I had a hard time with my xh when we were married too. It was really hard to not have stuff in the house because he ate like crap. If we didn't have that stuff in the house, he would spend so much $$ on gas station food and such. He was very rarely ever sweet but once in awhile he'd bring home an ice cream....I really hated to ask him not to do that because I was afraid it would leave nothing (which, FTR, it did). We were very bad at communicating together -- well, bad in that I'm a communicator and he refused...so we never got to one of those meeting-of-the-minds where he could really understand how I felt and the issues and how I couldn't it do it without him. I actually was doing really well once we got divorced...I controlled the food and the money and the excursions, money was really tight at first so we never ate out, and ate at my parents' a lot, no eating out lunches at work. I felt like I had all this time since I wasn't taking care of him and his crap. Then the novelty wore off and I got too much in life like we all do, and all those habits died away. Worse now that I"m in school. I'm really struggling to get there mentally....so I know that the problem is definitely me in my head. He definitely didn't help, and might I have been more successful with support? Probably. But it definitely wouldn't have fixed my head about it all.
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