well girls, i suck. I have been lying to myself that i would actually put some effort into loosing weight.....i still find myself eating fast food and i sneak brownies and other junk food and then tell myself ill do better tomorrow. Yeah right! I havent even been excersizing. Ive walked like one day this week...for 5 mins! Whats wrong with me! I have no motivation. I have no will power. I am starting to get depressed. I cried last night. I feel so lazy and stupid.
I think you answered your own question....no motivation.
Motivation is extremely personal and I find, though I can feed off others for inspiration, their motivation is not always my motivation and their point of being fed up is very different from mine.
I'm not really sure what else to offer you except keep trying!!! Start small and grow from there. Don't try to make one huge lifestyle change in one day or even one week. I started out exercising a few times a week, then I began counting calories, then I began to concentrate on measuring and weighing my food. Then I began to weed out a lot of junk food and empty calories when I saw that a lot of foods I was eating couldn't sustain my energy needed for exercise. Little by little, these changes began to show on the scale and in my clothes.
I'm sure you're not lazy or stupid! One huge thing you need to work on is your INNER appearance!!!! Those voices and that attitude is NO GOOD! I doubt ANY of us here at 3FC got it exactly right the first time, it took a lot of patience and trial and error to find what works individually.
Do you watch that show I Use to Be Fat on Mtv? I think you need to watch the latest episode with Daria. She did the exact same thing. She allowed herself cheat days and was NOT following her diet. In the end she got herself together and did what she needed to do. That has been one of my FAVORITE episodes because it shows just how difficult it is to lose weight. We always find times where we lose our motivation and start lying to ourselves.
Maybe you're trying to change too many things and your binges are a result of that.
Instead of trying to do better, why don't you give yourself 21 days to change a bad habit to a healthy one?
For example, an easy one is to drink more water. Or you could tell yourself you can eat whatever you want, but you MUST get 5 servings of fruits and vegetables every day. Eat a brownie, eat an apple, have a burger, eat a salad.
I think sometimes trying to make so many changes at once is a recipe for disaster. If you just try one new healthy habit a month, by the end of the year, you'll have 11 new healthy habits and with that, you may have the motivation to finish losing the rest of your weight.
Well you find within you enough motivation to come on here and seek help, obviously losing weight is something you really want. Ask yourself why you don't feel like you deserve to be happy and healthy? Ask yourself why you keep punishing yourself? Ask yourself why you don't feel you are important enough to do what you need to do?
I wish there was some magic word I could say to you. That there was some quick fix out there that would give you the results you want without any of the work. I'm sorry to say that sort of thing doesn't exist.
You need to stop looking at everyone else around you. Stop blaming the food or making excuses for yourself. Take control of your life and just do what you know you need to do. No one else can do that for you.
For me, I kept trying but wasn't willing to actually stick through and do what was needed. I had motivation, but not the commitment to follow through on that. When I got committed, I found that I had "willpower" I'd never known I had before.
The tough part is figuring out why we can't make that commitment. I've had a regain and am struggling with re-making that commitment myself.
well girls, i suck. I have been lying to myself that i would actually put some effort into loosing weight.....i still find myself eating fast food and i sneak brownies and other junk food and then tell myself ill do better tomorrow. Yeah right! I havent even been excersizing. Ive walked like one day this week...for 5 mins! Whats wrong with me! I have no motivation. I have no will power. I am starting to get depressed. I cried last night. I feel so lazy and stupid.
Remember this feeling! USE IT to motivate yourself. That's what I've been doing and it's working. Write down these feelings and keep them at your fridge. READ them when you're feeling the urge to eat unhealthy.
Other than that, swap good foods for unhealthy foods as much as possible. Cannonelli and black beans - whole wheat pastas and breads - beleive it or not, healthy food decreases cravings. Think "I CAN DO THIS!"
hang in there, you can't fail if you don't quit trying . . .
I agree with rana . . . BABY STEPS . . . make a plan. example:
Week 1: Drink 16 oz more water EVERYDAY
Week 2: Continue drinking more water and add an apple or banana or pear or carrot sticks for an afternoon snack (even if you're not hungry, eat it!)
Week 3: Continue water, snack and while I'm watching TV I will stand up and march/walk until the commercials are OVER . . .
Week 4: Continue the above and add a healthy morning snack, fruit, veggies, yogurt, a protein bar . . .
Week 5: All the above and only eat fast food 2 or 3 or 5 times a week, depending how many times you eat fast food now . . . and I will make a healthy meal instead (there are great recipes on the recipes thread, and most are quite EASY)
Write it all down on the calendar, the thing(s) you are going to change that week . . . buy the little stars that teachers have and put it on the calendar when you accomplished the goal for that day . . . YOU ARE NOT PERFECT, none of us are so there will be days without stars, but in time there will be more and more stars or check marks, something where you can see the progress and say "hey, look, I did really well this week . . . 4 stars and maybe the next week it will be 5 stars . . .
and continue from there . . .
I still allow myself 5 dark chocolate kisses EVERYDAY (No I don't get to save them up, it's a use or lose deal) It's more of a mental thing for me, the fact that I CAN have chocolate . . . and I have a cookie or a piece of cake once in a while, I used to be able to eat a bag of hershey kisses in a 4-5 days . . . now a bag lasts me a couple months . . . but I have them because when I reach my goal chocolate, cookies, cake, pizza and all the other things that are out there will be eaten on occasion and I don't want my body to have a panic attack
Look for one of the challenges and join: there are some for St Paddy's day, Easter, Summer, Memorial day . . . and I'm sure there are others that will be coming . . .
You said " I only walked for 5 min" well that's 5 min more than if you had been sitting on the couch. There is a woman in one of the challenges who is sooooo happy that she can walk 1 mile, she said she is huffing and puffing and wheezing at the end, but she does it, it's all she can do for now, and she is TRYING so I know she won't fail
so you have to decide . . . Am I going to try??? or Am I going to give up?? Since you posted here I think you are going to try . . . at least I hope . . . there is great support here and motivational pics for people who have lost 50, 60, 100 and over 100 pounds . . . the pics are AMAZING and they all started with BABY STEPS . . .
I totally agree with Mz. Juicy! Looking at all of the "I did it!" stories posted on here did it for me! I only work out for 4 hours a week so it doesn't feel as daunting a task to undertake. I also eat 6 times a day and feel as if I cheat 2 of those 6 but they are completely legal foods
There's nothing more motivating that those stories. That's what FINALLY got me started and on the right track. Not to mention the quote "The time will pass anyways. Do something with it." I've found myself thinking MANY times. If I would have just started, I would be _____ now!
Maybe you're trying to change too many things and your binges are a result of that.
Instead of trying to do better, why don't you give yourself 21 days to change a bad habit to a healthy one?
For example, an easy one is to drink more water. Or you could tell yourself you can eat whatever you want, but you MUST get 5 servings of fruits and vegetables every day. Eat a brownie, eat an apple, have a burger, eat a salad.
I think sometimes trying to make so many changes at once is a recipe for disaster. If you just try one new healthy habit a month, by the end of the year, you'll have 11 new healthy habits and with that, you may have the motivation to finish losing the rest of your weight.
I agree with this because it's so true. When there are so many bad habits all mixed up together, trying to give them all up at once can be too daunting. I used to binge eat too. First, I got that under control. Second, I used to hide foods, I stopped that too. I used to prefer 'junk' over wholesome meals, I learned how to cook better wholesome food. I basically had one 'bad' meal a day left (plus too many carbs) and I'm finding I was ready to deal with that.
That stuff took me YEARS to get there (and there was a lot of stress in those years too), but I'm there NOW and NOW I'm ready to commit to this, but before, I had too many unresolved issues that needed addressing first.
And remember, EVERY right decision is also helping. So, you had a brownie, you can still exercise! Or, you ate really well today, but don't feel like exercising, OK, but at least you ate well. That is FAR better than saying, "I messed up this ONE thing so now, to heck with ALL of it." It is so true, every right step, is a step to getting healthier and beating yourself up about issues you are still dealing with, is not going to help you.
Hey, you are not stupid! Motivation is a hard thing to keep sometimes, but every day is a new chance! If you need to take a break, really think about your weight goals and your plan then come back, then do it. You can't be so hard on yourself. Not a single one of us here are perfect. We all have times when we mess up. Sending lots of s your way!
Plan, plan, plan: just hoping to "do better" is a recipe for shame and guilt. Don't say "Tomorrow I will make healthy choices"--make the choices RIGHT NOW: "Tomorrow I will have X for breakfast, Y for lunch, and Z for dinner. My snacks will be A, B, and C". Make sure NOW that you have everything you need for all that. Then, tomorrow plan the next day.
As others have said, motivation is a personal thing. My motivation is to wear a beautiful dress to prom. After that, I'm considering looking around for summer dresses or bathing suits.
I love fashion and clothing... but because I'm never able to wear what I see as fashionable... or when I do they are horribly uncomfy... I wear jeans and t-shirts. My motivation is to wear beautiful clothing and to love how I look in them.
My Dad had the motivation six years ago to lose around 80 to 100 lbs because of health reasons. He was diagnosed with Meneare's (sp?) disease, and had lost over 70% of hearing in his right ear, and was having vertigo attacks daily. There was no cure, the only thing that might help would be to lose weight. So he did.
It took me a while to really latch onto my motivation. And it's always changing. *hugs*
Other people here have given AWESOME advice. It's all a personal journey though. What works for one person doesn't necessarily work for another. Either mentally or physically.
Others have suggested baby steps; I'm going to go out on a little bit of a limb and say that it's sometimes easier to make all your necessary changes at once. For some people, making a small change each week or month has led to big transformative changes over time, so it's certainly one possibility--but so is just jumping in there.
Little changes didn't work for me because I invariably wanted to do/eat the very thing I said I would no longer do/eat, as I was focused on it. I felt like I was hacking away at my lifestyle with nothing to fill the holes I left. This time, I instead made one concerted push and it's working for me.
What made this different is that everything I was doing, I saw as an addition, not a subtraction. I added exercise, whole grain foods, fruit, vegetables, home-cooked meals. (That happened to coincide with subtracting stuff, but I was so focused on the additions that I didn't see the subtractions as much.)
You don't suck and you're neither lazy nor stupid. You just haven't quite found the thing that will pry you out of your comfortable rut and plop you down in the weight-loss groove instead. Trust me, I'm an incredibly lazy person, yet I haven't strayed from my plan once because it's now become my "new normal." I formed a new, more health-conscious rut, you could say. I used my laziness and inertia to my own benefit.
I'm 41. It took me so many years to find out what works for me. Keep looking; you'll find what works for you. There are so many paths to losing weight and better health that one of them has to be your perfect way. Just focus on that and not on feeling miserable for yesterday. The mistakes you made then are just learning experiences for today.
I think someone else said it, but don't try a lifestyle over haul. I am guilty of doing this too. It used to feel like those preformers at the circus that balance spinning plates on poles. I felt like I suddenly had to keep like 10 plates from falling off those poles and crashing to the floor. Its overwhelming!
Do you think those preformers start by spinning all the those plates at one time? of course not! They start with one plate. And practice until they are comfortable, then add two...and so on.
Pick one thing. Some people prefer to start with exercising, other prefer to change eating habits then add in exercise later. I usually start with eating habits. If you are used to eating 2-3 brownies a day (um don't laugh, because unrestrained with brownies in the house, I can easily eat 2-3 a day...) or maybe you get fast food several times a week. Pick one goal a week. I will only get fash food once this week. Then next week, kep that goal, add a new one.
I don't know if I'm explaining it right. But if we are usedto one type of life style, its very hard too wake up one day and over haul your old habits.
Now some people do very well with complete change. But if you find that its not working start small. One plate at a time.
guess im just lying 2 myself
