It's a wonder I don't pass out from all of the diet yo-yoing I've been doing for most of my life. I've never been a small girl. I'm tall (5'10") and have always been taller than most females around me. However, my width has fluctuated over the years so many times that I could wear my stretch marks as clothing and not a soul would know that I was naked (in the South that’s "neckked"). I'm sick and tired of this expansion and contraction game. I'm especially tired of the expansion. I want to get to my goal weight and stay there without being sabotaged by emotional/stress eating. Oh, did I mention that I can eat and drink my weight in food and sugar in one sitting if I'm being dealt some hard blows in life, or if my feelings are hurt, or if I'm under the gun with deadlines and responsibilities, or if the sun rises in the east and sets in the west Yes, I'm in need of some serious help. If anyone has conquered or is at least adequately managing this type of problem, please let me in on the secret to your success. Today, I woke up already tired and grimacing as I faced my "two job" day. Before the morning was over and after my boyfriend said something insensitive to me (well, it seemed insensitive at the time), I was running after a honey bun and a Sprite. Helppp!!!
First off, :HUG:! You could be writing about me! I eat boredom, stress, joy and just because it's there. It's crazy. These past 4 years has been my first venture into diet and fitness so I don't have a yo-yo-ing past... or much of an expand and contract past either... It was pretty much all expand from childhood to about 4 years ago. I do understand the shall-we-say, awkward, relationship with food though.
What's helped me is calorie counting, especially writing down the calories BEFORE I shove stuff into my mouth and also having "real talk" sessions with my self where I talk myself off the ledge of a food abyss. Also coming on here on 3FC keeps me accountable and encouraging, seeing all these lovely chicks so disgustingly on-plan even when they're facing life challenges makes me want to be disgustingly on-plan as well and not let the side down. It doesn't always work, but it mostly does and that's what counts.
The secret is, that there is no secret. I'm sure that's like the lamest thing you've ever heard and doesn't help at all. But it's true. It's different for everyone. The "fix" is a little different for everyone, what works is a little different for everyone. I mean ya, calories in vs. calories out* is what makes a person lose weight, so that part is simple - though not easy (*SOME exceptions, so no one jump all over me about carb sensitivities and genetic conditions, this is a generalized statement that is true for the vast majority of people out there).
Anyway, everyone has to get to that point. That sick of it point. That I'll have no more of this point. And when you do, things will fall into place. At least that has been my personal experience. Some of us need more help than others overcoming our issues, the trick is knowing when and where to ask for and seek that help if you need it.
Your post is so similar to my life, except I did way more expanding than contracting.
I had a health scare last summer that literally changed my life and will effect me for the rest of my life as it was probably 99% due to my weight and hormone levels (i.e. I could have controlled it, I just never knew it could even happen).
So, after all that, I decided to get myself to a nutritionist and learn how to eat like a normal person. I follow a strict diet plan and time schedule (it's a range of time such as 12-2 for lunch, so I keep myself satisified and not hungry to go off plan) and can I tell you, being on a strict plan has been the most freeing thing I have ever done for myself??
Now, you might think, I am told what to eat, when to eat, how much to eat, etc., how is that freeing? It keeps me from going off plan [read: eating junk food, drinking junk (whether soda or alcohol), no more guilt eating from friends or family, etc.]. My plan has freed me from boredom eating, sad eating, happy eating, all the reasons I used to stuff my face all day and all night. There is no mindless eating on my plan, I am eating for my health and for weightloss, I am learning portion control and everything is weighed, I am never hungry! Who knew you could eat healthy food and not be hungry? I have a feeling I never was hungry, it was to mask all the feelings I was trying to hide.
I am not saying it's easy or there aren't days that I want to throw in the towel. Of course my nutritionist gets paid from me (my insurance), but she's invested personally in me and that makes me feel accountable to her (in a good way). I enjoy (!!!) getting on the scale with her each week and seeing it go down, down, down. Some weeks are better than others but I have stayed on plan as a commitment to myself and what she is teaching me.
In the end, it really is all about calories in and calories out. Days I don't want to do exercise? TOO BAD. If I can't get on the treadmill, then I can't go get a coffee or go shop at the Goodwill. My exercise has to come first, even if it's only for a half hour.
You can do this, I promise you! Losing this weight has been the happiest thing I have done for myself in a good 10 years and even though I have bad days here or there, I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world (esp. bad unhealthy food!).
I know how you feel. I was NEVER an emotional eater ever. But when I was around 13, I was dealt 2 really big blows in life. Ever since then I always found myself feeling better after I indulged in food, even when I wasn't hungry. I could seriously eat 2-20 piece nuggets with a large fry and be ok. After high school I gained a lot of weight and still found myself emotional eating. If I was stressed, somebody made me mad, somebody upset me, I got into a fight with somebody, I was "down in the dumps". What I found to help me was to think of something else. I know it's so cliche to say that, but it truly does work. Or, if I'm out doing something I will distract myself and instead of maybe eating, I will just down water to just get my mind off it and to trick myself into thinking I don't need it. Once 5 minutes has passed, I usually don't have the urge to eat anymore. I also don't keep anything "binge" worthy around me. I am notorious for being a huge candy lover, and I'm even more notorious for eating it late at night when I'm laying in bed watching Tv, so I just don't keep anything around me that will "trigger" my indulging. It all sounds like small and like it wouldn't work but it does really work. You just have to stay strong and keep thinking about that body you want to achieve or how great you know you will feel. Stay strong. I know it's not easy but you will get there. I promise!
Thanks guys for the straight talk and encouragement. I am facing that I have developed quite a few issues over the years. Not only am I an emotional/stress eater, but over the years I've developed food sensitivities and severe hormonal fluctuations. I commend all of you for your discipline and for your weight loss success. You've given me something that I haven't had in a long time-- hope. I have a long way to go in order to reach my goal, so I view this as a lifestyle change, not just a diet/fitness project. I've got to somehow change my mind and my way of coping with life, so I thank you for your support and advice. I need them both.
First off, :HUG:! You could be writing about me! I eat boredom, stress, joy and just because it's there. It's crazy. These past 4 years has been my first venture into diet and fitness so I don't have a yo-yo-ing past... or much of an expand and contract past either... It was pretty much all expand from childhood to about 4 years ago. I do understand the shall-we-say, awkward, relationship with food though.
What's helped me is calorie counting, especially writing down the calories BEFORE I shove stuff into my mouth and also having "real talk" sessions with my self where I talk myself off the ledge of a food abyss. Also coming on here on 3FC keeps me accountable and encouraging, seeing all these lovely chicks so disgustingly on-plan even when they're facing life challenges makes me want to be disgustingly on-plan as well and not let the side down. It doesn't always work, but it mostly does and that's what counts.
I know where you're coming from, Gamechanger, 'cause I'm right there with you. I eat for all the same reasons you do. The thing that helped me the most was cognitive behavioral therapy. I am learning how to be more comfortable with emotions I don't like. I am also learning how to set boundaries and change the changeable situations in my life that cause me distress. It has helped, though I am certainly not trigger or craving free, by any means.
Something really practical that my therapist taught me is that, for the most part, cravings only last for about 20 minutes. If I can just get through that 20 minutes, I am often okay. I also need to get out of the situation that triggered the craving, if possible. For me, the couch at night was the eating spot. I still sit on the couch (sitting there now, in fact) but when my mind starts wandering towards various sweets, I get up and move. I go take a shower, or go read in bed, or go do something else, whatever that may be.
Thanks guys for the straight talk and encouragement. I am facing that I have developed quite a few issues over the years. Not only am I an emotional/stress eater, but over the years I've developed food sensitivities and severe hormonal fluctuations. I commend all of you for your discipline and for your weight loss success. You've given me something that I haven't had in a long time-- hope. I have a long way to go in order to reach my goal, so I view this as a lifestyle change, not just a diet/fitness project. I've got to somehow change my mind and my way of coping with life, so I thank you for your support and advice. I need them both.
I've been more successful this time around -- at at 63, I've been around and around and around with trying to get my weight under control -- and while I give myself credit for finally displaying some will power, I also know that coming here every single day has helped immensely. Yes, it does give me hope. It also gives me tips and tricks and food ideas. Some of the threads help me realize that I have it so much easier than so many others. Some of it is just the chance to say the things we all think but would never, ever say in front of someone who would never understand. So hopefully this site can be a good tool in your journey.
You know what? The more I read your responses the more insight I receive. However, most of all I realize that I'm not alone. I realize that I've been isolated for a long time. That has been very debilitating and depressing. I'm so relieved that I've found people who understand my struggle and are working through it just as I am. I'm beginning to accept that this is a daily process, mostly a progression of daily choices. All of you have given me some helpful steps and tips for overcoming cravings and binge-triggers. I also realize that some things I can prevent and change and some things I can't. However, I can fortify myself so that my response to trouble or stressors won't be so extreme. I'm going to work on a coping plan this evening so that I can begin to get stronger and more successful. Thanks guys. You've been very helpful. I pray that we all achieve our goal weight and fitness goals and that we stay in the winner's circle with no more rides on the weight roller-coaster.
Last edited by gamechanger; 02-23-2013 at 08:34 PM.
No Wonder I'm So Dizzy!
Yes, I'm in need of some serious help. If anyone has conquered or is at least adequately managing this type of problem, please let me in on the secret to your success. Today, I woke up already tired and grimacing as I faced my "two job" day. Before the morning was over and after my boyfriend said something insensitive to me (well, it seemed insensitive at the time), I was running after a honey bun and a Sprite. Helppp!!!
