Do you ever wonder if your destined to be overweight?
Do you ever wonder if your destined to be over weight? I hope I used the right word there. Do you ever feel like no matter what you do you gain weight instead of lose? Do you ever just feel like throwing in the towel and saying forget it? If you answered yes to any of this... what do you do to change this? How have you lost weight? TIA!
I think I was not really honest with myself for a long time about the quantity of food I actually ate, and I was very discouraged until I started measuring out my food and saw that I was actually eating much more than a serving of meat/fish/pasta/rice at my "healthy" dinners. Also, it helps to eat more whole foods and fruit and veggies. I do not have the time to fix a home-cooked (or home put-together) lunch, since I commute for over an hour each way to the office and I am involved in a collie rescue group (I use HC or LC Spa meals for lunches, and bring apples or pears and sometimes a few almonds for snacks), so I make sure that I drink plenty of water and I eat lots of veggies with dinner. And exercising was crucial to me getting this far. I weight train 2 - 3 times a week and do cardio 3 - 4 times a week, in addition to walking the doggies each day (although lately it has been very rainy and one dog is a little injured so the walks are not too long).
It has been slow - maybe a pound a week and I have been stuck hovering just about 170 for about a month now - but I much better off here than I was at 207! And my clothes are getting looser and looser. I was almost able to pull my dress slacks off yesterday w/o unbuttoning them (and the material has no stretch whatsoever).
Hang in there and be truly honest with yourself. You don't have to be totally honest with anyone else but yourself. I really wish you the best!
Hi again Tracy. I just saw this and felt like I just had to respond because I have definitely asked myself that question before. Sometimes on a daily basis. I have actually asked myself why me? Why did I have to be fat? I don't every remember growing up and being thin. I've been overweight since I first started school. I look back and wonder what the heck happened to me. Is it my parents fault. That they didn't tell me to stop eating. Maybe? I think the fact that we used to eat late at night was part of the problem. Lack of exercising. I think I just was a bit lazy. Well, that's the past and today is a new day and I need to focus on what I need to do.
I don't think I was meant to be fat. I just think I never really tried to do much about losing the weight. I would try here and there and just give up. Using the excuse. I was just meant to be fat. I even had someone tell me when I was younger, that I had a pretty face if I would just lose weight. What? HOW can you tell a kid that? I mean I was like , I'm ugly. Ok.. so how is losing weight going to make me prettier.
When people see my picture they don't think that I am overweight, but when I tell them they are like you are kidding you don't have a fat face. You are very pretty. See.. it's too confusing. Little : lose weight to be pretty. Older: You're too pretty.. you can't be fat.. your fat isn't..
Ok.. I'm getting away from the questions. I used to feel like I was destined to be fat/overweight but not anymore. I know if I try really hard and keep up with it that I can lose weight. I'll probably never be a size 2 but I really don't want to be either. If I got into to single digits, I would be happy. Heck anything under a size 16 and I'll be happy.
I am never going to throw in the towel. I am not going to let my weight get the better of me. I am not going to go down without a fight. And I know that I can win this battle. I just have to have the confidence, motivation, support and understanding. I know it isn't an easy battle but who the heck said war was fun or easy. It's grueling but I have the heart to committ to making myself a happier and healthier person if not for myself then for my kids. I want to see them grow up and I want to be able to get out there and play with them and I don't want them to be embarassed of me. I fear that they may get teased from their friends about me and I so don't want that.
I am accomplising my goal by having a better mind set this time around. I have a positive attitude of I can do it. It is going to take time but if I stick to it and never give up I can and will acheive my goals. Plus I am not looking at the big picture this time. I am not saying I am going to be 135 lb. I have mini goals this time around. Much easier to get to those then to the 135 that I want to be. It's also less discouraging for me too. Exercise, water and eating healthy, watching my portions is just the beginning. I hope to be able to get out there and actually run someday. And joining a gym is in my future too.
So I may be fat but I am not to going to stay that way. Striving to be a better and more fit me.
Thanks for your reply! I try to do HC meals for lunch too! It helps me to make sure I eat. And they are better then a peanut butter sandwich I am sure. I am not one to eat much by day. So that made it a bit easier that way. The good part for me is though that I do eat alot of veggies at my dinner meals! Most of my plate is brocolli or whatever the veggie is and a salad on the side most of the time. My potatoe portion is the smallest always on my plate.
I do WATP and some Denise Austin exercises. I admit, I have not done much of anything this since my blood tests. But I am hoping to get back to normal soon!
Collie rescue! I can imagine your days. You must be very busy. My heart would break doing that.. I would want to take them all home and keep them lol.
If I lost a pound a week I would be in seventh heaven. I keep gaining and gaining. Hopefully this will change.
Anyway, thanks so much for your post. I do appreciate it.
I'd always assumed I was destined to be fat, until now that is. I've been morbidly obese my entire life, and I honestly thought there was no hope for me. I never thought I could actually do it without some magic pill or going the WLS route (which I probably would have done if I'd had the money or insurance). I also thought about giving up lots of times during the weight loss, which is completely natural, I'm sure. I really don't know what made me think I could do it this time, something just "clicked" in me, as they say, and I did it. My whole way of thinking has completely changed, now I KNOW I can do it, and can continue it for the rest of my life.
Great question!! Yeah, I spent years -- decades, actually -- convinced being overweight was my fate. I know I've posted this story before, but I'll repeat it anyway...I remember very clearly at the age of 11 being told by my pediatrician that I needed to lose 20 lbs. I was 5'4" (already) and 140 lbs. (LOL...a VERY normal BMI, although I didn't know it at the time). And he told me to lose 20 lbs anyway, and sent me home to an anorexic Mom and compulsive-eating Dad who clearly had no concept of what "nutrition" was really all about. The doctor never told me how to do it, not even a basic sentence like "exercise and eat less." On the drive home with my Dad, I remember thinking, "I don't know how to lose 20 lbs! Well, I guess I'll just be fat for the rest of my life." I threw in the towel then and there, and I haven't weighed 140 lbs since . That was in 1983. (As I recall, we're the same age, right Tracy?)
How did I change my mindset? In the mid-1990s, I lost about 30 lbs -- I don't ever remember thinking "Can I do it?" it was more a matter of "I'm GONNA do it!" I'd just broken up with my boyfriend of 5 years and was getting back into dating etc., etc., etc. But then I let the weight creep back on over the years until I was up to 189 lbs on my 30th birthday.
And I guess something just clicked, like Beverly said. I knew I could lose the weight because I had done it before, and I DID NOT want to spend my 30s overweight -- so my 30th birthday present to myself was a personal trainer, and the rest (as they say) is history .
How have I lost the weight?
-- cardio 30 - 45 minutes, 3 days a week
-- weight training 30 minutes, 3 days a week
-- limiting carbs/fats
-- aiming for 90 - 100 grams of protein per day
-- no pizza, Doritos, or Ben & Jerry's
Last edited by LovesBassets; 10-13-2005 at 03:12 PM.
I have felt that way before but it was nothing but an excuse. The truth of the matter was that I wanted to be thin but I didn't want to do what was needed to lose weight. I can't exercise (I'm to busy, tired, etc.)really meant I don't want to exercise. I can't lose weight really meant that I didn't want to give up huge helpings.
And guess what? CAN'T NEVER COULD!
Losing weight isn't any different than everything else in our lives. If we say we can't we don't - in fact we usually don't even try. If we believe we can we will at least give it our best shot.
Are you weighing and measuring your foods? Because it doesn't really matter how much of your plate is covered in broccoli if, at the end of the day, you aren't burning more than you consumed. And there is a big difference between a level tablespoon and a heaping one. I know that when I finally bought a food scale I was very surprised to find out what REALLY constituted a "small" potato (or banana, or apple, or 3 oz of meat). Measuring and weighing is so critical for those of us who have been struggling with our weight. I know my judgement of a serving was skewed from years of overeating. Even cutting back from my usual portion sizes my helpings were bigger than they needed to be.
Are you careful about how you prepare your food? Salad isn't so diet friendly if it is covered in creamy dressings, bacon, and croutons. Vegetables aren't quite so healthy if they are soaked in butter. And even a small potato is a poor choice if it is drenched with sour cream.
I agree 100% with Marilyn. Nobody can lose weight and keep it off unless they are honest with themselves. If you can imagine it, at 214 pounds I would say things like, "But I really don't eat that much." I think that is one reason so many of us who are overweight are uncomfortable eating in front of other people. I can remember complaining about my weight and my sister saying that she never saw me eat. And that was good - it validated this excuse I'd made for myself that I was doing everything I could to lose weight and it just wasn't working. I didn't eat in front of people because I felt like if they didn't see me eat, they would believe I didn't eat, and they would think that my being fat wasn't my fault. And I DID NOT want it to be my fault.
In my opinion, if someone isn't losing weight and doctors do not find a medical reason for it then they flat out are lying to themselves about something. Maybe it is portion sizes, maybe it is the amount or intensity of their exercise, maybe it is how good their food choices are, maybe it is a little of everything. But, assuming they have educated themselves about healthy diets, then they aren't being honest with themselves. Period. And, you know, even if you do have a medical condition affecting your weight loss it is only going to make it more difficult not IMPOSSIBLE.
Both my grandparents suffered from Type II diabetes and they would swear they were following doctor's orders in terms of their diets. The problem was that if the doctor advised them to eat more fish and vegetables they'd eat fried catfish and greens cooked in bacon fat. So, "technically" they were doing as they were told. They both died of complications from the disease. It taught me that there are always consequences to not being honest with yourself.
Take a hard look at your diet. Count every single morsel that goes into your mouth (even just ONE potato chip has calories!) I will be willing to bet that you are either eating more than you think or that the calorie count is higher than you think. Just remember: calories in vs. calories out. You CAN do it!
WOW! That was an awesome post! Very uplifting and powerful! Gosh... you have such a marvelous (sp?) attitude! With that, success will surely follow!
I think if I kept such a positive attitude each day and looked at the smaller parts of this big picture like you do (smaller goals) I might have a chance at making a difference and seeing the change!
You have an awesome way with words! Your very inspiring! Thank you so much.
WOW you have been thru ****! And at such a young age!!! Unbelievable how cold doctors can be!! Sheesh, I can't get my childs doctor (yep.. same doctors that I see.... maybe I should take my kids elsewhre too!) to say there is a problem with my daughters weight and tell us how to do it either! My daughter is 10 years old and wearing a size 14 plus size jeans! I have a very hard time getting clothes for her. Anyway, some doctors can be off beat!
With your family situation and what you doc told you I am surprized you came out of it! I surely would have thought major depression or something of that sort. That is a lot for a young child to handle! And with your parents eating problems... sheesh, what were you supposed to do!
Man have you been thru it! And yes I think we are around the same age lol. I am 32.... will be 33 in April.... no I ain't pushing it hahaha.
I am so confused about the diabetes thing though. Some people tell me to eat 60 to 70 carbs. They don't say grams or % or anything. So I am left confused on that. I think I am just going to stick with good carbs, protiens, and still try and limit my fats though. Until I am told differently. My MIL is calling the ADA and other diabetes places to find out more info. for me. I don't have a house phone so she is making calls for me. She lives over an hour away... so I can't use her phone lol. I can't afford to go over my cell phone minutes so she is helping me out. Hopefully she gets info. soon.
Thanks so much for sharing your story with me! I sure appreciate it. I really think I can do this! I just have to try and keep a positive attitude and thoughts.
I have felt that way before but it was nothing but an excuse. The truth of the matter was that I wanted to be thin but I didn't want to do what was needed to lose weight. I can't exercise (I'm to busy, tired, etc.)really meant I don't want to exercise. I can't lose weight really meant that I didn't want to give up huge helpings.
And guess what? CAN'T NEVER COULD!
Losing weight isn't any different than everything else in our lives. If we say we can't we don't - in fact we usually don't even try. If we believe we can we will at least give it our best shot.
Great post (as usual ), Jawsmom!
I was thinking about this thread while on the elliptical at the gym today, and when I signed on again, there was your post. And it's interesting, because I'd been thinking about why in the years between "deciding to be fat forever" at the age of eleven and my 30th birthday, I basically did nothing about my weight (other than my successful diet in the 1990s). Literally, other than my current crusade, I've only tried to lose weight 2 other times in my entire life. I really never gave it a 100% TRY.
And I know a HUGE part of it is what you wrote, Jawsmom. I just didn't want to give up my favorite foods -- they were a "stress relief" for me, but I also just really, really like(d) to eat junk food. Period. And I am also essentially a very lazy person . So I didn't want to try.
I also think that another part of it was my Mom's anorexia. I spent my entire childhood seeing what extreme "dieting" could do to a person -- and to an entire family -- and I decided very early on that I didn't want to be like my mother. So I spent a lot of years extremely "anti-diet." I couldn't stand it when my college roommates started talking about calories, etc., etc. It just drove me bananas -- I absolutely couldn't stand it. And it wasn't because I was heavy (and not doing anything about it), it's more that the whole concept of losing weight had really negative connotations for me. So I rebelled against it.
So for me, my decision not to try for years and years was an odd mixture of my being very lazy, my loving junk food too much to give it up, and my resentment toward the fifteen year diet-from-**** that cast a pretty dark shadow over my entire childhood.
Last edited by LovesBassets; 10-13-2005 at 06:12 PM.
I just missed your post, Tracy, so it looks like I responded to Jawsmom and ignored you! Whoops!
And LOL,...yeah...well, major depression DID become a part of my childhood -- whether due to my environment or not, I dunno. And oddly, my mother's eating disorder "never came up" in therapy until I was about 17 years old -- and then it only came up because I was late for my appointment due to an ambulance blocking our driveway. The ambulance, of course, being there to cart my Mom away because she'd passed out cold again. Weighing 95 lbs and living on only tofu for a month will do that to a person .
BUT ANYWAY (enough of my ranting)...I was diagnosed Bipolar II about 8 years ago (completely genetic as both sides of my biological family have mood disorders), and have been on meds every since.
I wish I could give you advice on what to eat for the diabetes thing, but I have no experience with it. LOL, other than all the diabetic Daschunds I see at work -- but I think they're probably/hopefully on a slightly different diet than you are!
You CAN DO THIS, TRACY!!!!! I know you can! And the important thing is that YOU KNOW YOU CAN!!
Last edited by LovesBassets; 10-13-2005 at 06:16 PM.
I have felt that way before but it was nothing but an excuse. The truth of the matter was that I wanted to be thin but I didn't want to do what was needed to lose weight. I can't exercise (I'm to busy, tired, etc.)really meant I don't want to exercise. I can't lose weight really meant that I didn't want to give up huge helpings.
And guess what? CAN'T NEVER COULD!
Losing weight isn't any different than everything else in our lives. If we say we can't we don't - in fact we usually don't even try. If we believe we can we will at least give it our best shot.
Are you weighing and measuring your foods? Because it doesn't really matter how much of your plate is covered in broccoli if, at the end of the day, you aren't burning more than you consumed. And there is a big difference between a level tablespoon and a heaping one. I know that when I finally bought a food scale I was very surprised to find out what REALLY constituted a "small" potato (or banana, or apple, or 3 oz of meat). Measuring and weighing is so critical for those of us who have been struggling with our weight. I know my judgement of a serving was skewed from years of overeating. Even cutting back from my usual portion sizes my helpings were bigger than they needed to be.
I measure everything. I use the WW measuring tools... it makes everything level. As for weighing... sometimes I do this as well... but I need to get a new scale. Mine is kind of dead. I also try to go by the portion sizes I found on WW and other places so I can compair what each size looks like.
Quote:
Originally Posted by jawsmom
Are you careful about how you prepare your food? Salad isn't so diet friendly if it is covered in creamy dressings, bacon, and croutons. Vegetables aren't quite so healthy if they are soaked in butter. And even a small potato is a poor choice if it is drenched with sour cream.
I admit, my salad dressing is not great.. it is french... but that is all that I like. I measure out 1 tbs. sometimes 2 at the most. But that is it. I can't eat croutons or bacon bits or anything like that. I only top my veggies with mild cheese and dressing. As for butter... I am learning on this!! I try not to use it much.. mostly sprays now. Or the cooking sprays I use now too.
Quote:
Originally Posted by jawsmom
I agree 100% with Marilyn. Nobody can lose weight and keep it off unless they are honest with themselves. If you can imagine it, at 214 pounds I would say things like, "But I really don't eat that much." I think that is one reason so many of us who are overweight are uncomfortable eating in front of other people. I can remember complaining about my weight and my sister saying that she never saw me eat. And that was good - it validated this excuse I'd made for myself that I was doing everything I could to lose weight and it just wasn't working. I didn't eat in front of people because I felt like if they didn't see me eat, they would believe I didn't eat, and they would think that my being fat wasn't my fault. And I DID NOT want it to be my fault.
I have been told that sometimes I just try to hard. I am honest about what I eat and my exercise and everything. It would be just cheating myself if not. However, sometimes it just seems hard to do much. Plus, I am one that forgets to eat!! I really don't eat by day. I have to force myself to eat before dinner time. And that can cause problems too sometimes. I am working on this daily though!
Quote:
Originally Posted by jawsmom
In my opinion, if someone isn't losing weight and doctors do not find a medical reason for it then they flat out are lying to themselves about something. Maybe it is portion sizes, maybe it is the amount or intensity of their exercise, maybe it is how good their food choices are, maybe it is a little of everything. But, assuming they have educated themselves about healthy diets, then they aren't being honest with themselves. Period. And, you know, even if you do have a medical condition affecting your weight loss it is only going to make it more difficult not IMPOSSIBLE.
Both my grandparents suffered from Type II diabetes and they would swear they were following doctor's orders in terms of their diets. The problem was that if the doctor advised them to eat more fish and vegetables they'd eat fried catfish and greens cooked in bacon fat. So, "technically" they were doing as they were told. They both died of complications from the disease. It taught me that there are always consequences to not being honest with yourself.
Take a hard look at your diet. Count every single morsel that goes into your mouth (even just ONE potato chip has calories!) I will be willing to bet that you are either eating more than you think or that the calorie count is higher than you think. Just remember: calories in vs. calories out. You CAN do it!
Lately my issue is there is not much calories in at all! I have not been eating hardly at all. But I am doing WW which helped me to eat more and better before. So hopefully it will do this again.
Some people have to relearn everything because they were raised differently and taught different. And some peoples finances does not allow for healthy choices all of the time. So lying I do not beleive is always the answer for not having successful weight loss. I have read that stress can cause weight gain and lack of weight loss as well. There are many things that could prevent weight loss and/or cause weight gain. Sometimes moderation is a good key when you can't have the healthier choices. I have learned that.
I totally understand where your coming from. Don't get me wrong. But I feel strongly that there are so many different things that could cause weight gain and/or lack of weight loss. And some things even go undetected for awhile. And yes, learning to eat better choices (baked fish instead of fried) does also make a difference! I totally agree!
Your to awesome! I CAN do it and I WILL do it! I just need to take baby steps, set smaller goals and remember them instead of the ultimate goal!, keep smiling, stay positive and eat more by day within the WW points!
I don't know how you ended up so positive with your up bringing. I applaud your positive attitude!! I am telling you (in a nice way not trying to come across as ignorant or rude) if you can get thru all of that and come out so positive and succeeding so can I!! Your a doll! Thanks again so much for your story.
I just need to take baby steps, set smaller goals and remember them instead of the ultimate goal!
EXACTLY!!!! Baby steps ALL THE WAY, ah...baby! Every little teeny-tiny thing you do -- or DON'T do -- adds up in the end. I find that if I look at the big picture I just get totally demoralized. One pound at a time -- or if you're me -- one half pound at a time . Cuz I lose very s...l...o...w...l...y.
BTW, I'm 33. I thought we were around the same age .
Last edited by LovesBassets; 10-13-2005 at 06:25 PM.
Reason: I'm having "quote" issues :-)
Do you ever wonder if your destined to be overweight?
Hi again Tracy. I just saw this and felt like I just had to respond because I have definitely asked myself that question before. Sometimes on a daily basis. I have actually asked myself why me? Why did I have to be fat? I don't every remember growing up and being thin. I've been overweight since I first started school. I look back and wonder what the heck happened to me. Is it my parents fault. That they didn't tell me to stop eating. Maybe? I think the fact that we used to eat late at night was part of the problem. Lack of exercising. I think I just was a bit lazy. Well, that's the past and today is a new day and I need to focus on what I need to do.
I am not one to eat much by day. So that made it a bit easier that way. The good part for me is though that I do eat alot of veggies at my dinner meals! Most of my plate is brocolli or whatever the veggie is and a salad on the side most of the time. My potatoe portion is the smallest always on my plate. 
. That was in 1983. (As I recall, we're the same age, right Tracy?)
), Jawsmom!
.