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Old 05-12-2013, 06:57 AM   #1  
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Old 05-12-2013, 07:43 AM   #2  
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So, is it possible to be naturally chubby/skinny? Because I can't seem to lose weight no matter what I do!
There's a thread called "more thoughts on naturally thin" you may want to check out. While it's true that people differ in body frame and (to a lesser extent) in metabolism, I think they differ far more in their eating behaviours.

I don't believe in naturally chubby/skinny as much as naturally attracted to food or not. I think some people are a LOT more attracted to food than others, and by and large these are the people who will struggle with weight.

You said you can't lose weight, but you have lost weight in the past. I'm pretty confident you could lose weight now too, if you were in a hospital program being supervised by doctors 24/7. In fact, an obesity expert has said, "I don't know a single person who can't lose weight on a medically supervised diet."

I suspect the reason you "can't" lose weight is that you have trouble sticking with eating moderately. Just about all of us 3FC-ers do. That's why so many of us (including me) have yo-yoed between higher and lower weights for decades of our lives.

For us attracted-to-food types, losing weight is not easy and maintaining it is even harder -- not physically, but mentally. But it's most definitely doable. You just have to want it badly enough, and experiment to find a way of eating that minimizes your sense of deprivation. For many of us, this means eating mostly healthy foods, enough protein and fibre to feel full, and not going too low in calories.

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Old 05-12-2013, 03:47 PM   #3  
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First, welcome to 3FC!

I do want to say I second the post from freelancemomma. You have lost weight in the past, so you can lose it again.

It is a struggle and you do need to find what works for you, and what you can stick with.

I calorie count. I cut out sodas. I measure everything I eat! I do not "guess" the portion or try to eyeball it. I drink mostly water.

I made a whole heck of a lot of changes because for years I could not lose weight. I thought I was doing everything I could, but I wasn't. One 20 ounce bottle of soda is more than one serving. Sauces and dips can quickly add a good amount of calories. I used to drench my salads in full cal/full fat dressings.

And don't get me started on my coffee! There was so much cream and sugar in there, I might as well have skipped putting coffee in the cup! LOL!

I suggest that you do the following:
Read through posts on this forum that catch your eye.
Use the search option for specific questions you may have.
Start using a calorie tracking app/program like My Fitness Pal.
Switch to drinking water only.
Measure and/or weigh everything you eat. Log every bite or sip you take.

It is also easy to over estimate the amount of calories you burn. You might "think" you burned 500 calories but have only burned 100....And calorie burn calculations can also be way off.

I have done those things and a few other things and have dropped 42 pounds since January. Just last year I was crying that I couldn't even lose 10 pounds, or 5 for that matter!

Feel free to visit my blog to see some pics of me, my measurement changes (sometimes the scale doesn't move but our body is changing!) and maybe you will find something helpful there as well.

If you join My Fitness Pal add me as a friend there. RavenWolf1977
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Old 05-12-2013, 04:20 PM   #4  
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You can do it, you can be just like them.

Take it step by step, day by day. Keep a weight loss journal.
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Old 05-12-2013, 05:36 PM   #5  
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I don't mean to spoil it for you, but I lost 20lb because all I ate for the day was a slice of ham (it only lasted for a month). Does this mean that the only way for me to lose weight is by starving?
No, you need a calorie deficit to lose weight. You don't have to starve to do it. Have you considered joining a program like weight watchers? What do you typically do to try to lose weight? Do you exercise? What is a typical eating day like? Can you post a sample of what you eat for a day when you are trying to lose weight?










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Old 05-12-2013, 07:34 PM   #6  
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People have varying frames, metabolisms, and hormonal responses to food. Some folks definitely are bigger by nature than others (I have two daughters, for example, who are fed identical diets and yet one is strong and broad and the other is short and slight, they wear the same clothes despite being different ages). But if we're talking morbid obesity, even pediatric onset? Very, very rarely would it be something 'natural' to the person, unless they had a severe endocrine disorder.

Now, minor dysfunction in that area IS common, and can cause both inappropriate appetite and more ready energy storage, when food is present in the system. But while it can and does happen, that does NOT mean it cannot be managed. It's the primary reason I do the diet I do (low carb, somewhat calorie controlled) - to deal with metabolic issues that make it too challenging to lose weight on a higher carb diet. I have to circumvent the system, so to speak, to keep cravings manageable enough that I can lose. I also have to suppress insulin spikes as much as possible or I begin to feel badly.

All this to say that Freelance is right and that thread is what you should read. While there is a whole spectrum of body shapes and the accompanying genetics behind them, that doesn't mean one is doomed to never overcome it or manage it. I was chubby from childhood and morbidly obese by the end of high school. And yet I have still managed to lose about 30% of my starting body weight and maintain it through physiologically challenging circumstances, for multiple years. It CAN be done, but not every diet is suitable for every person, and some are easier to adhere to than others.
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Old 05-12-2013, 07:36 PM   #7  
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And I must say, unless you're being melodramatic please talk to someone in real life about your suicidal feelings. That is a far more severe problem for you than the weight. And fixing the weight without sorting out the emotional issues than can accompany it is a quick recipe for regain.
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Old 05-13-2013, 09:45 PM   #8  
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Well I hate to say it, but you're going to stay that way as long as your attitude is that you can't lose weight.

Nobody can do it for you but you, and even with a genetic tendency toward higher body weight or more easily accumulated fat mass, it is no life sentence to obesity if you don't allow it to be. You're in the driver's seat making the choices here, nobody else.

Genetics load the gun, but our choices and habits pull the trigger. If you don't take control, then yes, you WILL be unable to lose weight. But that's your choice, and don't fool yourself to the contrary.

Last edited by Arctic Mama; 05-13-2013 at 09:45 PM.
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Old 05-14-2013, 01:13 AM   #9  
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I think weight loss starts with education.

I've been researching health and fitness since age 17, but before that I had an ED and starved myself.

I used to believe the only way was to eat almost nothing and exercise religiously.

Then I started to educate myself, but I am still struggling with lasting weight loss because I am one of those people who is naturally predisposed to crave foods when they aren't truly hungry. I struggled also with some issues with perfect eating and trying too much too soon.

When they say to take baby steps they really mean it!

But your attitude will be your biggest asset.
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Old 05-14-2013, 01:46 AM   #10  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cocktailhat View Post
I don't mean to spoil it for you, but I lost 20lb because all I ate for the day was a slice of ham (it only lasted for a month). Does this mean that the only way for me to lose weight is by starving?
After many years of trying every diet imaginable (or so I thought), I started eating *nothing* but meat. I didn't think it was going to make me lose, since nothing had. But I was pretty sure it would be helpful for my blood sugars. But then, what do ya know... the pounds just melted off me. I'm not saying you should necessarily go this route, but you may have been onto something w the ham. 20 pounds in a month is pretty impressive!

Quote:
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Well I hate to say it, but you're going to stay that way as long as your attitude is that you can't lose weight.

Nobody can do it for you but you, and even with a genetic tendency toward higher body weight or more easily accumulated fat mass, it is no life sentence to obesity if you don't allow it to be. You're in the driver's seat making the choices here, nobody else.

Genetics load the gun, but our choices and habits pull the trigger. If you don't take control, then yes, you WILL be unable to lose weight. But that's your choice, and don't fool yourself to the contrary.
I do understand what you're saying and why you're saying it. BUT I was totally in that place of believing that it was actually impossible for me to lose weight. I had even had doctors tell me that type I's cannot lose weight. I 100% believed that my fate was to either starve myself and stay at my 40+ bmi or to get a little bigger every year until who knows what...

But the minute I realized what was happening w the meat everything changed for me. Really it was a very sudden turnaround that changed my whole outlook and I really went with it.

It was not that I had a bad attitude or pulled the trigger w my bad choices or was refusing to take control. There was nothing more that I wanted than to be able to control this central devastating problem in my life. Every time a diet turned out to not work for me I thought I needed more d*mned vegetables and less fat. Looking back on it I cannot believe how whole-heartedly I bought into all that cr*p, but I guess I really did. Even though I had done Atkins for years earlier on, more than a decade before discovering the meat thing, I still believed I needed freaking veggies and less fat. Gah! I guess it comes down to the fact that I wasn't thinking outside the box bc I had been so thoroughly indoctrinated. But it wasn't a bad attitude.
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Old 05-14-2013, 07:55 AM   #11  
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<<I keep thinking it's genetic! I remember all I ate as a child were boiled eggs, potatoes, spinach and grilled chicken. The only time of the week where I could put a sweet in my mouth was on Friday, right after school. >>

You can lose weight on Twinkies (not that I'd recommend it) and gain weight on chicken and eggs, if you eat enough of it. Do you truly believe that if you were on a supervised diet in a hospital, you could not lose weight? I don't. I believe you could do it -- and that you wouldn't have to starve yourself.

Wonky genes can make things a LITTLE harder, but can't override the first law of thermodynamics. Every living human expends a certain amount of energy to keep the body going, plus the energy to move and digest. It may be 2,500 cals/day for some people and 1,500 for others, but there's a floor. Eat less than that and you'll lose weight over time.

Freelance
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Old 05-14-2013, 04:31 PM   #12  
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Genetics can play a role, but as many others have said, attitude and willpower can overcome those =)

I am the oldest of 3 girls, and I have always been pudgy. My 2 younger sisters are both incredibly thin, many of my family members are well proportioned and attractive, and all I saw when I was around them was a chubby Plain Jane.

I've been on that emotional side, also...hating myself, starving myself, wishing something would change. But really, only you can make that first step towards changing, no one is going to be able to do it for you. It took a long time for me to realize that.

There are so many weight loss plans out there to try...low carb, high protein, calorie counting, etc. I chose weight watchers because it seemed the most forgiving if I had a bad day, and I could still enjoy many of my favorite things in moderation. It seems like a lot of work to start, and I still make mistakes, but I'm glad I'm doing it. Any change towards eating and living healthier is good...even if it's just a walk around the block, or choosing the carrots over the chips.

Even just being mindful of what you eat is a good start...I didn't realize how often I would go into the kitchen for munchies until I started keeping a journal. Now I cook a bunch of things one day a week, and just grab and re-heat when needed throughout the week. I write the point value right on the box/package, and it makes keeping track a lot easier.

Hang in there, and always try to stay positive =) I know it's easier said than done, but like I said, any change for the good is better than no change at all. I know you can do it!!
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Old 05-14-2013, 04:36 PM   #13  
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No. Haven't read the replies but I have spent the last 38 years under the assumption that my estranged father was "big" therefore I must be "big". Note that my mother, now aged 60, is in great shape as is my brother. Both are super skinny.

Having tried weightloss I have come to the conclusion three decades late that I am not genetically disposed to being big and that my mom may actually be more dominant in my "natural" size. In simple terms, I am dropping it like it's hot now I am watching what I eat (most importantly) and exercising more.

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Old 05-14-2013, 05:08 PM   #14  
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It is not genetic, and I know it's not an easy thing to hear but this weight loss business really is just about burning more calories than you eat. Like you, I have been big from a very young age...I know how it feels to get wrapped up in wondering "WHY ME?!, is this genetic, it's so unfair!...etc.", this burden was unfairly and carelessly hoisted upon us...it ABSOLUTELY was. You are not unjustified in your anger and confusion...but here's the catch, YOU have the power now. Many, many people have lost the weight, take them as your examples. Each and every one of them did it the same way, regardless of what "plans" and "diets" you may hear them speak of...they ate fewer calories than they burned throughout the day. There is no need to starve yourself. I have lost 50 lbs by not exceeding 1500 calories each day, and light work outs. If I want an ice cream or something like that, I eat it! As another 3FC poster has said, "I eat anything I want, just not as much as I want." If I can do this, YOU CAN TOO! Please do not even fathom taking your own life, there is so much more beauty to life than being thin...sticking it out, through the good days and the bad, is the only way to find it. Outward beauty is transient...value inner beauty instead. This is absolutely NOT genetic, there is nothing "wrong" with you, and you absolutely can do this if you set your mind to it. You've made a positive decision in joining 3FC, there are endless examples to emulate here, go take a look at the Goals page, and you'll see for yourself just how possible this is. HUGS!
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Old 05-14-2013, 05:25 PM   #15  
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Ever since I can remember, I have always been overweight. I have always been the fat friend, the fat daughter, sister, cousin, etc. There simply hasn't been a single stage of my life where I have felt anywhere near thin. Since 13, I had never weighed less than 152lb, until I got depressed and lost 20lb. Unfortunately, I soon gained it back, plus an extra 62lb, meaning I now weigh 209 pounds! I feel so depressed and envious of skinny girls I want to take my own life! So, is it possible to be naturally chubby/skinny? Because I can't seem to lose weight no matter what I do!
I was the same way. I was 220 pounds when I started high school. Over the years I lost a little weight, but always gained it back and then some. I can't ever remember a time when I wasn't overweight. So sure, it would have been easy for me to think that I was just always going to be fat because I have always been fat.

For years I let myself stay fat. Then, 8 months ago when I reached my highest weight of over 400 pounds, I decided - once and for all - to make a commitment to myself to lose weight. I realized that I never really gave losing weight my best effort. I never stuck with a way of eating. I never made a lifestyle change. It was always a temporary diet that I abandoned eventually.

When I finally figured out that I had to change my way of eating for good, I was able to succeed in losing. Today, I am 145 pounds lighter.

If I can do it, anybody can do it. I know you want to, badly. You can do this!

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