Total Random Vent! - 3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community

AnnMarie77 · 05-13-2013, 10:42 AM

So I'm on one of those calorie counting sites...you know the ones, no need to name them. Where you have "friends" and news feeds and you post your weight and diary and all that...

I guess I don't get the etiquette on there, or there is something that I am missing...

I have a whole bunch of "friends" many of whom added me, who never post on anything of mine...ever. They post about themselves a lot, so I know they are on there (as opposed to the people who just seem to have fallen off the radar).

I try to post a little something on everyone's stuff when I can. I'm not 100%, but I try.

Anyway, what is the etiquette here? I feel weird that they are reading my stuff and not ever posting a word on it. Is it ok to de-friend them? Confused!

PreciousMissy · 05-13-2013, 11:23 AM

I'm not on that site, but I would think it's like any other social media. I have friends on Facebook that don't comment or like a post that I've put up and I'm ok with it.

It's your page, do what makes you comfortable.

bethFromDayton · 05-13-2013, 11:40 AM

It is absolutely okay to de-friend them if you don't feel you're benefiting from the association (providing and getting support).

I have too many friends on MFP--I can't keep up with as many as I have and I forget details about them. I don't want to de-friend anyone because they are posting--but I feel as if I'm the one not posting enough.

Do what works best for you--it's a support system--and you need to make it work in a way that will be supportive!

AnnMarie77 · 05-13-2013, 11:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bethFromDayton

It is absolutely okay to de-friend them if you don't feel you're benefiting from the association (providing and getting support).

I have too many friends on MFP--I can't keep up with as many as I have and I forget details about them. I don't want to de-friend anyone because they are posting--but I feel as if I'm the one not posting enough.

Do what works best for you--it's a support system--and you need to make it work in a way that will be supportive!

I could see that happening too, getting too many friends and then it just gets overwhelming. There are so many posts going into the newsfeed for everything.

Thanks!

AnnMarie77 · 05-13-2013, 11:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PreciousMissy

I'm not on that site, but I would think it's like any other social media. I have friends on Facebook that don't comment or like a post that I've put up and I'm ok with it.

It's your page, do what makes you comfortable.

I was on Facebook a long long time ago and I quit it. Maybe these types of social media just aren't for me now that I think about it.

Thanks!

Thedollylala · 05-13-2013, 12:03 PM

I know I don't comment as often as I should on my friends status, but I do try, but I rarely make post aside from closing my diary, or workouts.

Remington90 · 05-13-2013, 12:20 PM

I decided to just not have friends on my app. I could, as it gives the option. I've just chosen not to. I come here for the support and help and socialization in terms of weight loss (and life too). I'm sure this post doesn't really help you any.

If it were me, it wouldn't really matter if someone commented on my things or not. I'm doing it for me. I get that it would be nice to have some motivational words or a congratulatory response every now and then. But as I said, I come here for that. This community seems to be #1 for that, and like someone else said, I have friends on facebook who never comment or like my things. And I'm okay with that.

AnnMarie77 · 05-13-2013, 12:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Remington90

I decided to just not have friends on my app. I could, as it gives the option. I've just chosen not to. I come here for the support and help and socialization in terms of weight loss (and life too). I'm sure this post doesn't really help you any.

If it were me, it wouldn't really matter if someone commented on my things or not. I'm doing it for me. I get that it would be nice to have some motivational words or a congratulatory response every now and then. But as I said, I come here for that. This community seems to be #1 for that, and like someone else said, I have friends on facebook who never comment or like my things. And I'm okay with that.

No, your post is actually super helpful actually. I never thought about the option that I could just use an app like that just for the weight loss tools on it.

AnnMarie77 · 05-13-2013, 12:52 PM

Thanks everyone. This was really helpful.

I'm definitely going to change how I look at the site, mainly use the weight loss tools on there that are helpful for me and keep up with my friends on there who I do have a supportive "friendship" with.

And everyone else is getting defriended or hidden without guilt.

Thanks again

Remington90 · 05-13-2013, 12:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AnnMarie77

No, your post is actually super helpful actually. I never thought about the option that I could just use an app like that just for the weight loss tools on it.

Well glad I helped then!

elvislover324 · 05-13-2013, 01:02 PM

I don't have friends on MFP, I keep it for myself and my nutritionist as it's easy to review with her.

Weightloss is stressful enough without having to do the whole support thing with others. (Somehow posting here isn't stressful to me though!) I also never had facebook or twitter so I don't have to deal with those.

I say, post here with us. We will surely add responses and support for you (maybe even too much!!).

AnnMarie77 · 05-13-2013, 02:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by elvislover324

I don't have friends on MFP, I keep it for myself and my nutritionist as it's easy to review with her.

Weightloss is stressful enough without having to do the whole support thing with others. (Somehow posting here isn't stressful to me though!) I also never had facebook or twitter so I don't have to deal with those.

I say, post here with us. We will surely add responses and support for you (maybe even too much!!).

The diary function is really helpful.

I don't do Facebook or twitter either, so maybe these kind of things just aren't my thing lol. I probably am more of a forum person.

Everyone seems super nice and helpful here

Mozzy · 05-13-2013, 07:26 PM

Do what works for you, without guilt!

punkrocksong · 05-14-2013, 07:30 AM

I have FB...and I get on there maybe once every couple of months. I thought defriending people I didn't really know or talk to would help, but I found that I still don't really post on other people's stuff as much as I should.

I don't have any friends on MFP, and I've turned down requests. I'm not trying to be a D, I just don't want that added responsibility. I come here for support and I like that I've met people that aren't part of my daily life in the "real" world with all of their good or bad intentions and all the unsolicited advice.

I'm a really socially awkward and introverted person though, so how I feel may not be the norm!

fadedbluejeans · 05-14-2013, 09:15 AM

I have a bunch of friends on MFP, who I added or (mostly) who added me because they wanted ideas on what to eat, and I don't mind sharing my food diary if it can help someone else. But, I get burnout from trying to post on everyone's updates

and, while I appreciate those who take the time to post to me, I don't require the feedback. I joined it to use the food tracker as tool for myself.