[geoblewis]

I was just thinking about how much of my time/effort/money/resources/life I've spent focused on the size of my belly/butt/thighs, or how seriously I considered what I thought other people thought of me due to my size, plus everything I've done over the years to manage it all...what a monumental focus of energy and resources!

I'm in the middle of shifting where I want to go with my life. Not sure just where yet, but I will not spend another moment working towards getting all my ducks in a row before I do something that I really want to do!

I am eating the way I want, the way I plan to eat for the rest of my life. I have found what I love to do for fitness. It's how I roll now. I think it's very balanced and healthy for me, so I don't have to put much thought into tweaking it any more. If I can't lose another ounce from the way I choose to live now, then this is maintenance.

It's time for me to put a lot more focus on things I actually want to achieve, beyond losing weight. Losing weight is not a legacy to leave to my children. Losing weight does not define who I am. Healthy and vibrant are terms by which I choose to be defined. Fun-loving and spirited. Grounded and spiritual. Loving and warm.

[Mozzy]

Good for you!!!!

[PreciousMissy]

Wow geoblewis, you sound very empowered!

I have spent waaaaay too much time focused on what I was putting in my mouth, how I looked, what others thought. Don't get me wrong, I still care about all of those things, just not as obsessively as before. I have to be happy with me, that's what matters.

[Radiojane]

I've spent a great deal of time over the last year "obsessing" over weight loss. I'm sure I'm the most annoying person to talk to in the universe. Before I started to do something, I spent a lot of time silently obsessing. I'd really like to find a little balance and try to enjoy life even while I still have weight to lose.

I really admire your attitude. You're very inspirational!

[krampus]

It's been a rough ride but I find less vigilance = less obsession which = lighter weight and easier life. I am not going to lose everything I value in life if I have an ice cream cone, and I am not going to regain all the weight I have lost and lose all my conditioning if I miss the gym for a week.

[Campana]

This is so true. I normally focus so much on losing weight that I get obsessed and really soon getting fed up on this. We must look at it as a lifestyle change not an obsession that takes over your life.

I totally agree with everything you said, especially the last paragraph:

It's time for me to put a lot more focus on things I actually want to achieve, beyond losing weight. Losing weight is not a legacy to leave to my children. Losing weight does not define who I am. Healthy and vibrant are terms by which I choose to be defined. Fun-loving and spirited. Grounded and spiritual. Loving and warm.

I do want to point out one thing however. We all like to think of ourselves as perhaps the exception. Same with smokers...I won't get lung cancer....But I think that is very dangerous with both smoking and weight.

Vibrant, happy, loving all of those YES. And bravo. But healthy? I know I was going down a bad road at 280. I am not unique. I was probably heading for diabetes, heart disease, I already had bordeline bad bloodwork. I could say spiritually I was good but I could not say I was healthy.

And now closing in on 250 and I would like at least 50 more after that, the increase in my health has been tremendous. I run now. Doing a C25K. I move so much easier. I am a lot stronger. I can't imagine having lost 30 how awesome it feels to how losing 50 more would.

But I know I am not healthy at 250, Or at least as healthy as I want to be. I have to keep going. I am sorry I wish we could say we were healthy as in body health, not mind health, not spouse, family, kids, friend health but body health at any weight. I just do not think that is true.