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Old 07-09-2007, 08:06 AM   #1  
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Default 300+ And Ready To Try Again #1114

We are a group of individuals who weigh or have weighed 300+, or near there. This group was formed to provide a place for others like us to find support and hope. We are aware of the distinct problems that come with weighing over 300 lbs.

We want to invite everyone (roosters as well as chicks!) to join us in our journey. We share laughter and tears, heartaches and fears ... joys and celebrations. We also share what works for us and what doesn't.

We know the thread can move very quickly, and that people often make "personal" remarks and keep a number of conversations going. Please feel free to contribute even if you can't make personal comments all the time.

Finally, we also have several extra threads going on simutaneously such as Monthly Challenges, Weekly Weigh-ins, Recipes, Bios, Photos, Exercise, Info for Getting Started and more. Many of these threads are stickied at the top of the page. Please feel free to check them all out.

We have found this thread to be more than just a support group... we have found it to become a home. We invite you to join us.

I know you'll all agree that we are really thankful for the free services here at 3FC. The sisters offer all of this support and information with no charges to us. There are a couple of ways though that we can help out.

If you are thinking about buying anything at Amazon, why not help out 3FC at the same time? You can do this by clicking on the button for the Amazon "store" in the upper right hand corner of the screen on the PURPLE tool bar. A portion of your purchase price will be given to 3FC by Amazon. It doesn't increase your price at all, but it does help out 3FC. You can use any of the links that you see on the site in order to help contribute to the site.

Also, BTW, in case you didn't know it, you can view the message boards "ad free" for a minimal charge. I think it's $15 for 6 months. A very small investment to be rid of the annoying ads and make your pages load quicker.

There have been some concerns expressed by the powers that be about copyright infringement. So please, if you are directly quoting someone else or printing an article in whole or in part, please give credit where credit is due!!!
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Old 07-09-2007, 08:40 AM   #2  
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Okay... well I am reposting this here in the new thread as otherwise no one will see it.

Good morning, everyone.

Well here it is Monday again. How did my five days off go so fast? Not only that but I need to work overtime this week so am up at 4:00 AM yeeks. But I'd rather work it in the mornings than afternoon so will start at 6, which is the earliest I am allowed.

Glad to see so many good reports here! Great job everyone!

I worked at the festival again almost all day yesterday. In the afternoon I worked with a couple of other people pulling around one of the big "water wagons" with a huge cooler full of ice and water giving it away to people. That is such a hit on a hot day!

Catherine this time I did tell my friends at first that I got my finger injury in a bar fight. And told them that I was told in my forum that I should say that. One lady said to tell you that that is okay as they are very forgiving. We did get a nice picture when we "borrowed" the huge street sign for a few minutes that had arrows and said "official beer and wine garden" - and stuck it in front of our church booth with the arrows pointing to us, put a couple guys in front of it and took pictures. Ahhh got to have some fun along with all the work.

Oops time to get ready for work. Have a great week, everyone.

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Old 07-09-2007, 10:13 AM   #3  
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G'morning all!

Geesh Mistisue, my 5 days went fast too! Of course, my back is feeling better now that my little vacation is over.. doh. I did ride into work on the bike. I was just telling my sister that I need to find a mindless bicycle route to get into a riding routine. Sounds like you had a great time doing the festival again! Yay!

I'm drinking my water.. have 20oz in so far. I always shoot for at least 60. I'm one of those people that get immediately dizzy when slightly dehydrated, but it's an effort to get consistent fluids inside of me.

TOM is here (not sure if you use that acronym.. Aunt Flow for others). A switch flipped and I decided not to bounce up and down on DDR for a couple of days. I'll still do treadmill later on today.

Hugs and OP vibes to all you wonderful ladies!!!!

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Old 07-09-2007, 01:33 PM   #4  
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Litchick - Hope you have a fantastic first day at work!

Xena - a huge congrats on your acceptance to the MBA program! I'm waiting for just such a letter from the undergrad program I applied to so I can totally relate. Hope you can really relax now and enjoy the weeks between now and when you actually have to do the work!

Brenda - Way to go on reaching -125. You ARE going to lose 200, aren't you?

Sue - hope you got the A/C thing worked out. It is one of my major pet peeves in life when people leave other people hanging and out in the cold like that. It's really crappy when you know or ought to know that your actions will potentially leave someone else feeling lousy and you do it anyway. Very bad karma for Mr. Craigslist.

Nancy - Glad to hear you enjoyed the BBQ. I can totally relate to resenting those kinds of calories when we're on a roll, but I actually think it's really great that you indulged in the ribs and the Mike's. The host got to feel great about you enjoying his specialty and you were able to relax and have a couple of drinks with friends. Food is about that kind of stuff too, and naturally thin people do it everyday. Way to go on copying some skinny chick!

I spent some more time at the Y yesterday, and for the first time combined my fledging workout with a swim afterward. The pool felt really great. I also bought myself a really neat present for 20 bucks a month...I upgraded my Y membership to the 'Enhanced' version, which gives me access to an adult only changeroom with goodies.

I can now hot tub and/or steam room after my exercise, and there is a relaxing lounge/reading area as well. Things like shampoo, conditioner, body wash, shaving stuff, body lotion, deodorant, hair spray, gel and girl products are provided. There are even curling irons and an ironing board. Oh, and a towel service as well! I love the idea of just being able to show up with minimal baggage, and then pamper myself a little afterward. It changes the whole experience a little in a really nice way. My son calls this new changeroom 'the club' and pretends to resent that he has to make do with free bodywash and the sauna at the pool level.

I have to carry my membership card around now in the building because I have to swipe it to get in the new changeroom. I bought a lanyard at Value Village and attached my card to that so I can wear it around my neck. I looked at it several times last night, and realized that it symbolized a lot for me. Just a couple of weeks ago I was poised to let my Y membership go for the summer because we just used the pool and we live in a city that literally has over 300 lakes within it's boundaries. Now I have taken steps that confirm that I can belong to something completely and am capable and deserving of participating fully.

Last edited by MetaChick; 07-09-2007 at 01:39 PM.
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Old 07-09-2007, 06:09 PM   #5  
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Annie-I hope you are taking lots of pictures. That is something I really regret not doing.

Sue-No one said that Christians couldnít have naughty senses of humor.

Ratkity-Iím glad your back is feeling better. There is nothing worse than back pain, and thatís coming from someone who has had angina, a torn knee ACL, and gall stones.

Meta-Man do you ever have a cool Y.

I just about walked my little (well, littler than they used to be) legs off. I try to walk to the point where my feet are just getting tender, not to the point of pain, and that seems to work okay. As soon as I rest them, the pain subsides, and Iím good to go again tomorrow. Still OP. I allowed myself a few more calories yesterday because I just felt like my body needed it. Thatís a change.
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Old 07-09-2007, 06:34 PM   #6  
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Evening everyone! I hope this is the beginning of a good OP for you all. I didn't get any walking (strictly exercise walking that is...still got about 8000-9000 steps in each day) last week.

I do feel MUCH better than last week which I am REALLY thankful for. I hate when I feel BLECH! Its so hard to get up and get motivated.

The heat and humidity gets to me, so I am doing DDR for exercise. Man, you can work up a sweat doing that! Whew! I do it in training mode and am still on the first level, but its addictive and I do get a good amount of time in motion and that can't be bad for ya! I did lose 3 lbs this week. I did stray a bit from plan on Saturday and ate some things that would not be good for me if I ate them everyday, but since I can't remember the last time I ate a hot dog or a soft pretzel...its all good. I was right back OP on Sunday. In the past, it could be weeks or more before I could get back OP..if ever. It is a bit empowering!

Oh well...thats it from here for today. I will check back in tommorrow.
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Old 07-09-2007, 06:46 PM   #7  
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Hi All,

Just checking in to say hi. I had a very naughty weekend brought on by gaining 3 lbs that were definitely undeserved. I know I shouldn't have let it get to me. But it was TOM, I was moody, and I think I was just looking for an excuse to have a weekend of glutony So now I have probably gained another 3 lbs lol. But I'm back to being good and hope to see a loss next time I weigh.

I'm sorry I don't have the time to post as much these days but I do read your messages and keep up with your news.

Take care all and bye for now,


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Old 07-09-2007, 07:24 PM   #8  
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Now I have taken steps that confirm that I can belong to something completely and am capable and deserving of participating fully.
Metachick -- That's how I felt when we joined our new gym last year - I couldn't believe *I* belonged to a fancy pants gym with hot tubs and saunas, and a spa... but I do! And I use a lot of it! (Not as much as I'd like... but every week I'm there). ENJOY the new you!!!!
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Old 07-09-2007, 08:41 PM   #9  
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Hi Ladies,
Well, I fell off of the wagon again but hiked my bootie back up there and am totally OP today. It's been really hard with my son and dil living with us again but I came to the conclusion yesterday, that I am the one that has to do this for me.
Just getting back to OP puts me in a positive mood and a "can do" kind of mind frame.
Hope all is well with everyone and hope to get back on here later for personels.
O, I did gain 1lb this week but hopefully will have a good weight loss next week.
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Old 07-09-2007, 09:05 PM   #10  
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This is vent. Sorry it is negative.

Hi everyone. Not sure how I am feeling tonight. A bit down and a bit ashamed of myself, I think. Several months ago, the 25 year old son of a very good friend of mine (I'll call her Y and him K), and a good friend of mine in his own right, let me know he was getting married in Boston this October and that I was going to be invited. Now he, his sister, and his mother and step father all live away from me and haven't seen me since gaining weight. My immediate thought was "Oh my God, I can't be seen like this." No worries, though, I had plenty of time to get some weight off. Well, here it is, a mere 3 months away and I really haven't lost much since then. I am still MUCH heavier than when they saw me last. And to be honest I have started to think, "Well, I will just not go to the wedding. It will be busy at work or I will be busy with school and I just won't have time to go." The real reason I didn't want to go is that I am fat and ashamed of how I look.

Well, today I got an email from K asking me how certain I was that I was going to be able to come because he and his partner had something they wanted to ask me if I was coming. So I told him I was going to try my best to come (feeling guilty knowing that I was already plotting excuses NOT to come). He responded again telling me that in the Jewish wedding there is a document that is signed (can't remember the Hebrew name of it) that he and his partner will sign and that they choose 2 witnesses to sign as well. He said he and his partner would be "honored if you would participate in our ceremony this way because you have been my family's best friend throughout the years and we have gone through so much together." He told me it was going to be wonderful to get to see me again after so long. (It's probably been 4 years...didn't see him much while he was away for college).

I was so completely touched by him not only asking me to play a part their ceremony but also by what he said about what I meant to his family. Well, I was moved to tears to be quite honest. And that is when I felt ashamed. I am ashamed that I was trying to think of excuses not to go at the same time K was getting ready to ask me to be a part of the most important day of his life, not just by being there, but by participating in the ceremony. I am ashamed of how I look. And I am ashamed of the fact that even though he said all these kind things to me and asked me to be a part that deep inside I am still saying "No!!!!!!!! I can't let you all see me like this."

I told him I would be honored to participate and I will force myself to go now no matter what. I just wish I could do it with the joy that I should have at such a happy occasion, not only his marriage, but of getting together with old friends that I have avoided for so long. Friends that I love dearly. Friends that went through hard times with me and I with them. But I do not feel like I can be joyful. I am too consumed with guilt and shame over my physical appearance. Will they even want me in their wedding when they see me? Will their be photographs of the ceremony? I will ruin their wedding pictures.

Being this weight robs me of so much. Or rather, I let it rob me. I hide away, missing opportunities, or not enjoying them as much as I should because of my weight. It makes me so sad.

I have to confess I got a bit lonely over my long holiday weekend and I overeat for 2 days because of it. Later I realized there was no real reason for me to have felt lonely over the long weekend. I had been invited to Y's house in Houston to spend the weekend relaxing, catching up, and hanging out by the pool together. She is a stay at home mom with a younger son now and I know she would have enjoyed my company. But I declined the invitation. Not because I had other plans, but because of my weight. I did not want to be seen. And then I had the nerve to feel sorry for myself being lonely over the weekend.

When will enough be enough?
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Old 07-09-2007, 09:06 PM   #11  
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Wow I haven't had a chance to post in forever! So many crazy things have been going on I am not sure where to even start. The last few months have just seemed to have bad news back to back. Trying to just move forward if I can. I am not sure if some of you remember but my mom did come for a visit mid June. I was really nervous because she is really rude about my weight at times. But this time she was really really great! That was huge relief to say the least...especially since so many things have been going wrong lately.

I will admit I have not been doing that great with working out or watching what I eat. I am emotionally attached to food. It's so easy to grab the chips and drown out the stress. So the last few days I have been trying to get a grip. I have yet to get a new scale. I will get one in the next few weeks when we can afford one. I wanted to get one that at least goes to 400. I am pretty sure I haven't regained weight because some of my clothes are still pretty loose.

Enough about me...

Welcome to all the new people! Great to see so many new people around here.

And congrats to all of the losers! You all have been going wonderful. Brenda and Annie just to name a few you girls have been doing great with the losses!

Last edited by mechell81; 07-09-2007 at 09:15 PM.
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Old 07-09-2007, 09:13 PM   #12  
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XENA I am sorry you are having such a hard time right now. I know exactly how you feel about the weight keeping us from enjoying things. I have been doing that for years and years now. I am dealing with that myself especially lately. I just wanted to say hang in there hun.
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Old 07-09-2007, 10:33 PM   #13  
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Please keep in mind that your friends love you, not the number on the scale. Yes, they may be surprised, but they obviously care deeply for you and that feeling isn't going to change with a weight gain.

I understand this fear all too well. I go through it every year before I drive home, disappointed that I am still overweight. I've lived in my current state for 5 years now and I seclude myself from others to the point where I've not really made any friends to hang with. This fear, this seclusion, and the associated "fat anxiety" is so unhealthy. I'm lonely because I don't know anyone, yet I hide and don't make friends, thus continuing this silly cycle.

Don't do what I am doing...please go to the wedding. Try your best to lose a few pounds before you go, if that will make you feel a little more self-assured, but remember your self-worth is not the number on the scale. These are your friends and they love and respect you. We need to feel the same for ourselves, as others feel for us.
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Old 07-09-2007, 10:59 PM   #14  
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Oh, Xena, I'm so sorry, and I do know how you feel of course.

If you've been a family friend for years, your value comes from your friendship. Not the size of any part of your body.

Please, please know that your weight is not a moral issue. You're not a bad person because you're large. None of us are. And plenty of skinny people aren't good friends who get invited to be witnesses at weddings.

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Old 07-09-2007, 11:33 PM   #15  
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Peggy-we got up to 57 degrees here today and it rained so I guess that means the humidity was up. So sweating was not my problem, shivering was. One of the 7 habits of successful maintainers is to not deny yourself. I sometimes forget that because I also have a hard time hopping back on the horse, but when I can have something, and then get right back OP is heady. Congratulations.

Ammi-damn hormones can give us fits. Thereís nothing wrong with taking time off to enjoy the summer while you can.

Debbie-Whenever my husband says he is afraid that he has sabotaged me since we got married, I have to be very firm with him that only I can really sabotage myself. I always tell him that losing weight is a solitary and selfish thing that I have to do for myself, by myself, because if Iím trying to do it for any other reason, I will fail. That mind frame of ďcan doĒ is so crucial to success.

Xena-I have missed so many things in my life just because I felt like I was too fat to look good in my clothes, or that I simply didnít have anything nice I could wear. I was a no show at Christmas concerts, turned down being maid of honor at my best friends wedding, and avoided going to my Grandmotherís funeral among so many others. What I have found works is to be honest. Send an email to this young man and tell him you feel bad that you were actually thinking of skipping his wedding because of embarrassment at how you look. Tell him how large you are, or better yet send him a current picture. That way you donít have to see that ďshockedĒ look on peopleís face, perceived or real, and you can pass those first few awkward moments with your pride intact. You will find out two things Ė he loves you no matter what you look like, and still wants you to be part of his special day, and secondly that you wonít be the only one there who has gained weight. The things I have missed in my life, because of my weight, or put off until I was skinny enough, also make me sad, but have taught me to grab every moment of the life I have left. Itís time for all of us to take a chance and reach for the brass ring.

Mechell-We missed you. I remember reading once that one of the biggest hurdles that people who have wls face is that they no longer have an emotional outlet. They physically canít overeat. We still can, and occasionally I think we almost need to, just like sometimes we just need to blow off steam. The trick is to not fall into a hole where that is all we do. I did that for a very long time.

Last edited by CatherineM; 07-09-2007 at 11:42 PM.
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