[kaebea]

Hi girls (mostly)

just wondering lately...Do you feel that the reason you mainly binge is comfort?

I have things in my life, like i'm sure many people do that cause me to be unsettled and to have worry in the back of my mind, even on a day when i otherwise feel good.

In general i'm an anxious person. i have a hard time with forming close bonds and friendships with people. and my self esteem is somewhat lacking.

but i'm wondering if the main reason people binge eat is for comfort, and perhaps if we felt more at peace, there would be no need for the binges.

anyone else feel the same?

[thinpossible]

I absolutely eat soothe to ease anxiety, it's probably the number one reason I want to eat when I'm not hungry. Followed closely by boredom, at number two.

[RN BSN 2009]

Yes, anxiety is related, that's for sure. Food can be a soother. but no more for me.

[leela0730]

I'm a pretty anxious person too, and I think you've got a point. If I felt relaxed and at peace more frequently, I think I would binge less frequently. My binges are almost always related to a need to feel comforted, which is why my binge foods are always the same foods that bring back a comforting memory from my childhood.

For me, growing more at peace with life and the world is a huge part of taking control of my eating patterns. I'm pretty intentional now about coming up with ways to reduce my anxiety and thereby stay on track with my eating.

[2ndChance09]

I am a very anxious person and have always strugged with anxiety, depression and low self esteem. I def. think all that plays a part.

[CousinRockingChair]

I don't binge any more, but I think when I did it was very much to do with anxiety. I still have anxiety now, in fact it's grown since I stopped binge eating because I don't have an outlet any more. I'd rather have some uncomfortable feelings than have them whilst feeling fat and spending all that money on binge eating, though.

[flappychappy]

Hi everyone,
I have been doing some reading in the last months on Binge eating...mind you I have not be able to stop binging....

Anyway, according to the "experts" binging arises as a defense mechanism in children who can not find comfort in their life. Sometimes the cause is an absent parent (either emotionally distant or physically absent) or a chaotic home life that sends a child to the one source of comfort left...food.

While,that helps me understand my binges...but I am not sure that it helps me prevent them...

I always think that I will try yoga to try to calm my anxiety but that just never seems to work out...

If anyone has any reading material they would suggest to help understand binging I would love the try them...
Kathy

[Spoz]

Kathy - Overcome binge eating by Dr C Fairburne. It's recommended by the British NHS and brings together alot of the research that has gone into binge disorders and has a self help program. It really does give you an insight into the roots of these problems and shows it to be a common issue.

[doIlookfat?]

I have always suffered from high anxiety and nervousness, especially when I was little. I sucked my thumb till I was 6 years old! I also used to chew my sleeves, and I still bite my nails to the nub. I see a correlation between all these things and what I'm doing for my high anxiety levels now....eating. It works, just like my thumb did.

There is something about my mouth and soothing my anxiety. Thank God I never got into smoking or drinking, but I can see how if I started I would be addicted to that too.

There has to be a correlation between soothing oneself and putting things in our mouths. It just makes sense to me. I wish there was an adult pacifier I could use. Maybe that would be a healthier way to calm my nerves!

I'm weird, I know.

Heidi

[MyChoice2bfit]

I know that I binge eat for comfort and it has to do when I'm anxious. I used to think it was when I was sad but in the past 10 years I had two really sad events happen and during those I couldn't eat. It is just when I'm anxious that I seek the comfort of food.

I"m determined that I will find a way to overcome this, now that I really know what is behind my weight issues. In fact it is my focus for 2009.

Thank you for the recommendation on the book. I looked it up on Boaders and I can get it there..I'm going to buy it right away.

What are some things that the rest of you do to try and overcome eating for comfort? How do you deal with taming the feeling of being anxious?

[kaebea]

how interesting that everyone has such a similar answer. i will have to read the book by C Fairbourne when i have a chance. But i'm kind of drained from reading self help books for the moment and am taking a break with some enjoyable works of fiction.

well, here's something just to share then.
Although i didn't have a bad childhood, and i never doubted that i was loved by my parents at the end of the day, I did not have a close, close bond with either. I had a big family, so one on one was infrequent.
My father was the most distant, always at work, and emotionally distant and with an explosive temper when he was home.
I was always more comfortable with my mother. But always felt i was vying for her attention.
I think she rejected me in subtle ways that made a big impact. I know now that she favors my older and youngest brothers. I wonder if i knew it subconsiously when i was a young child.

I wonder if i would be more secure if i had more supportive parents growing up? I know that i can't go back ,and i don't expect my parents to be perfect people, i know they did the best they could.

well, i guess there are all sorts of reasons a child can grow up feeling alone and vulnerable, probably as many different scenarios as there are people.

i suppose we learn ways to be strong and deal with life, and unfortunately we turn to the comfort of addictions too. how sad.

and Mychoice2bfit, i don't really have a good way to feel more secure and deal with my bingeing . I've tried many things, but as you can see, i'm still here.
i know that if i avoid sugar and processed foods, i loose my craving, but come on, it's pretty hard when we are bombarded on all sides by donuts, brownies, and kisses.
Sometimes i try to do mindful breathing, but haven't been able to make it a regular habit. and i want to do yoga, but am having a hard time getting into a class by some odd twists of fate

i'd like to hear what others have done to feel more secure and less anxious as well.

[flappychappy]

Spoz thanks so much for the book suggestion...I already ordered it on Amazon!

kaebea, reading your post made me feel as if I was reading about myself..distant father...distracted mother...wow.
I wonder if binge eating is also about control? I know that food was always a source of comfort for me but like most eating disorders I wonder if gaining some form of control in our lives plays a part in our binges?

Oh well I will wait for the book and learn from the expert!

MyChoice2bfit, I have tried the 15 minute rule...if I want to binge I force myself to go to a different room and wait 15 minutes Usually during that 15 minutes I try to turn on the TV, read a book or magazine or even do some Yoga stretches..

I can't say that has helped enormously but I do think that the most important part is to get out of the kitchen!

Oh well here is to another day of making my dreams come true by gaining control of my eating!!
Good luck everyone!
Kathy

[CousinRockingChair]

I'm not at all sure the most common cause of bingeing originates with childhood. Many more women than men binge. I'm with the feminists on the whole, the fact that eating disorders are largely a female problem..is very significant.

Why do women look to food to deal with life's problems? Whole load of literature out there. Eating disorder rates have risen the more women are supposedly liberated.

[kelly315]

I used to be tired all the time, and have a hard time sleeping- when I used to binge, it would help me go to sleep. It's something I had done since I was a middle schooler, binged so I could take a good nap.

[monikacool]

I also think that most times I binge because I am tired. When after dinner I feel stuffed after going through all sorts of junk foods, Ben and Jerry's, chips and candy bars, I feel so sleepy, and I usually have no problems getting asleep. If I try to diet or eat less than 2000 calories, I have troubles getting asleep and start feeling very anxious. Food is my Valium. I just wish I could function on a sensible 1600 calories, and hopefully lose a few pounds.