Hi everyone!!! I've spent some time here before but for personal reasons I've decided to start over with a new user name and a whole new account. I'll head over to the intro thread when I have time.

Anyway, I've had a really rough year. . . my life has completely changed and I'm hoping I can get moved and settled within the next few months. I explain a bit in my new blog here: http://3fatchicks.com/diet-blogs/ewing/ . . . maybe you'll recognize my old before/after pic.

Back in 2004 I was somewhere over 350. . . I weighed myself a few weeks back and the scale said 287. . . and hey, just the other day it said 280. Anyway, where I'm at now is very close to when I was last here. . .I'm not sure exactly how long ago now but my last weigh-in was at 285. Thank goodness I haven't gained! I think the recent 7 pound loss has a lot to do with the fact that I just started working again, which is "freight" at one of the local stores. It entails a full day of walking, bending, climbing steps, and lifting boxes every time I head in. I feel like I'm going to die at the end of the shift (sometimes close to 11 hours) but I think I'm starting to get used to it. Er. . . who needs an exercise plan? o.O

I'm so worn out. . . I think one of my major issues now is gonna be food once again, but for different reasons than before. No more arguments about it now that the ex is out of the picture, but now that I'm on my own I have a really tight budget and very little energy to prepare anything.

I've met someone who loves me the way I am right now and I'm so thankful for that. . . at the same time he's being very supportive in knowing that I want to lose weight and be healthier. Unfortunately, it's currently a long-distance thing so I get a bit lonely.

Anyway, I'm gonna do my best to stop by when I can. Hope everyone is doing great.

WELCOME BACK! Congrats on keeping the weight off. I hope you can continue to find support here!

I remember you too, love your hair colour. I remember those lovely Sailor moon (??) pics & anime (??not sure about their specific names though, could be TOTALLY wrong) you posted a while ago. WELCOME BACK!!xxxxx
xxsharon

Welcome Back!!!!!!

I remember you too – welcome back! That is so fantastic that you have found happiness with someone new and that things are going so much better for you now.

Thanks everyone!

Sigh. . . I see I'm really gonna have to force myself to do updates here. . . I can't believe how depressed and. . . er. . . hungry I've been lately. I'm doing a bit of an update in my journal too, and yeesh. . . I binged yesterday. Nothing too horrible actually, but that's seriously so not like me anymore. Sigh. . . I've been so depressed. I'm not using that as an excuse, but more of a warning that I need to be more cautious about my actions in the future.

Hmm. . . as for the new boyfriend, I think I'll call him "Mr. Hawk" while I'm here, LOL! Oh, and BTW, most people call me "E" these days for short.

The long-distance thing has been very hard. . . the plan is that I'm going to move out there with him as soon as humanly possible, but unfortunately he's got to get his living situation figured out first and I've got some things to take care of myself. He's all the way out in Vegas and I'm still here in Wisconsin, so it's a good 2000 miles and downright impossible to sneak off for a casual visit. We've actually known each other over a year and he'd been my best friend throughout most of that time. . . sigh. . . and I was so depressed over the situation I had found myself in with the ex before he and I both decided to break it off. Well, one thing kind of lead to another with Mr. Hawk, and even though neither of us were looking for a relationship, before we realized what was happening we were an item.

He flew me out to meet him last month and I had the time of my life. I spent several days with him before we took off to meet other friends we knew from the internet for some fun out in California. . . then he and I spent my last day out there back in Vegas again for some alone time, and when it was time to go. . . I cried. . . I've never had anyone treat me so wonderfully and I so didn't want to leave him. Curse all the responsibilities I have back home, curse them!!! *shakes fist*

And if we thought we were miserable without each other before. . . well, now we both know exactly what we're missing. But I'm doing my best to be patient, and in the meantime I'm trying to assert my new-found independence and clean up all the messes the ex left in my life.

I'm afraid I've had a hard time making myself draw lately, but I keep telling myself that once I'm settled I should be able to get back into it again. In the meantime I've been working on my digital coloring and the like, and I think I've made a lot of improvement in the past few months.

Back when I was posting here before, I was somewhat paranoid that my online friends would "find me out" when it came to my weight issues, that they'd discover that I wasn't the "hot chick" I inadvertently made myself out to be. See, I'm a bit of a cartoonist and have a set of my own girly characters. . . one of them represents me, but she gets to have the type of figure I've only been able to dream about having. I can't say that matters to me anymore (thus the name change), but I still want to enjoy a certain amount of privacy and don't see a need for some of them to stumble across this place while searching for my artwork, LOL. Anyway, I wanted to be tied to my regular online name but have it be a little different, you know? But it's been kind of an odd thing. . . of course my real friends are completely understanding about the whole thing. . . um. . . I guess I haven't had enough real friends in my life, you know?

Well, I should go for now. . . my sleeping schedule's all out of whack and I'm gonna attempt to get some rest. Take care everyone.

~E

P.S. Oh wait, maybe I'll post in the pictures thread before I completely head off!