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Old 04-14-2013, 08:53 PM   #129
Staying the Same
krampus's Avatar
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Troy, NY
Posts: 6,448

S/C/G: 160+/116-120/maintainer

Height: 5'5


"Starving" is an interesting and elusive concept. For many the joy of seeing the scale move to a lower number outweighs the urgency of gnawing hunger, and for others a caloric deficit that is manageable and even enjoyable for others feels like the end of the world. I think attitude plays a big factor in starvation.

When I experienced reactive binge eating and was calorie counting, I probably ate 1300 calories on my lowest calorie days - on average I'd go a little over, to 1600-1700. My macros were less than ideal - nowhere near enough protein or fats but lots of people eat that way. I think for me the "starving" sensation was less physical than psychological - I wrote down what I ate every day, tallied up calorie counts, and constantly felt like I was just counting down the seconds to the next meal. I would make all these hopeful posts every day saying "tomorrow will be better" and built it up to crumble and "fail" day after day. I regained about 15 pounds from my lowest weight.

After a global move and a couple different living situations, I started going to the gym and lifting weights and eating right again. I didn't count calories because it was too much work - and I had a boyfriend who cooked me delicious meals and I moved so I wanted to try new places to eat. The weight I had regained fell off and I haven't grossly overeaten or binged (with the exception of inebriated munchies which don't count ^__^) because I always feel like "if I NEEEEED XYZ I can have it" and regularly eat things like ice cream and steak. Sometimes I wake up feeling "gross" but never guilty or ashamed, and I just end up having a light lunch or something not to compensate for caloric excess, but because I just don't feel like eating a heavier lunch if I had a bunch of ice cream the night before.

However, I know my age and weightlifting play a huge role and I probably won't "get" to eat this much and stay in my current weight range forever...
Push on some more!

Last edited by krampus; 04-14-2013 at 08:54 PM.
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