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-   -   Defining Moment (https://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/40-somethings/243270-defining-moment.html)

Mouse46 09-17-2011 06:43 PM

Defining Moment
 
Was at Home Depot last weekend searching for new bathroom cabinet and BAM!!!!! I caught a glimps of myself in the mirror. Is that really me? Wow and not a good Wow. How did I get to this weight? Did I just close my eyes to it? How many people can relate? What was your "defining moment"?

guacamole 09-17-2011 09:11 PM

My defining moment was someone asking me when the baby was due. Actually, this has happened to me twice during the last two years. Still no baby, but I could fit into maternity clothes just the same. :o

Mouse46 09-18-2011 07:08 PM

I weigh what I did when I had my last child but I don't think I'd appreciate anyone pointing that out. :(

runningfromfat 09-18-2011 07:13 PM

I'm not sure if it was necessarily a defining moment but definitely an important one. A friend of mine posted a picture of me on facebook, sitting. My stomach looked HUGE, like I was 6 months pregnant or something. Yeah, that was a pretty good :kickbutt:to start moving more! I wish I still had that picture, I'd love to see it to compare. ;)

twinieten 09-19-2011 12:02 AM

My defining moment? I needed something nice to wear and had to buy size 16. that was the largest size I had to buy, ever. :fr: I had already been avoiding the camera and avoiding having to see my own reflection in the mirror. It was bad.

fatbottomed girl 09-19-2011 01:35 PM

My defining moment came when I realized I was making excuses to avoid social situations. Don't get me wrong, I’ve never been a party animal or anything, but I did use to enjoy small gatherings. Then my husband’s company started planning these monthly outings and suddenly I found a whole host of reasons why I couldn’t go: someone had to stay and do homework with our daughter… I wasn’t feeling well… I had too much to do that day… it conflicted with something I’d already (intentionally) scheduled. That sort of thing.

It took him saying to me, “You realize these are all excuses don’t you? You’re hiding from the world even though you’ve got nothing to be ashamed of”

As much as I hated admitting it at the time, he was 100% right. Since then I go to more events. Not all, but enough. I refuse to let my weight beat me down any more than it already has. Would I prefer meeting the other work wives in a size 6? Oh, he11 yes, but that’s not in the cards right now.

And I think that small bit of pride; the ability (even though I was quaking in my shoes) to walk into a room full of strangers with my head held semi high, fanned the tiniest flame inside me. It made me realize if I was brave enough to do that, then maybe, just maybe… I might be brave enough to lose the weight too.

EagleRiverDee 09-19-2011 01:39 PM

I haven't had one big moment, but many little ones. I skipped my 20th High School reunion because I didn't want people to see how fat I'd gotten. I avoid buying clothes because nothing fits.

I can empathize with the OP's moment. I don't know what it is about other people's mirrors, but for some reason I always see myself much more clearly at the gym's mirrors or at someone else's house. At home, my memory of what I used to look like must kick in because I don't see myself as being so fat there.

guacamole 10-10-2011 11:07 PM

I just thought of another defining moment. A few years back, when I was in a fitness craze and going to the gym 4 or 5 days per week, there was a morbidly obese woman who used to come to the same gym. She was an incredibly sweet woman, and had made it her job to lose weight and get healthy. Literally, her entire day revolved around exercise, Weight Watchers meetings, nutritionist appointments, and holistic cures (colonics, supplements, etc.).

While I certainly was long past my prime, this was before my last baby and major weight gain (I was probably around 150lbs). I wanted to lose a good 20-30lbs, but the exercise was helping me lose inches.

Anyway, I used to chat with this woman and we would trade tips - but I was clearly ahead of the game. Until.....fast forward a few years. Difficult pregnancy with 60lb weight gain, continued hypertension and related health issues post pregnancy, total elimination of exercise or healthy eating. I go back to the gym in my newly obese state and run into my old friend.

She had been slowly and steadily working out and eating right over the past few years and lost the equivalent of 1 1/2 people! I felt so fat standing next to her and she looked so tiny!

I felt like crap.

JustBeckyV 10-13-2011 10:56 AM

Before it was when I figured out that my dad weighed the same as me - now to relose another 10 - 15 lbs its the fact my jeans are tight and I have too much belly again. I feel horrible when I run :(

Izzadawn 10-14-2011 10:38 AM

I have had all of your moments ladies.... and felt the same...Thanks for shareing!!!

kirsteng 10-14-2011 10:48 AM

For me it was being invited out to a social gathering with Dh's work too, and realizing that EVERYTHING NICE in my closet was too small. I'm a SAHM, so I wear the wame outfit most days, jeans and a stretchy shirt or sweater. Haven't had need to wear any of my 'nice' clothes in quite awhile. So when I tried everything on, NOTHING fit except one skirt and blouse, that I'd already worn with the same people the previous year. And it was hte day of the event, so no time to go find something new. So as I put on that same outfit (stretchy waistbanded skirt), I resolved to never be in that position again.. staring at my closet full of things I can no longer wear because I lost sight of what was important... me and my health.

fyreflie24 10-19-2011 12:07 PM

Hey! New and jumping in :)

We went to the beach with friends in August. I refused to wear a bathing suit; I opted for a teeshirt and running clothes which was kinda cumbersome when you're wet all the time. I'd avoided the beach for YEARS and kept telling myself how much I hated it. I didn't. I really started to realize how much I'd been holding myself back. I rebooked the house for my family this time, in June and am working to really get the most out of that experience.

Darby1970 10-26-2011 04:36 PM

Hi all -
Aside from avoiding almost all social situations, mine was going to the doctor, for what I knew was probably blood pressure problems, and seeing flash on the computer screen in the exam room "Obese" in this blinking red box with black letters.

free1 10-26-2011 04:44 PM

My definining moment....Laying on the edge of the bed sick as a dog after vomiting (involuntarily) because I'd been eating everything over several hours.

Elliemar 11-15-2011 05:26 AM

For me it was a few things over a few days that made me sit down and take a good hard look at myself and make the decision to change things once and for all.

First I split up with my partner. Then my doctor packed me off for some tests. When these came back he had a go at me about my lifestyle. I was obese (214 lb) with a BMI of 35.4. Had high blood pressure, high cholesterol and was on a fast track to diabetes. I drank and ate too much and rarely went out because I felt awful in my tent-like clothes. I could barely get into my size 20's and I knew things had to change. My self confidence was in the dust and I felt fat, miserable and well and truly on the scrapheap.


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