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Old 08-17-2013, 02:34 PM   #1  
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Default Cultivating some patience?

I think I've finally found the way of eating that's going to work for me, but now I'm struggling with something I've always struggled with while losing weight, which is patience.

I have about 130 pounds to lose I think and I won't even be close to 199 for another year.

Something shifts in my perspective when I'm finally losing weight. I start to get too excited about reaching big goals like 199 and 170 and 150, everything above 200 just sounds unpleasant even though I'd much rather be 250 than 280, and then I'd rather be 230 than 250...etc. I can't get myself to see those goals as big goals, even though by the time I reach 230 I will have lost 50 lbs, which is incredible.

Maybe I'm just afraid that the weight loss won't last and so I'm feeling anxious that it's going to take so long to reach goal. I'm not trying to push it and I know 1-2 pounds per week, sometimes more or less, is what's going to happen so I don't know why I can't just calm myself down and let it happen.

What about you guys?
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Old 08-17-2013, 02:59 PM   #2  
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You do have a big goal coming up! 10% of body weight is coming up for you, and that's a huge milestone. Every doctor on this planet says that losing 10% of your body weight will help reduce so many obesity-related health problems, and you're only 17 pounds away from that. That's amazing.

I am very goal driven. I let myself get set up in small goals. First was to 325, then 10%, then Under 300. I celebrate my goals with small non-food related treats and it has really helped keep me motivated. After all, it still sucks that we're still in the 200s, but it took years to put these bad boys on and it might take years for us to shed it. I just wish I could tell you how awesome losing 12 lbs so far is.

And yes, we all fear that we'll gain it all back. It is probably the greatest fear next to not accomplishing our big goal.
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Old 08-17-2013, 03:00 PM   #3  
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I am definitely having this problem this go round. since I was right at 202 in Oct of last year it is hard to focus on being happy for milestones on my way back down, all I can think of is where I COULD be had I not fallen off the wagon for 8ish months.
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Old 08-17-2013, 04:08 PM   #4  
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Aww, Wishfuiiy, that woke me up a bit. I tend to sabotage myself and there's no reason I shouldn't be happy for percents lost, and for sizes down. Any pound loss is a victory towards my goal and sometimes I lose sight of that.

At pnkrckpixikat; I feel the same way. In middle school I got my weight down to 165 and if I had just understood more about health and fitness I might've at least been able to keep myself from gaining as much while I worked on finding a good WOE for myself. Now I have to remind myself that it doesn't matter what I used to weigh or how much time I've spent gaining, it matters that I'm losing right now and that I've found a WOE that works for me and has finally given me hope. I think we can both be glad we're at least losing and not gaining.
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Old 08-17-2013, 04:29 PM   #5  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by thewalrus0 View Post
I think I've finally found the way of eating that's going to work for me, but now I'm struggling with something I've always struggled with while losing weight, which is patience.

I have about 130 pounds to lose I think and I won't even be close to 199 for another year...
Hi! I had the same problem. Time seems to pass so slowly when you want it to go by faster! Go to the dollar store (or your kitchen) and get yourself a pretty little clear glass jar. I put a shiny penny (has to be shiny) in my jar for every pound lost. Over time, it has really added up, and my jar may turn out to be too small! I take the coins out and play with them, line them up on the table, play with patterns, count them... I really like that I can't even comfortably hold them all in my hand, now. There are too many! It really helped me to watch the jar fill up.

Also, it gives me daily incentive to think about my weight loss as I try to avoid spending shiny pennies, and excitedly anticipate getting shiny pennies when I receive change. I never want to be without one or two, because who knows when the scale will move and I'll be able to deposit in the jar! It's the little things....really... try it.

I recently saw a tip that had 2 jars... one with marbles for each pound to lose, and one for pounds lost. As you progress, you move marbles from one jar to the other. That could be effective, too.

And, go immediately to the grocery and take three 4lb bags of sugar off the shelf. Hold them all in front of you and just stand there. Bend at the knees and squat down, then stand up again. Carry them to the end of the aisle and back. That's 12 pounds. How does it feel to put that load down? Girl, you've eliminated 12 pounds from your body weight. Celebrate that fact!

I like to "picture" my weight loss... all piled in the corner of my kitchen. ha! It can really add up!
1 box of butter = 1lb
1 bag of apples = 3lbs
1 gallon of milk = 4lbs
12 pack carton of canned Cokes = 5 lbs
1 bag of potting soil = 40lbs

Make it a game. Time will pass and the pounds will fall off. You'll be amazed at how far you've come in a few months.

Last edited by AwShucks; 08-17-2013 at 04:36 PM.
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Old 08-17-2013, 04:47 PM   #6  
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I feel like I'm reading my own thoughts and feelings from each of you,just remember to never give up on yourself.I know it gets old to always be " on your way to your next milestone" sometime I want to quit over how long it takes, and a few times I have quit, it only took me to a new high of 250 instead of46 in 2007, and226 in 2011, Dont quit and really just be patient because you are doing way better than gaining. Grea t job so far, we all look forward to losing with you!
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Old 08-17-2013, 05:04 PM   #7  
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I understand because I have been impatient too. I remind myself that any major accomplishment of mine took time. It took 4 years to graduate from high school and then another 4 years for college. At those times, I did not feel impatient for the 4 years to pass. I looked at what I had to do for the semester, then what I had to do for each course, and finally what I had to do that day. The time passed and I graduated. I am looking at my weight loss the same way. What do I need to do today??

I also look at small 5 and 10 pound goals. I love the idea of moving the marbles from one jar to another.

However mainly, I don't even think about how much weight I have to lose. It is too overwhelming. I just reach for the next decade. Concentrate on each day.
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Old 08-17-2013, 05:33 PM   #8  
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Oh, it's like I could have written your post, too. I absolutely relate.
All I can say is that the time will pass anyways, whether or not I lose weight. Sometimes reminding myself of that larger picture helps to reduce the myopia I have with regard to weight loss and the ensuing sense of impatience. It's not perfect, but sometimes it has helped.

Something else folks do is set rewards for mini-goals reached. Would that help?
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Old 08-17-2013, 06:49 PM   #9  
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this is the reason my ticker only goes to 245, if I put my ultimate weight goal on my ticker I will focus on the pounds 'to go' rather than lost. so I set it to my first goal of 245 which will be 10% of my body weight lost. breaking it up into smaller parts makes it feel less daunting. its the same idea as people that put on their signature 'I cant lose 100lbs, but I can lose 10lbs 10 times' etc.
also, you've lost 12lbs! even if you never dropped another pound (which you will) you are 12lbs lighter than you used to be. that is a great achievement, considering many people are gaining, or not even trying. keep up the good work and well done, give yourself a pat on the back, you deserve it!
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Old 08-17-2013, 07:16 PM   #10  
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Hugs

You just kinda take it one day at a time, one pound at a time.
I am the most impatient post I know, but you know what? The time will pass anyways. I'm nearly at a year and I can't believe it!
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Old 08-17-2013, 07:27 PM   #11  
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Patience is an enormous challenge.

Suppose you discovered that you had put on 50 pounds in a year. Wouldn't you be shocked? 50 pounds gain in just a year? That is such a huge amount. Oh my goodness, how could someone let that happen.

Well if 50 pounds gain in a year is a shockingly large amount, then sit back and contemplate that 50 pounds loss in a year is also a shockingly large amount. Don't think of it as slow going, because it's not. It's drastic, radical, shocking change. It's worth working for and when you get it, it's a massive achievement.
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Old 08-17-2013, 07:37 PM   #12  
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I was thinking about this again, and I also realized that what can make the time go faster is setting other (related) goals that will actually facilitate your weight loss goals but must be given 100% focus (ex. fitness goals -- lifting a certain amount, walking at a certain pace, running a certain amount, doing certain stretches, goals to learn to cook certain healthy recipes or to use certain ingredients in healthy foods, etc.) These kinds of goals might give you something else to focus on, while supporting your weight loss goal the whole time. The only caveat is to make sure these are goals you actually want to accomplish.
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