to join us!