1) Having two close relatives die of heart- and weight-related diseases or complications in the past year. Genetics are not on my side, sadly.

2) Realizing that everything in my life -- my job, my relationship, my hobbies, my family -- is going well except for my health. I'm not ill per se, but my general energy level is low and I don't sleep well.

3) Always being included in the "big girl" group by my roller derby coach when we're discussing strategy. I'm only 5'2". I should not be playing with the 6-foot Amazons.

4) Never going shopping with friends anymore because I have to buy most of my clothes from plus size young women's stores like Avenue and Torrid.

5) Realizing that I have trained myself to avoid mirrors because I hate what I see so much.

Being tired of missing out on so many things and hiding myself away, wasting my life.
My ex-boyfriend is still a good friend and lives quite far away from me, and when we met up recently I wasn't able to get my seat belt done up in his car. We moved the seat, he was pulling on the belt and it just wouldn't fit, and I wanted to die, I felt so humiliated. That same day we had to go up 6 big flights of stairs (?!) where we were staying and I had to keep stopping because I couldn't breathe. He was trying to be nice and wait for me but I wanted him to carry on without me and not see me like that. It was too much humiliation for one day. He now has a new girlfriend, (who is thin and very outgoing), and I felt too disgusted and ashamed of myself to see her.
I either shut myself away at home, or I make myself go out and do things and there is always something to make me wish I hadn't gone, like someone shouting something at me or that I find myself struggling to keep up with friends. This has been the final straw for me. I am done with feeling this way. I want to feel better about myself and be able to hold my head up high, for me.

Stepping on a scale and weighing 2lbs less then I did when I was full term pregnant :( I was up to 193! It was bad :(

I've always been big; but I always had a flat stomach. Now I have this belly that's just limiting me. It's starting to hang over a bit and I just couldn't take it anymore. My profile doesn't look the way it should. The thickening of my neck and then I started noticing a double chin thing developing. My "fat" pants are too small. It's a lot of things. Things that I shouldn't have ignored until it was this bad.

My parents have fought their weight their whole lives. I won't let that be me. I won't be limited by my size.

Clothes shopping - wanting all these kinds of clothes from Gap, Old Navy, etc and even though they go up to size XXL or 18 or 20, I can't fit into them. I'm only 22 and most plus size stores have clothes appropriate for women in their thirties or older, and Torrid, the ONE store that 'cater's to girls my age has poor quality and awful options lately. I'm tired of having 4 stores to pick from and not wanting clothes from any of them.

Thinking about the future - my boyfriend started gaining weight once we started dating and it hurts to feel like it was me that brought it on. Along with those goes with not wanting to be a fat bride. I watch a lot of shows like Say Yes to the Dress, and the selection of plus size gowns is really really limited. I don't want to look at pictures of my wedding years down the road with the same regret that I have when looking at my high school and college graduation pictures now.

Those were the big two. There are more lesser reasons that are like icing on the cake. I also like the feeling of empowerment - being fat for as long as I can remember, I like not letting my body and my fat control me anymore!

For me it was mostly hitting 244 (my current weight, I'm just getting started on this journey). When I looked at the scale and realized that I would very soon weigh 250 pounds, it became very real how overweight, well actually obese I had become. I couldn't get by just not looking at my full body in the mirror anymore. I took a picture of myself just standing there and saw myself, as I really was. And I couldn't believe it. And I realized I had to change what I had become. That the few seconds of supposed joy I feel when eating this or drinking that are not worth looking or feeling like this. And the cravings I've felt have at least for the moment gone. I realize they'll pop in from time to time, but I know that I'm in this for the long haul and that I'm done with abusing my body and myself this way. I know I'm going to slip up and I know some days I'll struggle. But I will not give up.

Originally Posted by DigitalSinner:
Realizing that the person in those pictures my doucheface friends like to tag all the time on Facebook was me. FAT!!!!

^^This. The last pics that have been posted of me look good cause I'm thinner a little and can wear great makeup now, but I still won't turn off privacy cause you can see all my old ugly fat photos. No more of that ****!

I also have had more than one last straw. I have had several that all of you had mentioned about but one of the big ones that hit home was the fact that it looks like I have back boobs. I am also tired of finding the cute outfit that you love and adore and it doesn't come in your size or if it does it costs extra. I didn't recognize myself in the photos since I never saw myself as "that big" and then looking down to see a fat shadow. NEVER AGAIN.

going shopping with the non fat friends. and they complain that theyre fat. and nothing fits them. and blah blah. one of my friends is only 130-135 and complains alllllll the time about being fat.

im on colorguard at my university. which involves lycra uniforms. we just bought new ones and i helped pick them out so they are flubb friendly but they are still sleeveles on one side. which brings on the thing i hate most about myself. the elbow fat overhang. when i first realized how fat my upper arms were i cried. i have back fat. i cant find a bra that can hide or hold it on. shirts and cute tops look ok from the front, its just those extra rolls in the back.

and the biggest thing, that just happened today actually, was seeing a picture of the girl my ex boyfriends (who i am still completley in love with) is sleeping with and seeing how much of a size difference we are. im still crying. (that and like i saidim still in love with him. thats a whole nother story :( )

being completley depressed and bored outta my mind i had two options. sit around and be miserable and sleep all day (which i had been doing) or get up and do something about it. walking is a start. i zumba too but i get so winded and have side cramps but im determined to get through a class nonstop)

that and i used to be a 12/14 in AE and could get my jeans in the store. now i have to order an 18 offline b/c they dont carry anything bigger than a 14 in my area stores.and now the 18s are getting tight....:(

Mine are:

The Facebook thing, a little different than everyone else's... there are NO photos of me on FB as fat, because I don't let anyone take photos these days. But seeing how I looked as a slender person for years and years made me realize how ashamed I am of the weight gain. I looked great, and I'd like to look that way again.

My boyfriend left a few months ago. It wasn't because of my weight but because of deep, intrinsic philosophical differences between us that could not be overcome. Though we had discussed these differences at length during our courtship and he had assured me they would not present a problem for him, it seems he was wrong. I miss him very much. I'm trying to move on, and it occurred to me that the ONLY thing holding me back was my weight. And I thought, WHY am I not doing something about the one thing that keeps me from taking on life as I once did? I realized that my weight was a consideration in nearly everything I did -- or didn't do. That really was the last straw.

The fact that it's my last year of University here in Lancaster, and I'm constantly de-tagging myself on Facebook and refusing to have pictures taken with the friends that I'm going to miss so badly because I can't bare to look at pictures of myself. I don't think I'm even going to be able to bring myself to get a photo taken at graduation.

My moment was during a night out with friends. It was Christmas time, and I was wasted drunk. Because of a snow storm ( 2 cm England style) no cabs were operating. We had to walk back to our place. It was a 2 hour walk. I was so exhausted from it. I could barely breathe and I was walking. I'm a freaking Uni student, I'm too old to not be able to walk. All my friends were able to walk properly and didn't need breaks. I felt that burning feeling at my sides from simply walking. It was mortifying. I just knew this was no way to live. I couldn't operate like this anymore.

I don't think I had a single moment. My weight has always been a problem. In fact everything in my life is ace right now except for that and it has been that way for awhile. I am college educated, a homeowner, married to the woman of my dreams and the only thing that isn't awesome is my weight.

This year I had two uncles who are both diabetics go on dialysis. And I started working as an RN in a dialysis center and it was really eye opening and I finally made the connection between poor self-care, morbid obesity, diabetes, and kidney failure. I do not want to be in that situation. Ever.

So this time it is motivated by health and not vanity and maybe that is the difference.

It really is in the little things. Like the fact that I have to extend my jeans waistband with an elastic because some little sadist fashionista jean maker decided to build a size 16 like it's a 13...grr.

Or that I'm 16 with high blood pressure and walking up a flight of stairs is harder than it should be.

Or that I too discovered that I have side boobs!

Or that I've got numerous stretch marks on my belly that literally appeared overnight..not kidding.

Or that, most importantly, I need to get healthy now instead of later, before I get older and it becomes tons harder.

My final point was meeting someone I really like online and realizing I am afraid to meet them in person due to my weight.

For me it was when my (now ex-) husband asked me for a divorce. I realized I was about to be alone and I didn't want to face that combined with being fat.

For me, it was seeing everybody else enjoying life when all I could do was dream of being somebody completely different than myself. I'm not the type of obese person who just became obese through time. I literally was always obese. I never experience anything a normal girl experience. I have an imaginary 'perfect' version of myself that I always dream about. I'm so sick of dreaming... I want to live!

And than seeing my brother (who I really don't like due to something completely off-topic) losing 40lbs and being thinner than I am and my cousin (who I also don't like) being thin himself... I just couldn't take it anymore.

I also realized that I have type 2 diabetes. I've been diabetic for a loooonng time... Probably before I was in 2nd grade (I was obese then too). I just didn't realize it because I was too busy dreaming! Because of my obesity, I have a lot of ugly side effects. One of them is acanthosis nigrican.

So many things.

-Being 'outed' as fat online. You know, tagged in FB pictures and all that crap. I hate it. I look like an inhuman lardbased gorgon in photographs.

-Got on the scale one day and it said 328. I promised myself for a long time I would never go above 300. And I did without knowing it somehow. Kicked me right in the butt.

-I didn't have a neck. I wanted a neck very suddenly.

-Hearing my knees crackle, being in pain going up and down stairs, numbness in my thighs when standing too long, fatigue. It all added up one day. I felt a million years old.

-Discovering Sparkpeople.com

This picture: http://i.imgur.com/bktXR.jpg "Oh holy crap, I'm fat and there's a bright flash. HURRY, LOOK FATTER AND BRAIN DAMAGED"

There are a few " straws " for me:

1. My parents treat my meth-addict sister better than me because they can't see what she is smoking or injecting but they see me stuffing food in my mouth. They compare me to her because she's thin - of course she's thin.. she's been on crack/meth and whatever drugs for over 20 years. Being called to my parent's room to just hear them say... " hello whale".
It seems like an issue for younger people but I have to deal with it at 38 years old.

2. Hard to admit but I have isolated myself from all my friends, except online ones because they can't see me. My best friend since kindergarten was always fat like me... but she could afford bariatric surgery. In a few months she lost over 100lbs and did the skin surgery. Life really did change for her. She was so happy. She was still the same friend to be but I chose to stay away. I lost my security blanket. It was fine if we were both fat but I could not bear the thought of being the only fat one in our peer group.

3. When I felt that fatness had taken over my life and living within these walls of my condominium hiding from everyone because I feel like I am being judged is not how I was meant to live my life. I always masked the pain of being insecure by being materialistic : I always had the new phone/tech stuff... always had the new designer bag... always wore expensive watches and jewelry but... it doesn't mean anything really when I don't feel comfortable with myself, when I start hating myself for what I have become.

4. I met and fell in love with a man who accepts me for who I am. Who sees me with his heart and not just his eyes. We want to get married and have a family. There is nothing I want more than to have a child with him.
I need to be healthy for that. I can't get pregnant because my obesity has caused me to have hormonal imbalance. I am currently under medication for it but my doctor says... lose weight then we can talk about pregnancy.

The fact that some of my favourite clothes don't fit anymore.

Having to find bigger sizes in shops that I used to.

Dreading seeing pictures of myself from nights out :(

I can't wait to be back to my old size. It'll be like Christmas with all the clothes I can wear again! :-p

There were several straws for me.
The first was when my mom got diagnosed with heart failre and had surgery at 41. She was also diagnosed with diabetes all at the same time. None of which had to do with her weight out was because she was diabetic for about 3 years and it attacked her heart:(. Realizing that on top of my daddy dying when I was 11 from a heart attack made me realize that I was not given good odds and if I didn't get my health better NOW that I was next.

Next was stepping on the scale for the first time in a year and realizing I was 300 pounds. I had developed back fat beyond belief I was out of shape. it was like seeing myself for the first time and it made me sick.

So, I decided to stop talking and do something about it!!!

It was a cumulation of things for me;

- Realizing I'm almost 26, that's almost 30... and after 30 there just isnt a way back to health as easily anymore (sure, it's not such a big disaster - but it felt like now would be the best time if ever)
- Actually feeling the fat on my thighs get icky in the heat
- The scale moving beyond the 70KG which has been my max ever
- Starting to turn into the self-concious almost social anxious girl that I was when I was 18 again... that freaked me out massively! I came such a long way from there - and now my weight was making me all insecure all over again.
- Noticing people wouldn't tell me I was being silly when I make the umpteenth remark about my big butt.

So yeh, it all came together a month before my 26th birthday.

The "big moment" or "eye-opening moment" for me was when I went up another size. I'd stayed a certain size for several years, and I finally now just passed that size. I can't allows myself to gain anymore weight and more than anything I need to lose quite a bit.

Photo's. Similar to everyone else on here. Seeing them on people's face book and seeing my face and butt compared to my friends in photos. The big one though, suddenly not having any pants because NONE of the ones you own will zip anymore. That morning of discovery was horrid... and I refused to go shopping for new pants in a bigger size. I just threw on a pair and wore an extra baggy shirt from an ex boyfriend and didn't button them. Embarrassing day. No one noticed, but I felt like the world knew.

I can now fit back into most my jeans...

Backing out of a planned trip because I'd have to walk so far and it was so hot and I was so fat and going to be sooo sweaty and tired and dragging. That shamed me.

Seeing pictures of me from my 10 year class reunion (thankfully they weren't tagged for the world to see!). I really didn't know I looked like that.

Not wanting to move around or play with my littles because I'm so large.

Having 3 pairs of pants to wear.

Edging closer and closer to 200 pounds.

Etc, etc, etc.

I'm just miserable and I'm tired of it!

There were several things, and it spanned over a few years, it wasn't just a moment for me. I believe I was always unhappy with my weight and how I looked but tried so desperately to dress "normally" and somewhat fahionably cause I LOVE clothes and feeling sexy in them. Plus I was depressed while in my marriage. Once I came out of the marriage I started to lose weight as I started to eat at home more and choose healthier choices. I didn't do it to lose weight I did it cause I was going through court and couldn't afford to go out! Once that was done I realized I had lost about 25lbs withouth any exercise just eating habit so I figured I could just keep doing that. Which didn't work, I just plateaued. So I kept trying to lose with diet and started slim fast, but no nothing budged. I knew I had to do exercise.......it's what I have been putting off. Being a single mother of 2 and a career woman, it's HARD, but I used that as my excuse. So I started off slow. I don't know what triggered me, but I knew for a good 2 months the scale wasn't moving while I was doing slim fast. I was getting ticked so I started off low impact, took breaks for water and just kept going. I forgot how good exercise felt! I really did! I am realizing that I need to find my balance between food, exercise and taking care of me. Including going to bed at decent time. So it's been a gradual change for me, not just 1 moment when I said "that's it, I'm doing it" I tried everything else and saw no results so by process of elimination I'm here. LOL

Well like a lot of you here, there's been a few "straws".....

1. My husband weighing at least 60 lbs less than me, and yes you read that right.....at LEAST 60 lbs LESS than me....."Here comes the bride,all fat and wide. Here comes the groom an as skinny as a broom."
2.I weigh more now then I did when I gave birth to my last child.....that and I still look pregnant....I had her almost 3 years ago.
3.Realizing that over time that slowly I own no clothes, ironically I wear my skinny a** husbands oversized tshirts...they don't reflect who I am as a person at all. And I've lost some part of my identity by not being able express myself through wearing my own **** clothing!
4.I don't feel feminine anymore. That makes me so sad.I used to love to do my makeup and hair.....now I just don't see the point. You can put lipstick on a pig but its still a pig.
5.I don't feel sexy....at all. My poor husband can't understand.
6. I'm ashamed of myself , sincerely ashamed. I have so many qualities I'm proud of but the shame hides them all.

Truthfully it was vanity at first. I have really nice clothes and they no longer fit:o

Then when I went for my work physical I was heavier then I had EVER been (not including pregnancies) I was just disgusted with what I had done to myself.

So I'm taking my time and going to get healthy and get back in my clothes:carrot:

Yes, yes and yes.

1. I don't own a full length mirror. My 20 year old daughter has one on the back of her bedroom door, but I rarely venture in to see what I look like. Just have the bathroom mirror for washing my face/contacts/brushing & flossing. I have always had large breasts so if I can't see anything "sticking out" past them, I tend to delude myself that I'm not as big as I am. Facebook has been a bit of a slap in the face. I do detag the especially heinous ones.

2. Realizing how big my upper arms are. And oh me, oh my, the back fat.

3. I just got home two weeks ago from a family reunion with 79 other family members, a cousin's husband, my sister and I were the only heavy people there.

4. It really sank in that I weigh 30 pounds MORE than I did when I gave birth (I weighed 154 at delivery for all three kids).

5. I'm tired of sitting on the sidelines waiting for life to "happen."

I am super lucky that I have been married to the best guy ever, who has always told me I'm beautiful, no matter what size I was/am. But I don't feel pretty anymore. It's time to get the pretty back!

Originally Posted by MidlifeCrisisGirl:
Yes, yes and yes.

1. I don't own a full length mirror. My 20 year old daughter has one on the back of her bedroom door, but I rarely venture in to see what I look like. Just have the bathroom mirror for washing my face/contacts/brushing & flossing. I have always had large breasts so if I can't see anything "sticking out" past them, I tend to delude myself that I'm not as big as I am. Facebook has been a bit of a slap in the face. I do detag the especially heinous ones.

2. Realizing how big my upper arms are. And oh me, oh my, the back fat.

3. I just got home two weeks ago from a family reunion with 79 other family members, a cousin's husband, my sister and I were the only heavy people there.

4. It really sank in that I weigh 30 pounds MORE than I did when I gave birth (I weighed 154 at delivery for all three kids).

5. I'm tired of sitting on the sidelines waiting for life to "happen."

I am super lucky that I have been married to the best guy ever, who has always told me I'm beautiful, no matter what size I was/am. But I don't feel pretty anymore. It's time to get the pretty back!

My hubby is a gorgeous man (a little extra weight but serious eye candy) and thank you Jesus he loves me despite my size. I barely weight less than he does. I will NOT tell him how much I weigh. The shame of it is huge! I'm the smallest woman in my family on both sides which scares me!!! I'm 190 lbs (which no one believes I guess I have more muscle than fat to that I say WHATEV!) 6 lbs less than when I delived #4 18 months ago. It took me a YEAR to lose 6 pounds. I tried every day, diet being active all to lose 6 lbs. (I blame my IUD) So, I gave up, weight stayed the same but my feelings never got better.

My Moment: I have two special needs children and they dont get why Mommys belly is big and the babys out and walking! :sorry: I know they dont get it or mean it, what they're saying is really "Mommy why are you fat and shouldnt be". But ****it IT HURTS!

Lots of things led me to hate the way I look, and want to be thinner.

1. I realized nobody complimented me since I got married 4 years ago. (I gained about 40 lbs after that, and I was on a curvier side of "avg" before) When I was younger, I had a very striking look; Not to say I was the most gorgeous or even very photogenic, but people stared and had something nice to say wherever I went so much that I was used to it. Now, I am a ginger hiding inside a fat suit, looking like every other person that graces walmartpeople.com lol. When people see old photos of me they go WOW YOU DON'T EVEN LOOK LIKE THAT, YOU'RE SO PRETTY IN THIS PIC. Ouch.

2. I have an aunt who looks like humpty dumpty. Literally, round and short, so egg shaped. Love her to death, but she has bug eyes a la rodney dangerfield, hair so thin you can see her scalp clear as day, and when she sits down, less than two inches of her upper leg (to knee) is visible because her belly covers the rest. Two of her friends were recently teasing her that she looked like the ice age squirrel, scrat, good naturedly though. Their preschool aged child looked at them disapproving and said "That's not very nice. It's true, but not nice."

Every time her friends would meet me, they would lose it over how much we looked alike. Strangers who meet us together assume I am her daughter and when their assumption is proven wrong, they rave about how we look so much alike. REALLY PEOPLE???? If you see a young woman who is a dead ringer for Steve Buscemi, do not tell her that for the love of god. It is not a compliment, it is heartbreaking.

3. I have a hump. It's like my body ran out of fat storage and just had to give me an extra curve somewhere. I have what amounts to a breast, this little pad of fat, where my spin begins to curve atop my shoulder blades. I could probably sit a drink on it and move through a crowd with little or no spillage. Sexy.

I've lost... lessee... 215 to 192... but it's been a very slow process. Back again for another round (: One thing is for sure though, without being so large now, I'd have grown up so stuck up and full of myself. Now I don't take myself so seriously and it's done me a world of good. Laugh or you'll cry, right?

My moment was when I was making out with a guy.
I took my shirt off, andhe were kissing and all that stuff.
He asked me something I don't remember.
I asked him, "Do you think I am pretty?"
His answer was, "Yeah, I like heavyset chicks."
Never. Never again will I make out with a guy and have him tell me that.
I don't think I can make out with guys until I lose weight.
The whole time I will be thinking, 'Hmm..Does HE also think I am heavyset?'
That is such an ugly word.

I was really unhappy with my weight, but I let it be until I saw the doctor for a blood test, and he told me I was 'pre-diabetic'. I lost weight and became more comfortable with myself, until an ex buddy of mine decided he'd call me a fat ho, because I didn't return his affection. I became aware of my weight again. Not long after, I started living with my bf, and I've noticed my eating habbits have become terrible. So I'm striving to eat healthier and lose another 25lbs.

Originally Posted by tif8j:
I asked him, "Do you think I am pretty?"
His answer was, "Yeah, I like heavyset chicks."

I know what that's like. I had an ex who used to tell me how much he loved "big curvy girls", and even though he was trying to make me feel better about myself, I felt terrible every time he said it.

You guys...I just read through this whole thread. I laughed, I cried, but mostly, I identified.

I have been bouncing back and forth for years, lately it's been mostly forth.

I went to a doctor appointment and realized I had gained 20 lbs in 6 months and was now heavier than I have ever been before.

I realized that I think about how fat I am CONSTANTLY- it affects me in EVERY way- what I wear, what I am willing to go out and do, how I interact with people, how I feel, what I think about...It would literally take me LESS effort to just DO something about it than to let it control my life...and I wonder what amazing things I can accomplish with this weight not constantly...well...weighing on me!

Also, the thing that finally hit me last night (like a ton of bricks) is that this isn't just for me. My husband has gained 70 lbs since we got married and he is dangerously heavy. Last night he looked at me and said, "I am going to have a heart attack soon. I just can feel it." It made me hysterical. We're not even 30 yet. I am not going to let something as dumb as food and laziness kill my soulmate or shorten the time we have together. We have to do this now, we have to do this together, and we have to do this for real.

Originally Posted by DezziePS:
You guys...I just read through this whole thread. I laughed, I cried, but mostly, I identified.

I have been bouncing back and forth for years, lately it's been mostly forth.

I went to a doctor appointment and realized I had gained 20 lbs in 6 months and was now heavier than I have ever been before.

I realized that I think about how fat I am CONSTANTLY- it affects me in EVERY way- what I wear, what I am willing to go out and do, how I interact with people, how I feel, what I think about...It would literally take me LESS effort to just DO something about it than to let it control my life...and I wonder what amazing things I can accomplish with this weight not constantly...well...weighing on me!

Also, the thing that finally hit me last night (like a ton of bricks) is that this isn't just for me. My husband has gained 70 lbs since we got married and he is dangerously heavy. Last night he looked at me and said, "I am going to have a heart attack soon. I just can feel it." It made me hysterical. We're not even 30 yet. I am not going to let something as dumb as food and laziness kill my soulmate or shorten the time we have together. We have to do this now, we have to do this together, and we have to do this for real.

:congrat: Bless you both! I hope he listens to his body. You can both be great support to each other.

Last straw this time........

I was getting too close to the 200# mark and I was tired of seeing all the excess rolls around my stomach area....and I am tired of hurting when I go up and down my front door steps. There are only 3 steps!

I had a couple of moments although I don't know if I would call them last straws. I have friends who love to post pictures on facebook. I cannot believe the unflattering pictures that are up there of me. It's gotten to the point that if someone pulls a camera out at a social event I will a) stick my hand up in front of myself - like don't take the picture or b) I will say unequivocally "do NOT put my picture on facebook!" I feel so awful whenever I look at them.

Also I needed new pants and it took me an entire day to find one pair that fit me ( I refused to go above a size 18). I would love to shop in stores that cater to smaller sizes not just "specialty" shops.

So many things I identify with in here!

In addition:

*Not really feeling excited and happy at the idea of attending a college friend's wedding

*Avoiding making dr. appointments because I KNOW

*Having the 40th birthday happen this year and reflecting on things I'd like to do: travel is a stressful idea and once upon a time I loved it

*Putting off a tattoo design getting inked because I didn't want to deal with it....now I'm hoping to get it done as a memento of success and valuing myself <3


:)

Originally Posted by Lucky72:
It's gotten to the point that if someone pulls a camera out at a social event I will a) stick my hand up in front of myself - like don't take the picture or b) I will say unequivocally "do NOT put my picture on facebook!" I feel so awful whenever I look at them.

Also I needed new pants and it took me an entire day to find one pair that fit me ( I refused to go above a size 18). I would love to shop in stores that cater to smaller sizes not just "specialty" shops.

im the same way. i always untag myself and tell them if they post pics of me they die. that and i can only get jeans from AE online because they dont carry that size in the stores (18) i used to be a 14 in AE jeans. i could actually go to the store and have choices. now its whatevers on sale online :/

I went to the eye doctor for a new prescription. No matter what she did, she couldn't get my left eye to 20/20. My first thought upon this wasn't worry about what it could be, nor was it that the doctor didn't know what she was doing; it was, "oh my God, I've given myself diabetes and messed up my eyes!"

Yeah. That was my thought at age 27. I realized that was no way to live.