300+ and Ready to Try Again... #696
 

WELCOME !!!

We are a group of individuals who weigh or have weighed 300+, or near there. This group was formed to provide a place for others like us to find support and hope. We are aware of the distinct problems that come with weighing over 300 lbs.

We want to invite everyone to join us in our journey.
We share laughter and tears.
We share what works for us and what doesn't.
We often use a "Topic of the Day" for discussion.

Motivational Monday
Tuesday Tips
Wednesday Wish List .. and What you are doing to obtain it.
Thankful Thursday
FUN Friday ... don't wait until you lose your weight.
Sit-up Saturdays - any physical activity
Share your Success Sunday

These are not required topics ...just ideas to share. We often find them very helpful. We also share heartaches and fears ... joys and celebrations.

We have several extra threads going on simutaneously such as Monthly Challenges, Weekly Weigh-ins, Recipes, Bios, and more. Please feel free to check them all out.

We have a bi-weekly 2x2 Challenge.
Our goal is to lose 2 lbs in 2 weeks.
We have a long term goal of losing 300+ lbs within our 300+ group in 2005.

We have found this thread to be more than just a support group...
we have found it to become a home. We invite you to join us.

Graduation Photos
 

I have put the link to my graduation photos in the pictures pages, so you can see them. This is the first time since I was very small that I have had absolutely no issues with anyone taking my photo. For once, I didn't focus on the shortcomings of my body, but rather the reason they wanted to take the photos - the success of the day!

Leanne

Leanne... CONGRATULATIONS !!!! Your pictures were WONDERFUL !!!
I am soooo poud of you .. and HAPPY for you too. :bravo:
Your smile made me smile from ear to ear too. :D
And congratulations on your PhD scholarship too. :cp: You did not say if you were going for it or not. ???

Jen... I had missed your photo too. I love seeing faces with names. What a cutie.

I will be ... I forget everyone doesn't know everything ever said on these threads. :o sorry
Barb can give you total story... but basicly... BarbPA is in the process of IVF and she has to have injections daily by her husband. Well.. the nurse drew bullseyes on her butt so he would know exactly where to give each injection. :lol: We were teasing her that once she gets pregnant she should tatoo a bullseye on her butt as a permanent reminder/keepsake of their efforts.

Angela... {{{ HUGS }}}
I am so sorry for your loss and what you are having to go through.

Wish I had to time to reply to more... but gotta run. Spent too much time reading and looking at Leannes wonderful Graduation photos.

WAY TO GO LEANNE !!!!!!

Hi ladies -

Another sunny day here in Northern New England, yay! I got a few jobs lined up for next week. Bunch of mystery shops and an audit gig at radio shack, to name a few.

Angela, I read your post past night and was speachless, I had no idea how to respond or do your words justice. It is always hard to find the words when someone gives you news like that. Just know that if you need someone to listen or to talk to, we're all here. I don't know what I'd do if the man I'm in love with left me without warning. :(

Leanne - NICE PICS!! You look so radiant and happy, your pics made my day. Congratulations...so how was YOUR day yesterday? Did you get whatever you wanted? Hehe...I always think of days like that that are a special occasion for me as "my" day...

Helloooo to everyone else out there who posted in the last thread...gah I can't remember who addressed me and who didn't....I had flipping between threads, I'm so bad at it.

Today on my agenda is my two mile walk and my Denise Austin Weights...yay!!!

Rachel, you out there? Say hello.

Take care gals,

Mel

As some of you may know, I have been dealing with the plateau from ****. It started last November when I started to walk for the first time in eight years. I tried increasing exercise, decreasing calories, increasing calories. I tried everything except voodoo dolls. If I had known where to contact a witch doctor, I probably would have tried that too. I've been dancing up and down with the same 5 pounds for the last ten weeks. I don't think it would have been so bad if I had been cheating. At least then I could have something to blame. Working hard and having nothing to show for it is just about the biggest soul killer. My doctor tried to explain that your body conserves calories while you are putting on lean body mass. Once your body thinks it has enough lean body mass stored up, then it lets you start to burn fat again. All I really heard was blah, blah, blah. I think it went in the same part of my ear that used to "hear" "if you lose weight, you will feel better," or "you have such a pretty face, if you'd just lose weight." Anyway, out of the blue I lost 5 pounds this week, the two I gained last week plus 3 more. I am holding my breath to see if maybe I am over the plateau. I'm almost afraid to have hope about it. I'm going to chalk it up to the swimming.

It gave me the courage to do something that I've been thinking about for awhile. One of my long term goals is to get married. It's one of those things that I just never figured was in the cards for me. I had told myself when I got down to goal weight that I would give it another try. I had a speaker at an OA meeting years ago who talked about how overweight people are always thinking about how their lives will start just as soon as they lose weight, and they lose track of the fact that their lives are going on whether they are fat or not. So I signed up for a Catholic match service. I even had the courage to check the box next to "heavyset" and post a picture. We will see. So many of you ladies have husbands that I finally realized that maybe there are some guys out there who can look past the outside to see the inside.

:dancer: CONGRATULATIONS Catherine :cb:

:bravo: You persevered and stuck out the long wait (weight?) while you suffered thru the plateau and it looks like you broke it. :grouphug:

It makes me so glad to see someone move forward rather than just sit and have a private pity party. You seem to be super committed to living a sane, healthy, life and rejoining society as you close the housebound chapter of your life.


Angela, What can I say except that I'm so very sorry for your loss. This is when it's hard to be just an online friend who can't be there to listen and offer aid and sympathy in this sad time for you. {{{hugs}}}

Catherine - That's so great, and you will get matches, I promise you. They may not be the most attractive fish in the sea, but they will have hearts of gold. I love my boyfriend to death, and do not know what I'd do without him. I never had a boyfriend before him, I'd never really dated either, other than a few blind dates. There are people out there that do not take your external appearance into consideration, and it's nice when you find them.

Thanks to everyone that's offered me support. I am feeling better, by the way.

I'm looking into natural remedies for depression, like St. John's Wort, and I'm looking back into some self-help books again. I haven't had any medical insurance in years, and that makes it hard.

I'm just remembering the state of mind I was in several years back when I was losing weight like crazy. I went through a horribly messy accusation and falling out with a friend and I became extremely angry at the world. Something in me snapped. I kept cutting back more and more on food until I decided that I was gonna eliminate all the meat from my diet, and eventually all of the fat as well. And I wondered why I started getting sick. :rolleyes: Yeah, I realize now how unhealthy that was. But I think we can all relate to that desperation of wanting to lose the weight so badly.

And I did lose a lot of weight. People started to notice me, and it kinda freaked me out. I've never had a figure in my life and I don't think I was ready for the extra attention. I was extremely shy at the time, and was still affected by a lot of problems from my childhood. But I was getting weaker and falling deeper and deeper into the depression. I had to give up my beloved swimming because I could barely keep my head above the water. I binged on some deep-fried chicken strips after months of being a vegetarian and had the worst stomach ache I've ever had for two days straight. So I was like, oh :censored: it, I give up! So I went back to my old habits, feeling worse than ever. Of course, I ended up gaining all of it back and then some.

It was maybe a year later that I went to a free depression screening where I gave my life story. The lady was appalled that I'd never gotten counseling before.

The therapy was good for me, but it wiped me out financially. I learned that the strange eating habits that I had attained before was a pretty textbook case of someone looking to gain control over something in their lives to make up for the lack of control felt elsewhere. I remember obsessing over every morsel I put into my mouth. I felt I was in total control, but I obviously wasn't.

I found that I was clinically depressed and was immediately put on medications. I saw the therapist once a week at first barely able to say anything, but eventually learning that I didn't have to feel trapped; life is full of choices that have consequences, both good and bad, and those choices are up to me.

I still have to remind myself, though. Even though it's something I tell the kids every day.

But I ran out of money around the time I seemed to be getting better, so I just stopped going. Sometimes I feel I need to again, but instead I vent in my Live Journal (yeah, I know I need to get cracking with the one here) and meditate and play music and walk and do everything I can to remind myself that I'm gonna get through all this.

And it's strange, but I can feel the urge to repeat history coming on again. Well, at least this time around I'm more informed with it. I just have to take this all one day at a time. I'm also better informed that your body needs a certain amount of fat to function properly and be healthy and that you need to eat, regardless.

I went shopping with my friends and we decided to eat at IHOP. I was very proud of myself for making healthy breakfast choices. But after we had shopped for a while, they decided that they all wanted to go McDonald's for ice cream. I was ready to panic. I didn't want ice cream! I didn't want anything to do with going there! But I didn't want to look like an idiot. I realized that I had a choice of getting the ice cream (a small portion wasn't gonna kill me), making another choice, or not getting anything at all. And I felt so silly for wanting to make a big deal out of it.

I opted for the fruit 'n yogurt parfait, which I had never tried before. If I had been by myself I would have asked for the nutrition information, bit I didn't want anyone in my party rolling their eyes at me. Now that I'm looking at the website, I see that it has a little more sugar than a kid's cone but less fat (I can't find info on the larger cones, though). And hey, at least I finally know where to look for the sugar content (I was looking at the wrong page last time). Anyway, it was pretty darned good, and at least I got a little fruit out of the deal.

So anyway, I don't know what my point is, except that once again, I'm trying to do this one day at a time.

Thanks again for the support.

I once heard that the way to decide if you really want a tattoo is to picture it on your grandmother :lol:

Morning, all. Well, I mean, afternoon, here at least.

Thanks all, for the words of support and encouragement. I'm likely not to talk a lot about it--what I really need is to focus on other things. There will be an inquest in three weeks or so, so I suppose I won't be able to completely ignore things, but I'm working hard on thinking about what I need to be doing. Thank you all for being here.

Leanne--CONGRATULATIONS!!! I am sooooooooo proud of you! :balloons:

Catherine--My fingers are crossed for you. My situation is similar, but not the same--I've been on a plateau, up and down between 290 and 295, since, oh, I dunno, December I guess. In my case, I know it's probably because I've not been exercising. But I know you've been working very hard, and I know eventually it will pay off. I just hope this is the week!

Esmaraude--I think you're doing well articulating what's going on with you... I hope we can help by listening. And good job at McDonald's.... you're right, it wasn't a crisis, now was it?

Yeah, silly me, there was no reason to have a McDonald's panic attack! :dizzy:

Anyway, I just posted some pics over in the picture thread. Photos of me at Christmas and a little bit of my cartoony artwork.

Well, I think I'm gonna make some soup now. :chef:

Hey guys, just wanted to let you know I posted some closeup face pics in the picture thread....I posted body shots last month (on page three) but I didn't have any closup face pics there....I also put some mediocre digital art on there for esmaraude to see.

Now now, don't you dare call it mediocre, MissMeliss, it's actually very cool! :D And it's nice to see more pics of ya!

SHOPAHOLIC AND JULEE :) :)

Yes I would love to meet up with you guys! I replied a while back, but maybe missed it. I live in Southern California, San Bernardino near Cal State. I’ll be sure to you both a pm just in case this reply is missed as well. :)

Thanks for the virgin fat compliments :rofl: Unfortunately, this week has turned into an “Open mouth insert foot” weekend. Uncle Tom and Aunt Flo have decided to drop in for a vacation this weekend. Along with them, came cravings… ICK! I weighed myself this morning and I’m at 352lbs… YIKES! I’m not gonna weigh myself until after the these relatives decide to leave. Hopefully the cravings they bring with them won’t be so bad. This is the only time I really have a craving for chocolate… ugh… I will survive!

Sue…

ooooh...so much to respond to...so I'll take this slowly and hopefully I won't miss anything or anyone.

SO..as if the kitchen sink leaking wasn't quite enough for the weekend...the bar in my closet collapsed and came out of the wall..along with the entire contents of my closet. On the other hand, it was almost like a sign and really happened at a pretty opportune time. I have ben procrastinating for a while on taking boxes of stuff down to my garage storage unit and taking stuff to Goodwill. So in a burst of energy and inspiration yesterday morning, I took all the boxes down (down the stairs...whew) and got everything together for Goodwill and garbage. Then Jason came over..who was pretty impressed that I didn't have a meltdown over the closet thing...and helped me shlep all my clothes to the couch in the living room. And I stood there looking at all of it..and realized how much I don't wear because I don't like, how much I won't wear because it's too big, and how much I just could be OK without...and started tossing stuff to Jason to bag up for Goodwill. I am very proud of myself for gettign rid of it all and for getting everything out of my house. I feel like I have so much more room in the living room (aside from the couch covered in clothing) and even bought a cut corner shelving unit for my Grandmother's cups and saucers, so now the top of the table is clear as well. I also found new dining room chairs at Target that I want. They are $30 each but they are nice and they match everything else. The icky rolling ones that I have now are just gross and one finally broke, so I am having THOSE carted off this week as well. WHEW...spring cleaning!!!

Thin...seeing my friend slowly deteriorate is horrible. The gall bladder surgery was necessitated by the GBS...but for the first year after her GBS she was doing so well. Now she is mid-way through a degree it seems she will nver finish, living at home again with her parents (who are wonderful but stifling), unable to get out and about because of her meds, carless because it just got totalled (she is fine...it's semi-unrelated) and she is just so depressed. I pray all the time that things will somehow turn around for her...that some doctor will get a grip on what a mess she is and find a real way to help her (aside from giving her still more drugs) and that she will be able to get her life back where she so desperately wants it to be.

As far as my dad and the wedding..I decided to enlist the help of my step-mom on the Cheesecake Factory issue. It turns out we have a fridge and a mircowave in the hotel room so we can grab some stuff at the grocery store for the plane ride home. I am thinking that for the flight out I'm going to toss my usual oatmeal and SF hot chocolate mix into a tupperware bowl and then ask for hot water when I get on the plane...then I don't have to worry about eating the airplane food or McD's in the airport either. We're leaving my house on Friday at4:45 am...eeeeek.

Sue: I sent you a PM. We'll talk soon.

Angela...I hope that you are finding the strength and support you need to get through your very difficult time.

Leanne: CONGRATS..and may you have continued success with school and with everything else that comes your way.

Catherine: About 6 months after I moved to LA, I put a profile on JDate. I think I marked full-figured in my profile. I was too scared to out a picture on there. I kept meeting men who wanted Barbie dolls. I stuck it out for a while and finally met Jason, my current BF. Jason has never judged me for my looks or my body and has been my biggest cheerleader every step of the way. When I realized that we had something really serious developing, I took a long hard look back at the types of boys..and men I had dated and pursued over the years. Jason for the most part is their very antithesis. He makes me feel special and beautiful and was so worth the wait. There are wonderful, adorable, special men out there who understand that a woman's true worth lies in her heart and not in her dress size. Good Luck!!!

Well...having said that, I need to get cleaned up...we're having dinner with Jason's parents in an hour and I need to be presentable.

Hope you are all enjoying Spring. The weather here has been beyond bizarre...first it's hot, then the winds start howling, then at night it's cold, and so on. And just when I think it's finally settled down it starts up again. Meanwhile it's driving my nose crazy...I have a HUGE zit and I just found out that I have to take some photos tomorrow for the class I teach...aaarrrggghhh.

On the other hand it looks like my TOM issues have finally resolved themselves and I am back on my regular chemically regulated schedule. I thought I had started up again last night...but I guess not.

Ok..I'm done this time...I mean it.

SMOOCHES!!!