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Old 07-06-2009, 08:35 PM   #1
Sweet girl in L.A.
 
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Red face Hope is floating on the breeze...

"Hope is floating on the breeze carrying my soul high above the ground..."

Above are lyrics from an Eagles song I like. I haven't posted here in such a long time. I am really struggling tho and this website has always helped to center me. I have come to believe that ppl like myself can't lose weight all on their own. It takes connection...that ppl connection to balance the good and the bad and the ugly.

I actually have a lapband but haven't lost any weight in months. I feel like a failure everyday. I only lost 40 lbs since having surgery a little over a year ago. I am still an emotional eater and just choose bad foods that have high calories, like ice cream, shakes, etc...that go down easy and you can eat more of. I have come to believe I need the support a sight like this offers. Having WLS is not a fix-all for my eating problems. It is much deeper than that.

So, I am hoping to find support here, and give it, to like minded ppl. People who are on the same journey as I am and that journey will be for life. I am no longer interested in a quick fix or certain eating plan. They don't work for me. I have to find a way to deal with emotional eating once and for all.
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Old 07-06-2009, 09:55 PM   #2
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Hi, Swtgila. Sorry to hear that you are struggling... But I think you've found a like-minded group of people here, all making the long-term lifestyle changes necessary for weight loss and increased health. Welcome!
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Old 07-06-2009, 11:39 PM   #3
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I like the Eagles too. One of my favourite lyrics is "So often times we live our lives in chains....and we never even know we have the key"

I'm not sure what restrictions you have with WLS and eating but for me breaking up my daily calories into 5 meals keeps me eating every 3 hours and more satiated. It has leveled out my cravings where I might make poor choices.

Also- you may want to consider findin an OA meeting close to you if you are looking for extra support with people with the same issues.
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Old 07-07-2009, 01:30 AM   #4
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Hi Swtgila, Join us in the 40's weekly chat. It's a great group with lots of support. Many of us have come to realize that this is a change for life, not a diet. Wishing you success in your journey!
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Old 07-07-2009, 01:42 PM   #5
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Thanks for the replies ladies. I will check out the chat. That 3 hour eating plan sounds really good. I feel frustrated much of the time b/c I feel like I get hungry too much or too often. I don't seem to know when to eat or what to eat 13 months out of surgery. I am able to eat more than I did when it was first new. Sometimes I don't know if I am hungry or thirsty. I have been thinking about all the diets I have tried thru the years and Jorge Cruise was one and he had you eating every 3 hrs to control hunger and help with metabolism. I believe I will try it. I have been, for quite sometime, just grazing all day but I feel that needs to change. Thanks for the advice!
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Old 07-07-2009, 02:32 PM   #6
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Also look for foods that will fulfill your cravings, but allow you to control calories. And allow yourself those on a regular basis as a reward. I'm an ice cream person - love the stuff! The fat free frozen yogurts or better yet, the fat free no sugar added ice creams, aren't bad at all. I measure my servings, and allow myself some every night if I've been "good". If I really need a chocolate fix I'll drizzle 1 tbsp of the Lite Hersheys syrup on it (22 more calories, but it helps). Having that to look forward to without feeling guilty helps me a lot.

I've also found some "pig out" foods, that I can really binge on without racking up too many calories. Spring rolls (not the fried ones) especially! My son watched me eating them one night, and asked how many of those I was going to eat! But they're super low calorie, and nutritious.

I'm trying to resolve my food issues, but I also try to remember that even people who have no diet or weight problems crave sweets sometimes. They also pig out occasionally, without worrying about it being a binge. The problem is when I have these behaviors day after day, or make unhealthy choices.
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Old 07-07-2009, 04:22 PM   #7
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Default spring rolls, yay!

Kewl! I love spring rolls but where do you get the no fried kind that are low cal??? I want it!
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Old 07-07-2009, 05:43 PM   #8
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I hear you ! I am a constant eater, and when I don't eat every two-three hours, I go into another mindspace where I rationalize at the drop of a hat. For me it is a process of discovering MY balance, where my cravings are met, but my nutritional needs exceed. I am finding as I go further into healthfood eating, that cravings change. For instance, I still crave chocolate, and allow myself plenty of it (within reason), however, it's dark bittersweet, and well, a little of that goes a long way. I use to be able to consume a whole pound of milk chocolate in one day, or less. Now I am satisfied with little nibbles of dark chocolate here and there, and I don't die if I miss it. I allow myself little tiny dishes of icecream now and then too. All the rest, I can use willpower against. I can't say as I'm a success with my plan ... yet... but after discovering how tabouleh and even popcorn are okay to pig out on.... the pig-outs become fewer over time. For instance, when I first read "FoodMatters" by Mark Bittman (I recommend it !) I realized there really are no forbidden foods for me, only that I must train myself to love healthy eating. And it's working. I eat super healthy, most of the time, with occasional conflicts with a totally rogue bad choice (yesterday and the cheese puffs... gawd) . I am realizing each time that happens, that it didn't even taste good (compared to my tabouleh) and I ate totally conscious of binging while I was eating. Good sign... being aware. The other thing, ya gotta start learning to take control of your food, and making your own, from scratch. In other words, prepared food is out of the question, in my opinion. For instance, spring rolls ; What makes a conventional spring roll so caloric is that it's deep fried, and that's unhealthy. Is it fried you're craving, or spring rolls? If you want lowcal ones, you have to learn how to make them. Improvise. Are you comfortable in your kitchen, or afraid to be in there?

Icecream? I make it myself, ofcourse. If I eat commercial icecream now, it's waaaay too sweet, and fatty and that's because I have evolved into a healthier way of enjoying it. When you make things yourself, be it icecream, frozen yogurt, sorbet, whatever, you can control the sugar, and the type of sugar, and all the ingredients. I have found that an investment in an electric icecream churn is worth it's weight in gold. But, perhaps I shouldnt' encourage it. I do believe sugar and other simple carbs like white flour, white anything (accept cauliflower is going to set up craving and so I reduce to minimal amounts everytime I make something. I now grind my own barley and oats and wheat berries, and use that in a lot in substitution for white flour. I grind buckwheat and make crepes... all these efforts really do lessen your craving for simplecarbs, I believe. I think it's a learning curve that can take years, but also only months.

I believe these things are the root of offbalance relationship with food, speaking from FRESH EXPERIENCE of being IN TRANSITION. Anyway.... I'm convinced that sooner or later the neural patterns in our head start to connect real pleasure with healthy eating, and cooking it ourselves, being in control, and feeling the results from those actions. Neural patterns which connect from emotionally painful binging from prepared store-bought food that was made without our control, and the confusion and feeling victim that comes with that way, are essentially so ready to be changed by a pivot of our conscience. I really believe this. ( I also recommend "EvolveYourBrain" by Joe Dispenza. ) Hope *is* on the breeze, as I feel the very same thing. I've been hearing and reading alot of advice from others recently, about how the change happens after the shift happens in our head/heart/attitude. I've been waiting, waiting, waiting for that. I feel I'm on the verge now, and if I sound like I have a lot of experience, I do from being on both sides of the fence, and teetering for the longest time between as well.

Last edited by Hermit Girl; 07-07-2009 at 06:46 PM.
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Old 07-07-2009, 11:02 PM   #9
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Wow! Well said my new friend! There is some good "food for thought" in your post. What you said makes a lot of sense. I am ABSOLUTELY a carb addict. Anything I can do to cut those cravings I should be doing. I am also lazy and not comfortable in my kitchen as you say...perhaps even afraid of it. I do need to make some behavioral changes like you mentioned. I really appreciate your taking the time to give your imput on my post. It has not gone unnoticed. ;-)
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Old 07-07-2009, 11:28 PM   #10
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I know it was a bit overboard, but I learned a lot for myself, as I wrote it ! I blogged it too. PM me anytime, and I'll help you get over your fear of your kitchen, promise.

Last edited by Hermit Girl; 07-07-2009 at 11:29 PM.
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