Greetings everyone.
I have been reading here everyday but haven't posted in a while. Giant,fat free, sugar free cudos to all you super hard workers.
I'm soooooo happy for you all.
Even those having tough times, you still come back. Thats a super move for your peace of mind. It means to me that you haven't given up.
That speaks volumes to the support felt here from every one, new and old. Thank you every one.
This last Monday was my WI and I was up almost a pound. After the first second of disapointment, I realized I was more puzzled than upset.
I have worked consciencely at changing what I eat. So I began back tracking to see why I was up when I was sure I should have been down. I had been working for about 3 to 4 weeks on changing what I eat before I weighed in for the first time. I'm sure I had lost the water and the first pounds before I had a starting point. So when I WI and had lost 9 pouds in a week it was actully fat and not much water. I had been working on shrinking my stomach before I started WIs. After I saw the 9 lbs. off, I cut back unconsciesely on what was already 1/2 or less calories than my normal (waayy too many)
intake. I decided that I had a gain because my poor body finally went into shock
and put a hold on the fat for later since I was starving. It was weird for me because in the past I would have beat myself up and given up.
But instead, I problem solved for myself, add some calories back to my plan and started trying to walk a little bit. I still feel succsessful. I know that I'll have a good suprise next Monday at my WI.
Sabatage: hhmmm, isn't that a common thread for us all. What I've learned in my experiance is that with my loving family, I taught them to love me with food. Treats, super meals,filling a craving, this is how mom will be happy. And it never failed. "AAHHH how sweet of you to think of me while you were at the mall" " wow, how'd you know I wanted THAT for dinner?" I can't tell you how many times I've just said outloud, " boy I want a candy bar" and DH (who tips at 160 lbs) would just disappear and show up with 3 or 4 differnt candy bars because I hadn't said what kind of candy I wanted. I know it was what I taught him would make me smile. Now that I have changed the rules on him, its hard for him to know how to make me smile when I'm frustraited. As I'm learning new things that can make me react positive I have to teach him too. I know its not done to ruin my hard work, just trying to find a good way to support me.
Other sabatours have been friends. They know what I like is usually the same things they like so lets be bad together. In the past, that was fine with me. Thats how I thought for them too. Now I've changed the rules on them too. Now Its my job to help them know the new things I like so we can stay connected. Just changing the things we eat changes the dynamics of the relationships we made while we were being mean to ourselves. Now part of us is differnt and we have to figure out how to include those people that are inportant to us with out making them feel we're better/superior to them. I personally know people that lost large amounts of weight and became preachers of THE MISSION to reform all fat people. I tend to cross the street to avoid those lectures. And I try sooo hard not to be one either.
Well, I've ranted on long enough, I hope I made some sence here. Feed back is gladly welcome.
Have a super strong day. Thanks for hearing my jabber.