Grrr! I'm not starving myself!! - 3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community

Lambiechop · 12-25-2011, 01:08 PM

I'm really getting tired of my family and neighbors telling me I must be starving myself. As of today I've lost 58 lbs, 45 of those since September 4. I eat 1200-1400 calories a day, let myself have the occasional cheat day, try to fit in some daily activity, etc. I'm a long way away from starving myself and I'm not skinny by any means (I still have a looong way to goal). I just wish people would keep their comments to themselves.

sontaikle · 12-25-2011, 01:18 PM

First off, CONGRATS ON THE 58 POUND LOSS. That is AMAZING!!

I know exactly how you feel. I don't mind a "Hey looking great!" but it does get annoying to hear things like "you are starving, you are wasting away," etc., especially when you're still considered overweight and obese. I got that a lot when I was losing and I get a lot of it now at goal. My BMI is 23.6, I'm on the higher end yet I get people saying that I look too skinny, I must be starving myself to get this skinny, etc. AGH. Leave me alone! I see healthy women thinner than me ALL THE TIME, I'm not unhealthy!

It gets worse the closer to goal you get, unfortunately :/ I have no suggestions to deal with this since I haven't found a successful way to get rid of these comments.

124chicksinger · 12-25-2011, 01:22 PM

Don't get mad--take it as an opportunity to thank them for the compliment, or educate them about the process. I'm betting that option 2 would make them back off.

lin43 · 12-25-2011, 01:28 PM

Yeah, I don't know why people don't mind their own business. I can't imagine commenting on someone's looks, body, etc. Those comments rank right up there on the annoyance scale with "Oh, don't be so strict. Can't you just eat what you want one day?" What people don't understand is that I automatically do a "cost-benefit" analysis in terms of calories. I plan to treat myself on the holidays, but I don't plan on blowing my plan out of the water and eating everything in sight, and it seems that people expect you to do that.

I wish people would mind their own business!!!

gagalu · 12-25-2011, 01:36 PM

i know. it's absurd. especially when they're eating double or triple the normal serving size while insisting that WOW YOU MUST BE ANOREXIC

so annoying

it's like

have you seen me i am not anorexic get out of here

Thighs Be Gone · 12-25-2011, 04:26 PM

Funny and not so nice...I once read here the response, "I don't EAT like everyone else because I don't want to LOOK like everyone else.."

anyway, just some holiday humor!

DrivenByAmbition · 12-25-2011, 04:30 PM

Sorry that people have gotten you down about this. Keep going, no matter what they say.

Beck · 12-25-2011, 04:40 PM

Congratulations on your weight loss success! People can be so thoughtless sometimes, and I wish I could say that I just let it roll off my back, but I'm forever biting my tongue at some of the comments people have made recently about my own weight loss.

You know what you're doing to achieve your goals, so focus on that. Don't let anyone diminish the hard work that you've put into making healthy food and fitness choices.

Keep up the great work!

Neicy0909 · 12-25-2011, 05:05 PM

Let them say what they want as long as you know you are eating then dont worry . I will say this though you have lost 45 lbs since wow

shcirerf · 12-25-2011, 07:54 PM

Congratulations!

Just a thought, but losing 45 since September is pretty fast, which may be why folks are concerned. But I wouldn't worry about it.

My 95 year old gramma thinks I'm anorexic at 140 pounds.

A few weeks ago I had a casual aquaintance ask me if I'd lost weight, and was it on purpose. Yes, on purpose, no I'm not sick. Sheesh people, I'm barely in the healthy range for my height and bone structure.

I really think, that as our nation as gotten fatter, our perception of a healthy weight is skewed.

I hug gramma and tell her I'm fine, and tell her what I weigh, the rest, I just blow them off.

melodymist · 12-26-2011, 02:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Thighs Be Gone

Funny and not so nice...I once read here the response, "I don't EAT like everyone else because I don't want to LOOK like everyone else.."

anyway, just some holiday humor!

hahhahahahaha

LOVE IT!!!

Karig89 · 12-26-2011, 05:15 AM

first, congrats on your awesome loss! second yes those people need to keep their comments to themselves. I found a few years ago when I lost a lot of weight some of those people were actually trying to sabotage my weight loss by encouraging me to eat more-and not good things either-even though I was still quite over weight. Do what's best for you and don't mind other's comments. It sounds like you are doing it very sensibly and you should be proud of your success.

Steph7409 · 12-26-2011, 09:30 AM

Just the other day, a co-worker told me I'm getting too skinny. It's not tue, of course, but I think she meant well. I've been overweight for as long as she's known me, so I think the change in my appearance is a bit jarring for her.

I know some people are just thoughtless and may even be mean, but I think most people who say things like "you must be starving yourself" are really saying "you must be doing something dramatic, something I could never do, to lose weight." Lots of people seem to think that there are only two ways to lose weight: fast and dangerous, or slow and safe. I don't think 2 pounds a week is slow, nor do I think I'm doing anything drastically dangerous. Eating less and exercising more is so simple, yet so difficult to do that people just can't grasp the concept.

KatieC87 · 12-26-2011, 11:22 PM

This has happened to me exactly one time. At Thanksgiving, my grandmother told me to stop losing weight because I'd "get sick." I said, "Uh... I won't get sick, Mamaw." "But you're not eating!!!" She yelled this in front of the entire family while we were still preparing dinner (so it's not as if she was watching me skip eating at the time). Luckily my mom was there to back me up. "She eats plenty! She's just exercising!" Mamaw said oh and shut up after that.

The unfortunate truth is that people equate diet with starvation or miracle pills these days. They've lost sight of the fact that losing weight is pretty simple formula-wise (eat fewer calories than you burn). Maybe they see your success and think you MUST be "cheating" to get there. I've also had coworkers claim that OF COURSE I was losing weight, I was only eating cereal all the time! (I was going through a Raisin Bran for lunch kick because I needed more fiber in my diet. And because they saw me eat it ONCE during the day, they latched onto that as evidence that I was ONLY eating cereal all day long. ::eye roll:

You know what I did? I kept going! I kept my chin up when people made their comments because I knew my habits were healthier than shoving three meals' worth of food down my throat for lunch and going home to sit on the couch for 4 hours after work. Haters gonna hate!

KatieC87 · 12-26-2011, 11:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Steph7409

I know some people are just thoughtless and may even be mean, but I think most people who say things like "you must be starving yourself" are really saying "you must be doing something dramatic, something I could never do, to lose weight." Lots of people seem to think that there are only two ways to lose weight: fast and dangerous, or slow and safe. I don't think 2 pounds a week is slow, nor do I think I'm doing anything drastically dangerous. Eating less and exercising more is so simple, yet so difficult to do that people just can't grasp the concept.

Exactly this! When my boss's daughter and wife stopped by our office about three months into my lifestyle change, his wife complimented me on how great I looked. His daughter immediately said, "I could never do what you're doing. I love food."

I just kind of looked at her and said, "Uh... I love food too!" It's automatically assumed by many that if you're losing weight you must be doing it by not eating. I still eat the foods I love. I just eat them in smaller portions!