do you guys ever feel like you're sabotaging yourselves? i'll have a couple of days where my eating and exercise are phenomenal then, out of nowhere, with no real trigger, something will pop in my head that says "eat that, now eat that, that, and that" until i've eaten a lot of something i shouldn't have which in turn leaves me borderline depressed and in no state of mind to ever want to work out again. im at that point and wondering, am I the only one? am afraid to be fit? i remember the feeling i had after losing my first 20 and if felt great, i loved it! but the zest has faded and i dont know how to get back into that groove again. i wish i was home already. back in LA, back with my family, back in warm weather where i can hike, and be outside, and go to the beach, and run with my dog. working out in my room just isn't cutting it and being alone so often with nothing to do after work is like signing a weight loss death sentence.
i just dont know why these days ever happen. im hoping i can pull myself back together to start fresh tomorrow, i think i can, but who really knows. i wont weight myself in the morning, thats just asking for trouble but i will try to figure out why, on some days, i eat way more than i know i should. it feels kind of like when someone tells you you cant do or have something all you want to do is that thing and have it, understand?
i so want the feeling of losing weight and feeling confident back. i was at a great place in my life, finally felt like myself. i just dont know how to get back there. guh...done whining, must sleep...
I definitely have the thoughts, but I've learned to dig in my heels and tell myself no. Inside I'm pouting and tantruming like a child who didn't get their way, but as soon as the need to eat whatever it was that was calling to me passes it morphs into a feeling of being super in control like I won and I love that feeling.
It sounds a bit like you've got an all or nothing thing going on (I've had it before too). You're either perfect or everything's shot to **** and you don't want to do it anymore. I've had to learn to live in the middle. No more black and white thinking for me - I'm learning to live in shades of gray. I'm not going to get it all right every day. I may not exercise every day. I may do something like gorge on sushi like I did tonight. But every second is a chance to start over and clean the slate. Learn to forgive yourself for the slips and get right back on plan. You'll get more right than you will slip up and that will eventually get you where you going!
For me self sabotoge is usually connected to something else. For example, I am more likely to self sabotage the closer I come to my goal(I have 27lbs to go!!!) because now that I'm getting thinner I am getting attention from people(especially guys) that I never had before, because back then I just wanted to blend in. Now however, I am getting that attention and it's scary because I am shy and don't like being in the spot light. But I'm working on it.
Maybe instead of eating during those times, go for a walk or another room and just think about what is in your heart and mind, what are you feeling?
I've gotten as close to 4 pounds from goal and then I get lazy (of all times to get lazy!!) and I start eating more and not tracking what I'm eating. As a result I'm bouncing between 164 and 169 (my goal is 160). I don't know what's wrong with me! I keep looking in the mirror and thinking I look good and my next thought is "I want french fries!".
It's like I'm subconsciously keeping myself from goal. It wasn't this hard in the beginning even!
I should be able to get rid of these 4, 5, 6, 7 pounds in no time! ...but, I'm making it much harder on myself than it has to be.
It's like I'm tired or something. *sigh* I need a kick in the butt!
you guys are awesome. thank you so much for your input. i really appreciate it. im going to take all of your advice to heart and try to do better last time. life is NOT all or nothing.
I find myself doing the same thing. I finally realized that I kept finding myself in the kitchen RIGHT AFTER I looked at my calorie count for the day and thought "good job!". Why do I do that?
C.C. ~ I love your comparison to a toddler! I am VERY good at saying no to toddlers, but myself I am working on. I think that's a great idea of a way to re-direct your thoughts. Instead of thinking about how great the ____ is, think about the craving as a toddler tantrum.
Jenn ~ I think you are right - it's when we get closest to success that we feel like we need to erase it. I've done the same thing many times. Maybe it's the "nice girl" mentality we are brought up with. We are supposed to be in praise of others, but holding the spotlight ourselves is "selfish." I can't speak for anyone but myself on that, but it rings true for me. I have found over the past few years that my weight has been my "balancer." As I succeeded in school and in my career while balancing the Super Mom title, I ate. It has somehow been okay to succeed in those areas as long as I am still fat. Then, I don't have the whole spotlight. Darn it, maybe I am just that amazing and I can have a career, a family and be healthy too!
Calisa ~ You can do this! Realizing that it was self-sabotage and making a plan for next time is the way to get there.
Ya, it's weird. When people tell me I look like I've lost weight, I either get embarrased at having been overweight or wonder how bad I looked before, that me now looks good enough to notice. And sometimes I think I've sabotaged myself just because then I'll have an excuse for the scale not going down. If I've done all the right things and I'm not losing, it would really suck. If I eat too much then at least I have a reason. That makes no sense once I write it, but I think I've actually done that!
Self Sabotage?
