[Erin P]

So I am new. I have been educating myself online about OA but still have some questions about it and was hoping you guys could answer them.

I know I am a compulsive over eater. I have been in therapy on and off for 7 years for different eating disorders but I feel I will not successfully conquer this without community and accountability. I have a community, but no one seems to understand the eating stuff in my life exept my therapist. OA seems to give this community that understands and is equiped with helpful tools. And I really like the idea of a sponsor,which seems to be a mentor. I have never been to an OA meeting and am scared to death of going but totally would. Is there a special meeting for first timers or do I just find the meetings in my area and go. Also what was you guys first meetings like (what did you feel, what were you thinking, what happened before to make you go, what happened during the meeting and after. Any other information you feel you need to include please do. Thanks guys. I really appreciate it.

[sidhe]

There are "newcomer" meetings, yes. They'll be marked as newcomer, usually they're before a regular discussion/sharing meeting. It's 30 minutes, and the person who is leading will explain the 8 tools and answer questions. People will start to trickle in (if there's a meeting afterward) and everyone is really nice, really welcoming.

My newcomer's meeting was a bit awkward (nobody made me feel awkward in any way, it was my own defenses springing up), I felt like everyone was going to know why I was there. Well, DUH! Of course they did! and they were there to welcome me, and to help me. They also gave me a newcomer's packet, which is some pamplets and writings that explain more about OA and help you determine if OA is right for you.

They say you should go to 6-7 meetings before you make a decision. For me, I knew in my gut that it was right for me from that first newcomer's meeting. At my second meeting (the monday noon after my saturday 8am newcomer's) I met the woman who is my sponsor, and the next day I was abstinent. And it's been incredible, really. The network and support of OA is intense, and it's something you won't get from a therapist. No offense to therapists, they just can't be there all the time, and you're lucky if you get about an hour a week. OA is REALLY structured to help you. I encourage you to give it a chance.

[marny]

Hi Erin-

Welcome! I'm glad that you found us.

Our local meeting doesn't offer a new comer's meeting. New folks come to the regular meeting, and we welcome them and give them a new comer's packet there.

Not all meetings are the same. Some are literature meetings which means that a portion of an OA book is read and discussed. Some meetings are speaker meetings where someone shares their personal story of compulsive overeating. Some meetings are discussion based where people share how their programs are going. Many of our meetings are some combination of those.

Most meetings have some structure. Usually a meeting secretary will read some information aloud about the purpose of OA and the meeting. Members will volunteer to read the steps, traditions, or prayers.

You may be asked to introduce yourself-- you can just say, "Hi, my name is Erin." Or you can add a bit more.

You may be asked if you want to read or share, and it's okay to say, "No thanks", or "I pass".

It may help you to remember that everyone in that meeting was a first timer at some time-- they felt like you do. They go there for support and to be supported. You will not be judged. You will not be weighed. You will instead hear from people who are walking the road of recovery and have found a way of life free from the obsession with food. You will see people of all different shapes and sizes as Compulsive Eating really isn't about how much fat you are wearing, but about the obsession in our heads.

My first meeting was a whirlwind of emotion, new ideas, and confusion. I had never experienced so much honesty from people. It was awesome.

Let us know how your first meeting goes!

[charlenej]

Hi Erin,

There were no newcomer meetings where I attend OA regularly.

I called the contact person to make sure there was still a meeting and to ask about what to expect. I was greeted by the phone contact person very warmly and decided to go the meeting. I sat in my car for a while before going in and then in a mad dash ran inside. I cried through the whole meeting as I, too, had been going to therapy for a while and it did help but to hear others struggling, recovering, and having been in recovery and free from food for years was really what helped me to get real, start my OA program, and really start peeling back the layers and all those years of food.

Any meeting you go to will be welcoming, I am most sure.

Please do let us know how it goes

Charlene