Now.....proceed.......
Children laugh 146 times a day, adults laugh only 4 times a day.....No wonder we're so unhappy...Sometimes when you have a stressful day or week, you need some silliness to break up the day. Here is your dose...
Follow the instructions to find your new name.
The following is an excerpt from a children's book, "Captain Underpants and the Perilous Plot of Professor Poopypants" by Dave Pilkey. The evil Professor forces everyone to assume new names...
Use the THIRD letter of your FIRST name to determine your New first name:
a = poopsie
b = lumpy
c = buttercup
d = gidget
e = crusty
f = greasy
g = fluffy
h = cheeseball
i = chim-chim
j = stinky
k = flunky
l = boobie
m = pinky
n = zippy
o = goober
p = doofus
q = slimy
r = loopy
s = snotty
t = tulefel
u = dorkey
v = squeezit
w = oprah
x = skipper
y = dinky
z = zsa-zsa
Use the SECOND letter of your LAST name to determine the first half of your new last name:
a = apple
b = toilet
c = giggle
d = burger
e = girdle
f = barf
g = lizard
h = waffle
i = cootie
j = monkey
k = potty
l = liver
m = banana
n = rhino
o = bubble
p = hamster
q = toad
r = gizzard
s = pizza
t = gerbil
u = chicken
v = pickle
w = chuckle
x = tofu
y = gorilla
z = stinker
Use the FOURTH letter of your LAST name to determine the second half of your new last name:
a = head
b = mouth
c = face
d = nose
e = tush
f = breath
g = pants
h = shorts
i = lips
j = honker
k = butt
l = brain
m = tushie
n = chunks
o = hiney
p = biscuits
q = toes
r = buns
s = fanny
t = sniffer
u = sprinkles
v = kisser
w = squirt
x = humperdinck
y = brains
z = juice
For example, George W. Bush's new name is Goober Chickenshorts.
My new name is Zippy Applesniffer
What's yours?
Strange, my brothers used to call me poopsie as a kid...Ahh my true destiny!
...guess that makes me Loopy Gizzardtush! 
..................GOFISHIN
