[bouncingkermit]

I want to cry! I went over to my mother-in-law and she took me aside and said that I might want to try gastric Bypass surgery. I know that I need to lose weight but I don’t need that. I have heard some really bad things about gastric Bypass surgery. I’m sure she was just trying to be nice, but it still hurt. I have been really struggling with even staying in weight watchers. I have been doing weight watchers for a while now and have not lost anything. I just wish I knew what the secret was to losing the weight.

[Jane]

((((hugs to you)))) I'm sorry this happened to you! Hopefully your mil is a nice person and she only has your health on her mind.

I think you already know there is no one special "secret" to losing... but there are some steps you can take to be successful. You have to find a program or make your own program that works for you. Keep track of when you overeat and why... then find a way to avoid those. Plan what you will eat beforehand everyday. Drink lots of water everyday and get some sort of exercise in at least a few times a week. Come here for inspiration and, if you are serious, the weight will come off.

Good luck to you!!
Jana

[Amarantha2]

Hey, fellow Arizona person, I'm sorry that happened to you. It's a good general rule not to let MIL make you sad and not to listen to them (also don't show her this post, please!!!) :

I used to know the secret of losing weight, but it now eludes me also ... I refuse to be sad and so should you ... we are too lucky to live in Arizona to be sad, don't you think?

Good for you for continuing the struggle, though success hasn't come yet. It will.

Please jump in on any of our threads here and find whatever kind of support fits your style. I hang currently on the 12-week bootcamp challenge and you'd be welcome there or anywhere here as everyone is very nice.

You will succeed, it just takes time and dogged determination!!! Don't listen to other people. They'll just bring you down and you need to stay strong!

[2cute2Bfat]

My heart aches for you. I too have had surgery "suggested" to me too.
It hurt my feelings somewhat because my fat seemed to bother them more than the danger of surgery for a person of my size.
I know there are a lot of people who have had success with it... but I also know a lot MORE who have had problems with it.

Just remember that your MIL is "probably" listening to the media about all of the successes and she is truly trying to be helpful. At least I hope so.

Either way.... you do what is best for YOU. Jana gave you lots of good suggestions. Finding the right food plan.... WATER... exercise. Gee... where have we heard that before. LOL
There is no secret... just COMMITMENT needed.... plus a little enthusiasm and determination.

If hunger is your problem... I have found lower carbs help a LOT.
I did NOT say "no carb"... just low carb helped me.
But that is just me... find what works for you and then stick to it... we will be here for you for support.

[wundawoman]

Some folks see gastric bypass as a panacea, the ultimate cure for overweight, and yes, the media plays up all the success stories. Does anyone really think that Carnie Wilson is a happy person now that she's lost weight via bypass? She may be happier than she was, but I'll be that she still suffers from a lot of personal demons.

And believe it or not, some folks can gain weight back even after a bypass! They can slowly stretch their "pouch," allowing them to eat more or they can take in additional calories by consuming calorie dense foods, like milkshakes and ice cream. And don't forget, the surgery is not reversible. You'd have to get used to the idea that you would never be able to eat like a normal person at any time in your life.

The ultimate secret is move more, eat less and slowly replace bad habits and choices with good ones. Sure, you won't lose the fabled "30 lbs. in 30 days," but if you stick with it, you can lose weight at a comfortable, safe speed and have a much better chance of keeping it off. Bypass is only for those whose lives hang in the balance because of their weight and have no other recourse.

Good luck with whatever you choose, but do what is right for you and only you -- not what your MIL tells you.

[QuilterInVA]

My secret was to ban white sugar, flour, rice, pasta from the house and replace it with the good stuff. I gave up the sweets and switched to SF pudding, yogurt and jello when I needed a dessert. My ultimate treat is popcorn. I follow WW and walk 2 miles everyday. I limit carbs and have a bite of protein with my snacks and they seem to satisfy me better. Keeping a journal is the best thing, even if you aren't on a program. It makes you aware of what you eat...Write BEFORE you Bite. Also make a note of how you were feeling before and after eating. It can help you find patterns. Also find other outlets than using food for comfort, treats, etc.

[missmoreish]

DO NOT LISTEN TO YOUR MIL

I have the Mother - in - law from ****!!!! Not only does she hate the fact, that I have her son, she hates me full stop. Any little dig she can have about my weight she does, but as I tell her "I can lose the weight", "You cant afford the Plastic Surgery" soon shuts her up!!!!!

Love yourself, forget her, and take one day at a time, because you are worth it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!