Don't apologize!! I think we have ALL experienced that type of treatment at some point or another, and it is good for us to deal with those feelings. I remember being REALLY mad at men when I was younger....."SURE, NOW I'm attractive, but I'm the same person i have ALWAYS been." I think that is why we HAVE to do this for ourselves. No matter how big or small we are there is ALWAYS going to be someone criticizing us for SOMETHING. We all have to get to a point where it just doesn't matter so much. I know that no matter how much weight I lose my in laws will still consider me heavy, and I just don't care anymore. I'm sick of yo yoing, and I KNOW that I will not starve myself for the rest of my life, so I need to do what is right for ME. To find a point I can be healthy but not fanatical at, and LIVE there!!!

Hey Shanara, I hate that too, when someone says (meaning to be nice) oh you've lost a lot of weight! I am sort of glad to hear it BUT I always also hear the implication that I must have looked so much bigger before, etc. And actually I didn't really notice how big I was, I have a problem truly seeing myself accurately (even in a full length mirror) so...I just don't like people saying it in that loud voice they use. Then again most people say nothing - even people I have known casually for years - and I wonder, don't I look any different?

Basically, I am uncomfortable no matter what - that's just me!:lol:

Lunula, I've been there with the family thing too. I went on my first diet when I was 12 (to go from, get this, 121 lbs to 110! oh my goodness!) and for years was held up as the diet queen (even though my weight crept back up into the 130s/40s) - and oh my when I put on a bunch of weight after child # 2, the Looks I got - the hints - the hysterics! Ugh....

Lidian

I want to be able to fit into single digit sizes on a CONSISTENT basis, not just when I'm having a "good body day".

S. :)

Ladies -- those are all wonderful wishes that I share. I can honestly say that everything that's been mentioned I was nodding my head at.

Shanara -- it just about broke my heart when I read the bit about your co-workers. People are such &%#@!! sometimes! Maybe you can see it as a blessing in disguise: it tells you who really are your friends, right? Sooner or later, that sort of behavior will come back and bite them in the arse. Jerks.

******

As for my list of things that I am looking forward to in particular:
* Being able to wear Levi's corduroys again (I used to get these in thrift shops all the time -- they were so comfy and super-cool looking! I miss them!)
* Having my BF be able to pick me up! Or sit in his lap. :)
* Not having fat fingers -- this really bothers me.
* No double chin!
* No back rolls, or any other kind
* Not explaining myself to people I haven't seen since I've gained so much weight. Someone else mentioned something similar to this. I just have this uncontrolllable urge to tell people, "Yes, I've gained lots of weight since you saw me last." Or even telling them over the phone to "prepare" them! God!
* ABSOLUTELY to shop in any store I want to.

Of course this list could go on ad infinitum, but everyone's got the topic covered pretty darned well.

We can get what we want!

Just once in my life, I would like to take a belly dancing class :lol:

I want a pair of knee high soft leather fitted boots- the darned things never zip up over my calves :mad:

Right now, I just want to be able to pull my size 36 jeans over my fat thighs. :mad:
What I'd REALLY like is to be able to give away all of my fat clothes to some poor sod who's trying to lose weight.