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Old 04-13-2011, 04:06 PM   #14
beerab
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Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: California
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MusicalJess View Post
Its just that we went to his cousins wedding the other week and his parents and sister kept comparing it to his wedding in front of me. I got really upset then too.
His family was inconsiderate to do that but just realize they probably didn't mean to do it and if they did then don't let them get to you. People always compare weddings, it happens. I'd just let your bf know how you felt and hopefully in the future if you go to another wedding he can say "can we not compare my wedding right now?" and even just getting up and dancing with you can diffuse that situation without causing issues.

Quote:
Originally Posted by MusicalJess View Post
I know that we'll struggle to get married in a church with him having been married before and he has said that when we do get married he just wants to keep it small. But my family always have big traditional weddings. I want everyone to see the man I'm spending my life with. I want the "perfect wedding". All the trimmings, if you know what I mean. Its difficult not to want to place blame on the woman who got there first for taking that away from you.
Why is she taking that away from you? You aren't engaged, you haven't planned a wedding, etc. If you want a big wedding then have a big wedding.

So what if your bf says he wants to keep it small? That's where communication is key.

Tell him it's going to be your only wedding, tell him what you told us, how important it is to you and your family, if he's a great guy he'll understand and what you to have the wedding of your dreams.

Compromise also comes in here (compromise is a huge thing when it comes to marriage). If cost is a problem a big wedding doesn't have to cost a fortune. I had 200 people at my wedding and by keeping all costs down I was able to spend only $15,000 (which my parents paid). If your family wants a huge wedding for you then hopefully they are willing to pay for it so it doesn't put stress on you or your bf.

Girl you need to relieve some stress I hope you feel better talking it out and maybe this weekend you can do something to alleviate some stress!
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