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Well I promised myself I would talk to the counselor today to ask her what exactly counseling involves, and to make sure it wasn't just a case of me talking for an hour and nothing else. But she got me talking again, and then all of a sudden she goes, ooh time has flown hasn't it, let's make another appt for a couple of weeks time. I didn't have chance to talk about anything else with her. So I will have to make sure that before I get into yapping next time I ask her the questions right at the start.
As for the session today, it didn't upset me as much as it did last time, I just had a good vent about my ex and what marriage was like with him, and how my daughter from that marriage is playing me up etc. It did feel good to have a good moan about it all, even though I have told other people about it. A new set of ears is always a good thing I guess lol.
I'm glad you went again, too ! I hope things continue to go well with her! I would have posted earlier, but somehow I missed this thread -- I'm spacey sometimes -- but I've been thinking about you even if I don't spot thread titles (and don't reply) until a week later!!
Next time you go, make a list of your questions and carry it in with you. That way, you'll be able to say right off "I have some questions here", and it will be easier for you to focus on them.
Olivia - thanks so much for that suggestion. I will write a list, but I don't know, I am scared of asking her, don't ask me why?
Kate and Leenie - thanks to you both for your replies. I am glad I had a better time of it at the second session, I wonder how my third session will go?
I read your other post and wanted to say that I felt the same way after my first session. Wanted some guidance during the hour, some answers. I didn't go back after the first visit. Then a month later things were a little worse and so I called her and set up an appointment. Haven't missed a week since, except for a vacation she took and I just about went nuts from not having our visit.
I also babble during the hour and for a long time felt that I wasn't accomplishing anything due to the babbling. I have since learned that when I babble the deeper things come to the surface, and once in a while when I try to avoid a topic I've touched on, she will bring me back to it to address it.
I also learned that she wasn't there to give me answers or advice. She was there to lead me to the answers I already had.
As a child I had a wonderful counselor who was an important key in who I am today. Without her I don't think I would have the strength that I have.
I'm so glad I went back and even more glad that you went back. Relax and babble away. You'll realize soon what a load it takes off.
Agreed scrunchkin! It's amazing what comes out of your mouth when you spend some time babbling...there's lots of stuff you didn't really realize was important, and the counselor's job is to pick those out. My most productive babbles have been when I'm with her for more than an hour...THAT'S when the really "good stuff" comes out. Unfortunately I have crappy insurance and 90-minute sessions are pretty expensive .
Also, one of the most "productive" sessions I ever had was when I brought my dog with me. It was amazing how much more I opened up with her lying at my feet .
I went into psych. therapy kicking & screaming with resistance...I babbled 3X a week, for months on end, now i realized how badly i NEEDED to vent/rant/rave with someone who was completely objective and non-judgemental. I slowly came to realize that I was learning better choices and influences in my life. I still resist the practical, but I mull everything over and come around when my head is *ready*......I have extreme difficulty with my adult daughter and I used to absolutely obsess over it until I made myself sick, thinking I was a "bad mother". Now I know not to keep blaming myself, she must take responsibility for her own life.
there is no time limit to solve your problems, but there is a way to cope. Also, if I have a question I want to be sure to address, I call the voicemail beforehand, this way we both are sure to discuss it first.
I promise it will get easier to relate as you get more comfortable with your doc.
Thank you Scrunchin, I appreciate you letting me know how you got on with the counselling. I know I am doing the right thing keeping on going to see my counselor, I will just have to learn that babbling away is a good thing
Kate - every time I hear how somebody in the US goes without something medical that they really need because of insurance, I get so angry. As you know, I am an ostomist, and I often find myself sending spare supplies to friends in the US because they can't afford them and their insurance won't cover it. I mean gee, what are they supposed to do, sticky tape a food bag to their tummies, or poo all down themselves. It really makes me angry I am angry on your behalf too, not being able to have the 90 minute sessions with the therapist that you found helped you more.
Marbleflys - thank you for your reply too, I am so glad that therapy helped you to deal with how you feel about your daughter. Just another case of it working, so I am definitely going to hang in there.
Second counseling session
! I hope things continue to go well with her! I would have posted earlier, but somehow I missed this thread -- I'm spacey sometimes -- but I've been thinking about you even if I don't spot thread titles (and don't reply) until a week later!!
have been when I'm with her for more than an hour...THAT'S when the really "good stuff" comes out. Unfortunately I have crappy insurance and 90-minute sessions are pretty expensive 
.
I am angry on your behalf too, not being able to have the 90 minute sessions with the therapist that you found helped you more.