A fly by before taking off out the door to go to work and the tempting bake sale. I'm not taking ANY money, so I'll be ok. Whatever it takes, right.

Heather and Annie Your posts mean a lot to me and I hope to carry those thoughts with me all day.

Hope all of you have a good OP day. Don't forget to drink your water!!

Hi everyone! Wow, I've missed so many posts! I have been a little blah these days! It ALL catches up to me around the holidays. I had said I wouldn't let it this year.......but.......
My husband went back to work this week. After 5 months! (He had been very sick)!
The weather is cold and wet and dark all the time! I hate that!
So much in-law exposure this time of year too! Yikes! Maybe I shouldn't have said that!
I did WI yesterday with a 1# loss. I'll take it! :cool:

To those of you baking this time of year with so much restraint - kudo's to you! I CAN NOT even think about baking without thinking about eating the batter and the cookies, breads, fudge, candy, etc.........
dogpal - good job at the meeting!
Johnie - woooohooo on the 50# mark!
Battle - hi! I'm with the rest of the girls......don't under estimate yourself! I met my husband when I was 200 + pounds and he is in a very successful position in his job! Beauty is in the eye of the be-holder! Be patient! When you least expect it........it'll happen!
Cyn - good job on journaling what you eat! I really need to do that!
happy summer ZedUs! I'm jealous! Today is freezing rain and sleet here in Pennsylvania! My daughter has a two hour delay at school this morning because of it!
HI EVERYONE ELSE!:tree:
Well everyone, have a great OP day!

Battle – How nice to meet someone you might consider dating. I can’t remember the last time that has happened for me. But I know how you feel about the negativity that can come from feeling like someone wouldn’t be interested back. However, you really never know. He may not be the kind of guy who focuses on size.

Heather – Reclaiming our lives is definitely the most important part.

Annie – I loved your post! You are so right. We need to constantly celebrate our accomplishments and not let anything detract from that.

Sandy – Good plan to not take money to the bake sale!

Jeanne – The holidays can be such a rough time for so many people. We like to pretend that we are all supposed to be happy and merry when so many are stressed. Give yourself a break and do something nice for yourself.


OK, so I have been doing more thinking (and getting my mental butt kicked by Annie’s post :)). I need to stop all of those negative thoughts at the root immediately when they come up. So, I have decided that any time I start to have one of those thoughts I will say to myself, “True beauty lies not in form but in function.” What a body part looks like is so much less important than the fact that it works.

Even with a more difficult week (3 dinners out and 2 dance classes missed) I was still down another pound this week. I am so glad that I am more consistently losing again. Of course the next few weeks will be tough with Christmas coming up. So I am thinking that while it would be great to lose more, if I maintain here until the end of the year that would be great too.

Oh. My. God. This Tuesday ended a major 5 day skid/binge that started last Friday. I've not read anything yet...justed wanted to check in before I mentally wandered off too far. I'm over ticker weight and back into the 30's, though on my way back down again. Feeling back on track, but shocked that holiday/work/social stress got to me in the way it did, and that it took 5 days to right things after many months of things not being that way.

Hugs and love to all. Will catch up on all the posts I missed.

Metachick -- big :hug: first and foremost. It can be SO HARD to get back on plan after getting off. Forgive yourself and try to move on. Also, do you know what set you off? Sometimes figuring that out helps me avoid it in the future!

Himself went out this morning to shovel the sidewalks since I am obviously not going to be doing it this year. He is not "tool friendly" in any way at all. He was out about 30 minutes, and came in with a gaping hole in his new cords. I'm not sure how someone gets an L shaped tear on their butt from snow shoveling, but since he came in bloody last time, I guess a small tear is a good consolation. He's been talking his friends into coming over to help because I'm so laid up, and they have all fallen for it. I hope we run out of snow before he runs out of friends. When I first wake up in the morning, I think that I can just hop up and go outside and help, and after that first foot step I remember why I can't. If this was Florida, I could already be out walking in the neighborhood, but I can't do that here. It's just too dangerous. At least I'm getting caught up on my reading, and my textbooks for next semester should arrive any day now, so I'm trying to keep my mind active even if my body is vegging out.

Hi All

I am so far behind on personals I don't think I can catch up. The self-image comments by Annie, Heather, Nancy and Battle have certainly hit home. It's the wavering between that can create a dangerous situation for me. A few people from my office gave me a "Superhero" kit to celebrate my birthday - we had great fun with it - out came the camera - the superhero mask covered the face but not everything else. This may actually be my before picture even though I have lost 30 lbs. I think Nancy had previously mentioned black clothes and not seeing the difference - the pants I had on were much too long as well we much too wide - it certainly doesn't show. I'm pretty bummed out about the pic. On the bright side it was great fun being a superhero.

The time is finally here to head off for our cruise. The bags are mostly packed and the excitement level is off the charts.

I hope to be able to at least read posts a few times while we are gone. I am heading in to this in a good state of mind food wise as the scale continues to give up a bit each and every day. If I can come back with the scale about the same it will be a huge victory. One of my plans is to not use elevators but always take the stairs. Additionally I will walk the deck early every morning as I am an early riser and I will relish watching the sunrise while walking. One concern is drinking enough water - we'll see how that goes.

If I don't get back to post - see you on the 22nd. Keep up the great work.

Hugs,
Carol

To all of you who are tempted by baking, I used to envy anyone who could bake, but now I am thankful that I am really not too good at it. At least I don't have to be tempted by my own cooking. I can bake a few things, but I am also not really interested in doing so, so it doesn't bother me to simply stay away from the oven.

Carol - Have a WONDERFUL holiday!!!!!! I can't wait to 'hear' all about it when you get back. I've never been on a cruise, as I get seasick and worry that I may be stuck in my room all the time feeling awful. I would LOVE to try one though.

Jeanne - I am sure you are going to miss your hubby after having him home for so long. Is he well enough to go back full time, or is he doing it a little at a time?
I actually envy you guys your snow, but I'm not sure I envy you your sleet etc. I can't imagine having a day off because of the weather. Over here the kids are allowed to stay at home if we have had three consecutive days over 100F and are expecting another one, but that RARELY happens where I am and the parents send them to school anyway because we are mostly airconditioned and many of the kids are better off at school than at home.

Story - I think you would look GREAT walking out there in the snow and cold. It should make other people envious that you have that sort of commitment. I have a 'dicky' ticker as well. My dad passed that on to me. Since I was 11 and hormones kicked in I have regularly had ectopic heart beats, where it fits an extra beat in or something and I feel a 'flutter' in my chest. I also used to get regular palpitations, but (touch wood) those seem to be few and far between now. I actually seem to get more of both sorts around TOM, so I have a feeling that hormone affect it somehow, but I have NO idea how.

Catherine - It sometimes sounds as though you almost MISS being out on the sidewalk with a shovel. My hubby is from Calgary (beautiful area) and he says that the one thing he DOESN'T miss is shovelling the snow. I keep telling him that I would love to see a white Christmas and he laughs at me because I think it is freezing when it reaches 15C/58F. He doesn't think I would cope with the cold at all.
I truly hope that you are up and about more soon. Have you been able to give Himself some cooking lessons recently?

Metachick - I have been doing this for almost 4 years now and I have just recently been wondering why all of the treats around the place suddenly look more appealing when I have been able to pass them by for SO long. Please don't feel bad for your 'lapse', as it can happen to all of us and we just have to either try to get around it or we have to wade through it and come out the other end more determined. The past couple of days I seem to have waded through it, but I am determined now that I can get around them now and get back to my 'avoidance/ignorance' of all the extra goodies. Good luck with the next few days.

Nancy - It is wonderful that you are still down a pound even though you didn't think you did that well lately. You will probably find that you are actually eating better than you realise and are fitting in a lot more incidental exercise/movement than you used to do, which would all be helping. I know that I have had a few 'rest' days from exercise lately, as I haven't been feeling that well and I don't want to get REALLY sick for the holidays. But when I have thought about it, I have worked out that I have actually been moving around quite a bit just throughout the regular day, so I am certainly not as sedentary as I used to be.
I really like your new 'view' of your body. It sounds really positive! I may have to use that a little myself I think. I still have days when I feel 'fat' and it seems to mess with my head more than it should.

As for me...

I survived the day yesterday with very little voice. The kids were really good (when they weren't laughing at me for my squeaky voice) and behaved really well. I had someone come in and help out when I had to move all of the furniture out of my room in the afternoon, so that went better than I thought.
I got lots of lovely presents and cards from kids and parents. I would like to encourage any of you who have school-age kids to let their teachers know when they are doing a good job. We certainly don't do this job for the accolades, but it just makes us feel SO wonderful when someone takes the time to let us know that they appreciate us. I was SO happy to receive some of the notes, comments and hugs from parents. Here are a few notes I got in cards:

"Many thanks for your thoughtful and caring approach to S this year - it has not gone unnoticed and is very much appreciated. We feel S has made many advances in his school life in 2007 and this has been helped by you." (This was from parents who have had some 'difficult' years in the past.)

"Thank you for all of your hard work the last 2 years. E has gone from being shy, and a reluctant reader, to confident and a lover of poetry."

"Thank you for making P's school life so much happier and worthwhile than previous years. You have restored our faith in the school system."

I am sure you can imagine how special these were to me. I can't stop smiling when I think about them. I suppose I always try to do my best for the kids and their families, but you never REALLY know if it is good enough until you see things like this. Oh... and the good State test results helped too. LOL

I have to go in to school for a few hours this morning for staff winding up stuff, then we are off until the end of January. I am getting my hair coloured this afternoon (to cover up a LOT of grey) and then we are in to the city to watch the Chorus sing. Tomorrow I am hoping that my voice is good enough to sing in the city, otherwise I may just join them and 'mouth' the words, to get used to the performance side of things. It is supposed to be a wet day, so I hope we have cover wherever we go.

Catch you all soon.

Take care,

Zelma

Hi all,

OK....I suck. I tweaked my back a few weeks back, could barely do anything...but eat. So I did. And haven't really stopped. I am so disgusted with myself. Why why why? Argh.

Angie

:) Hi everyone. I hope you all had super days that were op and water filled. My day was pretty good. It started of great with a 8.5 pounds loss from last Thursday. Before we get too excited. It is TOM for me and I must have dropped a ton of water weight that I have been holding onto. But, I am thrilled because I have 5 more pounds to go before I hit a 200 pound lost for this year! I have 16 pounds to go and I will be out of the 3's FOREVER. Lots to look forward to in the next few weeks for me weight wise. If I don't hit those goals until after next year so be it, I am close. I have worked hard this year and I am just going to :carrot:about that fact.

Sandy: How did the bake sale go today? I hope you were able to resist but if not we still love you! :hug:

Jeanne: Congrats to you on -1. Keep up the great work. :hug:to you on feeling blah. Maybe you could get one of those sun light type things to cheer you up? I have been hearing lots about them and the wonders they seem to be for people who get seasonal affective disorder or depression.

Nancy: Woohoo to you on another -1 You are rockin girl. I am so happy for you.

Meta: You will get back into the swing of things. Here is a hand up........ okay now back on track you go. :hug:

Catherine: :drill: Don't you dare go out side to shovel snow or even attempt it right now! Okay, that said, :hug:sorry you are so board and your trusty sewing machine is messed up. Hang in there. When do you get to join the pool????

Storey: Hi

Carol: :bday2you: I hope it is/was a happy, happy birthday! Have a super time on the cruise!

Zelma: How precious those notes from parents are! :hug:

Angie: How's the back? Now, here is your hand back on track...... Okay, :hug: tomorrow is a brand new day!

Well all, I hope you are doing wonderfully well. Have a great weekend if I don't talk with you until later.

Where are you Debbie, Sharon, Patti, Xena, Brandnewme, anyone I didn't mention by name, come back to us soon.

Blessings all,
annie

Hi, just another quickie.
Zelma, I always send a card & small present at the end of the school year, with Gareth being Autistic he needs extra help & support. I just wish we could afford to buy ALL the staff presents as everyone, dinner ladies included are so caring at his school. I hope you get to rest your voice & the change from class teacher to IT & music specialist (am I right?, sorry if I'm not) is fun, surely it means LESS paperwork? lol xxxxxxxxx
Nancy, I too buy men's t shirts, I bought a lovely Betty Boop one, I knew it would be tight but WTF the sleeves barely covered my armpits, let alone my arms. I sent it to Ammi for her daughter who likes it, it was VERY short too. Why are manufacturers making short, tight, almost sleeveless t shirts for fat/larger women???? I want sleeves that cover most of my upper arms and ALL of my tummy!!!!! I am sure with all this dance, yoga & other exercises they will be shrinking fast!xxxxxxx
Battle, WTG on feeling more like a 'woman', you are really attractive & guess what??? There are a lot of men who like women with curves, busts & bottoms, not stick insects. I'm sure you will be pleasantly suprised!!! I met my hubby at this weight (I did gain quite a bit coz of pregnancies & depression related to having a disabled child but he still loved & fancied me) and though I felt fat there were guys 'checking me out'. You smile, that's the best thing anyone can wear, it suits all sizes!xxxxxxx
I have to take Gareth to school now, I have ANOTHER coldsore & I'm off for a few drinks tonight with my sister & friend, so I'll look great in my new sparkly jean & earrings with a big red BLOB on my lip! It's bad enough having a sore nose from keep blowing it! Not that I'm after guys or anything!!!! I'll just feel self conscious all night now!
I treated myself to an early present some Angel perfume so at least I'll smell nice, lol!!!
Take care everyone & stay wrm, or COOL in Zelma's case!!!
xxxxxxxsharon

I don't know anyone to leave personals, but I think posting here will keep me more accountable!

I received my new walking at home dvd (low impact is about all I can do at the moment). I FINALLY installed the fitday software that has been sitting on my desk for WEEKS. AND my bento box/laptop lunch is enroute to my humble abode (thought that would help me with portion sizes, and help keep me prepared when not at home near meal or snack time...plus waste free..huh, huh?).

Anyways, I recently joined 3FC with intentions of just lurking, but was blown away by the support soooo I'm posting, AGAIN...

I have been planning my course of action the past 3 days and although I have been more aware of what I am doing, since the majority of my "beginning tools" are here and ready, right now!!! i am starting...right now as a matter of fact! Going to do my video right now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wish me luck!

Right now!

Good Luck judojediworm! And......:welcome2:

Hi everyone! Have a great OP day! I'm off to the Candy Store! Yikes!!! It's been rough, but - we have been so busy - I haven't had much sneakin' time! :o

Sharon: HI. I have been missing you.

Judojedi: Welcome! So glad to have you here. Jump in and post anytime you want. Doing personals isn't something you have to do. If someone says something that strikes you and gets you to thinking and want to comment, go for it. we're just glad to meet you and see what's going on in your life.

Jeannie: Good morning.

Well, did my exercise and it is almost 6 so time to go shower and get ready for work.
Blessings all,
annie

Good Morning!!:coffee:

Sorry I have been MIA, but this time of year is so crazy for me!! :crazy: I have been reading all your posts, and even though I can't get back on the computer after work to post myself, I am keeping all of you in my thoughts every day.:grouphug:

As for me, eating has not been so great. I am fine at at breakfast and lunch(at work) but since all I do is run around when I get home, dinner has not been so good. We moved all the furniture in the living room to accomodate our tree~which at the moment I have pulled Jack out of 3 times today~ and I don't know which abyss the scale went into. I know...I am the queen of denial anyway...I could actually go on the scale in the Nurses office at school...but I can't bring myself to do it. And that is EXACTLY how I wound up 380lbs. I find myself reverting to old bad habits, and that makes me really dissapointed in myself. I am finding that the more people are noticing my loss so far, and it is really making me feel like I am so much further along than I really am. In my own twisted way, I think I am sabotaging myself. I am really planning after the holidays (no excuse, just reality!)to make a plan with all my WW materials to start over (again!). I have to get back in control. There, now I have put it out there and you all can beat me with a stick if I reneg on it!!!:club:

I am going tomorrow to see John Edward and I am very excited!! I am hoping he can have some of the relatives come through to me...I will wear my Grandmothers earings and I have a Kartosh(sp) my FIL got me from Egypt that I will wear, so maybe that can help. I am going with my neighbors next door, but I feel so bad for them because last week they told us the Dad has just been put into Hospice and will not be comming home. His body is riddled with cancer and he is very ill. Makes my psycho problems seem so trivial!!
Also, Sunday we will be having "Fake Christmas". Last Sat. my SIL call my husband and TOLD him that they would be comming over on Sunday to celebrate since they will be going to my Niece's in MD and we are not. Now mind you, I had only bought little gifts to mail down since we are staying home, so now I had to go out and buy everyone something better, and I almost freaked since she invited herself and I thought I would have to cook a Christmas Dinner with 1 weeks notice!! I made Doug call her back and she said not to bother with the turkey, she will bring ziti and sausage dishes. I am still not thrilled, but I ordered a 3ft hero (chicken cutlet w/mozzerella and roasted peppers) anyway. At least my kids will get something from them...although in the past, most had to be returned!!:rofl:

So that's my story for the past couple of weeks...oh and for all you Billy Joel lovers...I live in the lovely town of Hicksville, NY...which if you are a true fan, you know that it is where he grew up. I have seen him in concert numerous times, and when he was married to Christie Brinkly, I was a cashier at Genovese Drugs(like CVS) and they came in to shop. He is a doll, and she definately looks better with makeup on!!!!!!

Have a Great Weekend!!:cheer2:

Have a GREAT Cruise Carol!!!!

Good Morning Everyone

I also identified with the conversations involving self image. Just this week while being really happy about a 50 pound loss, I found myself thinking and making self-deprecating comments like "it's just a drop in the bucket for me" and thinking I'm still so large 50 pounds doesn't make that much difference. But after reading all your posts, I decided to just make it all positive and just celebrate the loss for the success it is :carrot:

I also find it difficult to do baking and not be constantly sampling myself. Therefore, this year I have really reduced the amount of baking and fudge making I am doing, since I in previous years I think I did it more for myself to eat than anyone else. Also, I'm not doing any Christmas goodie cooking until the weekend just before Christmas since I'm planning to take the few days around Christmas as "free" days. I did this at Thanksgiving without gaining any weight so I hope I can be as successful at Christmas and get right back OP the day after Christmas.

Meta & Angie - We all fall down from time to time, that's why your friends are here to help you up, understand and encourage you to not beat yourselves up, just get back up, dust yourselves off and move on & try again. Here's a :hug: for you both.

Donna - I can totally relate to ending up this way by being in denial and avoiding the scale. The times in my life that I have gained the most is when I did not step on the scale. I won't beat you with a stick but I will do what I can to encourage you to be positive and don't let those old habits creep back up on you. :hug:

Judo - Good Luck Right Now!!!

Carol - I am so envious of you going on a cruise. It's something I've always wanted to do & still hope to do sometime in the future. Have a great time!

Catherine - The image of himself shoveling snow was just too funny. I too hope you run out of snow before friends or he may not have any wearable clothes left. I hope you can be up and about soon, since it sounds like you are going stir crazy, especially since your sewing machine bit the dust.

Wishing everyone a great weekend.

Johnnie

More about self-image. I think I was most depressed about how I looked after losing 70 pounds. At my high weight I had given up caring. I was a blob, knew it, and focused on other things I was good at. But after I lost a lot of weight I still was obese and still couldn't shop in most stores... you wonder "Why DID I bother?" I'm glad I kept the positive thinking alive, though. Even at that weight I had reclaimed my life.

Still catching up on posts, but wanted to thank everyone for the support and good thoughts from the bottom of my heart. I needed that, and should have come sooner. Today is the third day back on track, and the first day where I'm starting to feel like me again, only 5 pounds heavier. Those pounds will go I know, but it's a little demoralizing to have them back if even for a week or two.

The first two days were tough, like driving and having to hold the wheel really hard to stay off the yellow line. Sometimes it's not just what you eat, but how you eat, and what you're feeling as you do. The physiological storm that follows a binge is tough too, and it gets hooks into your mental state as well.

Angie - You don't suck. It's all so damn unpleasant, which makes the fact that we've all done it over and over again so frustrating and inexplicable on the surface. It's so easy to be hard on ourselves, and see it as bevaviour that reflects some deep, ridiculous, unforgivable personal flaw. One of the biggest gifts of the intuitive eating stuff for me has been the understanding and acceptance that through binging and overeating I am actually trying to help myself, to sooth myself, to meet very real and very valid emotional and psychological needs in a way that took root at some earlier point of my life when I didn't have near the skills I needed to recognize any of it. At the core these are positive, if ultimately ineffective, expressions of self love and self care. I just need to learn new ways to sooth my emotions and fears, and slowly - and imperfectly - I am. I don't suck either. :)

Anxious to catch up on the self-image discussion you've all been having. It looks really interesting.

Only soaked in enough to manage one more personal for now...Carol, have a FANTASTIC cruise.

Story-My husband doesn’t even wear a coat in 30 degree weather, but I look like I’m making an assault on Everest. Who cares how you look as long as you are comfortable enough to get your walking in.

Carol-One of the 7 habits of highly successful weight loss maintainers is to start taking the stairs and parking farther away. They did a survey up here where they put signs up near elevators about which way the stairs are, and found a much larger percentage of people will take the stairs if they simply know where they are.

Zelma-I do miss the sidewalks. It might not seem normal, but I take pride in the little things like keeping house just because I can’t get the pride of doing a job out of the home. I’m not sure I’m ready to give him cooking lessons. I was raised where men folk had no business being in the kitchen. I’m also not the best teacher. I always learned things really fast, and seem to expect everyone else to pick things up just as fast, and that’s unreasonable. My mom was the same way, that’s why she didn’t attempt to teach me to sew. I learned by watching instead. I’m very good in a lecture situation, but trying to teach someone hands on, I’m just grueling.

Angie-Don’t feel bad. I’ve been down for 3 weeks, and I think I eat to cover the pain and boredom. Plus, I just don’t lose weight until I can exercise because my metabolism is just non-existent.

Annie-I can go to the pool as soon as I can walk a block to the bus stop. I’m pretty close. I also need to be able to bend good enough to shave the back of my legs good. I’m going to freak people out walking in there in my bathing suit, so I don’t want them to think I’m an escaped gorilla. My skin is very light and my skin hair is very dark, and very thick, so even if I’m willing to be seen in public in a bathing suit, I have my limits, and don’t even suggest that I let him do it. I’d be worried that he might enjoy it a tad too much, and I draw the line at that kind of weirdness.

Sharon-I wear Hanes Beefy-T’s, and the arms on those are plenty long. You can always buy long sleeved t-shirts, and hem them to the length you want. I knew someone in St. Pete who had had WLS, and had serious saggy skin, and she wore a body suit like a bike rider or runner might wear. She could work out without it flopping around. I read an article not too long ago that lack of physical support in other areas, and not just lack of a good sport’s bra, was one of the things that kept obese individuals from working out long term. I only really need to make sure my swim suit is tight across the shoulders at this point to keep my tummy flab from flopping in the pool too much, but hopefully, there will come a time when I will need more support, and I’m prepared to wear a dive skin under my exercise stuff if necessary.

Judo-don’t worry if you can’t keep up with personals. It takes time. Good job on getting all your ducks in a row. Planning will make just about any endeavor more successful.

Jeanne-I want to go to the candy store too. I am PMSing, and need some chocolate—BAD. At this point I’d eat a chocolate scented candle.

Donna-I did that “I don’t want to get on the scales because A) I don’t want to know, B) I’m sure it is the same as last time, or C) What I don’t know won’t hurt me,” for about 200 pounds. When they stuck me on the scale in the hospital, and I saw that the first number was a 5, I actually got into a shouting match with the nurse. We are only as sick as our secrets. Get on the scale. It won’t kill you.

Johnnie-I am still trying to figure out how he ripped his pants. I mean it would have made more sense if he had torn his parka. The tear was under his coat. I’m visualizing him trying to scratch his back with the ice chopper or something. He is of course clueless. I would have felt the breeze down my backside.

Heather-I spent half my life saying to myself that as soon as I lost weight, I’d do A or B. I was waiting to start my life, even as my life went on without me. I’m so glad that I quit waiting. I’m not where I want to be, or even where I thought I’d be, but by God, I’m not where I was either.

Meta-It is sure hard to get back on the horse. It seems like the longer you are off, the longer it takes until you get past the chewing fingernails point.

I’m starting to walk a few steps without the crutch, but taking it easy and one step at a time literally. I am counting the days until I can get in the pool. I know everything will be easier then, including the recovery. I’m still too scared to venture out onto the ice. I guess there’s no hurry.

Hi everyone,

Sure enough, I have a cold. I hope it's just a cold and not a full-blown flu. I'm afraid it is flu. Ugh. I want to crawl in bed and stay there for a long time. Luckily, or not so luckily depending on how one views lost needed income, my clients scheduled for tomorrow canceled, so I can sleep in.

I bought a chicken and necessary ingredients for chicken soup, and hope that will cure me quickly.

---
Catherine, I'm happy that you are making progress in your ability to walk. I'm sorry to read about your sewing machine. I don't know why it had to break now.

I've met a few other women from your area of the US, and they were all very traditional when it came to gender roles. I must admit the culture is way different in my world, and it's interesting to see how we all think about what's right and proper.

Meta, good for you for working back from the binge. It's hard to come back. I am always shocked at how quickly the body turns into the enemy when we have carefully cultivated its friendship. And every time I start to feel confident about the changes I've made, some challenge comes along to humble me again.

Carol, have a wonderful time on your cruise. You deserve it!

Annie, thank you for your words of support. You have a wonderful way and are a true healer.

Zelma, I love reading your updates and seeing your picture.

Hi and hugs to everyone else.

Battle-The culture about things is much different here. I have had to explain to him, several times, that he's not to just drop in with people when the house is a wreck. His definition of clean and mine are light years apart. On the positive side, he has never once complained about my housekeeping or cooking. I have learned to tolerate him vacuuming for me, but I still want to do it again after he has left the house. As to the kitchen, it is also a small galley kitchen, and the two of us in there together is just scary. I'm afraid we will get wedged together between the stove and dishwasher, and have to call fire rescue. Wouldn't that look great on the 11o'clock news? "Two behemoths caught in kitchen fetish mystery."

*note to self: don't read Catherine's posts before morning caffeine or while drinking morning tea!*

*wipes off monitor again from LOL so hard* :D

Hugs,
Ratkity

Well, I've decided to stop being silly, follow Battle's lead, and join a dating site. While it would be lovely to connect with someone, it's not something I'm dying for just now. Probably a great, stress free time to try the whole thing! This has required pictures (ahhh!). As I result, I've come out of my cozy Canadian closet and added one of them to my profile here too. :)

I'm 3 pounds over ticker weight today and I got in a workout earlier. I'm going to try to brave the cold now and go for a wee walk.

Hope all is well will all. :)

Hey, I met my husband on an online dating site too! There are lots of people who have on the boards here!

Donna: You can do it when you are ready. I know you can. I like Billy Joel a lot and I was laughing about Christie Brinkley. I think most of us look a bit better with make up. lol.

Johnnie: Great job staying positive. 50 pounds is a LOT of weight to be proud of loosing. Try to pick up a 50 pound sack of dog food and carry it around the store without a cart! You'll see and then be proud of yourself again. Hugs.

Heather: Good job with the positive thinking. I really think it helps us to get through the rough patches.

Meta: Hey, keep 2 hands on the wheel as long as you need to! I am so excited that you posted a photo. I will go try to find you after this. Maybe you can post one on your avatar soon. Good luck with the dating. Anyone that snags up you and Battle will be blessed!

Catherine: I can't wait for you to be able to go back to the pool I think you going to the pool will honestly help me to go more steadily. Stupid I know but, hey, that's just my feelings. I was cracking up about the "kitchen fetish". Also. don't worry. Your Dear hubby will learn in a few years not to bring in drop in guests without cheking the status of the "house" first. lol. I know that after 23 years of marriage, Joel sure knows the way to play that game. lol.

Battle: So sorry that you have a cold. I hope it isn't a full on flu bug. I have a bad cold too. I have been sneezing and coughing all day. I am going to take some Tylenol cold meds and hit the hay. It is after all almost 2 a.m. I have been very silly today with my body, not resting enough. I hope you have used your brain better than I have today. Hugs.

Well, I'm off to bed now. Hugs to you.

Blessings all,
annie

Happy Sunday all!

I went to a Xmas party last night. The food was incredibly rich and plentiful, as well as the spirits (I don't drink). There was an excellent bluegrass band and the house was festively decorated. This was the boss's boss's boss's party. Much fun was had by all. I ate an appropriate amount of the favorites, but the richness was a bit much for my tummy. Much fun was had by all!

Nancy, I hope you are feeling better about yourself more and more each day. I bounce up and down mentally and there is no rhyme or reason for the roller coaster. I've decided that it's an integral part of this journey and to expect those "emo" periods. The key is to hang in there!! It's a good thing feelings are not facts, and they will eventually change. Your dancing is so wonderful! Keep it up!

Battle and Meta, you both are inspirations. I am slowly becoming female and am not yet at the mental stage where I want to date. Battle, eat some chicken/matza soup!! I heard that cures all colds and flu. I'm guessing your sink catastrophy is over?

Annie, I think of you every time I zip my coat! I bought 2 coats from the London Fog outlet and they were snug in the hips a year ago. Today they are not! I want a small child size left in there one day too. I'll be sad when I can't wear them cuz they are too big, but will remember to be HAPPY for the bizillion other great things with those 2 coats becoming too big. Thanks for the pep talk. OMGosh, amazing how much TOM water weight hangs around. Eight pounds is an entire gallon of water! That's some major tinkling too hehe. At least you know your kidneys still work.

Sandy, I hope the bake sale went well and you made lots of money.

Jeanne, I'm sorry your hubby was so sick for so long. I know him going off to work makes things feel back to normal. Stay Warm!!

Catherine, Himself is an enigma (referring to the mystery hole in his pants). Despite that and his slow learning curve about house rules, he sounds like winner! One day, I'll get one of my own. Meanwhile, I love all your stories. So sorry your motor in your beloved sewing machine flopped. Wow that you can wind it yourself and put new brushes in!

Story, I get the same allergy and lightheadedness symptoms. I'm hoping yours have calmed down some. My mom and I have pvc's (not mitral valve stuff, though). Mine show up when my thyroid meds are off. Mom's show up when she drinks caffeine.

GGG, I hope you had a great bday!! I freak out when that camera comes out, but I have so very limited amounts of pictures of me. You'll regret it in this journey. I'm wishing that your cruise is going fabbo! I want to hear details when you get back.

Zelma, yay for Aussie summer! I know you are sad to leave your little kiddos, but it sounds like they are sad too! I loved all the little notes you got from them and parents. I hope your voice returns so you don't have to lip sync your chorus stuff.

Realist, as I told Nancy.. hang in there. Don't give up. Come back and post often and make yourself accountable!

Sharon, I love your new pictures. I have the flattest straightest hair and would love hair like yours. My nephew is autistic and is going to a new school this year (private). He has made honor roll 2 grading periods in a row!! I had to laugh at the visual of "stick insect" women because it's so true! I used to get coldsores a lot and started taking 500mg of lysine (over the counter vitamin/amino acid). It stops the little virus from replicating and I've dropped my coldsore outbreaks to just 1-2 a year. I don't know if you can get some of that in the UK, but it's been fabulous.

Judo, you are doing great!! Keep up the great work! Don't worry about personals. Just post here often and tell us how we are doing.

Donna, I'm the same way when it comes to the evening. It's so easy to revert to old habits! I'd be so excited about seeing John Edwards too!! Tell us how it went. The holidaze will be over soon.

Johnnie, my goal is to stay the same during these holidays. If I lose, I'd be happier (of course). I'd have to put more effort in not sampling stuff at Xmas parties to do that!!

Heather, I felt exactly the same way about my self-image. At my highest, I was a big blob and concentrated on things I was good at.

Meta, I am trying to learn about IE. Someone once said "Today, I refuse to hurt myself" when referring to a potential binge. I'm trying to incorporate self love stuff and the IE cues. I want to hear about your dating experiment! It's scary and thrilling at the same time.

Hugs and Luv to all! If I missed anyone, please know it wasn't intentional and I appreciate ALL of you lovely people.

Ratkity

Meta - You look lovely in your profile pic. Your blue eyes are very striking. I look at you and cannot imagine that you were ever at your start weight. Good luck on the dating site. I admire you brave ladies!

Not much to report here. I've mostly been lurking for a few days. My eating's been a bit out of control and am trying to reign it in.

Deb – It can be really tough to reign eating back in once it has escaped – especially this time of year.

Ratkity – That is fantastic that you were able to enjoy yourself at the party and eat the right amount. Thanks for the concern. I have been a lot better. It really is a weird thing. I have long known that part of the issue on the way up was that I always felt an equal level of fatness. I always felt huge. That feeling really didn’t change in flavor too much from about 200 – 300 pounds, which in itself is such a weird thing. I guess I am surprised that I am having a similar reaction on the way down, but I am not sure why I am so surprised. I guess part of it is that I felt like I had gotten completely past the point of getting down on myself because of how I look. It is a bit disappointing to know that I haven’t. It also tells me that my body image is still quite skewed. But at least here I know that I am not alone because so many people on this site from a whole range of weights have the same issue. Yes – the important thing is that we keep going and hang on despite the feelings.

Annie – I am so excited for you with how close you are to your 200 pounds lost goal! It is just so fantastic and inspirational!

Meta – You look beautiful in your picture! You have amazing blue eyes (and good choice of shirt color to set them off). That is great that you feel ready to take the plunge into online dating.

Catherine - :lol3: You have such an amazing way with words that brings whatever you are describing to life. The behemoths in the kitchen had me rolling.

Battle – I hope some rest and some nice chicken soup have helped with the cold. I also swear by those emergen-c packets, although I am not sure how much they really help and how much is in my head.

Heather – I think the thing about having given up caring at my highest weight is a big part of it. Also the reality of how I still feel so fat with how much I have lost. I think part of that is realizing just how much damage I have done to my body and it makes me sad. But you are definitely right – the important part is that we are reclaiming our lives.

Johnnie – I also relax things around the holidays. I have to make sure that I don’t go crazy and eat more than I need because I only allow myself the opportunity on those few days, but I also don’t want the stress of calorie counting when I am trying to relax and enjoy my time with my family.

Donna – The trip to John Edwards was finally here! It seemed like a long time ago when you got your tickets. I would love to hear how it went. I’m sorry to hear you have been struggling lately. It can be really hard when people notice your loss but you don’t feel like you are living up to what they are seeing in you. Don’t make me come over to LI to really beat you with that stick! :D

Judo – As others have said, definitely don’t worry about personals. I have a Mr. Bento lunchbox and I totally love it. It is great at keeping my portion sizes in line. Did you get Walk Away the Pounds? How did it go? Please join us on the exercise thread and track your minutes. It can be so motivating.

Sharon – I am absolutely dumbfounded at the tiny arm thing. Who the heck is designing these clothes? Definitely not someone who knows any larger women. Good for you to treat yourself to some lovely perfume. I got some recently that I keep forgetting to wear.

Angie – Sorry to hear you have been having back troubles and are struggling. Don’t be disgusted with yourself. You ask why you do this. My reasoning is that eating has been my best and only way to show myself comfort and love. By feeding myself I was trying to do a nice thing but it was the wrong thing and backfired. We need to find other ways to pamper ourselves in times of stress, but don’t be too hard on yourself that you have reverted to this form of comfort.

Zelma – Your students are so sweet! I hope you felt better enough to sing.

Carol – If you are reading this, have a great time on your cruise!!! Sunrises over the water sound divine. We will want some pictures!

Story – I am glad to hear you are feeling better. 30 degrees in SoCal? Ugh! I thought it was supposed to be warm there.


It isn’t warm here either. In fact it is a weird day of mixed snow and rain that looks downright nasty. Luckily my only task for the day is to stay home and clean. My parents are staying over on Christmas Even and Christmas Day and of course I want it to be sparkling when they are here.

I have an NSV that I have been forgetting to mention. I have to use safety pins to cinch in every one of my skirts so that they don’t sag halfway down my hips. Of course I am still wearing some of the clothes that I had at my highest weight (not all, and at my highest they were getting really tight) so it isn’t THAT surprising. I am waiting for the after Christmas sales to hopefully buy myself some new stuff.

I am (mostly) prepped for my audit which starts Monday. I was worried that I would have to work over the weekend, but I ended up getting almost everything done last week. After this week I am going to have some nice time off. I think I will have to go into work on Thursday the 27th to do payroll and check up on things, but other than that I will have off until the 2nd. I am not sure yet what I am going to do with the time, except that I hope to take some extra classes when I can.

Ratkitten: so glad that you had fun at the party. Great job eating only what your body needed/wanted. LOL on the tinkling thing. :) Congrats on the coats getting too big. I sometimes zip my coats up and just sigh at how far I have come. I can remember the frustration I had when I purchased my coats from Lane Bryant Catalog because no store had one big enough for me only to get it out of the box and it still is too small. It is such a nice feeling.

Deb: Hugs. It sure is difficult to get back on track. I remember it so well. I know you can do it Deb. Hang tough and take one day at a time.

Nancy: Yeah for your skirts getting too big. That is so great. I have 3 of them that are doing that on me right now. I do like the skirts and wish I had Catherine's know how to sew them a bit more tightly down the seams or something without messings them up. I think that in 16 more pounds when I get out of the 300's I will go through all my clothes on a Saturday again and put the ones that are just too large into a give away pile. Hopefully by that time some of the things that I have in my closet that other people have given me will be just right then.

Well, I finally had a smashing of the 2 scales party for myself today. I used a hammer and a pair of safety glasses and smashed those two scales that I had to use for the past 3 or 4 years. It felt so freeing to know that I will not hve to use 2 scales to weigh myself on ever again. My DH took some photos of me doing it so I will post them later this week. I hope you all have a wonderful op, water filled week. For those of you who are catching flu bugs and such, hugs and drink extra water.

Blessings to you all,
annie

I went ahead and posted the photos of my breaking the scales today.

Blessings,
Annie

Annie -- Breaking those 2 scales! Talk about a victory!! What a great way to celebrate! And get in a workout too! :)

I well remember ordering clothes online in the largest sizes made only to find them too small. That was one of the factors that led me to start down this road... Never again I say.

Annie, that is an awfully evil smile as you are raising the hammer!! I love it!

Luv,
Ratkitten

Just wanted to say thank you for those of you who asked where I was/how I was doing. Things have been all over the place for the last several months, but I think they are mostly settling down at this point. We are waiting on some test results for my dad that may or may not change everything, but at this point, I know there are absolutely no guarantees and I am trying to stay positive rather than stew over it. Whatever happens will happen, ready or not.

My weight loss is still where it was a couple months ago - going nowhere. Still trying to get my synthroid dosage right, and have had to up it again. I feel a lot better most days, but there are still some days where I am just downright exhausted and not functioning well. Plus the winter really hurts me, and some days it literally brings me to tears when I try to get up and around. I'm not entirely sure what I did (or didn't do for that matter), but I have had a lot of pain in my left shoulder and in my tailbone, in addition to the pain in my ankle & my hips. I worry that I may have the same nerve disorder that my dad has, but at this point, I fear it is more a paranoia issue than a real consideration.

I started work again the 26th of November. I love it. The pay isn't that great, but it's a job and it's something I feel I am meant to do. I have to start somewhere, so this is as good of a place as any. I had to miss three days last week due to not being able to get up and around.. guess I am going to have to start doing more preventative treatments and see where that gets me.

Anyhow, hate to sound like such a downer because I'm really not feeling that down in the dumps. Despite the issues, I am still managing to hold it together, and that's all I can ask right now. One step at a time.. as long as I can take that step I will be okay. Hope everyone is well, and I will try to stop in more often. Take care.

Saying Hello, Again
 

Hello all, been a while since I have been on here, A lot has been going on and has happened. I see a handfull of you still remain, Heather, NottheCheat,Brandnewme,Dogpal,Zelma,and Sharon(voodoo)It seems as it took me around 6 months to lose 80 lbs, and it took 16 months to put it back on. Man do I love to eat. I have such and obsession with it, rather it be dieting or not. I quit smoking after 20yrs 2 months ago. Why can I qiut something like that , but I can not control my food intake of consumption?.. I am not depressed , nor disappointed, I need to find out what makes me do this and work on that. Doing some soul searching right now and thought I would hang here while doing so.. It is good to see some old faces here,, Where is Ammi? and Hello to the new ones... ( new to me...)

Hi everyone! Have a great day and get that Christmas shopping done this week!:D

Catherine - :rofl: You're so funny! I always say I could eat a styrofoam ball if it was dipped in chocolate!

WELCOME BACK CROCK!!!!!!:hug:xxxxxxx I missed you! Ammi peeks in but has had some health probs though I'm sure she'll be back posting soon.xxxxxx
I'm having some confidence issues again,:( I don't want to leave the house but I have to take Aiden to nursery the rest of this week. It is his last week at nursery, he starts 'big' school (infants 4-7yrs) after Christmas. I'm eating for no reason other than I can, :?:I keep telling myself 'why bother Christmas is nearly here' not a good train of thought. I have to go & get ready to take him but hugs to everyone.
Brandnewme :carrot:CONGRATS:carrot: on the job.xxxxx
Annie WTG on the :devil:scales,:D lol, was it great fun?xxxxxxx
xxxxxxxsharon:hug: