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Old 09-08-2008, 10:12 PM   #1  
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Default So upset!

I just have to say that I am getting SOOOO frustrated with people not noticing/commenting on my weight loss - which is 64lbs. since Januaryy! I lost about 30 lbs. over the summer and went back to school - nothing. No one said anything! Then this weekend I was out on the beach with my parents in a new suit, I've lost about 15lbs since seeing them last - nothing! They have nagged me about weight my whole life, but haven't commented once since this diet started. I know I'm doing it for me, and I shouldn't need that - but I do! I feel like I am SO obviously different now - but I feel invisible! and it can't be said that my classmates are nervous to say anything because another girl in my class went from 210 to 140 and she is all people talk about!! I would love someone to just see me and say "wow"!
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Old 09-08-2008, 10:20 PM   #2  
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Sometimes people are funny. Could they be envious? My mother is good for that. She is always telling me to lose weight, commenting on my bad choice of clothing, now that I am down a few pounds, she says nothing and might I add, my few pounds down is NOTHING compared to your amazing success. Hey keep going and flaunt it like the "HOT" woman you are. You know you look fabulous, hold your head high,flash your brillant smile,
push up the boobs, and strut your stuff. You go girl !!
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Old 09-08-2008, 10:21 PM   #3  
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As long as YOUR noticing it, nothing else really matters.
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Old 09-08-2008, 10:35 PM   #4  
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One thing to think about ... if you do a search on the site here, you'll find that opinions are VERY mixed about getting comments on your weight loss. Some people are actually VERY offended if people make personal comments about them losing weight.

I personally don't understand that but I've learned that it's true.

So consider that some people may not be commenting on your loss because they are afraid of offending you.

Also the girl they talk about - do they talk to her face, or just *about* her?

.
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Old 09-08-2008, 10:36 PM   #5  
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Well, I guess I can't knock some sense into your friends and family from here. But maybe this will help: Da**, 65 pounds is fantastic!!!!

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Old 09-08-2008, 11:11 PM   #6  
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Yes, 65 lbs gone is fantastic, and I'm sorry that more people haven't commented on it. But, I agree with photochick that many people can't decide whether to mention it or not. If they mention it, they're afraid you'll think that means that they thought you were fat. If they don't mention it, there afraid you'll think they think you're still fat, etc, etc. I've even been there myself, until I lost weight and realized that it was a lot of work and effort and I wanted it to at least be acknowledged.

Sooner or later though, people won't be able to ignore it and you will hear so many comments on it that you will get tired of them. Just keep doing what you're doing and don't let the lack of comments/compliments right now get you down.
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Old 09-08-2008, 11:19 PM   #7  
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Wow!
Way to go on losing 65 pounds!
That is a huge accomplishment.
So far as the other girl's weight loss, I agreee... are people talking about it to her face or behind her back? Maybe all of your positive comments are happening so that you aren't hearing.
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Old 09-09-2008, 12:07 AM   #8  
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why don't you post some pics, we all love to see progress around here!
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Old 09-09-2008, 01:04 AM   #9  
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Trust me they notice. The reasons that they aren't commenting are endless; jealousy, not wanting to come off as rude, not knowing what to say, etc.

You are doing great! I also agree with Photochick, I found it very annoying when some people would comment. I used to get the funniest (and wrong) advice from people.
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Old 09-09-2008, 06:29 AM   #10  
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Having lost large amounts of weight several times I've noticed that each time I lose, folks are slower and more reluctant to comment. For me I think it is about the yoyoing...I suspect that until I both lose and maintain for a while no one will say anything much.

I've found that "asking" really helps, but I limit it to a few folks. (My mom, my sister, and my husband.) I've also found that newer friends (folks who didn't live through the previous loss and subsequent gain) seem to be more comfortable with commenting.

It may take a while...but it will happen! In the meantime, are you dressing differently? Old baggy clothes can hide that loss!

When all is said and done.... 65 pounds! Wow! You look terrific!
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Old 09-09-2008, 06:31 AM   #11  
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you are doing GREAT... be patient!!!!
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Old 09-09-2008, 07:15 AM   #12  
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It's frustrating when you want people to be 'dancing the happy dance' with you and they don't....especially your family. I am sorry that you aren't getting that wonderful feedback and reinforcement you'd like and deserve. I don't know any reasons more than what has been mentioned here.

You're accomplishments are awesome and I know that they show. Good job!!!! It's wonderful.

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Old 09-09-2008, 08:56 AM   #13  
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When I first start losing, I lose a lot of weight in my upper waist and my back and some in my stomach. My hips and thighs haven't lost many inches at all. I haven't received any comments about my weight loss, but I believe it's because I don't look much different yet. One day, the inches will start melting off of my hips and I'll look obviously slimmer. Could this be your situation? Are you losing in "inconspicuous" places first? They may see a difference in you, but just can't pinpoint what the difference might be. Hang in there. Your day is coming.

Last edited by GirlyGirlSebas; 09-09-2008 at 09:05 AM.
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Old 09-09-2008, 09:16 AM   #14  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GirlyGirlSebas View Post
When I first start losing, I lose a lot of weight in my upper waist and my back and some in my stomach. My hips and thighs haven't lost many inches at all. I haven't received any comments about my weight loss, but I believe it's because I don't look much different yet. One day, the inches will start melting off of my hips and I'll look obviously slimmer. Could this be your situation? Are you losing in "inconspicuous" places first? They may see a difference in you, but just can't pinpoint what the difference might be. Hang in there. Your day is coming.
Same here. When I lost 55 pounds last year, no one but my mother-in-law noticed. I knew why, too- I truly didn't look any different, I am afraid. Believe it or not, I lost weight in my feet and hands- my shoe size went down 2 sizes- who notices that? Still, it's no reason to give up- we're getting healthier and eventually, all this hard work and effort will pay off. Hang in there!
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Old 09-09-2008, 10:14 AM   #15  
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What a bummer! But I agree that some people might be withholding comments out of fear of offending you.

I don't want anything like that to happen to me. I took a picture of myself at the start... I think I'll paste it to my forehead.
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