I am not on any kind of depression meds. I was years ago but had issues with them and it is really not an option now as I have no insurance.

Anyway, I am soooo sick of the struggle. I am sick of loathing myself. I am sick of the media. I am sick of the "looks" from people and being asked when my baby is due. I am sick of needing clothes and refusing to go buy them because I have a wardrobe of nice clothes that I could wear if I only lost 20 pounds! Why cant I just be happy with how and who I am AT THIS MOMENT. My metabolism is zilch now that I am 40 and I cannot exercise (cardio) because of injury.

I know I just have to reach down inside myself and find the strength but I am just so frickin' tired of it all! Sometimes the pressure on myself is so great I am ready to starve myself and be done with it....or have my darn mouth wired shut.

[Savora]

i am on meds and wish i wasnt im going to the doctor tomorrow to see if he'll switch them but i dont know... as far as feeling down all the time i understand that completely... you've lost 7lbs so far thats great.. i've been to the gym for 4 days straight, cut out sodas, watch what i ate got put on a dr prescribed diet pill and still havent lost a pound so good job with your weight loss and keep on pushing

[ray of sunshine]

Sounds like youre sick and tired of being sick and tired!! Great place to overcome!! you have it within you all you have to do is DO IT!!! you can !!cant wait to see you in the in the goal section!!! =)

[harrismm]

I do understand what you are going through.I went off medications a couple of years ago.I really dont think I felt any better on them.I feel like you do every day.I have a good job,great family and friends.Why in the world am I so unhappy???I keep telling myself I would be happy if I lost the weight but to be honest I think I would just find another reason to be unhappy.I am also your age.That is depressing enough.LOL!!!Hang in there with me girl.

[neon_zephyr]

I know how you feel! My closet is literally overflowing at the moment and almost nothing fits me. I've gone through several stages. I don't want to buy new clothes because I keep telling myself that this time, I'm going to lose weight and fit into the nice things I have. In the meantime, I'm feeling awful about myself because nothing fits right. I struggle from depression too and am not on any medications. I find that when I'm most blue, it's harder to motivate myself to exercise or even eat. I've gone days without eating and just drinking tea in the past instead, but I think that over time, excessive fasting leads to problems. The hardest thing sometimes is just telling myself that I have to eat something in a day because it's tough to reconcile eating with weight loss. I don't have anything particularly encouraging to add, except that you're not alone!

[VermontMom]

I'm so sorry you're feeling so bad at this time It almost always helps me to come here to get support, and read of others' struggles. Is there any kind of exercise you can do, is walking an option? Sometimes it helps to be able to know that you are in control of just one thing, maybe it could be taking a daily walk, or sitting in a chair doing some leg lifts or lifting soup cans (if you don't have weights). Really sorry that meds are not an option due to no insurance, no one should have to suffer because they can't afford medication but I know that a reality. Best wishes to you

Thanks for all the encouragement. I am not sure I am "clinically" depressed. I am just sad because my life is not where I want it to be right now. I know it will get better! It has to go up...cause I'm about at the bottom right now!

[JellyBean32882]

I know how you feel angelmom, been there and done that with the depression and refusing to buy clothes because I have alot that would fit if I was a bit smaller.
My depression I have had for years and actually was diagnosed as having Major Depression by my therapist. I stopped seeing a therapist and stopped meds years ago because I didn't qualify for medical insurance anymore and I wasn't working. I'm still not working and have no medical to this day.
I've done the whole fasting/starving and even restricting deal and I have to tell you personally that it doesn't work. In fact I gained more being that way, and most I know have done the same thing.

I'm getting fed up with my weight gain as well, but it's hard to lose when you are depressed, stressed, and not working like me. I'm sick of having to wear baggy sweatshirts in spring/summer just cause it hides my weight. I'm sick of my dad *****ing about political crap and how the world and finances are gonna affect me. I keep telling him you can't do anything about it and he obviously won't listen cause he keeps saying the same crap over and over again.. no wonder I've been eating NONSTOP.

Life will get better. It has to. Thanks to you all for posting to try to help.