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Old 01-21-2014, 03:00 AM   #1  
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Hey there 3FC!

So I've recently restarted dieting (god knows how many times I've done this), the good thing is I'm only gained 6lbs from my lowest weight before the holidays, when I was 169. I feel at a loss at what to do now, I have started eating clean (low carb, lots of veggies and protein, greek yogurt) last 2 weeks and only a lb down. I understand I can't expect any big changes, but I already feel tired of dieting if that makes any sense?

My main motivator right now, I have a wedding in May and I'm going to see family members I haven't seen in 10 years! Last time I visited, they were so mean to be about my weight (and I weighed much less than I weigh now!!) it made me cry. They've criticized every part of my life, education (I used to be pre-med but decided at the end of college to do public health), my weight (big one!), my love life (the reason I'm not "marryable" is due to my weight which caused my looks to go bad, and my education) I was depressed and I told myself I would never let anyone get to me like that ever again, but here I am 10 years later scared as **** to go back there. In all honestly, when I was younger hearing these things from family really hurt, but I didn't let it get to me, but when I go back there, it will seem like things got worse (same job, higher weight) ugh I'm so sick of it! So I'm using this negative energy to kind of fuel my weight loss if that makes sense.

I honestly want to go to this wedding looking really good!! I know I can't reach goal, but what do you think would be realistic? I was thinking, assuming I'm very diligent, 10lbs/month? By the end of April I could be 144 lbs? This seems completely unrealistic to me, mostly because I haven't weighed that in ages, but is it possible? I don't want to be disappointed if I haven't reached the exact number but I want to know I'm reaching for something that is actually attainable.

I'm walking a mile a day for exercise, should I change something there? I feel like nothing is exciting in my diet plan this time, it's so dull and boring and just blehhh. Sometimes I feel like I'm *supposed* to be this weight because it doesn't budge at all!!

Anyway, would love to hear any advice you guys have. Sorry for the sob story of a post!
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Old 01-21-2014, 03:26 AM   #2  
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Just to give you an idea of what I have to wear to this wedding

http://www.pinterest.com/pin/410249847277574587/

It shows so much skin... Should I start weight training or 30 day shred maybe?!
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Old 01-21-2014, 09:45 PM   #3  
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Wow! Love the dress!

That aside, I'd check around here for recipes to keep food fun and tasty. I know the WW thread has lots of them. I think the calorie counters and maintaining threads also have lost of recipes. Plus, if memory serves me correctly, there is a thread just for fab food finds. Just browse around.

Exercise, if a mile is all you can manage that's good. But, I would say get to the gym and hit the weights.

Two programs I've done, the New Rules of lifting for Women, and working on the New Rules Supercharged. You can get the books reasonable at Amazon.com And the authors have a very helpful forum. jpfitness.com

Don't be afraid to bang some iron, and heave some weights. It'll reshape your body like crazy!

On the days I don't lift, I try to get in a minimum walking of 3 miles, prefer 5.

So to the original ? A reasonable goal. You have about, 12-16 weeks. I'd shoot for 15/20 pounds, and utilize a good mix of weight training, walking, Yoga is fun as well.

Overall, what I'd really shoot for, is a healthy lifestyle, you can maintain, above and beyond the wedding. You don't want to have to do this every time, there is an event in your life.

I will tell you the weight training, for me has been a Godsend! I love it! It makes me feel so strong, and powerful, and "BAM" I can deadlift more than my body weight! Don't mess with me, I'll take you out!

Don't worry about the family, in my experience, and I'm old, I have grandkids, the biggest slammers, are only trying to make themselves look better at your expense. You don't have to give them that power!
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Old 01-25-2014, 11:36 PM   #4  
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Thanks!! The dress is really pretty but right now it just looks awful!! I need to be able to looks semi decent in this haha

I think I need to pick up some weights soon! If I can at least "look" thin and be the same weight, I'm ok! I def have to look at some new recipes, I think boring food just makes me feel blehh.

I know =( I always keep wanting to lose for an event, but I swear it gives me the push I need, just wish it was also something I could do long term. I'll start looking into those recipe threads!

Thanks again
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Old 01-26-2014, 12:12 PM   #5  
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I am not an expert in anyway but I can share with you what has worked for me. We also have fairly similar stats. Based on my own experience I think 144 might be difficult to obtain. I would shoot for 150-155 since unfortunately sometimes you will have weeks you do not lose even though you have done everything right.

Since I am just starting out and I don't have a lot of fitness knowledge I knew that I needed structured workouts that someone else had planned for me.

I decided for cardio I wanted to follow the couch to 5K program. It is easy to find the program online and there are a lot of apps that you can download as well. I prefer the app because it takes all the guess work out. I just turn it on, get on the treadmill and it tells me when to walk and when to run. I have had to repeat some weeks but just knowing my workout is planned it is easier to start. I do my cardio 3 x a week on Mon, Wed and Fri.

I also wanted to do strength training but again had no idea where to start. I bought the book New Rules of Weightlifting for Women and I LOVE IT! It explains everything so well even for a complete newbie. Again having my strength work outs planned for me in advanced makes it easier for me to get them done since I am not as intimidated as I would be if I had to make a workout program from scratch. I complete my strength workouts on Tues, Thurs, and Sat.

Sunday is my rest day but I still try to go for a walk or another low impact activity.

I notice you have already lost 25 lbs. As you are losing weight you need to increase what you are doing to keep seeing the loses. Walking a mile a day might have been enough to get you from 200 to 175 but you might need to push your body harder to get from 175 to 150.

Clean eating is a great start but even healthy foods can have too many calories. I myself am a calorie counter and I try to stay between 1600-1800 per day. I use my fitness pal to keep track which makes it really easy
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Old 01-26-2014, 12:17 PM   #6  
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It's actually pretty hard to predict the amount you could safely lose, and it seems like it might be a lot of pressure. Could you maybe push yourself to stay on your plan until the wedding, knowing that will get you the best results?

Also, yes. Start weight training, or yoga, or whatever. But do something to maintain your muscles now and you will look better in that dress at whatever weight you are actually at.
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Old 01-26-2014, 01:18 PM   #7  
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I'm at a much higher weight, so I wouldn't be able to give advice or say that's a good goal with a good conscience. But I will say that the dress is gorgeouuuuuuuus, wow!

No matter what your weight, I hope you have an amazing wedding and show 'em all up with a great attitude!
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Old 01-27-2014, 02:53 AM   #8  
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Originally Posted by Rated View Post
I am not an expert in anyway but I can share with you what has worked for me. We also have fairly similar stats. Based on my own experience I think 144 might be difficult to obtain. I would shoot for 150-155 since unfortunately sometimes you will have weeks you do not lose even though you have done everything right.

Since I am just starting out and I don't have a lot of fitness knowledge I knew that I needed structured workouts that someone else had planned for me.

I decided for cardio I wanted to follow the couch to 5K program. It is easy to find the program online and there are a lot of apps that you can download as well. I prefer the app because it takes all the guess work out. I just turn it on, get on the treadmill and it tells me when to walk and when to run. I have had to repeat some weeks but just knowing my workout is planned it is easier to start. I do my cardio 3 x a week on Mon, Wed and Fri.

I also wanted to do strength training but again had no idea where to start. I bought the book New Rules of Weightlifting for Women and I LOVE IT! It explains everything so well even for a complete newbie. Again having my strength work outs planned for me in advanced makes it easier for me to get them done since I am not as intimidated as I would be if I had to make a workout program from scratch. I complete my strength workouts on Tues, Thurs, and Sat.

Sunday is my rest day but I still try to go for a walk or another low impact activity.

I notice you have already lost 25 lbs. As you are losing weight you need to increase what you are doing to keep seeing the loses. Walking a mile a day might have been enough to get you from 200 to 175 but you might need to push your body harder to get from 175 to 150.

Clean eating is a great start but even healthy foods can have too many calories. I myself am a calorie counter and I try to stay between 1600-1800 per day. I use my fitness pal to keep track which makes it really easy
Omg! I get so excited when I see people my height that weigh less than me!! It gives me hope!! thanks for responding

Someone actually told me that I'm in maintenance right now and I have to push a little harder to lose the rest. I think I need to try the couch to 5k, everybody on here seems to love! Do I need a fancy treadmill? I have a very basic one with only inclines/speed changes, it doesn't come with programs? I'll def look into it!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Secret Swan View Post
It's actually pretty hard to predict the amount you could safely lose, and it seems like it might be a lot of pressure. Could you maybe push yourself to stay on your plan until the wedding, knowing that will get you the best results?

Also, yes. Start weight training, or yoga, or whatever. But do something to maintain your muscles now and you will look better in that dress at whatever weight you are actually at.
Yeah that's very true, that's why I didn't want to hope for 145 and then be disappointed if I didn't reach it. I just want to lose something at this point and hopefully maintain my plan throughout the wedding and after the wedding. I keep falling off the wagon after the event I'm planning for is over, so this time it needs to be different.

This wedding (not mine but my cousin's) I'll be seeing someone who I was almost engaged to, and his family is VERY critical when they see me. I really don't understand why they feel they can talk to me that way, but the last time they saw me I was in the 160 range, so to be at 160 or below that (ideally) is what I'm going for. It's not the best way to go about this, but I'm fueling this as my motivation! but thanks for the input! Much appreciated!

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Originally Posted by coolacrity View Post
I'm at a much higher weight, so I wouldn't be able to give advice or say that's a good goal with a good conscience. But I will say that the dress is gorgeouuuuuuuus, wow!

No matter what your weight, I hope you have an amazing wedding and show 'em all up with a great attitude!
Thank you Coolacrity!! You have lost 33 lbs!! go you!! Are you calorie counting/exercising? I know, I really want to go in with a good attitude, have a good time and leave. At the end of the day, it's my health and that's what I want to change
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Old 01-27-2014, 06:45 AM   #9  
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I'm really bummed your family treats you this way. And your ex-bf's family sharing any opinion about your weight is just beyond the pale! Gah!

Anyhow... I'm not sure what the best way to go is. I lose weight so much faster when I'm not exercising. When I started exercising my weight loss slowed down to a crawl. And for the last several weeks I've been exercising like a madwoman and not losing anything. But I know that I look a lot better and of course I feel better. As a long term strategy, I'd say lose most of your weight and then start exercising. But it might be that you will look better and healthier at the wedding if you start now.

And I saw your post in that other thread... It's nice to see you here, too! That must have been the "getting out of the 170's" and then "160's" thread that we were posting on together last summer. I have actually been stuck ever since that time, but I feel ok about it bc I am maintaining and exercising like a maniac and I look better. But I would love so much to get down another ten pounds!
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Old 01-27-2014, 08:49 AM   #10  
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I am not in a position really to give you weight loss advice. However what really bothers me is how these people treat you. You want to lose weight and get healthy and are taking better care of yourself. My advice is to be proud of this and tell them to stop treating you badly.
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Old 01-27-2014, 04:17 PM   #11  
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I'm really bummed your family treats you this way. And your ex-bf's family sharing any opinion about your weight is just beyond the pale! Gah!

Anyhow... I'm not sure what the best way to go is. I lose weight so much faster when I'm not exercising. When I started exercising my weight loss slowed down to a crawl. And for the last several weeks I've been exercising like a madwoman and not losing anything. But I know that I look a lot better and of course I feel better. As a long term strategy, I'd say lose most of your weight and then start exercising. But it might be that you will look better and healthier at the wedding if you start now.

And I saw your post in that other thread... It's nice to see you here, too! That must have been the "getting out of the 170's" and then "160's" thread that we were posting on together last summer. I have actually been stuck ever since that time, but I feel ok about it bc I am maintaining and exercising like a maniac and I look better. But I would love so much to get down another ten pounds!
Yeah! What a great summer! I felt like pounds just came off, stepping up my game now is the hard part =(

When I exercise, I feel really good, but I am SO hungry!! I know I will eat back calories and that part I hate! Are you still doing IF Rubidoux?? I feel like you've made great progress since last year!!

I started my diet today and so far, so good! I'm try to become OCD about it, so that I won't waste time restarting. If I give myself any room like "only one piece of pasts, or one bite of ice cream" I start to justify anything and everything that is bad for me. So we'll see how it goes!

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Originally Posted by scarletmeshell View Post
I am not in a position really to give you weight loss advice. However what really bothers me is how these people treat you. You want to lose weight and get healthy and are taking better care of yourself. My advice is to be proud of this and tell them to stop treating you badly.

I know He comes from a family that is very fashionable, they have a lot of $$, like to keep a "I'm holier than thou" attitude. Even when I was with him, at first they were SO nice to me, but after they would make comments, and my ex would say they're looking out for my health, but part of me felt like they were trying to drive me away. My ex wasn't this way, but his family doesn't want him settling for anyone that wasn't good enough for him. It's what ruined our relationship in the end because he would never say anything to them, and I don't need to be with anyone who justifies behavior like that. Also, married life with in laws like that? Dear god. But they still make comments, but the worst comments are when what they tell me is kinda true. Like that I don't care to lose weight or I would, because I do cheat on my diet, I am well aware of it, but dieting has never been easy for me or anyone else I know. They also have told me "the break up must be hard since you've gained weight", we broke up 7 years ago, I'm not gaining weight because of your son. UGH!

So I guess I just want to be able to show them I can take care of myself and I can live a healthier, so that they can finally shut up. lol
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Old 01-27-2014, 08:07 PM   #12  
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I am doing IF with a vengeance now! lol It has been months since I ate more than one meal in a day. It's so crazy. I used to have easy days and not so easy days with it, but now I almost never even think to do things any other way. I used to wonder if it would ever feel really normal and second nature and felt like that would be so weird, but now here I am and it does feel very normal and not like any kind of struggle. Today I stayed home with my kids because my ten year old is sick and I gave my four year old a free ride and I was a little worried that just being home and hanging out and not being busy would drive me to snacking but it's 5:00 now and I'm gonna start cooking dinner in probably an hour and I haven't been thinking about eating. It's like I'm out of the habit, yk?

I totally understand what you mean about having to be ocd about it. If I have one bad bite, it's all over for me, for at least that day. I have been working on that and do a little better with it now sometimes, but I'm pretty darned ocd. Like, I don't think I could handle having any of my big no no's, like grains or potatoes. I have gotten away with a couple of spoonfuls of ice cream on a couple of occasions, though. And when I go shopping I totally obsess about whether or not I can buy ice cream for my kids because I'm afraid that now that I've gotten away with it a couple of times, I'll push it and screw up. Sigh...
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Old 01-28-2014, 03:15 PM   #13  
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I am doing IF with a vengeance now! lol It has been months since I ate more than one meal in a day. It's so crazy. I used to have easy days and not so easy days with it, but now I almost never even think to do things any other way. I used to wonder if it would ever feel really normal and second nature and felt like that would be so weird, but now here I am and it does feel very normal and not like any kind of struggle. Today I stayed home with my kids because my ten year old is sick and I gave my four year old a free ride and I was a little worried that just being home and hanging out and not being busy would drive me to snacking but it's 5:00 now and I'm gonna start cooking dinner in probably an hour and I haven't been thinking about eating. It's like I'm out of the habit, yk?

I totally understand what you mean about having to be ocd about it. If I have one bad bite, it's all over for me, for at least that day. I have been working on that and do a little better with it now sometimes, but I'm pretty darned ocd. Like, I don't think I could handle having any of my big no no's, like grains or potatoes. I have gotten away with a couple of spoonfuls of ice cream on a couple of occasions, though. And when I go shopping I totally obsess about whether or not I can buy ice cream for my kids because I'm afraid that now that I've gotten away with it a couple of times, I'll push it and screw up. Sigh...
That's awesome!! I loved eating in the limited time frame but eating one meal would be very difficult for me.

I totally get that rubidoux! The other day I had a coupon for a little debbie brownie box, told myself I would eat one and give the others way. I ate half the box before I even got home. I need to discipline myself a lot better with sweets, they will also be my downfall.

Do you ever crave sugar? and how many cals does the one meal add up to? I'm on day 2 and haven't cheated yet, same weight though. Hopefully there is some movement by the end of this week.
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Old 01-28-2014, 09:12 PM   #14  
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That's awesome!! I loved eating in the limited time frame but eating one meal would be very difficult for me.

I totally get that rubidoux! The other day I had a coupon for a little debbie brownie box, told myself I would eat one and give the others way. I ate half the box before I even got home. I need to discipline myself a lot better with sweets, they will also be my downfall.

Do you ever crave sugar? and how many cals does the one meal add up to? I'm on day 2 and haven't cheated yet, same weight though. Hopefully there is some movement by the end of this week.
Sweets are my biggest problem, too, though I can binge on potatoes or bread or pretty much anything carby. All of the gazillion times I've fallen off the wagon, it's been because of sugar cravings. Right now, though, I can honestly say I haven't been having cravings for a while, like the last few weeks. I would not be surprised if they show up again, though. I feel like sometimes I can be really well behaved for a period -- I think once it was like 90 days -- and then from out of nowhere I get cravings and everything goes straight to h*ll. lol I'm hoping this time is different, but scared to count on that. If it is different, it might be because I really have given up all grains completely. I think wheat is a big trigger for me and none has passed my lips since december. I have done that before, though, so I'm not sure. I am eating very cleanly, though. Not even any low carb treats really.

I am no where near "arrived" but as I work at this (and it has probably been nearly three years now, think I started getting serious around 3/2011) I think I do figure things out and get better at it, yk? For example, the other night my husband and I got to spend a whole night alone with no kids, which was outrageous because it was the first time since my ten year old was born.

So, of course we had to go out for dinner, and I swear to you, right now is the first time I have even realized that it didn't cross my mind to ditch everything and just enjoy myself. In the past, I would totally have thought I should go ahead and have some bread and potatoes and desert since it was such a special occasion, but I didn't even think of it! I ended up having a steak and a small side salad instead of the potato that came with it. It was super yummy and I was fine with it. I did have a gin and tonic, but judging from my blood sugar after, there wasn't much carb in it (looked it up online and tonic is carby but they make their own tonic and it didn't seem to be). I never woulda been able to get through that a year ago without being totally thrown off.

So, my meals are probably all over the place because I am not really counting calories, but I would say they range from about 700 to 1100 calories. I also have approx 200 calories worth of heavy whipping cream in my coffee in the morning, so my daily cals are probably 900 to 1400 or so. I'm also working out a ton, but I think, if anything, that is working against my weight loss.

I hope you had a good day 3!
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Old 01-31-2014, 01:19 AM   #15  
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I really really really need to get into that mind set! Today I was baking some stuff for my brother, ate a cookie and completely broke my diet. It's like I can't get through a week anymore, and before I went on for weeks. It's terrible.

So are your workout days on the higher cal days? Man I totally need to revamp my diet routine. I losing time each time I fall off the wagon.

Btw heavy cream??! Do you whip it? Or just pour it in? I never heard of putting that into coffee before.
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