[Malinki]

Yesterday (Christmas Day) was my 90th Day of abstinence!

It is just so weird to think back on when I started in OA in September and I could never have imagined still being in recovery 3 months later - but with my higher power's unending love and help, here I am.

So over the last 90 Days, I have planned and eaten 3 meals a day and nothing in between, seen a significant improvement in the amount of time and energy I spend obsessing about food, eaten healthily, seen my skin begin to glow because my body is happy to happy good clean food as opposed to the junk I ate before, I never feel like I am dieting or missing out if someone is eating junk around me, I have learned to like myself a bit more, I am getting better with other people, I don't assume everyone is judging me because of my size, I have just had a big family Christmas and didn't feel particularly interested in the mass of sweets and chocolate that were laid out for being to snack on while we were opening our presents, I ate my Christmas lunch (it was delicious), I filled my plate once with the things I wanted to eat and didn't help myself to any more and I didn't want anymore, I enjoyed my lunch without stressing about calories or getting more food, I stopped eating when I felt full. More importantly, could enjoy my family without being so focused on the food that I couldn't give them any attention.

Physically, I have lost 31lbs in the last 90 days, but the best thing is feeling better in my head, free from guilt and more connected to the people around me and my higher power.

I am so thankful for my recovery and all the amazing support I find on the board.

[marny]

Yahoo! That's awesome!

[sidhe]

Good for you! You should be proud of yourself.

[BellaLucia]

Congratulations Malinki. May you continue on the path to great health.

[SPIRITANGEL]

Wow I can only imagine what that must feel like. Does it get easier?????
I hope so. I'm on day two and feel shakey. I desperately don't want to take that first bite that inevitably leads to a monstrous binge.

Tell me more about what it feels like to be abstinent if you can. I need all the hope and inspiration I can get.

[marny]

Yep, it gets easier. If it didn't, I wouldn't still be here!

[Malinki]

Originally Posted by SPIRITANGEL

Wow I can only imagine what that must feel like. Does it get easier?????
I hope so. I'm on day two and feel shakey. I desperately don't want to take that first bite that inevitably leads to a monstrous binge.

Tell me more about what it feels like to be abstinent if you can. I need all the hope and inspiration I can get.

It definitely gets easier; after the initial carb drop that is physically quite tough I was much better and have found over the last month or so that I am at a point where the food stuff mostly ticks over so long as I watch the programme side of things.

If you want to read more about what my abstinence feels like then I have a blog you can read through, the link is below. I hope that helps.

[SPIRITANGEL]

Thank you so much. I really appreciate you mentioning your days. Being someone on day four it's nice to look at those abstinent ahead of me and know that it gets better.

My head lies to me. IT SAYS- YOU CAN'T DO THIS FOREVER, YOU'LL BINGE BEFORE THE END OF THE WEEK ETC.......

It's great to know that other crazy, powerless, insane overeaters can get well and can move out of the **** hole of compulsive overeating.

I look back over my binge eating days- too many to remember probably 1/3 of my 26 yrs alive and I have done so many sneaky things.

Being abstinent today and feeling some peace is different to driving around town in the car stuffing myself, having the bins full of food wrappers, throwing out biscuits and then searching thru the bin to eat them the next day........ it goes on and on.

Thank you that their is an answer and thank you to everyone on this board for being here.
I don't live near meetings so this is like a life line.
Thanks
Susie x

[SPIRITANGEL]

Thank you Malinki,

I love your abstinence blog. It's really helping me.
Thank you for being an inspiration
God bless
Susie x

[marny]

My day count will be two years on March 3-- one day at a time.

I haven't stayed abstinent each of these days by my own ability or will. I'm a sick, addicted puppy. I worked the program, did what my sponsor told me, went to meetings, and used the tools.