3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community

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-   30-Somethings (https://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/30-somethings-57/)
-   -   Single Thirty somethings!!!! (https://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/30-somethings/129711-single-thirty-somethings.html)

Ufi 07-31-2008 09:42 PM

One of the problems I find with being single and living alone is when I get home after a really bad day and there's no one to talk to, no one to share with. Or even to share good news. Most of my friends are wrapped up in their own lives and families. I just feel so full of DAY. Home alone in the evenings is my most dangerous time for eating.

Anyone else feel that way? How do you cope with it?

ViolinJenn 08-03-2008 02:41 PM

Hi Ufi and Welcome!:welcome3::welcome2:

I completely know where you're at! I have the same issue. I feel that my friends, the small group I do have, are either married or in relationships and so into their own world they rarely look outside. How do I deal with it, you may think that I'm completely nuts, but I come home after work and working out and share my day with my dog! If you don't have any pets, what about starting a blog? Also, what helps me is to remind myself that as a single girl, I have what all those women that are married and in relationships DON'T have. I have FREEDOM! The ability to come and go as I please as spend my $$ as I please! To me until the guy comes along that will love me for me as I am, I'll cherish my freedom!

And you always have us here at 3FC!:hug:

Ufi 08-03-2008 11:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ViolinJenn (Post 2299468)
And you always have us here at 3FC!:hug:

That IS helping, thanks! :goodvibes

darling clementine 08-06-2008 11:59 PM

Finally, a thread I can REALLY relate to :)

I'm 31, never married (though plenty of dysfunctional relationships in my past...) and am currently single/not dating anyone special. AND am from NJ, too!

I feel like I'm in transition -- I recently made the commitment to getting healthy and fit, and almost feel like I should just concentrate on THAT and not worry about dating/etc right now. A little confusing, if I do say so :?:

Anyway, I just joined this forum today and haven't really decided what weight loss route I'm going to go with...am thinking South Beach Diet. My mom has been doing that for over a year and lost about 30 lbs -- she's 58 and her main form of exercise is going for power walks every morning.

I look forward to hanging out and chatting with you all :sunny:

dla 08-09-2008 05:30 PM

Ladies...

A forum I can relate to. I just joined the forum a week or so ago and am doing MRC. It's my 9th day on it.

I wish I could say that I think it is going to be easier to do this plan being single, but I am going to need someone to kick me in the pants every now and then. Do you know what I mean?

I hope you meet you all soon!

jenjen 08-11-2008 11:09 PM

Hey Ladies. Sorry I've been MIA for so long. Work has been crazy and I've just been exhausted.

Welcome to all of the newbies.

Jenn, Congrats on breaking the plateau. You know, there are creepy guys everywhere---some that pray on the "poor fat girl" because they think the girl has no self-esteem and will be so thankful that someone is interested (I admit--been there, done that) and other men that pray on the "thin pretty girl" because they know how to treat a woman right (HA!) But, I do know what you mean...how does someone attract the RIGHT attention? If anyone figures that out, they'll be BILLIONAIRES instantly. :D

Ufi, The evenings and weekends are hardest for me...especially because I'm alone and there's no one there to say, "you shouldn't eat that" except for myself. And, sometimes, I just don't want to listen to me! I work out after work so that helps me some. By the time I get home, all I want to do is eat, take a shower & go to sleep!

DLA, I think sometimes losing weight is easier being single. I don't have to worry about what I have to cook for someone else or if they'll like it. I just have to do for me! At the same time, it's really easy to pull through the drive-thru because no one is at home saying "no no no".

I'll try to be better about posting. Have a great week everyone.

Naia 08-13-2008 04:36 AM

Hi all! I haven't read through the whole thread yet, but I just had to post and say hello -- this is the right place for me!

I'm 36 (!!! I can't believe it sometimes), have never been married, no children. I've had a few relationships, and I'm in one now... but all we do is break up and get back together. We're in a "let's be friends" phase right now, but neither of us will actually date someone else. Sometimes I wish he would, just to get it over and done with for good. He can't handle the plateaus and the slow weight loss, or the loose skin so every now and then he freaks out. I understand it, but I'm getting pretty sick of it. Dating while being heavy just sucks.

I'm also the only heavy one in the family, and the only single one too. With no kids. Add that to being the eldest... and you have a very concerned parent breathing down your neck. I want to say, "leave me alone, I'm 36 and this is just how it's going to be. No grandchildren for you!" But that would really be too mean, and I just can't do it. Except inside my head :-)

Now I've promised myself I'm going to start getting to bed earlier. My goal is before midnight, so I didn't quite make it. But at least it's before 2am! And I have the bed all to myself! (have to think of the positives!). :)

zacharysmom 08-17-2008 04:44 PM

hi there
 
I've never been to this site, but makes sense for me. I'm 32, never married with no kids (zachary is my sweet-boy doggie). I'm not in a relationship now, but was until 6 months ago, when i found out the dude was hiding a kid in the wings. Um, suffice it to say I said BYE BYE. Anyway, on the fourth of July, and old boyfriend from 8 years ago found me on facebook, and now, of course, wants to make a plan for a visit. GULP, I'm 30 pounds heavier now with no sufficient excuse. I've put him off for over a month now, and I'm depressed about it. So I've decided to get on Nutri-system. I've tried it my way for over 4 years now, and it's not working. Sad that a man, in the end, has been motivation for me, but I guess beggars can't be choosers. Well, if anyone can relate, its gotta be someone reading this! THANKS FOR READING.

bumble 08-20-2008 12:16 AM

Hey Peeps! Hope everyone is doing well.

I have recently joined the ranks of "thirtysomething". I turned thirty in july. I am also of the single without children persuasion. I am so happy to have found yall. After reading through the posts I don't feel so alone in my own predicament.

I was moderately active on the boards in january and had a great start to the year, a lot of positivity, very proactive and optimistic. Life then decided to happen, as life tends to do, and I lost focus which was then followed by a complete abandonment of purpose.

I am currently in school and working. So, a social life really poses no hindrance as I am completely lacking in that area. (I am not sorry for this particular detail at the moment as I am totally in love with school and would rather be there than at a bar or club.)

My biggest obstacle at the moment is rolling my backside out of bed earlier in the morning in order to workout. My eating habits aren't horrendous (too much soda right now, but that is easily corrected). No, my extra weight will not be shaken by a mere diet. I have the stuff that won't budge without some serious cardio and a LOT of sweating.

The emotional situations that have been presented throughout the thread have definitely resonated with me as well. I definitely have a distorted sense of self and use being fat as the reason I have intamacy issues.

So thank you all for sharing. Your views and struggles are very insightful and helpful to me. I look forward to sharing more with you myself. I also look forward to hearing about your own progress and wish you much success.

ViolinJenn 08-20-2008 01:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bumble (Post 2324195)
Hey Peeps! Hope everyone is doing well.

I am currently in school and working. So, a social life really poses no hindrance as I am completely lacking in that area. (I am not sorry for this particular detail at the moment as I am totally in love with school and would rather be there than at a bar or club.)

Welcome Bumble and newcomers!:welcome2:

Bumble-I am at the same point! I start school however on the second, only a week and a half away. It'll be my first semester since I graduated from Community College 13 years ago! I'm so excited I cannot wait! I'm looking forward to the challanges and meeting new people, friends and maybe that special someone, ya never know! The way my luck tends to run is when I'm not looking and can least afford it time wise, WHAM! Into my life walks a great person and I won't even see it coming! I'm not a bar or club girl. LOL..I can't dance and don't like to drink my calories.

Anyway ladies, not much new to report from me. School starts on 9/2 and I'm taking an Algebra class to start off. I need the refresher before I can take Pre-Calculus and Calculus. I've been glued to the Olympics lately. OMG! Have you ladies been watching Men's Beach Volleyball?! Here's a reason, Phil Dalhausser! 6'9" of smokin hottness!!!!:drool::drool::drool::love::love: :love:

I'm slowly starting to come around from burning out at the gym this summer. It's finally fun again!

Sharkysmachine 08-20-2008 07:54 PM

Yay, I'm glad I found this thread/forum. I am 35, not married no kids and I do think it's very important to have that kind of space. I feel weird posting on threads when people my age have kids and stuff. I don't think it is their intention to be alienating, but I have found that women my age who have kids seem to act as though I don't have a "real" life or "real" problems. And that husbands and kids are "real" issues.

I'm not saying this has happened here, but my life is very different than a person who has a hubby and kids. I am in graduate school working on my PhD, most of my friends are in the same boat as me. I mean I can't relate to women who were thin during courtship and then got fat after having kids, which seems to be the dominate trope of many weight loss forums. I have always been FAT. I also can't relate to thinking that world ends at size 14, which is another recurring trope of many of these once-thin-now-fat-trying-to-get-thin again tropes. It's not for me.

Anyway, I hope I haven't offended folks.

kickemjenny 08-22-2008 01:59 PM

Hi Sharky
I understand your dilemma. I am also single never married, no kids and it sometimes it is hard to relate to those with children. I don't think the MwKs mean to alienate us but as we don't have the same concerns or trials they do, it is a little difficult to appreciate their issues and vice versa. However once people are genuinely caring the marital status becomes irrelevant

Secondly, I also do not know what it's like to be thin, but I think the mindset of life ending at size 14 has more to do with your culture and the 'glamification' of stick thin people which is unfortunate. Where I come from (the Caribbean) big girls are HOT!

Ufi 08-24-2008 04:06 PM

In an emotional slump prompted by the wedding anniversary of a man I loved who married someone else.

kickemjenny 08-26-2008 10:05 AM

UFi
I empathize with you. These situations are always difficult. I went through a similar thing a few years ago. At least my best friend/ex didn't marry the girl though they dated for 5 years. Not only was i still in love with him and hurt as a result, but I also beat myself up emotionally because I thought that I should have been able to just forget about him and move on yet somehow could not. It was very, very frustrating and I cried a lot.

cherrycolored 09-02-2008 10:02 PM

Hey gang... another girl in the same boat dealing with all the same issues. 35, single, never married don't have or want kids.... I am in the burbs of philly and got a kick out of seeing a bunch of others in here from the same area...
Dating in this area SUCKS.
I broke my leg in january and prior to that was diagnosed with insulin resistance so it was a double whammy of disaster. I am just starting to be able to walk with no pain now. i broke my fibula and my ankle in two places. Being single and hurt like that sucked. I am lucky to have a wonderful family though.
Yeah I am really going through it with hating myself for letting my weight get away from me. I used the metabolic syndrome as an excuse for too long now. I am so nervous about meeting anyone now because I am so preoccupied with the notion that no one would want to date me because I am overweight and forget about all the things about me that would make any man lucky to have me. I have to work on that. Good to be here.

ViolinJenn 09-03-2008 08:24 PM

Welcome Sharkey, Jenny and Cherry!:welcome2:
Cherry-I'm also in the Philly burbs(Levittown) and you're right dating in the area sucks, but I remind myself that Life always puts me where I need to be when I need to be there(the good and the bad). Right now, I need to focus on school.

However Ladies, right now I'm embracing my singleness! Classes started this week, yesterday 9/2 actually.:book2::book2: So right now I have no time to date since I need my time to adjust to being in college again after a 13 year hiatus!:fr::fr: It's going to be rough, but I'm excited. So I may only be around on weekends.

Let's keep our meals and snacks healthy:chef::chef:and our bodies in motion!:lifter::exercise::woops:

Naia 09-04-2008 06:28 AM

Hey Ufi -- how are you doing? I know it's hard, I totally get where you're coming from. I'm trying to pull myself out of a slump too. :) Do something nice for yourself, and keep writing here -- we're all pulling for you! :hug:

Cherry -- Sometimes it's hard to remember we are not our weight! I'm just coming out of a relationship where he said I was the perfect girl for him... *if* I lost loads of weight, and got skin surgery when I was finished. Everyone on here gave me so much support, and reminded me that I'm a worthy, wonderful person no matter what my weight may be, and I want to do the same to you. Any guy worth his salt will see you for who you are, and love you for yourself. Take it from me, any guy who doesn't isn't worth all the trials and tribulations :)

Bumble -- you sound just like me! I was doing good, then... well, stuff just happened and I abandoned ship. Now I'm back trying again. I definitely need to cut back more on the diet soda & work on my diet, but really, the only thing that works for me is a whole bunch of cardio & weights. Must. Sweat. Alot.

ViolinJenn -- What are you getting your degree in? Are you going back for a BA or an MA? I've been thinking about going back too, but haven't decided if I'm brave enough to give up a steady paycheck for homework.

cherrycolored 09-04-2008 04:37 PM

Naia... ugh that's awful And I agree with you. I could never date anyone who didn't want me for me either. And you are seriously gorgeous!! You may have dodged a big ole bullet with that one. Yeah my ex is getting married to the girl he cheated on me with this upcoming weekend. Fabulous. But actually with him I am relieved he's not my problem anymore and now it will be official that he is someone else's problem... for as long as she puts up with him. I am taking off and getting out of town so I don't let it bother me. It's not now but you know how that stuff sneaks up on you.

Ufi 09-05-2008 12:14 AM

I'm doing better. Still a bit glum, but I thought back on an old cheater boyfriend and felt so glad that I'm not with him. It may be hard, but at least I'm not worried about getting an STD. Also, I bought myself a flower, and that made me feel better.

Naia 09-05-2008 02:05 AM

Cherry -- Thank you!!! I feel like I dodged a bullet, too. Although sometimes I miss him and get :( or :dizzy: , for the most part I'm just concentrating on why its better now.

Ufi & Cherry -- Doesn't it make you feel better to think, at least *I* don't have to deal with his problems & cheating & BS he dishes out? I know it makes me feel better :) I keep reviewing the lists of things that drove me crazy, and things I just couldn't stand anymore to keep me feeling glad its over.

My x-bf didn't cheat, but I know at the end I was just... I don't know.. just almost hoping he would cheat, because then I could really stand up and say, "Okay! It's over! Let her deal with you!" And really, you're so much better off, especially on the STD front!!!

Ufi - I'm glad you're feeling a little better! :hug: Flowers make me feel better too. Just looking at them can make me happy. And btw, thank you for all the good advise & support on the other thread! So far so good, with the whole x-bf situation right now.

Ufi 09-06-2008 10:03 PM

Naia, you're welcome! I've been through my share of sad sacks, and I figure someone ought to benefit from my earned wisdom!

Single and mostly happy is better than attached and often miserable.

Naia 09-08-2008 02:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ufi (Post 2350137)
Naia, you're welcome! I've been through my share of sad sacks, and I figure someone ought to benefit from my earned wisdom!

Single and mostly happy is better than attached and often miserable.

You can say this again! And again! And again! I went thru a hellish weekend. Had to go to a wedding that my ex & I had originally been invited to together. I had to go and was hoping he wouldn't... but he did. And no one had seen us lately, and a lot of them were older family friends. Which, as I'm sure many of us here have experienced, want dreadfully for you to get married. Because being so old and unattached is just such a dreadful thing! So, they all assume we aren't married because he has commitment issues and want to give me advice on how to "get him to marry me". And I'm like... I wouldn't marry him if he asked!!!! Which just gets shocked looks, and tsk tsks.

So, during all this as I try to explain "WE ARE BROKEN UP" as in "BROKEN" as in "NOT FIXABLE", he is there telling everyone we *are* together. Or at least, he's not telling anyone we're broken up, and the people I've told we are broken up he tsk tsks back and says I'm just upset.

So this goes on, and then today I have it out with him, which turns into a big emotional scene. When you have 4 years of history together, there are definitely buttons that get pushed and you can't help reacting, even as you know those are just buttons being pushed.

Anyway. Now he says we are *really* going to date other people, like it's some sort of punishment to me for rejecting him. I'm really not sure which was worse, the conversation tonight or the wedding yesterday.

If one more kindly older lady or grocery clerk or well-meaning relative asks me why I'm not married, and "don't I want kids???!" I'm going to go insane and drive my happily single two-door non-family car right into them! Or burst into tears and say I can't have children :devil: Which is (seriously) what I did to the grocery clerk who would NOT leave me alone with the questions. Given, it was a PMS moment, but he's never bothered me with the questions again!!

cherrycolored 09-08-2008 02:01 PM

Oh girl, that's awful! I am so sorry! It's sucky to have to goto weddings. God, I haven't gone to one in over 4 years, lol....
I had some good news today myself. I don't know how many or if any of you are using the South Beach plan for your "dieting needs" but wow!
I had some great news this morning at my endocrinologist's appointment. I can't believe the dramatic results I am seeing in my blood work after just 3 weeks on SB. I have had pretty severe insulin resistance and cholesterol issues from metabolic syndrome. Since my last appointment in May my insulin levels have dropped 17 POINTS!! And my triglycerides dropped 50 POINTS!! Its unreal! Total cholesterol dropped 11 points!! So even though the scale seems to have completely STOPPED moving, something good is going on in my body. I should be out of insulin issues in a month or two if I keep up what I am doing. So i am excited and though I would share. Hope you ladies all have a great week!!

Ufi 09-08-2008 10:33 PM

Woooooo, scary. Going to date other people. Now you're shaking in your boots. What a doorknob.

I so understand the "don't you want kids" thing. Unless it's an emotional day, I try to answer with humor, like, "Yes, to boil them in my cauldron. Oh, so yummy." But it hurts to see people with their little babies or even their older children that they aren't appreciating.

Naia 09-09-2008 04:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cherrycolored (Post 2352115)
Since my last appointment in May my insulin levels have dropped 17 POINTS!! And my triglycerides dropped 50 POINTS!! Its unreal! Total cholesterol dropped 11 points!! So even though the scale seems to have completely STOPPED moving, something good is going on in my body. I should be out of insulin issues in a month or two if I keep up what I am doing.

:bravo: Yay!!!!! That's so good!! :cheer3: Don't you just love it when you finally see something positive?! Like, finally! All this hard work is paying off!! :hyper: Plus, it's really encouraging to see real documented results - you can do this!! Keep us updated !!!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ufi (Post 2352847)
Woooooo, scary. Going to date other people. Now you're shaking in your boots. What a doorknob.

I know! It's such a punishment, I just don't know what to do! Hmm... maybe... go out and celebrate, do a little dance! He's so clueless.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ufi (Post 2352847)
I so understand the "don't you want kids" thing. Unless it's an emotional day, I try to answer with humor, like, "Yes, to boil them in my cauldron. Oh, so yummy."

LOL. I do that too! Or I say, "you know, I really do, but last time I tried to take some home from the store, their parents got really mad at me." Sometimes I just get too fed up with it though. Especially when it's people acting like it was some big choice of yours, like you're anti-children or something.

It's such a stupid question, because either way its really none of their business. Either you chose not to have children (for whatever personal reasons) or you haven't been able to have children (can't, haven't had the opportunity, etc). Whichever it is, it's none of their business. If they really wanted a truthful answer, then their asking for some very private information. What if I had been trying to get pregnant for years and was infertile? How would they like the answer then?!

Just a little venting, still sore over some of the comments at the wedding. My favorite was an old family friend who came up to me and pinched my cheek (which annoys me already), and then tells me I'd have such beautiful babies... when was I going to make her proud and invite her to a baby shower? Like... she can't be proud of me until I procreate? I almost said, "as soon as I pick out a sperm donor, I'll let you know" but caught myself before it came out of my mouth, and changed "sperm donor" to "father". I didn't want her calling my mom to tell her what word I said! :D My mom still considers "sperm" a bad word. If she heard my day-to-day vocabulary... :dizzy:

ViolinJenn 09-09-2008 07:27 AM

Hi Ladies,

Naia-I'm working on my Bachelor's in Accounting. I transferred my Associates from community college, that I received in Dec 1995, and I am now on that long road to my Bacholor's in Accounting, then hopefully it's off to Grad School for my Master's then the CPA exam! It'll take time to do all this because I'm taking only 1 class a semester. Working full-time (my company reimburses for tuition. All I have to do is get a C or better), class, getting to the gym 3 times a week, homework and the stuff of life I stay pretty busy. I am really liking and excited about school. I'm also looking forward to meeting new people and networking some.


I understand completely the whole "you DON'T want kids?!" thing. I get that alot too. Kids aren't for everyone. I tell people that means more $$$ and toys for me!:D

I'd love for society to realize that there is no sin in not getting married and having kids. Heck our divorce rate is what 50% these days?

cherrycolored 09-12-2008 05:22 PM

Just checking to say hi and seriously! TGIF. Its been a long overly stressful week and I am so glad to be done with it. I hope you lovely ladies have wonderful weekends!!:carrot::carrot:

Naia 09-15-2008 07:27 PM

Hey guys!

My weekend was pretty uneventful. I didn't get in as much exercise as I should've, but I did finish reading the fourth Twilight book :p

Jenn -- That's so great your work pays for school! I have a friend who's doing that too, her work pays as long as she passes the class.

I agree with the whole divorce rate & kids thing. My mom thinks its something with our generation -- We'd rather be single than settle. I don't disagree, but I think it's a good thing rather than the way she thinks of it :devil: I *would* rather be single than settle. Plus, then I get everything my own way and I always have control of the remote, and the choice to buy whatever gadgets I want! :D At this point, I'm not sure I *could* share finances with someone.

Anyway, hope you all had a good weekend and are off to a good week!

pengbear 09-15-2008 07:53 PM

Wait-WHAT?? There's a single thirtysomething thread? I don't have rattle off my statistics of single, no kids, a dog, I grocery shop for 1, and I won't get pitying looks? Well, hello Ladies!

Quote:

I *would* rather be single than settle. Plus, then I get everything my own way and I always have control of the remote, and the choice to buy whatever gadgets I want! At this point, I'm not sure I *could* share finances with someone.
Um yeah. What Naia said.

Naia 09-15-2008 08:11 PM

Hey, welcome!!! You've found the right place! :D

I *know* those looks at the grocery store... Only, instead of shopping for one, I shop for myself and my grandfather (he stays with me), and my 3 cats. Now, this doesn't sound so bad on paper, but the cats are voracious and my grampa is a heavy gin drinker. I mean, heavy. He's 83, so I figure he might as well enjoy himself now. But... Our staples, that I must purchase at every store shopping trip include a few bottles of gin, vermouth, milk, about 40 cans of cat food & a big ole stack of lean cuisines for me.

Now. I can only imagine what the clerks think of me. I'd guess... The crazy gin-drinking cat lady who lives alone and eats tv dinners. And maybe ... does she mix gin & milk ? disgusting! There is no actual mixing of the milk and gin, but my grampa does drink milk at every meal, and then follows it up with his gin martini. Still kind of gross to my way of thinking :)

Sometimes I switch my regular ring to my "ring finger" just to not feel judged. I guess that's a little bit silly... but after one grocery clerk would NOT stop asking why I wasn't married, and didn't I WANT kids (seriously, it was like a SNL skit) I figure it's a small thing to keep me from yelling at people in the grocery store :D

Anyway! Welcome again!

Ufi 09-15-2008 11:52 PM

Crazy gin-drinking cat lady. LOL!

With recovering from surgery, I was wishing this weekend I had someone around to help. You, man. Pick up heavy thing. Drive places because I'm too stoned on painkillers. Water lawn. But then there's the trick of finding one who won't give me a hard time about crying over "The Marilyn Hotchkiss Ballroom Dancing and Charm School."

cherrycolored 09-16-2008 06:29 PM

I live in the burbs of philly and in a town filled with soccer moms and escalades. Everyone is way to self involved to care about my status. My parents are even pretty cool with it. They are just sad because they want me to be happy. So yeah.
I went on a tragically bad date last night and I have managed to keep my head above water and out of a bag of bread. I also hit 20 pounds down today so that kind of made the bad feeling wash away a little bit. But wow. what a disaster. He had so much to talk about on the phone for the past two weeks and barely could muster the ability to converse when we went out. Pretty awful. But its okay. I lived. So yeah I am seriously not even attempting that again for another month or so.
God. men are jerks. Really.

cherrycolored 09-16-2008 06:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pengbear (Post 2363183)
Wait-WHAT?? There's a single thirtysomething thread? I don't have rattle off my statistics of single, no kids, a dog, I grocery shop for 1, and I won't get pitying looks? Well, hello Ladies!

Um yeah. What Naia said.

I like you already! Welcome!

AnnRue 09-16-2008 06:53 PM

Hey all...

Ohh tough month for a single gal. Two, count um, two, girls in my office got married and had showers. Gripe one, I don't get a b-day party thrown for me how dare the office take time out for that kind of party? IMHO totally inappropriate. Gripe two, one of the girls had a 4 week engagement after knowing the guy 2 months. Can you see disaster ahead? Or something else. Not a word is said at how inappropriate it is to marry someone you met 3 months ago, but instead I have to pony up funds for her and also keep my mouth shut.

You would NOT believe the gifts she got. We are talking expensive stuff. Engraved things... from people she hardly knows. My god. I need to find some guy, any guy right now, to rake in substantial amounts of cash.

It is truly unbelievable. It is as if people will do anything to maintain *the dream* of true love.

pengbear 09-16-2008 07:07 PM

Thanks for the warm welcome!
Cherrycolored, I LOVE your avatar! I adore pin-ups. My mom, bless her heart, is convinced that I'm a lesbian because I have several framed and hanging in my bedroom. Why else would a girl want pictures of half-nekkid ladies on the wall?:D

And Naia, yes, I've gotten some weird comments at the grocery store too, except I'm on a low-carb diet, so there's meat, and eggs, and dairy, and lots of "man" food, but just little old me paying for it. I had a kindly lady at Krogers (because here in the south you can't just pay for something. You have to discuss it with your cashier.) inform me that if I bought more ladylike foods, I may change the look of that ringfinger! Seriously? Ladylike foods? What, like roast beef with lace on it? I just stared at her, and said "I didn't know I could only buy the pink food!!" I was dumbfounded. Just shut up and let me pay for my food.

cherrycolored 09-16-2008 08:08 PM

I am low carb as well pengbear. I am a big fan of pinups myself and when i reach my goal weight I am getting professional pics done from a pin up photographer to celebrate. It costs about $400 bucks but I will need to document the moment. And funny... being low carb and being at the grocery store are very common it seems. i am there, like, daily and I spend $60 each time on meats and cheese and other junk to get me through the day but have yet to have someone discuss it with me. Thats funny... RB with Lace. hehehehe

pengbear 09-16-2008 08:24 PM

Oh, what a cool way to celebrate your weight loss! That's such a great idea, totally worth the $ 400.
I haven't decided what to do when I get to goal. At my first major goal I got a tattoo, but unfortunately right now the best reward I can think of is a giant pizza and a gooey buttercake. And rewarding with food is a no-no.

And yeah, I've noticed I go to the grocery store a lot more often on low-carb, like 5 times a week or so.

Marms 09-16-2008 09:30 PM

I'm won't be 30 until next May, but I can definitely relate. In the past 2 years ALL my friends have gotten married and started having kids, so my social life is pretty much nonexistent. I get asked why I'm not married or why I don't have a boyfriend all the time. I just don't understand why this is the only question people can think to ask. A husband, 2.5 kids and a white picket fence were never part of my plans.

P.S. I live in the Philly 'burbs also (pottstown).

cherrycolored 09-17-2008 03:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Marms (Post 2365019)
I'm won't be 30 until next May, but I can definitely relate. In the past 2 years ALL my friends have gotten married and started having kids, so my social life is pretty much nonexistent. I get asked why I'm not married or why I don't have a boyfriend all the time. I just don't understand why this is the only question people can think to ask. A husband, 2.5 kids and a white picket fence were never part of my plans.

P.S. I live in the Philly 'burbs also (pottstown).

Welcome! I am right up the road in Exton actually!!

pengbear 09-18-2008 08:27 PM

Hey Marms, if you have any siblings, wait till THEY get married and have children. Then your folks will start giving you gentle reminders that your nieces and nephews need cousins, etc. And if you're really lucky, it'll be your YOUNGER siblings! Gah.


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