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Old 04-22-2014, 01:17 AM   #1  
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Default Tried every Wt loss program with same results... i gain it back...again and again

I am starting this at the suggestion of my therapist as another form of journaling to keep myself accountable and be able to relate to real live people going through the same types of problems.
I am 34 years old, I live in the Midwest, I am a nurse, I am married and a mother of 2 crazy and wonderful kids, ages 4 and 7.
Last week was a very low point for me, I reached a new high on the scale, one I had not seen before. I hit 260, I had been in a small yo yo between 240-250 for the past year. I swore I would NEVER let myself get above 250, the next thing I know I am eating junk like crazy and shocker when I stepped on the scale my weight went up.
I have been overweight all of my adult life. I joined the military (Army national guard) at age 18 and barely made the cut off body fat percentage to join,then for the 8 years I was in, I just got by for the body fat regulations. After I got out of the National Guard I really started to climb with my weight.
In the past 10 years I have tried: weight watchers numerous times, Ali medication, hydroxycut, raspberry ketones, ideal protein, bariatric advantage, atkins, nutritionist, personal trainer, medifast, and many "versions" of my own. I don't like to even think about the money I have spend on all of these different programs, foods and subscriptions over the years. And I know none of these programs will work long term unless I change my habits. I am usually able to lose 5-10 lbs then I think ok, I can cheat a little now, next I am saying screw it I am not doing this anymore then I gain back all the weight I just lost with an extra 10 added on. The most I lost was 50 lbs when I did ideal protein 2 1/2 years ago, but I hit that goal weight and thought again ok I got this, I quit doing the follow up appointments, started gaining little by little and after all that work of losing 50 lbs and being at my goal weight. Less than 8 months later I had gained all of it back and kept climbing from there.
At the suggestion of one of my doctors I did a bariatric surgery consult, at the time my insurance would not pay for the surgery unless I had a "consecutive" BMI of over 40 for 3 years straight. Since I had the period of time where I lost the 50 lbs on Ideal, the 3 years had to start over for consecutive BMI over 40. I don't have any co-morbidities that my insurance will accept, so if I end up going the surgery route I have to wait until October of 2014 to get the insurance pre-auth. I am not sure that is what I will end up doing as I know that is just a tool to use not a solution to the problem of weight.
I have low back and shoulder problems all of which are better when I have dropped even 5 lbs. I struggle playing with my kids outside cause I get so short of breath since I am so out of shape, a walk to our park is only 3 blocks away and I cant even talk while I am walking.
I am young and I don't want to feel like this for the rest of my life. I don't want the "perfect" beach body, I just want to be pain free, play with my kids and set a good example for them as they grow up. Being in the medical field I know all the things associated with obesity and how much risk I am putting myself at by being overweight.
I can talk myself into or rationalize anything so I can eat what I want. it's easter, it's Friday, it's my co-workers last day, my kids really wanted ice cream, I don't have time to drive the extra 1/2 mile across town to go to subway instead of burger king, I just need to finish the bag of candy in the house so I will stop thinking about it. I could go on and on.
Wow! sorry that got a little long for an introduction. Anyway I am hopefully optimistic that this type of setting will help me stay accountable long term.
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Old 04-22-2014, 07:15 AM   #2  
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Mercedes welcome and what a great outpouring in your introduction. It takes readiness to take the next step and you sure seem to be there.

There are many approaches, but one you might consider given your history and diet rock bottom is Intuitive Eating, IE for short here. Maybe you have already considered this as part of your path forward, if not you might google and read the free PDF by Rob Stevens. There are threads in the Chicks in Control that start with IE and a monthly thread on General Diet and Support if it strikes a chord with you.
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Old 04-22-2014, 11:50 PM   #3  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mercedes136 View Post
I am starting this at the suggestion of my therapist as another form of journaling to keep myself accountable and be able to relate to real live people going through the same types of problems.
I am 34 years old, I live in the Midwest, I am a nurse, I am married and a mother of 2 crazy and wonderful kids, ages 4 and 7.
Last week was a very low point for me, I reached a new high on the scale, one I had not seen before. I hit 260, I had been in a small yo yo between 240-250 for the past year. I swore I would NEVER let myself get above 250, the next thing I know I am eating junk like crazy and shocker when I stepped on the scale my weight went up.
I have been overweight all of my adult life. I joined the military (Army national guard) at age 18 and barely made the cut off body fat percentage to join,then for the 8 years I was in, I just got by for the body fat regulations. After I got out of the National Guard I really started to climb with my weight.
In the past 10 years I have tried: weight watchers numerous times, Ali medication, hydroxycut, raspberry ketones, ideal protein, bariatric advantage, atkins, nutritionist, personal trainer, medifast, and many "versions" of my own. I don't like to even think about the money I have spend on all of these different programs, foods and subscriptions over the years. And I know none of these programs will work long term unless I change my habits. I am usually able to lose 5-10 lbs then I think ok, I can cheat a little now, next I am saying screw it I am not doing this anymore then I gain back all the weight I just lost with an extra 10 added on. The most I lost was 50 lbs when I did ideal protein 2 1/2 years ago, but I hit that goal weight and thought again ok I got this, I quit doing the follow up appointments, started gaining little by little and after all that work of losing 50 lbs and being at my goal weight. Less than 8 months later I had gained all of it back and kept climbing from there.
At the suggestion of one of my doctors I did a bariatric surgery consult, at the time my insurance would not pay for the surgery unless I had a "consecutive" BMI of over 40 for 3 years straight. Since I had the period of time where I lost the 50 lbs on Ideal, the 3 years had to start over for consecutive BMI over 40. I don't have any co-morbidities that my insurance will accept, so if I end up going the surgery route I have to wait until October of 2014 to get the insurance pre-auth. I am not sure that is what I will end up doing as I know that is just a tool to use not a solution to the problem of weight.
I have low back and shoulder problems all of which are better when I have dropped even 5 lbs. I struggle playing with my kids outside cause I get so short of breath since I am so out of shape, a walk to our park is only 3 blocks away and I cant even talk while I am walking.
I am young and I don't want to feel like this for the rest of my life. I don't want the "perfect" beach body, I just want to be pain free, play with my kids and set a good example for them as they grow up. Being in the medical field I know all the things associated with obesity and how much risk I am putting myself at by being overweight.
I can talk myself into or rationalize anything so I can eat what I want. it's easter, it's Friday, it's my co-workers last day, my kids really wanted ice cream, I don't have time to drive the extra 1/2 mile across town to go to subway instead of burger king, I just need to finish the bag of candy in the house so I will stop thinking about it. I could go on and on.
Wow! sorry that got a little long for an introduction. Anyway I am hopefully optimistic that this type of setting will help me stay accountable long term.
Welcome Mercedes to this site. Here you will find all the tools to help you along your journey of permanent weight loss. I know what you describe--you get close to your goal weight and then it's time to eat again. I've done it too, but no more. I never went for the yo yo diets--I did South Beach and that worked for me years ago--but now I am done with eliminating foods out of my food group--I just eat less of it. I identified my problem food as bread--so when I see it I eat a lot less of it--or none at all. I have lost about 25 pounds and still have the toughest last 6 to go--to get where I want to be at 140 pounds. And once I get there--I am going to weigh myself daily--so it never comes back.

I just found this chart--to get your BMI and estimate what you need for a daily calorie intake along with how many calories you burn on a normal day. It's easy and interesting.

http://nutritiondata.self.com/tools/calories-burned

Good luck to you and Welcome.
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Old 04-23-2014, 04:40 AM   #4  
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Hi Mercedes. Don't apologise for the detail. It is much more useful and more interesting than hi' my name is xxxx help me.

Anyway, in your post you have identified the answer. Haven't you?

Not because i know you can't find it, but because i am the sort of person who just loves to spell out everything, i'll tell you.

Next time you go on a diet, it has to be for the rest of your life. That is not to say you have to restrict your calories for the rest of your life but you do have to commit to eating a certain way for the rest of your life. I have found this helpful. It doesn't mean adjustments can't be made as you go along but i think it does require an awareness that going with the flow is never ever going to work.

And the hardest thing about that is that it does get sorta boring.

I've done a few diets in recent years, mostly i tailor my own and it always works and then my circumstances change and i end up back where i started from.

Last time i did a serious diet, i said to myself, i know i have to remain vigilant but i got depressed and when that happens, well it goes to muck.

This time i have prioritised my mental health. Of course will always be something unexpected around the corner and i am just trying to factor that in this time too. I have given up smoking over 17 years ago i think and i have not had one cigarette in that time. NOt one! despite depression, stress, job losses, love losses, house moving, and so on and so forth. I figure i can be that committed to be cigarette free, i can apply the same thinking to my eating habits.

I won't pretend, the food thing is actually a bit harder than quitting cigarettes, because we have to eat. But my thing is to quit sugar. Which does not mean i never eat biscuits and crap like that, but the situations i choose to eat it, will be rare and fairly low risk.

But the other thing is that i am committed to eating good wholesome foods only. Very few refined and processed foods as a regular part of my diet. I try to avoid spending a lot of time cooking and sometimes i do feel a little bored but it passes.

Of course it would probably be harder if i had kids. But i would take my kids along with me on the healthy food journey too. I wouldn't let me kids eat much sweet stuff. They don't need it anymore than we do. I'd probably let them eat treats once a week and keep nothing of the kind in the house for them. No potato chips, or chocolates, or sweets or ice-cream. they'd grow up loving fruit.

Actually when i was a little kid apart from the desserts she used to make, we only had bought sweets and soda once a week maximum. But she didn't have a major weight problem either. But i went to boarding school and we would binge for fun. I know it was completely stupid.

Anyway now i'm really rambling on. … so i might as well keep going. :-)

anyway i really like healthy food and healthy eating. Even when i'm eating only sweets the whole time, i actually have a craving for vegetables. The only problem is when i'm binging, i don't want to cook anything. So i don't get my vegies.

So for people who struggle to get started on a diet, i often suggest starting off at maintenance calories and just reduce a little bit when you are ready to start losing. That way you can eat a lot, not go very hungry, and stabilise your weight or start reducing while you get your eating habits resolved because when you do this, you decide to eat healthy whole foods and not processed crap.

Also look into a book called the Don't go hungry diet which is basically IE but more nutrition and science oriented than plain psychology oriented. I only realised it was the same thing the other day when someone described the satiety monitoring technique.

I Hope something here is somewhat useful.

Welcome.
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Old 04-23-2014, 01:43 PM   #5  
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Hi. We are similar in age, weight, life, and past history when it comes to dieting, though I've never lost 50 lbs. I can relate to how you feel. I am a few years older than you and have a toddler so, you hit home with me when you said you don't want to feel like this for the rest of your life and you want to play with your kids. I hear that! I started 2 months ago, almost exactly 2 months. Ive lost 30 lbs so far and am working out regularly. I calorie count, and have recently discovered that I think my body needs more food then I've been giving it... I was only doing 1200 a day, but about 3 weeks ago I stalled and started losing and gaining the same 3 lbs. I added about 350 more calories. At first I gained again and panicked, but I am noticing now that I have more energy and feel better than I had been so I think increasing my intake was the right thing to do.

Anyway, you are in a good place and my story above was meant to serve as a "it takes time" to figure out what's right for you kind of thing. You'll get great support and new perspectives here.
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