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Old 11-19-2010, 02:12 AM   #1  
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Default Frustrated & Venting

Want to get something off my chest to people who have no connection to anyone involved. And to people who will have an unbias opinion.

I've been a bit grouchy about work lately. My employer has a tendency to not treat everyone the same- what is good for one is not always good for everyone else. Last week I wasn't feeling the greatest, I had a bit of a head cold and chest cold, but I still came into work. When I got in that particular morning I find out my co-worker called in with a sinus headache. A sinus headache? Seriously...? I mean, I know headaches suck, but geez... suck it up!
The next day I'm a trooper and come into work. However, during the night I was unfortunate to add the symptom of diarrhea to the list of other symptoms. All the same, I grabbed my cold meds and a bottle of Imodium and headed off to work. My co-worker managed to show up that day, so I was a bit relieved. After getting a few hours into the shift I've made a trip or two to the bathroom. The imodium is helping, but I still don't want to play a symphony or gas people out of the bathroom. (TMI, sorry... but true feelings there folks. lol) So, I ask my supervisor if I could go home sick. He ask why and I tell him, straight up, I have the poops. (We're friends, I can be frank with him) He then tells me to "Wait it out." WAIT IT OUT?! I was pretty mad at that... my co-worker called in the day before with a sinus-headache, other co-workers have called in with even more asinine excuses then that, and I have diarrhea and I can't go home?
After about 45 minutes he comes up and ask me how I'm doing. So, I act like my mother -all passive aggressive like- and tell him I'm fine. He then ask if I still wanted to go home and at this point I raised my voice and said, "No, I'm staying!"

Anywho... during my shift that day I asked my co-worker if the next week I could take off. She was perfectly fine with that. That night as I was leaving I asked the person who would be my supervisor during the time I wanted off if I could take off. She basically told me no! She said she didn't want to have to deal with my co-worker by herself. (She was being frank because she too is a friend) I was mad and hurt... how can others take off or be sick and it's ok but I can't? All the same I agreed to work.

So, the past two days were the days I had wanted off. When I came in my co-worker asked why I was there. I couldn't tell her "because the supervisor didn't want to work with you" so I just told her they wouldn't let me. She too was upset for me, but that's neither here nor there.

Yesterday as we are working the supervisor keeps getting upset at us workers. She's having personal issues and has been getting upset quite easily, but typically apologizes afterwards. I understand she's having problems, but if we aren't the ones causing the pain why should we be the ones to get the brunt of her emotions?
Anyhow... she is in my work space with a few other workers. We are all talking and I am helping them find information. One of the workers then asked me where I got my "shank water bottle." (The water was an off brand with a label from a local restaurant) We then all begin to tease him, as we all typically would, about him indirectly calling me a skank. (so, basically, no hard feelings... just light-hearted teasing) One of the other workers mentioned how he liked skanks and I jokingly said that must be why we get along so well. Then the supervisor gets mad at me and tells me that no one else is calling me a skank and I'm bringing it upon myself. Did she just forget how moments prior she was teasing the worker who call my water bottle skanky and how she said he indirectly called me skanky?
I stopped dead in my tracks with that conversation and start finding the information they are looking for. And I'm getting mad. I mad about not being able to go home sick, I'm mad about not being able to take off, I'm mad about her getting mad at everyone because of her own issues, I'm mad because the worker called my water skanky. (the last one is dumb to be mad about because we all were joking... but it was like I snapped, I was mad and was going to be mad about everything and anything)
The supervisor kept asking for information on certain people but kept getting frustrated because I didn't know which person (I'm sorry, if you ask for info on a John Smith I'm going to have a lot of results) or because I didn't know the proper spelling and had to ask her. So I growled at her to hand me the paperwork so I could do my job without having her getting mad when I need a clarification.
I take the paperwork and continuing doing my job of looking up the info. As I'm doing this I realize that the worker who was wanting it wasn't even documenting what I was telling him! (This worker is the same one who called my water bottle skanky) So I get angry and I growl at him about not writing anything down and asked why I was doing all this work for nothing. He tries to retort but I'm angry and won't have it. Everyone besides my co-worker walks out. (poor thing can't... she's stuck with me now. lol)
After a few minutes he comes back in the room and ask me for the information on the people. I ask him if he plans on writing it down or how he is wanting the information. He tells me he doesn't know. (which does nothing more then make me even more mad) Through clinched teeth I say, "Once you decide what you want from me, I will do my job and get you the information. You have to decide what you want and how you want it because I am not going to waste my time doing something that you are not going to use or document."


*sigh* It feels good to get that out. I know I wrote a lot and heck, I'm ok if no one reads it or replies... it just feels good to get it out.
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Old 11-19-2010, 01:25 PM   #2  
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i think we work for the same damn place. and i'm sorry for you. I hope it gets better, but knowing how it is at my place, it just won't.

i always promise myself i'm not going to take the time to get to know the people i work with at my new job and then 5 years later i'm dealing with everyone and their personal problems.

i have also recently been turned down for time off i requested and i am constantly dealing w/ trying to teach one person how to do things and him looking at me in that same way a dog looks at you with their head tilted sideways and you know they just don't comprehend. sigh.

work sucks.
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Old 11-19-2010, 10:04 PM   #3  
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Lots of hugs!

I've been in that position many times
where people are just being jerks and
it takes all you've got to refrain from
ripping their heads off!

I wanted to point out a couple of things:

- It is messed up that people are
calling in for petty things and you can't
even get a day off to relieve your illness.

- How crazy is it that your supervisor gets
mad at you during the conversation! She was,
after all, just joining in on the tease two
minutes prior.

- What you said about your supervisor getting
upset at you all because of her own personal
issues, well, it kinda sounds like you're doing the
same thing to your co-worker. You have good
reason to be upset and frustrated. But just
remember to take a couple deep breaths!

I think what you need most is a warm bubble
bath, hot tea or coffee, and some rest. Maybe
watch a movie and give yourself some time
to relax. Go to bed early or find any time during
the day to take a nap and go back to work
refreshed. You can do this! Good luck!
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Old 11-20-2010, 03:12 AM   #4  
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Thanks guys for commenting.

Lizzie- I know that feeling. When newbies come in I have been having to train them and sometimes I feel like teaching a rock might be easier. (Starting to think it's time to take a break from it and let someone else train.)

Ciao- You are right, I was taking my anger out on my co-worker. I don't feel bad for being angry (it's my emotions, I can feel the way I want to feel) but I do feel bad for being angry at him. (If that makes any sense at all...)
And yes, I agree, a break would be nice. One to just relax in.

After I wrote this post and went to bed I had a stress dream. It's just proof I need to let it go and relax. Thanks guys for listening.
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Old 11-20-2010, 03:58 PM   #5  
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I think dealing with people in the work place is difficult, and as hard as it can be sometimes, you have to let certain things slide off your back.

your boss didn't give the best response about letting you go home when you were sick, maybe for personal reasons or maybe frustration over the other workers who DO stay home for spotty reasons. when she came back and offered to let you, I think it would have been a good choice to say, thanks, maybe I will, I appreciate it. You could have gone home and recovered and felt less passive aggressive and victimy (never a good way to deal in an office).

and while an office can and should be a friendly place, I think it helps everyone involved to avoid going places that can possibly offend people (even having the topic of someone being a "skank" come up).

believe me, people who are cranky (supervisors as well as coworkers) will appreciate it when you take the high road and don't grouse back, and it will make you look good as a worker. I know that can be easier said than done sometimes! and of course there will be moments when you might have to deal directly with someone crossing the line (or go to a supervisor to handle it if it happens again and again and the person isn't responsive)

it's a work place, and that means yeah, you can feel however you like, but it's a good idea to keep your higher career goals in mind (you always ideally want to come across as professional and productive). plus, it's good for your own peace of mind.
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Old 11-21-2010, 05:02 PM   #6  
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and when all else fails- there's always a good letter opener office eye gouging to make you feel better. hahaha. i kid, but really i sympathize and i hope it gets better.

i have work nightmares all the time too.

i know this is dumb- but this little guy has saved me more times than i can count. just looking at him bobbing his head back and forth all happy and smiling can really just make you feel better.

http://www.amazon.com/s?ie=UTF8&rh=n...Zoku%20&page=1

of course, i have a menagerie of critters at my desk and silly comics and things to stare at and cheer me up when someone is screaming at me on the phone or i'm around ready to use a brick to "teach" someone how to do their job. when all else fails a nice brisk walk around the building usually does the trick. of course for me the key is not to be smoking while i'm doing that. haha.
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