I look at other women who are about my size and shape and frequently think lude and lascivious thoughts . I find other women of my general body shape to be very attractive Then I look at me and think, blech I'm fat! What the heck? There is something wrong with this situation. Then I feel worse because of this odd disconnect I have going on here. It is a mean vicious cycle of self judging and confusion. Anyone else have this issue? Anyone have any luck sorting it out?
I think this is actually a lot more common than you would believe. I am a fairly active member of the 'fat acceptance' community, and there is an odd dynamic in place in a lot of relationships.
You see a lot of bodybuilder types going after bigger girls, finding the curves and shape, softness etc enticing. It might be the contrast, it might be an admiration of the indulgence that the women obviously give in to.
Who knows? But it isn't weird at all, or even that rare. tbh, it boils down to the fact that we don't control what we find to be beautiful, we only know the urge to connect with what has become sexualized for us.
I myself dig a curvy girl, I don't like the rail thin type.
i think it just depends on what you are attracted to. i don't like skinny girls. don't find them attractive, i feel like i would break them if i gave them a hug. i like girls who "have meat on their bones" a woman who is healthy, and i tend to lean towards HWP people, but to me, that is healthy, which is where i want to be.
I find this happening as well, it's kinda weird to me, but you can't help what's attractive to you
But yeah...I have low confidence anyway, so that's probably a reason as to why, and I think you look better the more confidence you have (not always)
Well, to be perfectly frank, at my age I don't get lewd and lascivious thoughts very often -- too exhausting! Besides, I've been with my partner for nearly 24 years and haven't touched another woman in all that time. I still love looking at her -- fat dimples and all!
BUT ... as I grew older, I found that a woman's size was less and less relevant to me.
One of the most beautiful women I knew was extremely overweight (5'4" or so and probably close to 250 lbs). She was one of the most compassionate, funny, generous and loving people you'd ever meet. I was her friend for more than two decades and when she died last November, it was a real wake up call for me. I know her weight was a major factor in her death.
So, to me, losing weight doesn't necessarily equate with being more attractive, but simply to staying around longer and being healthier.
Having said all that high-faluting stuff ... I have to admit that I do NOT find very very skinny women attractive at all. Or the real body builder types. So, I suppose I *do* consider physical looks a part of attractiveness after all.
Well for me I don't think there's an age factor. Even as a teen I preferred plumper girls. One of the girls I dated in high school was 4'11" and though she would never tell anyone the actual number on the scale I'm guessing she was somewhere between 250 and 300 at the time. Even then I worried about her health, but to me she was gorgeous. I've never had much success with weight loss before now though, so I've never had to deal with this confusing double standard I apparently hold.
Another crazy thing - while I am still not attracted to the real skinny girls or the over the top body builder types, the somewhat muscled women have become more and more attractive to me the more fit I become. Before this journey began I would never have been attracted to people with a Jillian Michaels type body, now I find her and others built like her rather hot (still not as much as a chubby girl though - hehe). For me it's happening with men too. I used to be kinda grossed out by men built like Vin Diesel. The other night I actually said "you know, he's kinda cute there". ACK!! What's happening to me? LOL
I wouldn't consider myself bi-sexual, but, I do find other females sexually attractive; Just not to the point that I would want to have sex with them. ( Although, I have experimented. )
Anyway, as for me, I actually like the skinny girls. Something about them pleases me. They often look very fragile, and delicate. Yum!
Funny enough, I also like heavy girls. I guess I'm just easy to please!
( Of course, it all boils down to how they carry themselves, confidence, and their overall "style." )
Forgot to mention... The bodybuilders scare me. LOL. Women, and men. They're just too hard, and not aesthetically pleasing!
Last edited by Technosexual; 01-27-2010 at 04:54 PM.
Reason: Added something!
I seem to be drawn to women of a specific type. Between 5'7 & 5'10, healthy body (not skinny, not fat) and usually blonde (prefer curly hair).
It isn't that I don't think heavier women are beautiful, because there are some that will knock your socks off, but I just don't prefer that.
I myself hate my body and I'm attracted more to women who have a body similar to the one I want. There are a couple models from SG who are considered plus-sized and they have gorgeous bodies, but they are also toned. But really it comes down to the person, personalities can affect how attractive a woman is.
But honestly, my ideal woman would be between 5'3-6', toned, but not overly skinny, with nice curves. And I'm a sucker for brunettes and redheads.
I myself hate my body and I'm attracted more to women who have a body similar to the one I want. There are a couple models from SG who are considered plus-sized and they have gorgeous bodies, but they are also toned. But really it comes down to the person, personalities can affect how attractive a woman is.
But honestly, my ideal woman would be between 5'3-6', toned, but not overly skinny, with nice curves. And I'm a sucker for brunettes and redheads.
But really, I'm not picky at all.
I've seen some pretty heavy women who look gorgeous because they've had all of their cellulite airbrushed! LOL! Wish I could airbrush mine out in real life!
I definitely agree with the personality thing.
I'm very proud of you for your Suicide Girls goal, by the way. I met a girl in real life who was trying to get her pictures on there. Not sure if she ever did. She was super skinny, but not very attractive in the face.
Last edited by Technosexual; 01-28-2010 at 07:27 AM.
I def. love the meat on the bones look. But, too much meat and I am not interested either. I know, I am not attracted to someone my height and weight. What does this say about me?
Love the c*ck (hehe)...but when I have hooked up with girls they have always been thin! And I would say closer to the body type I would want....well, i guess that I did have at the time! I think you can be more comfortable when you aren't comparing yourself to the other person. If you just think "we're both hot and this is going to be hot" then you are sure to have a good time
I'm more attracted to smaller girls, not rail thin, but slender and soft with nice curves. It's funny, I like girls who look rather delicate but I like my men tall and buff!
I third the redheads! Lately I've noticed that I've been drooling over more and more redheads. It's just so sexy to me!
Edit: On the other hand, my current (non celeb ) girl crush is a thick girl. But really, how can I resist her? She basically oozes sex and is a great kisser! Sorry if that's TMI.
Question for lesbians and bi chicks
. I find other women of my general body shape to be very attractive Then I look at me and think, blech I'm fat! What the heck? There is something wrong with this situation. Then I feel worse because of this odd disconnect I have going on here. It is a mean vicious cycle of self judging and confusion. Anyone else have this issue? Anyone have any luck sorting it out?
